10. Riley

Chapter 10

Riley

D anny's words nagged at me all the way up the stairs.

" If you were having sex with me, you wouldn't even realise anyone was knocking at the door. "

Obviously, he was right. Unfortunately for me, I hadn't forgotten how good Danny was in bed. If it hadn't been for my most recent hookup, I might have believed I'd never experience sex like it again.

No, it was why he'd said it that was bugging me. For five years, neither of us had brought up the fact that we'd hooked up other than as a daft joke. But this was the second comment Danny had made in recent weeks. Comments that made it sound like he'd been thinking about it, in ways he definitely shouldn't be.

The last two weeks had been…weird. I'd almost missed it, what with work being a pain in my arse as usual. Danny and I had hung out, carrying on as we usually would.

But there was an undercurrent of something that hadn't been there before. I'd caught him staring at me from the corner of my eye, studying me almost. He'd been quieter than usual too, often seeming miles away.

The weirdest thing was his bones. Every now and then, there'd be an audible cracking noise, the same one I'd hear before he shifted. His form didn't change though. Danny would just grit his teeth before assuring me that everything was fine.

I was starting to think that was a lie. Everything wasn't fine. Something was wrong, and Danny wasn't being honest with me.

Shit had been so weird between us that I almost hadn't expected him to show tonight. I knew it had been selfish of me to ask him, but I needed him here. If I wanted to let myself fully go like I had last time, I had to know Danny was close by. That he could protect me if needed.

My stomach churned as I stripped and lay face down on the bed. Maybe tonight was a mistake. Did I really want to go through with this knowing something was going on with Danny? Or should I ignore it and wait until he was ready to open up? That was my general approach with Danny, but it hadn't got me very far. I still had no idea what drove him to despair every September.

Perhaps I never would.

I tugged the pillow close while the uncertainty over what to do roiled within me. Should I call this off and try and go downstairs to get Danny to talk? Or ignore it and hope all the weirdness went away on its own?

A large, warm hand touched my back, making me startle. Fuck, I hadn't even heard the guy come in. He ran his hand down my spine, encouraging my tense muscles to relax.

I'll talk to Danny after, I resolved, biting back a moan as the stranger got to my glutes. I'm probably overthinking.

I thought he'd maybe go straight in, but like my last hookup, this one seemed content to take his time. Stroking me in long, languid strokes, he worked my back and glutes until I was a puddle on the sheets.

My cock was throbbing in time with my pulse when he finally touched my hole. His cool fingers worked me open even further, slowly fucking me until I was taking three fingers.

Awareness began to prickle at the base of my neck. These touches felt familiar. Too familiar. Was this the same man as last time?

It can't be, I told myself. It was a whole different profile. Why would he lie?

That was a good point. Everyone on the app wanted one-time-only anonymous hookups. It didn't make sense that someone would go to the trouble of creating a second account just to get another go at my arse.

Even if it was a spectacular arse.

He crooked his fingers, brushing against the sensitive gland, and I forgot my concerns. My logical thinking was wiped away by my base need. And that need was to get him inside me.

Right now.

A sigh of relief left me as I felt the rubber covered head of his cock push against my hole. His size had me moaning while alarm bells went off in my mind, louder this time. He sank a few inches deeper and I knew it without a shadow of a doubt.

I'd definitely been split open by this cock before.

I tensed, not sure what to do. Should I let him continue? Turn my head and confront him? Or should I call Danny?

I was still debating when he made his first thrust. A strangled cry was ripped from my throat as pleasure raced through me.

I'm not proud of what happened next. Did I do anything about my suspicions?

No. I did absolutely fuck all.

I lay there and let my hookup rail me. I didn't turn my head. I didn't call out for Danny. I just held on to that pillow like a lifeline, my eyes rolling back in my head as he fucked me hard. His big hands were wrapped around my hips. He'd left bruises last time, and god, I hoped he did this time too.

My cock was bouncing against my stomach, but I needed something more. I needed him to touch me.

I didn't lift my head, not trusting myself to not speak. "Touch me, please. Please ."

His rhythm faltered for a second before his hand wrapped around my cock. He hadn't stopped to get lube, but I was leaking so much precum that it wasn't an issue.

I pictured how we might look. Me face down, arse up, him crowding close behind me. I knew he was big, much bigger than me. He was dressed too, just like last time.

It's not the same person, I reassured myself. Picture someone else.

A familiar pair of light blue eyes appeared, crinkled at the corners. A pair of dimples I wanted to lick. A cocky grin that hinted at danger. Strong, capable hands that knew exactly how to touch me. His head thrown back, tendons stretching in his neck as he came.

My own orgasm hit me, catching me by surprise. I screamed into the pillow, picturing him behind me the whole time. Him thrusting to the hilt before coming on a quiet grunt. I pictured him pulling out, stroking almost reverently down my back before leaving the room without a word.

I was alone when I finally lifted my head from the pillow. Silence was everywhere, but not in my head. No, my brain was screaming in confusion and disbelief.

Had I really just orgasmed while imagining my best friend?

I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened. Both that I'd apparently had sex with the same man again, and that I'd imagined it was Danny behind me.

What the fuck was wrong with me? Was it because my hookup was roughly the same size as my best friend? Or because he touched me in a similar way to how Danny had all those years ago?

Whatever it was, it couldn't happen again. Once I'd cleaned myself up, I marched downstairs to confront Danny. To ask him if it was the same man as last time. Why had he let him upstairs if that were the case?

But when I got downstairs, the house was empty. A gust of air had me going through to the kitchen. For some reason, the door was wide open, like someone had stormed out in a rush.

My stomach twisted with shame and guilt. Fuck, I shouldn't have gone through with it. I'd known Danny was dealing with something, but I'd put myself first anyway. What kind of best friend did that? What kind of person thought about getting off instead of what someone they cared for was going through?

A fucking selfish one, that's who.

Sighing, I closed the back door. At least that explained how the same man had been here twice. Danny must've left before he'd arrived, slipping out the back door so as not to see him. But why?

He had to be mad at me. He'd asked me repeatedly not to do this, and I hadn't listened. Worse, I'd continued doing it while suspecting something was going on with him.

Add in the fact that I'd also fantasised about him?

Yeah, I was a twat.

Well, no more. I was going to make things right between us. I was going to get him back over here and get to the bottom of whatever was going on with him.

I wasn't losing Danny. If he thought he could run from me, from whatever was going on with us, he was in for a fucking rude awakening.

O ver the past fourteen days, Danny had had sixty-three missed calls from me.

One hundred and twelve unanswered texts.

Seventeen voicemails.

And I was now on my third unannounced visit.

Needy? Moi? No, I prefer stubborn.

Some people would think I was overreacting, but I didn't give a fuck what anyone else thought. I'd ignored the signs that something was going on with him, and now he'd retreated. As soon as I'd seen that open door, I knew he was running. He never left my place without saying goodbye. Add in that he'd left while I was hooking up with a stranger?

Something was going on. Something bad. Something he wanted to hide from me.

Nobody knew better than I did how Danny would burrow into himself when confronted with something he didn't want to deal with. He covered everything with easy smiles and flirtatious banter.

He couldn't do that with me though…which was probably why he was avoiding me.

As I'd expected, I opened the door to his house to find it empty. When I'd been here two days ago, I'd put a bottle in front of the back door—the one Danny always used. A quick check showed it was still there, upright and in the exact same spot.

"For fuck's sake, Danny." I kicked the leg of his kitchen table. Pain ricocheted up my foot, making me hop around indignantly. "Now I've hurt myself too, and it's all your fault."

Stalking over to his sofa, I dropped down in a huff. Pulling my glasses off, I rubbed at the bridge of my nose. I'd barely slept this week—a combination of my sucky job and Danny avoiding me. This was the longest we'd not spoken since the day we'd met.

And it was driving me fucking crazy.

I knew enough about wards to know Danny knew I was here. His, like several of the others', were spelled to alert him when someone crossed them.

It made him ignoring me all the more infuriating.

Pulling out my phone, I scrolled through all the unanswered texts. I'd tried everything from pretending everything was normal to outright asking what was wrong. He'd ignored all my invitations to hang out. I'd gone from begging to anger and back again, but nothing had got a response.

Worse still, I wasn't the only one he was avoiding. I'd half expected him to miss book club, but to not turn up to Leo's birthday dinner?

That was bang out of order…and it had me worrying more than ever before. What had spooked Danny so much that he was cutting all of us out?

I knew Leo was frustrated too. Unlike me though, he still saw Danny at work. Apparently he was being as silent with Leo as he was with me, giving him a lame excuse as to why he hadn't been at his birthday.

My gaze landed on the final message I'd sent, mere hours ago.

please, just tell me what I've done wrong

I dropped the phone, slumping down in my seat. Memories of the silent treatment from my mum swarmed me. Trying desperately to get her to open up. To seek help. To tell me something, anything .

It was one of the reasons why I didn't want a relationship, yet here I was, doing it anyway. Fucking Danny and his piss-poor communication issues. What was his problem? Didn't he realise how this was affecting me? Did he care about me so little that he could cut me out of his life without a second thought?

Anger began to eat away at the fear. Snatching up my phone, I typed out another message.

do I need to set your house on fire? Because I'm one more unanswered message away from doing it. Istg, Danny.

My heart leapt into my throat as the little ‘read' text appeared. Little bubbles danced on the screen. I chewed at my lip, tapping the sides of the device as I waited for a response.

Danny

don't set my house on fire, I don't have insurance

what kind of fucking idiot doesn't have insurance?

this kind, apparently

Pulling up a different group chat, my thumbs flew over the screen.

if I set Danny's house on fire, can anyone loan me the money for repairs? He doesn't have insurance…

Harlow

yes

Sebastian

yes

Dagon

want me to start it for you? Saves on the matches and I can make it hella dramatic

Mori

don't let Dagon start it, he'll set the whole street alight

Mori

but yes, I will also bankroll this

Cal

what kind of twat doesn't have insurance?

Toby

Riley, don't set anything on fire. What's wrong?

Matty

Riley, call me. Now.

My phone started buzzing before I could even respond. Disappointment clogged my throat. It was one of my best friends, but not the one I wanted to hear from.

Bracing myself for the inevitable lecture, I hit answer. "Hey, Matty."