Chapter 4

Ava

I could hear the beeping— it was faint, but present. My eyelids were heavy, but I forced them open. I blinked against the harsh light. My head didn't want to move as I attempted to look around. There was a window to my left, and Dad was sitting in a chair in the corner. "What's going on?" I forced the words out. My throat was scratchy.

Dad groaned as he stretched and sat up. "What do you remember?" He moved closer and squeezed my hand.

"Falling at the game." Flashes started to come back and I attempted to sit up. That's when the pain came back. My leg throbbed as pain shot up from my knee into my hip. My eyes darted down to see a giant cast encasing my entire leg. "Oh god." I groaned as I balled the sheets in my hands.

"You have a broken femur." Dad sounded so emotionless."They put pins in your leg to hold the pieces together. It's broken in two places."

"How long till I can play?" I could feel the tears coming and I forced them back. I swallowed and stared Dad in the eyes. "How long?"

"It'll be three months before you're out of the cast, then you'll have therapy for another twelve weeks." He squeezed my hand again before leaning back in the chair.

"That's the rest of the season." I attempted to blink the tears away, but I couldn't. One by one they spilled down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry, sweetie." Dad sighed.

"Sorry!" Anger came rushing to the forefront. "How can you be sorry? You have no idea what this is going to do to me! I am soccer! Without it, I'm nothing!" I picked up the empty water pitcher on the tray beside me and heaved it toward the wall.

"Ava!" The tone he only used when he meant business came cutting through the air. My eyes snapped to his and I felt like I was five again. He sighed as he leaned closer. "We'll get through this and you'll play again." He leaned down to kiss my forehead. "I'm going to get some food now that you're awake. The doctor was hoping to discharge you tonight."

"How's that going to work?" I grumbled. I lived in a second-floor apartment. No way was I getting around easily on my own.

"You're coming home for a while. You can stay in your old room, and Madi will be home to help during the day." He smiled as he left the room.

Great. Just what I wanted to do. Move home and be helpless. I crossed my arms over my chest and stewed in my anger. Deep down I knew my dad didn't have anything to do with this, and I was being unfair to him but I just didn't care. I was angry at the entire situation and he was the only one there at the moment.

"Welcome home." Dad smiled as he opened the car door. I stared up at the beach house I grew up in. It's only been two years since I moved out completely but it feels longer. I lived in the dorms my freshman year, so I came home on breaks, but when Ashley and I got our apartment, I stopped coming home. My dad or Madi would stop by and see me when they were in the area.

"It looks different," I muttered as he came around to my side, pushing a wheelchair. "How is this going to work?" I pointed at the stairs that led to the front door.

"Unfortunately, I've done this before." Dad's face went solemn for a moment before he pushed away the feeling and plastered a smile back on his face. I felt like an ass. I'm sure this was hard for him. Memories of my mom and how sick she got were probably coming back now that he was taking care of me, only I was too selfish to notice.

"I'm going to take all of this up, then I'll come back for you." He piled our things in the seat of the wheelchair and then carefully dragged it up the stairs. Once at the top, he emptied the contents into the living room, and turned the chair to face the top of the stairs. "Your turn." He jogged back down and stopped in front of me. As I stood, he hooked one arm behind my back, and the other under my legs and lifted me into his arms.

"Shiiiittt! That hurts." I let out a screech.

"I'm sorry, sweetie." He maneuvered up the steps and lowered me into the wheelchair. Just the jostling from the lifting and carrying made my leg throb in pain. "I'll get you some of the pain meds as soon as we get inside." He turned the chair and wheeled me into the living room.

"Can you put me in the bedroom? I wanna lie down." I balled my hands into fists. My nails dug into my palms and that little distraction helped me stop thinking about how bad my life sucked at the moment.

"Sure." He turned down the hall, and pushed me through the doorway of my childhood bedroom. The shelves were covered in soccer trophies. Several ribbons and medals hung from pegs on the walls. There was a framed picture of Danny and me on the desk in the corner.

"Thanks. I'm going to take a nap." I lifted myself up and scooted onto the bed. As I lay down, Dad tucked a pillow under my foot to help cushion my leg. It pulsed in pain, reminding me of where I was. I punched my pillow before leaning against it, and then closed my eyes. I wasn't really tired, but I wanted to be alone, and I didn't want to see this shrine to a life I might not ever have again.

I must have fallen asleep because it was dark out. "Ava? Are you awake?" Madi's soft voice was muffled through the door. "You have a visitor."

"I'm up." I sounded terrible, even to myself. I pushed myself to a sitting position just as the door opened. Ashley was standing there with flowers in her hand, biting her lip.

"How are you doing? That was stupid; I can see life sucks. How are you feeling? God, I'm terrible at this. I brought these." She thrust the flowers at me.

"Were you planning my funeral or something?" I teased. "You can come in."

She moved a little closer, but still kept her distance. "I don't want to hurt you." She stared at the giant cast.

"You won't. Sit." I patted the bed beside me.

She slowly lowered herself right on the edge. "What'd the doctor say?"

"It's gonna be at least six months." I picked at a thread on the bedspread. "You better not let them replace me."

"Are you insane? You could never be replaced." She scoffed as she slapped at the bed. When she realized that she almost hit my knee, she recoiled. "I'm so sorry."

"It's cool. You didn't hurt me." I brushed her off. "Please tell me we won," I begged.

She nodded. "In double overtime. Guess your mom's record's going to stand, huh?"

I had completely forgotten about that. "Yep. I won't be a student next year. This was my last chance, and now I won't be able to play until after the season is over." That was one more piece of defeat that I didn't need to be reminded of. "I hate my life right now," I grumbled.

"It's not all bad." Ashley tried to cheer me up. "You get to have someone take care of you." She smiled as she waved her arm around.

"Yeah, but I'm living in this shrine to soccer right now, and it's the reason I'm in this predicament. I'm kinda angry and I need a place to sulk." I pouted.

"I think you'll feel different in a few days." She leaned over and hugged me. "What did Danny say about all of this?"

"Nothing. He won't call me back." I rolled my eyes. "I thought when I told him I'd had surgery that he'd at least call, but nope."

"Screw him." She stood, hands on her hips. "You need to dump his ass. He doesn't deserve you."

"We both know how you feel about him. Can we please not talk about him right now?"

"Fine." She rolled her eyes. Deep down, I knew her feelings were justified, but I just couldn't face them.

"Why don't you sign my cast?" I pointed over at my desk. "There should be some markers in the drawer."

Ashley marched over to the desk, and squealed in delight. "We are going to pretty this thing up." She clapped as she lifted a pack of multicolored Sharpies from the drawer. She skipped back over to the bed, and carefully sat down. "What color should I start with?" She held them in front of me.

"Blue. I like blue." I laughed.

She made a funny face as she removed the cap and leaned down. After a few seconds, she sat back to admire her signature. It scrolled along my calf. She then proceeded to make little flowers around her name in all the other colors in the pack. "There." She smiled with pride. "I'll get the rest of the girls over here soon. You'll have the prettiest leg on the team." She clapped before slipping the cap back on her marker.

"Thanks. It does look better." I admired her work. It still hurt like hell to really move any, but the flowers and her bubbly script helped in a way.

"I'll be back later this week when I have a break. You, get some rest so we can get back on the field. I need someone kicking my ass on the daily." She grinned as she stood.

"Thanks, Ash. You always know what to say. I'm sorry it's going to be so lonely without me there."

"I got that covered." She winked as my phone started ringing. When I looked at the screen it was a Facetime, from her. "Answer it." She giggled.

"Hey." I clicked on the screen. "What are you up to?"

"I'm heading home from a friend's." She grinned on the screen. "I'll call you back." She disconnected and then stuffed her phone in her pocket before looking back to me. "I can Facetime whenever, and then you are there with me."

"You are too much." I laughed.

"Maybe" —she shrugged— "but I got you laughing, so I did my job. I'll call you later." She did a little finger wave before leaving.

As the door closed, I reached over for the pain pills and after swallowing two, I slid down, and let my eyes drift closed. It was the first time since getting home that I didn't feel like breaking something.