11. Crew

11

Crew

" T his is dry." I hand her a clean shirt from the pocket of my saddle. It stays packed because I never know when I'm going to get stuck up in the pastures. The thought of it being handy for other reasons never crossed my mind.

She shucks from her wet shirt and if I wasn't worked up before I am now. All the muscles in her body are cold and taut beneath her skin. Including her nipples that poke through the light bra she's wearing and it makes me feel unrestrained as my body reacts to the sight.

"Eyes up here, Cassidy," she mocks me and it brings a smile to my face.

For a moment there I thought I'd destroyed what bridge we'd built between us. The taste of her lips burns against mine and if she'd let me, I'd do it again a thousand times. The feeling of her body and how it slots against mine as she pushes back for more of me flickers across my skin.

She shrugs into the shirt and it drops over her frame and around her thighs as she kicks off her wet jeans and attempts to wring them out. When she's satisfied with the job she sighs, wiggling uncomfortably as she tries to remove the wet bra without taking everything off in the middle of the forest.

"Here." I step toward her and she freezes, dropping her hands.

Logan lets me get closer and I slip my hand beneath the hem of the shirt, ghosting my fingers over her skin toward the clasp of her bra and flick it loose before backing away.

"Thank you," she says and that's the most surprising thing that's happened all morning.

The gratitude feels more like an omission than anything; a truce maybe? I'm not sure but I like the way she's looking at me now. Her fire still burns but it doesn't burn with the intention to maim, it cracks and flickers with the intention to keep warm.

"Now what?" She throws her hands on her hips and I laugh at the sight. The t-shirt too big, her long legs and scowly face. "I don't have pants or a horse!"

I laugh harder.

"Stop laughing at me," she pouts, it's so angry and adorable it only makes my temperature rise. "It's not funny."

"It's a little funny." I stop though because I can see her growing more upset.

My jeans are the least muddy article of clothing and I shuck them back on before shoving all the other wet, dirty fabric into the saddle bag. I'll hang them up at our next stop, all I had to do now was convince Logan Shepard to get on a horse with me.

"You can ride Juniper with me," I say and brace for impact.

"Sounds like an excuse to get your hands on me, grizzly bear."

A few damp locks of her hair fall around her neck from the rough pony tail she's pulled her hair into and it makes me wanna kiss her there, where the smell of her skin tangles with the smell of her shampoo.

"Well it's that or you walk." I look over the horse at her as she contemplates her options. "There are real grizzly bears up here Logan, ones who don't care how pretty you are. You're still prey."

Her eyes flicker back to mine and the corners of her mouth turn up. "Pretty, hey?"

"Real pretty," I say a little quieter this time so she can feel how serious I am. "Now get your ass on the horse, Shepard."

I help her on, careful not to help too much as she shimmies forward on the saddle to give me room to join her. My thighs eclipse hers and I wrap my hand around her stomach to grab the reins, settling my hand against her with them between my fingers.

"Is this okay?" I ask her feeling her tremble at the smallest contact.

"Yes," she whines a little and I can't help but lean into the sound. "I'm just cold."

"We can head back," I offer.

"I'm not riding back to the ranch with no pants on, Cassidy," she says as she settles back against me, stealing the heat from my body.

I chuckle. With everything going on it had been a few days since I had been out this way anyway but now was as good a time as any to check on the cabin. "I know a place we can go."

She turns her head to look at me. "That's not the ranch?"

"It's not the ranch," I confirm. Her eyes narrow on me for a moment before she turns back around.

"Fine, as long as it involves getting warm."

I spin Juniper around in a circle and head back down toward a narrow path that leads to the furthest point of the property line. The trees grow thicker the further we climb down the hill and eventually the tiny weathered cabin came into view, surrounded by overgrown bushes, and with shabby broken shutters in desperate need of paint sitting lopsided in their frames.

The glass in the windows is broken and the front door doesn't close all the way but it's the one place on the ranch that feels like mine. Tattered and falling apart or not.

"What is this place?" Shepard asks me as I bring Juniper to a stop and slide down from the saddle.

I wrap both hands around her hips as she turns to hop down off the horse. I lower her to the ground, keeping her steady and close to my chest as she finds her footing. I look over the house and back to her, pushing a rogue piece of her hair behind her ear.

"It's home."

"How's that going to keep us warm, Crew? It's got more holes than it does walls."

"There's a—" the explanation dies on my lips as she walks away from me mid sentence.

I follow behind as she's careful not to tread on the wildflowers that line the dirt path toward the flimsy wooden door. I clear my throat, suddenly unable to form a proper thought as the sun catches in her eye and the breeze pushes loose hairs around her jaw.

"There's a vision," I say not entirely talking about the cabin and grab the doorknob to lift the door back onto its hinge in order to open it wide enough for her to wander inside. "It's bigger than it looks." I follow her in.

"It looks like it's been housing mice," she teases, running her finger along the back of a dusty chair that sits at a round table long abandoned by its family.

"You're awfully mouthy with chattering teeth." I walk around her and push open the door on the left. "Two rooms, kitchen, living room."

She follows my line of sight as I explain what everything will be.

"Just needs a little love," I grunt, "maybe some elbow grease."

"A lot of elbow grease," she agrees. "I thought you lived at the bunkhouse?"

I grab some paint cans from the closet, pulling them out and setting them on the floor before pulling out the stack of blankets I have stashed away for when the night creeps up on me and I can't make it back to the ranch.

"You still cold?" I wiggle the blanket out in front of her and she takes it in her fingers, wrapping it around her shoulders and snuggling down into it.

"You avoiding my question?" She asks, raising a brow at me.

I chuckle. "I like quiet," I say, moving to the small loveseat in the corner. Patting the cushions a few times gets the dust off but nothing helps the musty smell the cabin has soaked into this couch.

"That's it?"

"That's it," I say with a nod glancing at her before sitting down. The truth was, I needed the quiet. Even after so much progress and work on my mind, the night has a way of making sounds and shadows seem threatening. There are still nights when I wake in a sweat with my hands tangled in the sheets just clinging to reality as my mind battles the PTSD of the war.

Logan stares at me for a moment before plopping down next to me. The blanket is still wrapped around her and it seems to swallow up her small frame as she buries underneath it.

"So you're going full mountain man with this place?" She asks, looking over at me.

I can't help but smile at her. Logan's eyes somehow glow, even in the dimly lit cabin, and her hair has a soft wave to it from it air drying after the creek. My fingers itch to reach out and touch her again but I don't want to push her too far.

"Not entirely. I'm getting too old to be living with roommates."

It comes out more light hearted than I actually mean it. Truth is, I'm tired of all the noise. Living in the bunkhouse is like living in the barracks again and some days it's hard separating the two. I crave peace and quiet. Well, I craved it until the tornado with blue eyes sitting next to me walked onto the ranch. Now I find myself chasing the storm.

"Who knew living with a bunch of men in one confined space would be too much." She laughs softly leaning into the arm of the couch. "What's your vision for this place then?"

"My vision?" I ask, glancing around.

"Yeah, you said there was a vision." The corners of her mouth turn up slightly. "What do you want it to look like?"

She seems actually interested in what my plans are and it feels like one chink in our armor has finally straightened out.

"I want to bring it back to how it looked before," I say honestly. "At least on the outside. On the inside I want it to be modern."

"You sound like you've been watching the DIY network." She smirks.

"Do you want to know my vision or not?" I raise a brow at her but I can feel myself smiling.

She pokes her hand out of the blanket and waves it, urging me to continue.

"I don't want it to be over the top, just simple. The wood fixtures will stay but the appliances will be new." I nod, taking inventory of all of the work I still have to do on this place.

"I'm surprised you aren't turning it into a man cave."

"Do I look like a man cave sorta guy?"

"Do you really want me to answer that question?"

I laugh. "Keep it up, Shepard."

Logan grins, "What are you gonna do? Kiss me again?"

My eyes find hers and the smile on her face fades slowly and she moves to stand. I watch as the wheels turn in her head and that fire starts to burn behind her eyes again.

"Maybe we should head back?" She suggests, looking at me.

"Is that what you want?" I ask, slowly standing from the couch. She takes a step back from me as I encroach on her space.

"It is getting late."

I shake my head. "No, Shepard." My voice drops low. "Do you want me to kiss you again?"

Her lips part as if she can't decide how to answer. I take another step towards her and this time she stays put. The corner of my mouth lifts. "I won't take another step until you answer me, Logan."

"You're going to be standing there for a while then." The blanket drops from her shoulders to the floor and I take the opportunity to reach out, grabbing her wrist and tugging her into my chest for the second time today.

"That's fine with me." I smirk.

"You cheated." She pouts, looking up at me.

Her body is soft and warm in my arms as they wrap around her. Her vanilla and rose scent wafts around me. It's slowly becoming addicting but, as she rests her palms against my chest, the feel of her skin against mine wins. Logan's fingers curl into my pecs, her nails digging in ever so slightly that it sends a jolt of electricity down my spine.

"If you plan on being stubborn, I have to find ways around it."

"Man-handling me is that way?" Logan rasps and even now I can see the blue in her eyes becoming eclipsed by her pupils.

"I don't want to man-handle you, Logan." My voice is soft and thick with an emotion I don't think I've ever felt when at the same time I think, I just want to take care of you.

"Could have fooled me," she whispers.

I lean into her, ghosting my lips over hers. "Shut up, Shepard," I groan, before pressing my lips to hers.

To my surprise she doesn't pull away, instead her hands slide from my chest around to my back and I swear it sends goosebumps over my skin. Her lips part and I waste no time deepening the kiss.

One hand tangles in her hair and the other wraps around to her lower back. I hold her as close as I can to me, as if she'll disappear without a moment's notice if I don't. Knowing Logan, it's an entirely possible situation.

She whimpers and pulls back, breaking the kiss, her eyes finding mine as we try to catch our breath. "What are we doing?"

"We were kissing."

Logan shoves against my chest but I don't let her go. "I'm serious, Crew. What does this mean?"

I can almost hear the wheels squeaking in her head as she tries to figure out what's happening between us. I wish I could give her a straight answer but I'm not even sure what the hell I'm doing.

"It means you're still stubborn and I'm still trying."

She looks up at me with furrowed brows and that signature scowl. Before I can stop myself, I reach up and run the pad of my thumb over the crease in her forehead, smoothing it out until she finally relaxes.

"The cowboy and the criminal," Logan mutters under her breath.

"What?" I laugh.

"That's what they're going to call us," she says with a defeated sigh.

Her lips part to protest more but before she can I bring my mouth down over hers again. It's an attempt to drown out her doubt and I know it'll only work for the moment but despite what she believes, I meant what I said.

My fingers gently wrap around her chin, tilting her face up towards mine so I can look her straight in her blue eyes.

"Let them."