21. Lana

21

LANA

I stare at Henry, trying to process everything he's telling me. Part of me wants to believe him so badly. The way he looks at me, the sincerity in his voice, it all feels real. But how can I trust him after what just happened? I can still feel that cop pressing his dick into me, the lewd threats he made. Not to mention the humiliation of being cuffed in front of my employees. It helps ward off the desire to believe him.

"You've claimed before that you were looking into Lazaro's case. But you haven't given me anything concrete. Not a single piece of real evidence."

Henry opens his mouth to speak, but I hold up a hand, cutting him off.

"No, let me finish. You say you've been investigating, but all I've gotten are vague promises and now, conveniently, some ideas you have for finding the van. The van I was the one who told the police about. It's awfully thin."

"I haven't been able to follow up yet. I got the call to come here—" He stops short as if he realizes how lame that excuse is.

"Right. Another convenience. You can't investigate my brother because you need to publicly humiliate me first."

"Lana, please." Henry takes a step closer, making me wish I'd sat behind my desk, not defiantly stood in front of it. His nearness does things to me that make me weak.

"I had nothing to do with today. I'm as angry about it as you are," he finishes.

"I can't afford to believe you."

Henry runs a hand through his hair, frustration evident on his face. "I know how it looks, but I swear to you, I'm not playing you. What happened in there was wrong, and I'll make sure those officers are held accountable."

I search his face, looking for any sign of deception. But all I see is earnestness… or maybe it's wishful thinking on my part. I can't trust my own judgment around him anymore.

"I don't know what to believe." I hate how vulnerable I sound, and that makes me angry. I lift my chin, showing him that he can't manipulate me. "I'm sticking to my belief that this is all just a game to you, a way to get information on my family."

The hurt in Henry's eyes looks genuine, but I can't let myself be swayed. Not again. I've been fooled too many times, and the stakes are too high.

Henry takes a step closer, his eyes pleading. "I know how it looks, but I'm telling you the truth. I want to find out what happened to Lazaro. For you, Lana."

I laugh bitterly. "For me? This is how you show you care about me?" I'm desperate to protect myself from the dangerous hope he's stirring in me. "I'm not falling for it anymore. I won't help you put me or my family in prison."

Henry's hand on my cheek sends a jolt through my body. His touch is gentle, almost reverent, and without knowing it, I lean into it.

"The last thing I want is to see you imprisoned." His voice is low and intense. "Haven't you been listening to me at all? Do you really think everything between us has been a lie?"

I want to pull away, to maintain the walls I've been working so hard to keep erected in this exchange. But Henry's eyes hold mine, and my defenses start crumbling.

"I…" My words catch in my throat.

"Tell me, Lana." Henry's thumb brushes my cheek. "Do you feel anything for me? Anything at all?"

As I stand there, caught in Henry's gaze, I'm forced to confront the truth. There is something more than just my hoping to get information from him. Something that terrifies me with its intensity.

"I don't know what I feel." It's not a lie, but it's not the whole truth, either. I do feel something for Henry, something that goes beyond physical attraction.

His smile is soft, even sweet. "Yes, you do. You feel this too, I know you do. I know that you're afraid to feel it, just like I am. But pretending it isn't there won't make it stop."

I close my eyes, overwhelmed by the conflicting emotions surging through me. When I open them again, I see the vulnerability in Henry's expression, mirroring my own.

"Whether I feel something or not, it doesn't matter. I can't trust it… trust you. Not after what just happened."

"It does matter, Lana. It matters the most." He moves even closer, too close. His gaze drops to my lips, and I know he's going to kiss me. I should push him away. Slap him. But I don't. Instead, when his lips touch mine, warm and insistent, I melt into him. I kiss him back, my hands sliding up to tangle in his hair. All the tension and anger from earlier dissolves, replaced by a desperate need to be closer to him.

"Tell me you believe me," he murmurs against my lips.

"I want to. God help me, I really do."

"I'll take that, for now." His hands wrap around me, holding me close as his lips consume mine in a kiss that sets my whole body on fire. For a brief moment, I let myself get lost in the heat of the moment, needing this to steady my nerves.

His hands wander, exploring my body, making me ache for more of his touch. My fingers clench in the fabric of his shirt, holding him to me as if our lives depend on it.

Without breaking the kiss, Henry backs me up against my desk, his hands sliding up my legs as lifts the skirt of my dress. Setting me on the desk, he steps between my thighs.

"Henry, we shouldn't?—"

"I know. From the moment I saw you, I knew you were trouble, but I can't seem to care."

That about sums up how I'm feeling too. The warning bells continue to chime, but I ignore them as Henry's touch grows more insistent.

"Tell me to stop if you want, Lana. I will." His lips trail along my neck, sending delicious sensation through me.

"I don't want to stop… I just wonder if we should."

He lifts his head, his eyes full of passion as he looks at me. "I imagine we should. But I'd give my?—"

"Left nut?" I ask, remembering his comment from before.

He nods with a soft laugh as he brushes my hair over my shoulder. "Yes. God, Lana… you make me want… I fucking ache with it."

I'd always thought I was stronger than to fall for such words. But I'm not. They make me feel desired in a way I've never felt before.

Henry's teeth scrape against my neck, sending shivers of pleasure coursing through me. "I need to be inside you, Lana."

I reach for his belt buckle, fumbling to get it undone along with the button and zipper of his slacks. I free his dick, stroking it.

"Fuck." He groans against my skin. He tugs my panties down and grips my hips. "I wish we had more time… and a bed."

Before I can respond, he thrusts inside me. Like a tidal wave, pleasure flows through me. I hold on to him, wrapping my legs around his hips. His touch is electrifying, igniting a fire deep within me that only he can. He's everything I shouldn't want, yet I can't resist him. He's demolished my carefully built control, exposing the vulnerable side of me. And I'm letting him.

As Henry's tongue sweeps into my mouth, I lose myself in the sensation, giving in to the need that burns between us. It's intense, overwhelming, but I welcome it with open arms. I cling to him, my fingers digging into his shoulders as he moves inside me. He's frenetic, moving fast, hard, sending me careening toward pleasure.

"Fuck, baby… I can't wait." He growls as his dick pistons in and out of me.

"Don't wait. Now, Henry. Oh, God. I'm coming." I hit the pinnacle and soar into wonderous bliss.

"Yes," he calls out, slamming into me and grinding as warmth fills me.

And when it's done, he holds me, his dick still inside me, his face in my neck. The moment feels charged with emotion. It terrifies me even as it makes me feel loved in a way I've never been before.

He lifts his head, his eyes searching mine. "Are you okay?"

I have no idea, actually. "I'm still… unsure."

"About me?"

"About all of this. We can't ignore the reality of our situation."

Henry rests his forehead against mine. "I know. But I can't let you go. I want to be with you for as long as you'll have me."

His words send a shiver through me, equal parts excitement and fear. I want to give in, to let myself fall into this without reservation. But the pragmatic part of me, the part still reeling from the search of my office this morning, can't be silenced so easily.

"And what happens when duty calls? When you're faced with a choice between me and your job, as happened today?"

Henry's expression is as helpless as I feel. "I can promise that I'll always be honest with you. That I'll do everything in my power to protect you."

"Protect me? Even if you think I've broken the law?"

"I want to be with you, Lana." He says it matter-of-factly. There's almost a hopeless tone to it. Like he has no choice but to want me.

The truth is that I want to be with him too. But can I trust him? Can I afford to let my guard down, even for a moment? The stakes are too high, the risks too great. One wrong move, and everything my family has built could come crashing down.

I should distance myself from Henry, cut all ties before things get too complicated. But the thought of never seeing him again, never feeling his arms around me… it leaves an ache in my chest.

He leans in and kisses me. "You really do have me by the short hairs."

I laugh, happy to have the intensity of the moment broken, even if this situation isn't resolved.

He picks up my panties, handing them to me, then re-fastens his pants. When his clothes are back in place, he looks at me.

"I'm going to deal with what happened today, and then I'll follow up on the van."

I nod, realizing I have no choice but to trust him. My heart doesn't seem to give me the choice.

He lets out a breath. "I can call later, or you can come?—"

"In light of today, maybe we shouldn't be in a position where we'll be seen together."

He sucks in a breath but nods. "Okay, but not too long, Lana. I'm addicted."

I straighten his tie. "Worried about withdrawals?"

He nods. "I'm feeling the loss already."

Words like that are my downfall. What woman doesn't like to hear a man confess how much he needs her, wants her?

He kisses me again and then exits my office. For a moment, I sit on the edge of my desk. I feel a little bit like I've been through a tornado, my emotions whipped up, tossed about. As much as I want to give in to everything Henry seems to want, like him, I still have a job.

I slip off my desk and go to sit behind it. I pick up my phone and call Elio to explain everything that happened. Of course, I leave out the part about the dickhead cop, because I don't want Elio to kill him and bring more attention to the family. I also fail to mention having sex with Detective Lutz on my desk, for obvious reasons.

Elio's response is what I expect. Rage.

I assure him all is under control now. When we hang up, though, I'm worried about what he might do.