Prologue

H e's gorgeous.

That was the first thought I ever had about Kellan Cooper.

The second was that he was way out of my league. I never imagined he would ever give me the time of day, but then he sat next to me in math class.

It was a simple question.

Do you have a pencil I can borrow?

Seems silly now to think he was this larger-than-life figure that I couldn't talk to. Now we talk nearly every day. He texts me funny memes he finds and often has lunch with me. He's brought me from my little world into his big one with all his popular friends.

Most of the girls don't like me, but I don't care. I don't need them to. I only need him.

For two years, since freshman year, I have sat on the sidelines and watched him flirt and date his way through many of the girls in not only our grade but the ones above and below.

This year is going to be my year, though, and I'm going to finally admit my feelings for him. Hopefully, the little signs he's been giving me means that he feels the same way about me.

Like when he touched my thigh the other day while driving. I mean, he did break pretty hard, but he still reached out to touch me. He didn't have to.

Or the way he brushed the hair off my face this morning. It was such an intimate gesture.

I look up at him as he practices at the local rink. This is where the high school team holds all of its practices. I've spent more time here than I have anywhere else.

I pretend it's because I need the ride, but really, I like spending time with him. He's my best friend.

I only hope that we can be like a fairy-tale novel and become more.

I go back to reading my book, waiting for him to finish up. I'm so engrossed that I don't even realize when he drops into the seat next to me, shaking his hair to hit me with the water still clinging to it.

"Ah. Really?" I cover my face.

It's too late, though. My glasses are covered in little water droplets. I take them off, cleaning them on my shirt.

"Sorry, Gracie. I couldn't resist. You looked so cute sitting there reading." He nudges my shoulder.

My stomach erupts with butterflies as my cheeks burn. This is what I mean. He has to like me.

Right?

"You ready to go home?" he asks.

I bite my bottom lip as I look up at him.

How do I do this?

He tilts his head a little as his eyes drop to my lips.

I suck in a breath and let it pour out of me.

"I really like you, and if you like me too, I think we should date."

It all comes out at once. I'm not even sure he understood what I said. With the way he is frozen, staring at me, I'm sure he didn't.

Oh god. I can't say it again. My eyes start to burn. I don't want to cry in front of him.

Then he speaks.

"Gracie, I do. I like you so much. You're my best friend."

My heart starts racing, but then I see it. The way his face falls.

"I don't want to ruin our friendship. We are still in high school. Relationships that start in high school rarely succeed. I would hate myself if that happened to us. Do you get what I'm saying?"

I feel the small splinter in my heart. He doesn't want to be my boyfriend.

Is this what the friend zone feels like?

"Of course. It was a stupid idea," I blurt out as I stand and turn to face away from him.

My eyes start to water, and my throat feels like it's going to close up.

"Grace." He stands, putting his hand on my shoulder.

I shake him off and push back my emotions. "I just need to use the restroom. Meet you by the car?"

I don't wait for his answer. I take off running to the bathroom. It was a stupid idea. Of course, he wouldn't want me. I'm plain Jane. The girl next door. I'm nothing like the bombshells he's used to.

I let the tears fall for a few moments before I suck in several breaths, willing them away.

It only takes five minutes for me to get myself back under control. I splash water on my face, hoping the redness fades.

I don't want to lose Kellan either. So for him, I will be his friend. I will push all of these feelings down until they no longer exist.

By the time I make it back to the car, Kellan is waiting, looking worried. His hair is all out of place as if he'd been running his hands through it. One of his telltale signs that he is stressed.

"Gracie," he starts, but I shake my head.

"You're right. We are better off as friends. Take me home?" I ask.

"We should talk about this. Maybe in the future—"

I cut him off. "I don't need you to placate me like you do the others. I get it. You're my best friend. Nothing will ever change that. Can we drop this now? It's embarrassing me."

He stares at me for a long moment before he nods.

"Of course."

I let him open the door of his car for me before I slide in. Then he walks around the car, getting in the driver's seat.

Then he pats my knee twice.

How wrong I was about that touch. Every touch, really.

"I love you, Gracie Bear."

"Me too, Kell Bell." I force a smile before I curl into myself, angling away from him.

I'll be okay.

I have to be.

I have no other choice.