Nineteen

Ah fuck. I messed up. I messed up badly.

A look of pure shock and maybe a bit of horror flashes on Marley's face before she starts to yell at me.

"I'm your what?" she demands. "Please, tell me I heard you wrong."

"Marley." I take a step forward, glancing around. People are starting to stop and stare. "Can we go somewhere private and talk about this?"

"Nope. Not happening. We are doing this here and now. What do you mean, I'm your mate?" she growls. Now is not the time to think about how cute she looks all pissed off at me.

"It means exactly what I said. You"re my mate, Marley." My eyes flick between hers, waiting for her to say something.

"Mate. As in, like fated mates from romance books?" she asks, chest heaving in anger.

"It's not just in books." I frown. "For monsters, it's very real. And for me, you are my mate. But yes, I guess in a way it's like it might be in the books. Being around you, my emotions are heightened. In my heart and soul, you will always be the only one for me," I say nervously, hating the fact we've gained people"s attention. I wish she would just calm down and talk about this with me without yelling but I know better than to tell her that.

"So being mates is something so earth-shattering for you, yet you were still able to leave me at the end of the summer. After all the time we spent together, on top of the fact that I'm your mate!" she shouts, getting into my face.

"It wasn't easy to leave, Marley," I growl through clenched teeth, my tail whipping around behind me in anger. "You don't understand."

She huffs out a humorless laugh. "No, I guess I don't because you never gave me the chance to. How long did you know about this? Me being your mate, I mean."

My chest heaves as my eyes flick between her. I know my answer isn't going to do shit to help this situation. But I can't lie to her, that would be even worse.

"The first night I met you," I say, losing all the fight in me.

Her eyes widen and she flinches as if I slapped her. That fucking hurts my soul.

"Marley." I reach for her but she takes a step back, shaking her head.

"No." Her voice cracks and so does my heart. Seeing her cry kills me. "You know what, fuck you. Go fuck yourself, you big, stupid horse asshole!" she shouts before turning around and running toward her dorm.

"Fuck!" I shout, my whole body vibrating with anger. With a growl, I spin around and smash my fist into the statute next to the fountain.

Pain spikes through my hand but I don't care. Just when I thought she was finally mine, I lost her again. God, what is wrong with me? I've let my messed up past make me have so many doubts regarding every aspect of my life. Marley isn't like the kids I grew up with, I know that. So why do I keep closing myself off, hiding things from her?

I should have just been honest from the start and allowed her to make her own choices.

And now I might have lost her forever.

No. No, not forever because I'm never giving up on her. The girl is going to have to take a restraining order out on me if she wants me gone. Even that might not keep me away.

I'm going to make it up to her. I'm going to show her how much I love her and how much I regret not being honest from the start.

When I get back to my dorm, I'm drained. Part of me wants to go find her, to make her listen. To tell her over and over again that I'm stupid and I'm sorry. That I regret not telling her. But it won't change anything. And it would probably make things a hell of a lot worse.

"Dude. Your hand. What the fuck?" Hayes is up off the bed and over to me in a second. "Are you okay?"

"No," I mutter. "I'm not okay. I'm never fucking okay. I just want my mate to be with me but all I do is fuck things up."

He gives me a pitying look and if my hand wasn't already busted up, I'd punch him for it.

"Things not go so well with your and Brooks" plan? Because he's been gushing about how good of a time he had with Stacy."

"No, the plan went off fine. Better than fine." I sigh, going over to my bed and kneeling down to grab the first aid kit.

"So, you and Marley are good then? Because you don't look like a man who finally got his mate to be his."

"Because I'm not." I shoot him a glare as I sit down on the bed and open the kit. "We had a mind-blowing night together. The only issue was we had sex before we talked and when we got back to the university, everything went to shit. And in anger, I blurted out that Marley was my mate and then she ripped me a new asshole."

"Fuck, man." Hayes shakes his head. "I told you, you should have told her a long time ago."

"I know," I growl as I start to clean my bloody hand. "I know, okay. And I'm stupid for not doing it. But it's not going to change anything now, so how about we don't kick me while I'm down?"

"Sorry." He sits down on his bed. "So, what are you going to do?"

"What I've been doing this whole time. Stalk the hell out of her until she talks to me again and then grovel like a bitch."

Hayes barks out a laugh. "You are probably one of the few guys who is willingly so open to admit they're wrong."

"What"s the point of denying it? It's not going to help get my girl back. Not going to help make me feel better. It's also the truth. My past fucked with my head and now I'm paying for it. Why hide the fact that I'm obsessed with this girl? I want the whole world to know. But more than anything, I want her to know."

"If anyone is going to wear her down and win her back, it's you. You"re a good guy, Lucius. One of the best I know. I know you"re going to treat her well. I'm rooting for you, man."

"Thanks."

Once I'm done bandaging up my hand, I shoot Sawyer a call.

"What"s up? Heard things went south fast," she answers.

"Don't want to talk about the details," I growl.

"Then what do you want to do?"

"You"re a girl. Help me. What kind of things would help win a girl back?"

"Well….."

I'm not sure if I like the tone of her voice. I really hope I don't end up regretting recruiting her on my Win Marley back plan. But at this point, I'll take any help I can get, because what I've been doing doesn't seem to be getting me anywhere.