Peony

Today was hell. School started up again and the guys weren’t there. Like, I knew they wouldn’t be, but knowing it and experiencing it first hand are totally different. The hallways seemed different without them. I was different.

Alone.

I should have made more friends. Two years is going to be a long time with no one to talk to or sit with. I probably could have managed to get through the day if I had the guys to fall back on during the evenings and weekends, but it’s still been total radio silence from them which hurts way more than I want to consider.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, it’s only two days until the dreaded dinner with The General. I know my mum and Mrs Montgomery will be there, but he still makes me feel so uncomfortable. I really don’t want to go, but my mum has insisted. I tried asking her if I could be excused but without a valid reason why, she said no.

I can’t even feign sickness on the day – not that I would have to pretend, my stomach is in knots and I feel sick already – but my mum will think it’s too coincidental that I’m too ill to go when I tried to get out of it.

I’ll just have to do everything in my power to keep my distance from him and make sure we don’t end up alone.

Alone.

That’s funny.

A minute ago I was wishing I wasn’t so alone, but now, thinking of what’s to come at the weekend, I’d rather it.