45. CODY

CODY

I stretched out my sore muscles, groaning into the pillow to stifle my annoyance that I was awake. It didn’t matter how many times we slept in these bunks; it never got easier. My shoulder itched, the pain still a constant thrum after bad sleep. I rolled over carefully so as not to wake Dean; old habits dying hard in the form of both of us needing comfort.

Ella had snuck into our room again, tangled against Arlo’s chest on the top bunk. Van was butt naked, with his blanket around his head blocking out the sunlight. It was insane how much I loved my little family, and it was indescribable how thankful I was for them.

The smell of coffee and pancakes filled my nose, and I knew Dad was awake and cooking breakfast. Thanksgiving was important but, even more so, the only tradition that stood strong was him cooking breakfast the day after.

He had done it at home, he had done it here, and he continued to do it for Mrs. Shore even after Mama died. She insisted that he didn’t but he seemed to enjoy the tradition. I snuck from bed, slipping on a clean loose sweatshirt and a pair of sweats. I looked back at Dean for a moment, so peaceful in his sleep, and I took the chance to be grateful for him, to appreciate the person he helped me become despite my constant pushback. All the times I proved that bad luck and bad karma were real and dragged him down with me and he did it with a smile on his face.

I loved him, and I knew I always would. Now it was my turn to help him become someone who could love himself above everyone else.

It was obvious that the next weeks would be hell, wading through losing Clementine all over again, but I was finally in a place where I could extend my love and focus to other people. For once, I didn’t feel like I was going to self-destruct in the face of stress and disappointment.

And I owed everything to Dean and I’d walk through fire to prove it.

I inhaled a deep breath before saving Ella from the show of Van’s ass and covered him with a blanket. Arlo stirred against Ella, his eyes opening to see me as I backed away. To my surprise, there was no scowl as I stared at him, hoping that he’d understand that even if it ended in disaster, I still had to try.

He nodded and curled back into Ella, closing his eyes as I closed the door behind me.

Clementine had said Zoey put her up in a room on the main level, so that’s the first place I’d look. I sauntered by the bathroom, stopping to check my appearance in the mirror and using my hands to fix the blond flyaways that had formed during my sleep. From the top of the stairs, I could hear Clementine laughing, and the sound made my heart explode. A sweet melody that I had become so attached to that the thought of losing it again only made me sad.

I took the stairs two at a time, excitement rushing through my sleepy muscles as I rounded the corner. My feet tripped over each other just to see her, but she wasn’t alone. My Dad stood with his hand around a coffee cup, leaning against the counter as the pancakes cooked, and with a smile on his face talking to… Julien.

What the fuck?

My heart sank.

Every single muscle in my neck and shoulders tightened as I composed all the anger and shock that stirred around; swirling so fast beneath my chest that it formed a tornado that threatened to destroy everything in its path. Why the fuck was that guy even here? This was a weekend for the family, and he wasn’t Clementine’s.

His entire demeanor annoyed me. Tall with dark hair, thin lips, and a thick nose that took over all his other features; Julien had the face of a dopey-looking dog and brown eyes that drooped with the shape of his limp eyebrows. Never in my life had I wanted to hit someone more than in that moment. I forced the nausea down as he wrapped a hand around her waist and dug his fingers into the side of Clementine. My Clem .

“Morning, Cael.” Dad was the first to notice my presence.

Clementine tensed against Julien before she turned with a heartbreaking look on her face that was quickly replaced with a tight, professional smile.

“Dad.” I nodded. “Clem.” I looked over at her as I made my way through the kitchen.

“Julien Hearst.” He held out a hand to me with a crooked smile on his paper-thin lips that felt insincere. His voice was a grating, low-grade Philadelphia accent that curled at the end and forced the R in his name to roll away. It annoyed me even more than I already had been.

“Cael Cody,” I said, extending my hand because I could be polite. “He’s shorter than I expected,” I said, looking down at Clementine.

My Dad groaned from behind me; a warning to behave.

Well… I could , it didn’t mean I would be.

“Clemmy can make anyone look taller,” he teased and kissed the top of her head.

That was stupid. Clementine wasn’t short by any means, she was nearly five-nine. Annoyance flickered over my face, but I shoved it down, resisting the urge to roll my eyes.

“This is a surprise,” I said, grabbing a mug of coffee and sliding up onto the counter. There was no reason for me to hover, Julien’s handshake had been weaker than mine after major surgery and, frankly… He didn’t threaten me.

Dad could tell because his body relaxed a touch as I got comfortable.

“I figured Clem would want some comforts from home for the weekend, so I invited Julien to join us for a few days,” Dad said.

“How kind of you.” I didn’t take my eyes off Julien.

Clementine silently begged me to look at her, but I couldn’t.

Being blindsided by her ex-fiancé wasn’t on my bingo card for the weekend. The emotions that snowballed were laced and volatile and, given her silence, she wasn’t entirely into him being here either. Looking at her, seeing her big, apologetic brown eyes, would kill any willpower I had to not beat the shit out of that guy.

“I’ve been missing her so much.” Julien shook his arm around her and laughed as Clementine was jostled in his arms. “Jealous you lot have gotten to spend so much time with her. When Ryan called, I was surprised,” Julien said, looking between the three of us as irritation weighed down his fake smile. “She’s never talked about either of you.” His dejected beady brown eyes stared at me. “Not a single mention.”

I had so much I wanted to say, but my eyes slipped from Julien to Clementine.

Please don’t, she mouthed and forced a smile to her face.

“Just old family friends,” I said. “It’s been nice to catch up with her.” I slid off the counter, hovering over Julien by a good four inches with a cocky smile on my face. “I have to go set up for later,” I said, my lips pressing into a thin line. “Do you play baseball, Jeremy?”

“Julien,” he corrected me.

“Right, sorry, it’s a forgettable name.” I smirked when Clementine dipped her head to hide her expression.

“I play a little,” he finally answered, his chest rattled with shallow breaths, like a peacock ready to fight for its mate, but I didn’t need flashy colors to win Clementine back.

I had never lost her.

“Awesome.” I pointed to the circle of them in the kitchen and clapped my hands together. “I’ll see you on the field, Johnathan.”

“Julien.” He sighed.

“ Clemmy .” I looked at her, and she nearly snorted at my use of the disgusting nickname. “Enjoy your pancakes.” I winked. “Dad, make sure she gets extra whipped cream?”

Julien practically growled, his grip tightening on her side.

She shook her head but smiled at me, clearly amused with my nonsense, and it filled my chest with heat just knowing that she was entertained.

He’d have to work harder than that.

I could tell by the sparkle in her eye. Clementine was still mine.

Grabbing a sweater from the hook by the back door, I slipped it over my head and wandered out onto the deck. It was misting, but the rain felt good on my hot skin as I made my way down to the diamond and made sure everything was ready for the parents and players game we ran every year. I swiped a bat from the shed and tossed a ball in the air, swinging as hard as I could; letting the pain from my shoulder wash out all the jealous thoughts that plagued me.

It was better than letting them eat away at me.

For a man I just met, I had never hated anyone more.

And for Dad to bring him here, to rub that in my face… I wasn’t sure what he was playing at, but it wouldn’t work. I wouldn’t let him blow up my happiness for a second time. I couldn’t. It would kill me. I hit the ball over and over again until my shoulder screamed at me to stop.

“Fuck!” I screamed at the top of my lungs and threw the bat as hard as I could against the backstop. The light rain plastered my hair to my forehead and dripped from my nose as I sank on my haunches and caught my breath.

Dig deeper, Honeybug. Something else is eating at you.

The itch clawed between my shoulder blades, begging me to give in.

“You alright, Kitten?” Arlo called from behind me. His dark hair was damp and his tank top was clinging to his chest.

I looked over my shoulder at him, the build up of water dripping into my eyes as I found him leaning against one of the dugouts with his arms crossed. I contemplated lying to him, telling him that I was fine just so he wouldn’t come down on me with his older-brother-bullshit, but he stared right through my thoughts.

“No,” I said, defeated, and used my hands on my thighs to shove off the ground. “But I’m not—”

“Bad?” He finished for me as I got closer and nodded. Arlo watched me with dark eyes. Concern flickering behind them as he evaluated the situation. “Do you need to go home?”

“No.” I shook my head. “I can manage.”

“Ah. You out here pushing your shoulder to extremes and screaming in the rain suggests otherwise.” He cocked an eyebrow at me.

“Healthy outlet.”

“Until it’s not.” Arlo scowled.

“I promise if I can’t, you can drive me back to Harbor.” I tapped my fingers to my chest, my shoulder protesting from the movement, but I couldn’t let him win every aspect of the argument .

I could tell he wasn’t convinced even as we walked back up to the cabin, and he poured more coffee for me and one for himself. Everyone had gotten up and, one by one, were greeted in the kitchen by our new guest. Arlo and Silas nearly died drinking their coffees when Julien introduced himself to them without prompt. He just sat down at their table like they were old friends. The only thing breaking me free of the tightly twisted frustration was Ella removing the knife and the fork from his vicinity.

Once the dishes were done and the awkwardness faded away, whatever family wanted to play baseball flooded down the path to the diamond. The rest either spent the day locked away from the chill of the mid-November air or bundled up in the bleachers, ready to watch us all.

“That’s him?” Van tied his shoes beside me on the bench.

Julien hung around Clementine in a constant, half-assed piggy-back formation, and it looked uncomfortable. The rain had stopped but the field was still soft and the game today would get messy. Everyone was in long pants and hoodies to shield themselves from the chilly air. I tugged a beanie down over my hair to keep my ears warm, leaning against the fence with my back to the love birds.

“Oh my God.” Ella slapped Zoey playfully on the other side of Van. “Do you know who he looks like? It’s been bothering me all morning.”

Zoey looked from her own shoes to the diamond and narrowed her eyes as her head cocked to the side. “Scott Eastwood?” She said, “Just brunet.”

“No!” Ella laughed. “Wait until he does the thing with his lip,” she said, and everyone leaned forward to watch him like he was an animal in the zoo. “Right there! Do you see it?”

Zoey giggled, “Oh fuck, that’s why you’re so wound up. He looks like a dollar-store version of Miles Teller.”

She nearly fell from the bench laughing as the rest of us surveyed Clem’s ex-fiance from a distance. Dean’s fingers were wrapped in the dugout fence, turning back to look at us with his brows knitted together.

“I didn’t think the man could get uglier… but here we are.” Ella scowled and it flooded me with a playfulness I had been forgetting about all morning.

“She’s got a point.” He nodded. “He’s got something wrong with his face. ”

“Yeah…” I scoffed, wandering past in a fit of laughter. “His entire face.”

Silas hovered in the family dugout with Luc, both watching Julien closely as he chatted with Nicholas in the outfield.

“What do you guys think?” I asked as I approached.

“If he likes Nicholas, there might be something wrong with him.” Luc was the first to answer. “You should keep an eye on him.”

“See.” I stared at Silas, who had his arms crossed over his chest and a hat pulled over his brows. “If Luc doesn’t like him, then I’m doing the right thing.”

“I didn’t say I didn’t like him, Cody,” he grumbled, low and stern like Arlo always does. “But there’s something about him that’s off-putting.”

I rolled my eyes and moved on. “You guys ready?”

Mrs. Shore, Mr. Tucker, Robert, and Sawyer all nodded along with the other family members and double-checked their equipment. Ella appeared from behind us and wrapped an arm around my middle as I laid mine across her shoulders. She was tucked into Arlo’s sweater, and her hair was pulled back into the cutest little blonde braids.

“How do we separate the teams for Thanksgiving?” She asked.

“The hat.” Arlo said it like it was obvious as he walked through the dugout, pulling his hat down and calling out to Zoey. “Baby, it’s always the hat.”

“Do you guys like to pre-plan that when no one is looking or…?” Ella laughed, clearly suffering from déjà vu. Her gaze flickered back and forth between her best friend and fiancé. “I just imagine Zoey scribbling names in the closet while you handle the safety scissors…is that how that goes, or what?”

Arlo chuckled, kissing her cheek in passing, and held the hat out to Zoey. “Wouldn’t you like to know what we talk about when you aren’t around?”

“I mean, yeah?” Ella followed him back to the group of players at center field.

“Before we get started, does everyone know the rules of recreation baseball?” Arlo asked loudly as Zoey dumped a bunch of pieces of paper into the hat. No one said anything. Most people had played in this game for years. My eyes wandered to Julien, who wasn’t even paying attention.

“Johnny boy, did you hear him?” I asked loudly and crossed my arms .

”Yeah, I heard him. I know the rules.” Julien turned his dopey-looking face toward me and rolled his eyes. I had to stifle the laughter that bubbled from me when he answered to the wrong name.

I could feel Dean’s chest brush against my back as I pinned my shoulders back and tried to control the urge to beat the hell out of him as an early Christmas present to myself.

“Embarrass him on the field.” Dean pushed forward against me and clapped his hand over my shoulder.

“You can guarantee it.” I smiled brightly but my eyes had moved to where Clementine watched me cautiously, waiting for the storm.