18. Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Eighteen

Quinn

I pulled up outside the warmly lit house, and stared through the light dusting of snow that was falling. Lachlan's childhood home was a massive mansion. I guess I'd known that, somewhere in the back of my mind, but seeing it up close was something else entirely.

Five stories high, with a porch that ran the length of the front of the house, and big wide columns on each side. It was a beautiful house with massive, heavy front doors. The woods surrounding it on all sides were breathtaking, and my cat reminded me I hadn't shifted in too long. Not that my cat enjoyed the snow and cold, because he did not. Lazing in the sun was more his speed. Still, I needed to make a point of shifting, even for a light run – a very light run – more like a brisk walk. Running was not my thing. Exercise. Blech.

I was still tired, and a bit grumpy and achy, a state I'd been in since my bout with the flu almost two weeks ago. But I'd promised Lachlan I would come to his mom's house for Christmas Eve dinner. I planned to put a smile on my face, and push my surly mood to the back burner. The Sweet Spot was officially closed until after the New Year, and I'd been more than happy to flip the closed sign and lock up a couple of hours earlier.

I'd gone home to change, and had dozed off on my couch, not waking until the buzzing of my phone had invaded my dreams. It had been a text from Lachlan asking me for my E.T.A. Looking at the time, I'd winced. I was late, something I hated being.

The front door opened, and Lachlan's broad frame filled the entryway, before I had a chance to turn the engine off on my car. My heart warmed at the sight of him, and some of my exhaustion slipped away. We hadn't seen much of each other the last few weeks, and I realized I'd missed him. It was a strange sensation for me, but it made me feel warm inside. We'd agreed to try dating, and I was going to put my best effort into it. I got out of my car, and waved at him.

One of his rare, full smiles that was brighter than the sun graced his face. An unsmiling Lachlan was gorgeous, but there was a stern look to his rugged features, making him a bit unapproachable. Like the wolf he was, staring down his prey, you wanted to approach with caution.

A smiling Lachlan was another beast entirely. It truly was a sight to behold, and one that took my breath away each time he aimed that mega-watt brightness in my direction. Something he'd been doing more and more of lately. I was starting to really like having that smile aimed my way.

His smile completely transformed his face into something of sheer beauty. And when that smile reached all the way to his stunning eyes, making their icy blue depths warm, well…Lachlan looked good smiling, more than good, and it was something I wanted him to keep doing. That smile always made me want to get him naked. That would definitely have to wait until later. Much later. It had been a week since we'd found the time to get naked with each other, and just seeing him now had my blood rushing south. No one had ever had this effect on me before .

He came out to meet me, his arms going around me in a tight squeeze. I squeezed back, burying my nose in the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent. My stomach was still off, coffee was not my friend these days, but Lachlan's scent never made me feel icky. It actually seemed to help when my stomach was tied up in knots.

"I've missed you." He kissed the top of my curls, and it never failed to make me go soft around my edges.

"I've missed you too." I realized I wasn't lying when I said the words back. "Were you watching for me?"

"I was. You're later than I expected. The natives got restless and started to eat."

I ducked my head, feeling my face heat in embarrassment. "I kind of fell asleep when I got home. Your text woke me up."

He tilted my chin up with his finger, taking a long look at my face. "You look tired."

I shrugged, snuggling into his warmth more. It was cold out tonight, snow starting to fall from the skies. "Comes with the job. I'll have time to sleep next week."

Though I knew from experience, the first few days I'd still be up early. My body was just used to it, and my internal alarm would wake me up, even if I wanted to sleep in. But I would be able to catch some naps and I was looking forward to those.

We'd turned a corner in our relationship since my bout with the flu. Deciding to just date and see where things went had taken some of the pressure we'd been feeling about being fated mates off of us. We'd both relaxed, or I had, deciding I was just going to sit back and enjoy this ride, for as long as it lasted.

While we'd not had that much time to spend together, due to my schedule, Lachlan still made a point to send me food knowing I'd forget to eat. He seemed to have some preternatural sixth sense about my hunger pangs. Food seemed to appear just when I realized I hadn't eaten all day.

On the nights when I worked extra late, there was more than one occasion I'd arrived home to find my big alpha waiting in his SUV parked in my driveway. I'd barely been able to see straight, the first time it had happened. I'd told him in no uncertain terms I wasn't up for sex. He'd just given me his shy little smile, bustled me into my warm house, into a hot bath and into bed. To just sleep.

"You sure you're okay with meeting my family?" His words shook me out of my thoughts.

Not at all , my mind supplied, while my mouth said, "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

My nonchalance was such a lie. I couldn't remember a time in my life where I'd ever met anyone's family. Certainly not Leo's, as he'd claimed to not have any close relatives. For all I knew he'd been telling the truth, but so much of what came out of Leo's mouth had been lies, I didn't know. The casual hook-ups I usually preferred, didn't involve meeting anyone's family.

I was nervous to meet Lachlan's family. What if they found me lacking? What if they'd expected him to show up with a good little omega, like he'd planned to have? What if I forgot what fork to use, or let an F bomb drop? I mean I used the word like it was a noun, verb and adjective.

Why I was even spending a second worrying about any of it, was stressing me out. All of this was brand new for me. I was doing things I'd never imagined wanting to do with anyone. I was feeling things I'd never thought I'd feel with anyone. This man made me question everything about myself.

At times I felt like I had one foot in and one foot out of our relationship. A part of me wanted to jump headfirst into all the feelings that surrounded me when he was near. To just say fuck it, and let myself feel and be, and enjoy every second of it.

The other part knew how this was going to eventually end. It had to. We wanted vastly different things. I knew the differences between us would eventually blow up. Spectacularly. When it did, it was going to hurt like hell. That thought, that belief, kept me from plunging forward, head first, full throttle. Because it wasn't just going to hurt when it ended. It was going to destroy me. I knew it. I could feel it down to my toes. I didn't like the feeling. Better to get out before I got hurt, I kept telling myself.

End it soon.

I didn't want it to end, though, so I kept my mouth shut, and pushed any worries I had to the side. I was a mixed up, emotional, fucked up mess, and I'd been too busy to sit down and sort through any of my feelings.

Which was why I was standing outside this huge mansion, in the cold and snow, with this breathtakingly beautiful alpha smiling down at me. Fuck, I was in deep.

"It can get a little rowdy when my brothers and I all get together," he warned. "We tend to pick at each other, but it's harmless. We love each other fiercely, it's just…we're all very different people."

"I imagine it's that way for most siblings." It was something I'd always envied with friends. I'd always wished for a sibling; someone I could tease and be teased right back. I'd always been fascinated when I'd be at a friend's house who had siblings. It was always loud, and rowdy, and I'd loved every second of it.

There was something in Lachlan's eyes, something that dimmed their light for just a second, but I saw it. "What? What was that look?"

He shrugged, and acted like he was going to brush my question aside. I reached out and caressed his cheek. Because as much as I knew this thing was going to blow up between us, I always loved touching him. I found myself wanting to touch him all the time, whenever we were together, in some small way. "Tell me."

He turned his head into my hand, his eyes closing, as if he was trying to breathe me in. "People always expect us to be exactly alike. Because we're identical. They always seem surprised when they realize we are different. Or disappointed."

"What people?" I demanded.

He shrugged. "Most people."

"That's just stupid." I scoffed. "You're not fucking clones, for Pete's sake. That's just dumb."

He barked out a laugh. "Yeah, it is."

My stomach took that moment to rumble loudly. "Are you hungry?" he asked, and I shivered a little.

"Why are you always trying to feed me?" I huffed, though I was growing used to his need to take care of me. It was sweet, though I would never admit to him, and I had started looking forward to the food deliveries. Looking forward to the nights I'd come home to find him waiting.

"Because you need fattening up." He swatted playfully at my butt, popping it just enough to make some noise, but not sting too badly. It caused a shiver of wild need to uncurl in my stomach, shooting straight to my dick. I willed it away. I didn't need to meet his family for the first time with a chub.

"Hey!" I tried swatting him back, and he laughed, ducking and grabbing my hand.

"Come on. Let's get you fed."

He ushered me towards the beckoning warmth of the door, his hand touching the small of my back, warming me. It was the lightest of touches, barely there, yet I felt it all the way to my toes. There was nothing sexual about it, but it may well have been the most intimate touch I'd ever felt. I leaned into it, craving more. It was a protective gesture, a possessive gesture, and it made my insides all warm and gooey.

Before I could say anything, a shadow loomed in the doorway, startling us both. In front of me stood an exact replica of Lachlan.

Yet, somehow, not quite the same.

As I studied what was, without a doubt, an absolutely breathtakingly gorgeous man in front of me, I immediately cataloged the slight differences. Yes, at first glance, they were identical. But only for the briefest, barest look.

This man's hair was brushed back from his forehead, and was midnight black, not one strand of silver gracing his thick locks. He had the same perpetual, dark five o-clock shadow, and his ice blue eyes were identical. He was a tad broader through the shoulders than Lachlan, and he filled the doorway with his presence. He was wearing black on black – black jeans, black boots, black sweater – and an air of danger seemed to seep from his pores.

He was sexy, and had that bad boy thing working for him, but he wasn't Lachlan. I had no doubt that in a crowd, I'd be able to pick my alpha out. Yep, I'd given up on telling myself he wasn't my alpha. My cat and I knew better.

Mate . My cat supplied the word, with a bit of smugness.

"Jameson Michael Sinclair, do not smoke in my house!" The voice was decidedly female, and had a stern bite to it, while still managing to be soft and melodic. The man's eyes widened, and he looked down at the cigar he was holding in one hand, the tip smoldering.

"Busted," Lachlan whispered, amusement lacing his tone.

"How does she do that?" the other one whispered back. "I just lit the damn thing. "

"Because I'm your mother, and I know everything!" that same female voice echoed to us from somewhere in the house. Unseen but definitely heard.

Lachlan waggled a finger at his brother, who was Jamie, if I had to guess, based on the woman's shouting of his full name.

"You're in trouble," my alpha sing-songed, in a voice I would have never imagined coming out of his mouth.

Jamie gave him a playful shove. "Am not. I'm the baby, I get away with everything."

The way he said it, and the smiles on both their faces, told me this was probably an often repeated mantra.

"Baby or not," the woman's voice floated to us again, "I'll take my wooden spoon to you, if you light up in this house again!"

I bit back a laugh, as both Lachlan and Jamie's identical eyes grew big.

"She has the place bugged, I swear," Lachlan whispered again.

Jamie shook his head, stepping out into the cold, and taking a long drag on his cigar. "I swept the place. No bugs. It's those mom wolf ears of hers."

The smoke drifted over to me, filling my nostrils and I flinched as the odor hit me. Ugh, my stomach did not like that at all. I turned slightly away, not wanting to draw attention to myself, while also trying to inhale some clean, cool air into my body.

Jamie, however, caught the movement and immediately snuffed the offending cigar out in the snow. "Man, you look a little green. You okay?"

Lachlan immediately searched my face, frowning at whatever he saw there.

"I'm fine." I brushed their concern off. "I'm just hungry. Long day, and I have a bad habit of forgetting to eat."

Lachlan seemed to accept that answer for fact, even though he was still frowning at me, and proceeded to make introductions. "Quinn, this is my brother, Jamie. The youngest of us. A fact he uses to his advantage any chance he gets."

"Nice to meet you."

"Jamie, this is Quinn, my ma…" Lachlan stopped himself before the word could escape. "Ah, my…"

"Boyfriend," I supplied smoothly, rolling the word on my tongue. It sounded foreign, a little odd, but right.

Jamie raised a brow, looking me over from head to toe, while I tried not to squirm under his perusal.

"Goddess, shut the door," another deep voice cut in. "Were you all raised in a barn?"

Another large body came up the walkway from behind us. This brother was not as broad across the shoulders as either Lachlan or Jamie, but no less impressive in his size. His hair was a shade lighter than the black of his two brothers. It was a rich, sable brown, like a dark roast coffee. A neatly trimmed mustache and goatee framed his upper lip and jaws. He was just as handsome and sexy as his brothers, though.

His blue eyes ran over me, assessing the same way Jamie had, but I felt like it was in a completely different way.

"Finn!" Lachlan grabbed his brother in a hug, which turned into them both shoving at each other, like little kids.

Finn. So, this was Wade's nemesis. I'd be keeping my eye on this one, if for no other reason than to try to figure out why he disliked my best friend so much. Or why Wade disliked him so much, as the feelings were on both sides.

"Get out of the cold, you idiots." Finn scoffed at his brothers. "At least close the door, if you are going to stand around in the snow. "

"Wait, I forgot something." I rushed back to my car, sliding a little in a slick spot and hearing Lachlan growl under his breath before I righted myself. Once I had my packages secure, I hurried to catch up with him.

"Dessert," I told him when I saw him eyeing the cookie platter in my hands, "and a gift for your mom."

I'd taken an hour out of my day yesterday, to rush over to Sinclair's department store and purchase some insanely expensive gourmet chocolates. I knew better than to show up someplace without a hostess gift. My parents had raised me better, and I had no doubt my mom would somehow find out. I never knew how she always seemed to know these things, but she did.

Lachlan closed the door behind us, blocking out the cold and snow which was falling faster now, and shaking his damp head. "You didn't need to do that, you know?"

"I know," I said, stamping the snow off my Vans. I should have worn my boots, but we'd been lucky so far this year and hadn't had much snow. Looks like we were in for a white Christmas after all, the way the snow was coming down in heavy sheets. "My mom would kill me if she found out I had showed up empty handed. Believe me, she would find out. She's got spies everywhere."

He helped me off with my coat, then ushered me past a homey looking great room, into a richly paneled dining room. The long, mahogany dining table seated at least twelve. The room smelled amazing, the tangy scent of tomato sauce and garlic filled my nostrils. My stomach growled loudly, and I was sure everyone had heard it.

A petite, beautiful blonde woman, seated at the head of the table, stood and hurried over to us. She couldn't have stood more than five feet tall, and her chocolate brown eyes sparkled. "You must be Quinn. I've heard so much about you. I'm so very happy to meet you. "

Before I could formulate a suitable response, she pulled me down into a hug. "I'm a hugger." She gave me a good squeeze, then paused, sniffing. "Oh," she whispered and pulled away. I resisted the urge to sniff myself. Did I smell bad? I'd showered when I'd gotten home, and I usually smelled like my kitchen, which wasn't a bad thing.

Lachlan waved a hand at the only one of his brothers still seated at the table. "Quinn, this is my brother, Brendan."

He did the introductions, and Brendan stood, shaking my hand over the table of food. Brendan and Lachlan looked the most alike to me, standing side by side. Brendan's hair was more salt and pepper, heavy on the salt. He wore silver, wire framed glasses, that did nothing to detract from his handsome features. He would make someone one hell of a sexy, silver fox daddy.

"Come, sit, eat. I made pasta and garlic bread." Mary pointed to two vacant seats, and I slid into the chair Lachlan had pulled out for me.

With all the quads sitting next to each other, my eyes glanced from one to the other. While they did look alike, there were enough differences that I would easily be able to tell Lachlan apart from them. Though I doubted that had been the case when they were younger. I couldn't imagine them as babies, all looking exactly alike. How had they been able to tell them apart? I was curious and vocalized my question, as Lachlan took it upon himself to heap a pile of pasta and meat sauce on my plate, with some garlic bread on the side.

Mary laughed. "I had these different colored bands I kept on their wrists. It was the only way we could keep them straight for years. I think they wore those bands until they were about three. Their personalities had developed by then, so we took them off. We were able to tell them apart at that time. Though other people couldn't. "

"Wow Mom," Jamie teased, "What if you accidentally switched one of our bands? Or we did? Maybe I'm not really Jamie. Maybe I'm Lachlan."

"I should be so lucky," Lachlan muttered under his breath, while I dug into my food like the starving man I was. I got the impression from bits and pieces that Lachlan had shared, that he wasn't always happy about being the oldest. It seemed to come with a lot of expectations and responsibilities that his other brothers didn't have to contend with.

I was about four bites into the amazing spaghetti and sauce, content to listen to the brothers tease and pick at each other, envious in a way an only child is, when queasiness rolled over my stomach. I nearly dropped my fork, as I tried to take a deep breath in through my nose.

I'd been battling this stomach thing for weeks now, off and on, and hadn't mentioned it to Lachlan. I was convinced that the infrequent, random bouts of nausea were due to exhaustion and stress. I hadn't thrown up since I'd had the flu weeks ago, but there were times it felt like it was a good possibility. I put my fork down, and quietly pushed my plate away from me.

"Quinn?" Lachlan's voice was filled with worry. "What is it?"

I shook my head, pushing my chair back quickly. "I'm sorry, may I use the restroom?" I knew my words were short, my breathing quick, but I was seriously trying not to puke over my plate.

"There's a half bath off the kitchen, through that door," Mary told me, pointing to a door opposite the one we had entered from. I hurried through it, walking quickly, but not wanting to draw more attention to myself than I already had.

The door took me into a large, spotless kitchen, filled with stainless steel appliances and granite countertops that any other time I would love to gawk at. I gulped, looking around helplessly, my hand over my mouth. I wasn't going to make it to the bathroom. I could feel hot bile in the back of my throat, and there was no stopping it.

I rushed to the wide farmhouse sink and puked my guts into it. Knowing Lachlan's entire family could hear me hurling, and not giving one fuck. I gasped, sputtered, choked and dry heaved. I could hear the sounds of numerous feet rushing to the kitchen.

An arm wrapped around my waist; a hand wrapped itself in my hair. Pulling it back, and out of my way, as I heaved again. A part of me wanted to fight against the steel muscled arm around me, but I didn't have the strength. My legs were shaking, threatening to dump me on the floor. That arm was the only thing keeping me upright.

I heard water running, and then a cool cloth was soothing over my face. A large hand brushed my forehead, in the same way my mom used to check my temperature when I was small. "Shh, lean back against your alpha, he's got you."

I wasn't sure who was speaking, but when large fingers encircled my wrist, I guessed it was Finn. The doctor. I did what he had ordered, and leaned back against the body holding me. Lachlan. My alpha.My mate.

"It was the garlic," Mary's soft voice said. "I should have said something when I hugged him. I was the same way when I was pregnant with you lot. Couldn't get two bites of anything with garlic in me, before I was tossing it right back up. It was quite annoying."

Lachlan's head spun in her direction like Linda Blair in ‘The Exorcist' .

"What are you talking about, Mom?" He sounded exasperated, and worried.

"Quinn's pregnant. I thought you hadn't said anything because you were waiting to tell people. Isn't that what you young people do nowadays? Wait until a certain time to tell people to make sure everything is good? Nonsense if you ask me. "

Pregnant? What? What the fuck?

"I'm not pregnant," I mumbled, my legs still trembling. The only thing keeping me upright was Lachlan. Finn was done fussing with my wrist, and had moved on to peering in my eyes. He did glance at his mom over my shoulder, and he gave Lachlan a look I couldn't decipher.

"I smelled it on you when I hugged you." Mary glanced from me to Lachlan, then her mouth formed a little O. "You didn't know? Oh, my goodness."

"Mom, are you sure?" Finn asked.

"Well, I'm no doctor, but I know a pregnant omega when I smell one. It is faint yet." She turned her brown eyes to Lachlan. "Surely you have noticed Quinn's scent has changed."

My scent had changed? I was reeling from her pregnancy bomb that had just been dropped. I couldn't be pregnant. I was on birth control.

I turned to look over my shoulder at Lachlan's face. His blue eyes were troubled. "I just thought it was because…" His face turned a pretty shade of pink. "I just thought it was our scents mixing."

"I smell different?!" I demanded, hissing.

His blush grew deeper. "Like you, but also a little citrusy, with a lot more cinnamon. Like a warm cinnamon roll, with a hint of orange."

I shook my head, pushing out of his arms, and pacing. My hands flew to my hair, tugging a little. "I'm on birth control. I can't be pregnant."

"If you're not going to put a ring on it, you should at least claim him, Lach," Jamie snarked, around a mouth full of a cookie he'd dug from the platter I'd brought.

"There will be no claiming!" My voice was shrill in the kitchen. "And no rings!"

"These cookies are amazeballs, by the way." Jamie's voice was muffled as he chewed .

"Thanks," I squeaked, feeling very much on the verge of losing my shit. I waved a hand in front of my face. "Is it hot in here? It's boiling in here. Why is it so hot in here?"

Mary crossed her arms over her chest. "So, you haven't had sex with my son then?"

"Mom!" Lachlan barked, and I stopped my pacing for a minute, feeling like a teenager who'd been caught in an alpha's backseat.

Jamie and Brendan glanced at each other, silently communicating. "We're just gonna…go do something in the living room."

I chewed on my thumbnail. "Um. Well, yes. But I'm on birth control," I stressed again, weakly.

She waved a hand in the air. "Nothing is one hundred percent except not doing it. And that's no fun." She wasn't wrong, but I'd never had any problems before, not even one little scare.

I waved a hand in front of my face, tugging at my shirt. "Is it hot in here?" I repeated because I was on fire. "It's so hot in here." I was burning up, my churning stomach long forgotten.

"Birth control," I kept repeating, though I didn't think anyone was listening to me.

"Did you knot him, Lachlan?" Mary turned her questioning gaze to her oldest son.

"Mom, please stop!" Lachlan ran a hand over his face. "I'm not having this conversation with you!"

I fanned my sweating face, my mind whirling. "Are you hot? It's so hot." I glanced at the French doors in the kitchen. "Do these open? I need to go. Snow. I need the snow. Snow is cold."

"Quinn?" Lachlan's voice was worried.

I turned to him, my hand on the doorknob. "Outside. Hot. Snow. So hot. "

I pulled at the doors, rattling them when they refused to open. Finn, bless him, calmly came over and opened the door for me. The cold, snowy air on my heated face was bliss. I rushed out into the weather that had taken an awful turn, tugging at my clothes.

I needed to shift. Now.

"Let him go, Lach." Finn's voice was calm. "Give him a minute. I take it this wasn't something you had talked about?"

"Uh, we briefly talked about it." Lachlan chose his words carefully, and I was thankful for that. I couldn't deal with his family learning of our vastly different opinions on having children. Not now. My mind wasn't dealing with any of this right now.

My hands seemed to have no problems figuring out what needed to be done. I was naked before I knew it. I didn't have a care if Lachlan's family could see me. Thankfully in the shifter world, you got used to nudity at a young age. I just knew I needed to shift. Needed to turn my brain off, and let my cat out.

Without thinking about it, my bones and muscles changed, and I shifted. Sleek, black fur covered my long limbs. My cat stretched, then snickered, as snowflakes fell on my snout. My whiskers twitched. My overheated body enjoyed the cold for once, and I sank down onto the freezing concrete of Mary's back patio. There was already about two inches of snow covering the ground.

I tried to concentrate on my body, pushing away the quietly murmured voices of Finn and Lachlan. I didn't hear anything but my own heartbeat. I gave up and let my cat have control.

"Oh, look at this beautiful creature," Mary's voice crooned, and I twitched my long, black tail in her direction. My cat was a little vain, and liked being fawned over. "Lachlan, you should shift. You two need to scent each other. "

My cat's green eyes saw our mate ruffle his hair. "This isn't exactly how I wanted my first shift with Quinn to go, Mom."

She scoffed at him. "Needs must and all that."

Lachlan bent next to me, and I sniffed his outstretched hand, a rumbling purr issued from deep inside me.

"You're magnificent, Quinn." He ran a hand down my neck, the long length of my back, all the way to my tail. "Look at you, baby. You're stunning. I'd know those green eyes anywhere."

My cat nuzzled his hand, licking at his palm. My cat stood, towering over his still kneeling frame, and nuzzled his chin, big head knocking into his. He rubbed all over Lachlan's face, marking him as ours, scenting him, as he laughed, his hands buried in thick, black fur. Something seemed to shift inside me.

Finn stood in the doorway. "Give me a half hour, and I'll meet you at your place."

Lachlan nodded, then stood up. My cat flounced back down, tail swishing in the quickly falling snow. Green eyes blinked, watching Lachlan shed his clothes in the cold, shifting. A huge silver wolf nuzzled my cat, marking me as his. Brilliant blue eyes stared into green, a calmness stilling the turmoil in my mind.

We stayed that way for another few minutes, bodies next to each other, snuffling and sniffing, nuzzling. Finally, I knew we needed to find out for sure if I was indeed pregnant. I shifted back, cursing at the cold and the snow. Lachlan shifted too, but he seemed to be able to stand the cold better than me. We both hurried back into our clothes, inside to the warm kitchen. Thankfully, it was empty this time.

I stared at Lachlan. I was sure he could read all my emotions in my big eyes. He looked as shell shocked as I felt. I bit at my lower lip, and he gently pulled it from my teeth, running his finger over the reddened flesh. "It's going to be okay, Quinn. No matter what."

"I don't…" I stopped my words. I didn't need his family overhearing me.

Lachlan looked sad for a minute, his blue eyes showing a flash of hurt, before clearing. "I know." He left the rest of my sentence hanging in the air. "We don't even know for sure."

He was trying to reassure me, while my mind went back to whirling, and adding up all the things since my flu. The queasiness, the ungodly tiredness I couldn't shake. The achiness I'd carried around in my abdomen for more than a week. All the things I'd shrugged off as stress, work, the holidays, lingering effects from the flu. Fuck, I'd even thought it might be an ulcer or my appendix. A part of me still told myself it could be any of the above, while a smaller part wrestled with knowing I was pregnant.

He touched my cheek tenderly. "Finn is going to meet us at my place – it's not far from here – and we're going to find out for sure. Take a test, and we'll know one way or another, tonight."

He made it sound so easy. Like the results of this test might not change everything for us. The thought of being pregnant horrified me. I hadn't changed my mind on kids. If I was pregnant, then what? I didn't want kids, and Lachlan did. We hadn't had enough time to discuss it, beyond the initial conversation, but I seriously doubted he had changed his mind. I hadn't.

He was right though; I couldn't make any decisions until we knew for sure. My heart was pounding in my chest again, my palms sweating. I felt on the verge of a panic attack, and pushed it down.

I nodded into his hand. "Okay." I took a deep, shuddering breath. "Let's go."

He held my gaze for a minute. "It's going to be fine, Quinn. "

"I know." I was lying. Nothing had been fine since he'd walked into my bakery. I didn't think anything was going to be fine . Not at all. Not ever again.