Eighteen

I wake up with a groan,my mind immediately replaying last night"s events. Christ, why did I do that?

Stupid Marley. Stupid vagina betraying me.

The room is still dark, the early morning light barely creeping through the blinds. I roll over, and wince at the sting of the movement. Shit, did he rip my pussy in half? And he said that was just the tip? I'll surely die taking the whole thing.

Nope. There won't be a next time.

I drag myself out of bed, every movement a reminder of how good last night was. My mind is a whirl of thoughts as I get ready for the track meet. I can barely bring myself to look at Lucius as we move about the room getting ready. We don"t say much to each other, the silence between us thick and heavy.

What can I even say?

We should have talked before we fucked. We did everything in reverse, and I know it"s partly my fault. I"ve refused to speak to him for so long.

I'm still so mad that he just left and then showed up like nothing was wrong. It hurts more than I want to admit.

As we head to the meet, Lucius finally breaks the silence. "Will you sit with me at the meet?" he asks, his voice tentative.

Before I can think better of it, I answer, "Yes."

He smiles, and his ears flick back and forth, making me giggle.

"Sorry, the ears give away my feelings sometimes," he says, a hint of a laugh in his voice as he puts on a hat to cover them. He grabs my hand, leading me from the room.

We find a spot on the bleachers with Brooks, and the three of us settle in to watch the events. The energy of the meet helps to distract me, and I jump up and down cheering loudly as Stacy wins the two hundred meters, the hurdles, and the high jump. The woman is a powerhouse, and it"s no surprise she's here on a full scholarship for track.

Lucky betch.

When the meet finishes, we rush down to the track to congratulate Stacy. Brooks swoops her up in his tentacles, and she wraps her legs around him, kissing him passionately.

A pang hits my heart. That was me and Lucius this summer, and I miss it so much. I miss how he made me feel like I was the only woman in the world.

Why am I fighting it if he means what he says—that he loves me? We need to talk, really talk, before I let my pussy make decisions for me again.

As we head to the bus, I stick close to Stacy, wanting to sit next to her. She sits in an empty seat and Brooks goes to slide in next to her but I whirl around and face him.

"Please, let me sit with her." I push out my bottom lip and put my best puppy eyes on.

"Don't you want to sit with Lucius?" he asks.

"I need to talk to my best friend about said centaur. Please, Brooks? I'll owe you one." I'm practically begging and I swear if this kraken merman doesn't agree, I'm going to fry him on a grill. A little kraken filet.

Brooks pouts but reluctantly agrees. "Fine, but you owe me."

He walks away taking the spot next to Lucius, grumbling under his breath the whole time. When he drops into the seat next to his friend, Luci looks up at me with a raised brow.

I smile and sit down. Not wanting to upset him, but also, he doesn't need to know I'm contemplating forgiving him. I'm sure after last night he thinks we are all fine and dandy.

"What"s up, buttercup?" Stacy asks as we settle into our seats.

"Am I crazy or stupid for wanting to give me and Lucius another chance?" I blurt out, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Nope," she says firmly.

"You"re sure?" I ask, needing her reassurance.

"Yes, Marley, you love him and he obviously loves you. He came back for a reason. You messed up, he messed up. Now it"s time to act like the adults you are and figure it out."

"Yeah, we need to talk, especially after we fucked last night." I sigh.

Stacy whirls around, slugging me in the thigh hard.

"OW! What was that for?" I whine, rubbing the sore spot.

"You fucked the centaur and didn"t tell me? What the hell? How was it? How big was it? How are you alive?" She laughs, and I slap a hand over her mouth.

"Shhhh!" I hush her, quickly looking around to make sure no one is paying attention to us, and lower my voice. "It was amazing, and he didn"t even get the whole thing in. Like, he literally fucked with just a little more than the tip."

"Oooo, babe, I"m getting excited just thinking about it," she teases.

I throw my head back and laugh at my best friend"s antics. "What about you?" I ask. "Did you explore the tentacles?"

"No," she pouts. "We made out all night and he rubbed me through my pajamas until I came, but that"s it. No tentacle play." She crosses her arms in frustration. "I don"t know why. I was more than willing."

I shrug. "Maybe he"s trying to be a gentleman."

Stacy huffs. "If I wanted a gentleman, I"d be lusting after a human guy. I want a monster, so give me one."

Oh, sweet lord, the girl has it bad.

The rest of the ride is quiet as I ponder what to say to Lucius when we get off the bus. When we arrive back at campus, we all get off and grab our overnight bags from under the bus.

Bag in hand, I start the walk back to Seaside.

I feel him before I see or hear him.

Lucius grabs my hand and pulls me over to the fountain. "We need to talk," he says, his voice serious.

I nod. "You"re right, and you need to apologize for what you did." Guess we're doing this here and now. I can't keep putting this off.

His brows furrow like he's not sure what I mean. "I already said sorry, Marley. And I've been trying to make it up to you. You haven't exactly been easy to deal with," he argues.

"How could you just leave? You didn"t even let me explain. You just ignored me and left. I wasn't even worthy of an explanation?" I demand, my eyes welling with tears as they bore into his.

He lets out a heavy sigh, running a hand through his shaggy brown hair. "Marley. What I heard you say hurt me. But that"s not the only reason I went back to my uncle's and just packed up and left. I was stuck choosing between two very important things in my life and it hurt too much to know that to you I was just a summer fling. You were…are more than that to me. "

"I called you so many times, Lucius. I left dozens of voicemails, hundreds of texts, to the point I made myself look like a crazy person, and you couldn't even send a fucking ‘I need time' text?" I'm yelling now but I don't care. I need to get this off my chest. We're not ever going to be able to move on, minus sex, if we don't work this out and he needs to know that I'm aware I fucked up but he didn't even try. Like we weren't worth a chance.

He starts to talk, but I don't let him.

"I fucked up. My friends were pushing me for information and I didn't know what to say and I fucked up. I'm aware. I'm so damn sorry you heard those words because they weren"t even close to the truth. But you don't apparently even think what we had was worth a second shot, since you took off and left. Then, without a word, you show up on campus and want to work it out. I was miserable, Lucius. I cried every day and night. I couldn"t eat, I couldn"t sleep. Do you know how that felt?"

My heart is racing and I know my face is red, because I can feel the heat in my cheeks. It's taking everything inside of me not to cry, but he doesn't deserve my tears. I already gave enough of them to my pillow because of him.

He looks at me, his body trembling in anger, his nostrils flaring. "You don't think I know what being without you feels like Marley. You"re my fucking mate, so yeah, I think I have an idea since it was worse for me being without you for weeks!"

My eyes widen in shock, my pulse spiking. He didn't just say what I think he just said, did he? After a stunned moment of gaping like a damn fish, I scream, "I'm your what?"