Chapter 31

McKenzie

Isit up in bed, covered in sweat. That day is so clear in my mind now. How sad and lonely I was. How badly I wanted Phoenix to admit he loved me. I glance over at his side of the bed, but he's not there. I fell asleep on his chest. When did he wake up? How did I not feel him get up? Glancing at the clock, I realize it's four in the morning. It feels like we just went to sleep.

Stepping out into the hallway, I glance toward his upstairs office, but the light isn't on, so I walk downstairs and go to the kitchen. He isn't in here either, so I grab a bottle of water out of the fridge and walk down the hallway to the library and his downstairs office. He isn't in any of those rooms either.

Walking further to the theater room, I don't see him, so I turn back around and head to the other side of the house. He's probably in the gym. There's another hallway next to the one that leads to Anna's room. Walking down that hallway, I hear the thumping sound of Nix hitting the punching bag. Stopping inside the gym, I lean against the door and watch as he lands blow after blow to the punching bag.

He's like a moving work of art. He's in shorts, so every tattoo he has is on display. The tattoos along his thighs, arms, and shoulders ripple with each punch and bounce. I lick my lips and push away from the doorway, walking further into the room. I'm only wearing the T-shirt I put on when I went to bed and I'm very much aware of it now. The edge of his shirt stops mid thigh. When he spots me, he grabs the bag so it stops swinging and stares at me as I walk toward him.

His shoulders move as he catches his breath. He doesn't speak as I get closer to him; his hooded eyes rake over me. When his eyes connect with mine again, the blue of his eyes is barely visible. He holds onto the punching bag like it's the only thing keeping him from launching across the room to me.

If it were any other night, he wouldn't stop himself, but because of everything that happened tonight and what I remembered about Bill, he's holding himself back. I don't want him to. Yes, what I remembered was terrible. But in my head, I can separate him from what happened to me. I know he would never hurt me. Never.

I want to tell him about the memory I had. The one I've had glimpses of for months now, but that was the full memory. I'm sure Dr. Chamberland was working with his mother even then and talked us back into going to the house. I remember Nix telling me we were downtown when I was taken, but why wouldn't Clyde tell him he drove me home?

Unless Clyde was in on it, too. "What's wrong?" he asks. He's still gripping the bag. I take another step toward him.

"I woke up, and you weren't there. I had to come find you."

His eyes fill with concern. "Did you have a memory? I should have been there." He exhales sharply. "I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep."

"It's okay," I assure him. "I did have a memory." He takes a step toward me. "But I don't want to talk about that right now." I stop in front of him and tilt my head to look up at him.

"What do you want?" His voice is rough and deep. He sees what I want in my eyes, but he wants me to say it.

"I believe you promised me an orgasm."

He smirks at me. Finally releasing the bag, he wraps his arms around my waist and lifts me up, my feet dangling as he kisses me. He puts his hand on my ass encouraging me to wrap my legs around him. When I do, the T-shirt lifts and my bare pussy presses against his abdomen. He sucks in a breath and leans back, breaking the kiss.

"No panties?"

I give him a sly smile. "I was exhausted when we went to sleep." Before I can think, he drops to his knees and he leans forward until my back is on the mat. He pushes the T-shirt up until it's bunched up under my arms. His hands cup my breasts as his thumbs circle my nipples.

His cock is hard and peeks out slightly from his workout shorts. If he moves just right, it will slide out enough for me to see his piercing, but he doesn't move. Frustrated, I lift my legs and grab the hem of his shorts between my toes and pull. He chuckles, but doesn't stop me. I sigh when I see his piercing.

He releases my breasts and grabs his cock. He stares down at me as he takes the head of his cock and rubs his piercing through my pussy lips. I hiss and jerk. "You love this piercing, don't you?" I nod as he continues to rub himself along my slit.

He smiles at me and pulls away. I huff in frustration and he laughs. "Roll over and get on all fours." I swallow, trying to wet my dry throat and do as he says. I expect him to take me from behind, but he surprises me when he lays down and pushes back until his face is below me.

I glance down at him through my arms. "What—" I'm cut off when he leans up and swipes his tongue through my folds.

"Sit on my face, love."

I push up from the floor so I'm kneeling above him. I hesitate, so he wraps his arms around my thighs and pulls me toward his face. I sit and he devours me. His hands cup my ass as he thrusts his tongue inside me. I tilt my head back, knowing I won't last long. He uses long strokes, licking from my pussy to my clit over and over again. Before I know it, I'm riding his tongue.

I grip his hair as he encourages me to let loose, and I do. Noises I didn't know I could make leaving my throat. We're far enough away from Anna's room, so I don't think she'll be able to hear us, which is good because at this point I don't care. He inserts one finger, then two, and crooks them enough so he's rubbing against my g-spot. I squeeze my eyes shut so tight I see stars as I come undone.

Falling forward on my hands, he doesn't wait long to climb out from under me. He kneels behind me and lays his chest on my back. "Are you sure?" he asks, his cock teasing my entrance. Checking in with me one more time and I love him even more for it.

"Yes. Yes I'm sure."

He doesn't wait a moment longer as he enters me in one swift move. I gasp at how full he makes me and I buck against him when he doesn't move right away. He wraps his hand around my throat, touching the collar that's there. I don't remember him putting it back on me after we got out of the shower.

"I put it back on you before I came down here." He answers my thoughts like he can read my mind. "Open your eyes." I open my eyes and come face to face with us in the mirror. Part of me wants to look away because it's uncomfortable looking at myself completely on display, but when I see the look on Nix's face, it makes me pause.

His eyes are heated with desire as he looks at us in the mirror. His other arm comes around my waist and his hand snakes down to cup my pussy. He pulls out and pushes back into me, his breathing hard in my ear. "So fucking sexy," he murmurs in my ear as his middle finger circles my clit.

I'm still sensitive from the orgasm he gave me just a few minutes ago, but I already feel another one building. I buck against him, meeting each of his thrusts and begin to close my eyes, but he clicks his tongue at me. "Keep your eyes on the mirror, love." I open my eyes and watch. Taking in the way he watches me, how he looks over my shoulder every once in a while to see how flushed I am.

His thrusts become choppy, and I know he's close. He pushes me down again so I'm on all fours and grips my hips. "So beautiful." Thrust. "So fucking sexy." Thrust. "Mine." Thrust. I watch him in the mirror and his eyes bore into mine as he speaks to me, reminding me who I am and whose I am. "I love everything about you." Thrust. "Your mind." Thrust. "Your body." Thrust. "Your heart."

Tears begin to stream down my face. "I will always choose you," he promises, and I come again with a shout and a sob. He comes with me and after a few moments, we both collapse onto the mat. He rolls over onto his back and pulls me onto his chest. Kissing my forehead, my cheek, my shoulder, anything he can touch.

I look up at him and smile. "I love you and I'll always choose you, too." We seal our vows to each other with a kiss and he carries me back to our bed.