Chapter Thirty-Five

Norah

I've been home for three days and have rarely left my bed. If not for my friends, I likely would have forgotten to eat and shower. The moment I stepped off the plane in North Carolina, I was greeted by Charlie and Layla. I managed to maintain my composure the entire flight from Ireland, but as soon as they enveloped me in their arms, I broke. My knees hit the ground and I wept openly. It felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest, shattered, then shoved back in haphazardly, piece by piece. It hurt to even breathe. Charlie and Layla didn't bat an eye. They sank to the ground and wrapped their arms around me, not saying a word. They didn't ask for details or slander Eamon's name. They got me in the car, took me home, made me shower and eat, then sent me straight to bed. They took my phone away and unplugged any electronic devices in my room before curling up on either side of me and going to sleep.

I've finally had enough of my own moping and crawl out of bed. I force myself to shower, willing myself to not think about the shower with Eamon. It feels like a losing battle, so I turn the water all the way cold and screech when the icy water hits my skin. It's enough to clear the haze of unwanted memories. After showering, I forego the sweats and pajamas I've been living in and don jeans and a hoodie. When I step into the living room, I find Charlie and Layla perched on the bar stools around the island, and Amelia and Myra curled up on the couch. Charlie hops from her perch to pour me a cup of coffee. She doctors it just the way I like it and hands it to me with a kiss on my cheek.

"Thanks," I murmur, then look around the space. "What are you all doing here?"

"What do you think we're doing here?" Myra asks softly, folding her hands over her growing belly. "We're here for you. "

My eyes brim with tears. Before they can overflow, I shake my head and blink rapidly.

"I'm not going to cry anymore," I whine, waving my hands in front of my face in an attempt to dry the tears. "I'm really happy to see all of you."

One by one, they all come to hug me. When it's Myra's turn, I can't hold it back any longer. "Just kidding. I'm definitely going to cry. My, you're having a baby girl! I'm getting a new niece!"

Myra laughs, wiping the tears from her face. "I know. I can't even believe it. I thought I'd feel terrified, but I'm so freaking excited!"

Placing my hands on her slightly rounded belly, I tell her, "You're going to be one of those pregnant women who looks like she just swallowed a basketball. The rest of you will still be perfect."

"Ugh, I don't know about that. I feel like I'm already swelling," she groans.

"No," I say, shaking my head. "You're perfect. When I found out you were having a girl, I told Eam…"

I suck in a sharp breath that feels like swallowing glass.

"Do you want to talk about it, Norie?" Layla asks tentatively.

No. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to relive the moment he broke my heart, the moment he told me he didn't want me anymore. But that's why they're all here. I move to the couch and snuggle in next to Amelia, who drapes an arm around my shoulders.

"Might as well get this over with," I mutter "The sooner I get it all out, the sooner I can move forward, right?"

Charlie and Layla exchange a doubtful look with each other. I start to question it when Amelia says, "Norah, there's no rush. No timeline. You can take as much time as you need. This was a blow you didn't see coming. Hell, none of us did."

Nodding, I say, "I know. I just don't want to stay stuck here for too long. I went through all of the stages of grief after my Mom died. I know this isn't a death, but I can already feel myself becoming that shell of a person. I'm not going to waste my life pining for someone who doesn't want me around."

So I tell them the entire story, from the moment we got the call from Eamon's Mom to the moment my flight landed and Charlie and Layla met me at the airport. I told them, without going into too much detail, about making love in the shower and how intimate it was. How we'd professed our love for each other and I just knew that he was my future.

"What the hell is he thinking?" Myra demands once I've finished the recounting, outrage etched all over her face.

"It sounds like he's got a lot of guilt about leaving his Mom," Layla offers, causing everyone to stare at her like she's just committed treason.

"Lay, you're not supposed to be defending him," Amelia scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I'm not! He's absolutely in the wrong here, but I can kind of understand why he felt like he needed to stay," she defends.

"You're not wrong," I admit. "I completely understand why he wants to stay, but what I don't understand is why he doesn't want me with him. Why does he feel like he needs to make that decision for me?"

"Exactly what I'm trying to say," Layla clarifies. "He shouldn't be making that decision, but it also sounds like he's trying to put your needs first, knowing everything you'd be leaving if you stayed there with him. He doesn't want you to give up anything for him."

"Again," Charlie interjects, holding up a finger, "Not his call to make."

"I didn't even say goodbye to his Mom," I groan. "She must think I'm so self-centered."

"Have you called her or messaged her?" Layla questions.

"No," I say, hanging my head. "But I probably should. As painful as it is, I adore Rosie."

"Maybe she can talk some sense into him," Amelia suggests with a one-shouldered shrug. "Make him realize his mistake."

"Even if she did, Norie isn't going to take him back. He had his chance," Myra scoffs. "Right, Nor?"

All eyes turn to me and I hesitate. "Honestly? I don't know. I still love him and want to be with him, but even if he wanted me back, I'm not sure how we'd make a relationship work on two separate continents." Blowing out a frustrated breath, I rub my forehead with my fingertips. "This is all hypothetical anyway."

We spend the next few hours talking about everything but Eamon. Most of the conversation revolves around Myra and the baby. We talk about names, baby shower planning, and Mac's sweet reaction to finding out he was going to have a daughter. I don't miss how distracted Layla has been. Her eyes and fingers racing across the screen of her phone. Is she texting Teagan? Surely he's talked to Eamon by now. I'm desperate to ask, but can't seem to muster up the courage to do so. I'm too scared of the answer.

Later, after everyone but Layla leaves, I'm exhausted. The mental and emotional unloading was overwhelming and I just want to crawl back into the oblivion of sleep.

"Are you staying tonight, Lay?" I ask while pouring the last dregs of wine from a bottle down the drain.

"I had planned on it," she hedges. "Unless you want me to give you some space. It won't hurt my feelings either way."

"You can stay. I may head to bed soon, though. I want to get up early tomorrow and start designs for the spring production," I tell her with a shrug .

"Okay," she says, the corner of her mouth tipping up in a sympathetic smile.

We sit at the island in companionable silence for a few minutes before I just can't take it anymore.

"How are things with Teagan?" I ask suddenly.

Layla's eyes shoot to mine in alarm. "What?"

"Oh, come on. There's obviously something going on there, and you guys seem to talk all the time," I nod towards the phone in her hands.

"I was hoping you didn't notice that," she says with a grimace.

"It's okay," I tell her honestly. "You can talk to me about him. If you want. I still want to know what's going on with you."

She pulls her dark hair over her shoulder and starts braiding it absently. "Well…did you know that Eamon told Teagan to take the reservation for the rental in OBX?"

My head snaps up, and I gape at her. When had he done that? And why didn't he tell me? "What? No, I had no idea."

"Yeah," Layla continues, wringing her hands together. "Teagan invited me to join him, so I did. One thing led to another, and we… Yeah."

There's a stretch of silence while my brain processes this. When the information all clicks into place, I gasp loudly and grab Layla's arm.

"You slept together!"

Layla blushes deeply and looks away. When she finally brings her eyes back to mine, she's fighting a grin. She loses the battle and says, "Yeah, we did."

"Layla, this is amazing! I'm so happy for you! So, you're official now?" I ask, genuinely happy for her.

An ache fills my chest at the thought of not being able to double date with them, but I shove it aside to focus on Layla.

"Yeah, I guess we are," she says, exhaling heavily. "It seems surreal, you know? I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. I keep waiting for him to realize that I'm not anything like his ex and that he doesn't want me anymore."

"Not likely! Eamon said—" I stop short. Saying his name feels like being stabbed with a serrated knife.

Layla winces and reaches forward to grab my hand. "Hey, it's okay. Let's not talk about this anymore."

I nod, slipping off of the bar stool to give Layla a hug. "Yeah, I'm going to go to bed. Night."

I pad into my bedroom, each step feeling heavier than the last. Crawling into bed, I pull the covers over my head, and let the tears flow freely. How is it possible to feel so much for someone over the course of a few months? Eamon Kennedy embedded himself into my heart and soul so deeply, and I miss him. I miss talking and laughing with him. I miss having him in my bed, with his strong arms wrapped around me. I miss the weight of him and the feel of his lips on my skin. Burying my face into my pillow, I realize it still smells like him, and the ache in my heart intensifies, threatening to suffocate me. I throw the pillow across the room. I'll strip the sheets in the morning. Tomorrow, I'm determined to stop wallowing and move forward.

Eamon

"We got the results from Caity's latest scan, and we're pleased to see that the swelling in her brain has reduced significantly. So much so that we would like to start bringing her out of her coma tomorrow," Dr. Colm says, smiling at us.

Mam bursts into tears, and I release a huge sigh of relief. It's the first time I've felt something other than regret since Norah left.

"Oh, do you mean it?" Mam cries. "Will we finally be able to talk to her?"

"Well," Dr. Colm hesitates, "that would be the ideal situation. However, there's no guarantee that she'll be responsive. It could take anywhere from several hours to even a couple of days for her to fully wake. We don't want to rush her into consciousness, so we'll be gradually reducing the medications."

"‘Course." She sniffles. "I should have known better."

"Mam, it's okay. We're all anxious to see Caity awake," I tell her soothingly, wrapping an arm around her.

"No worries at all," Dr. Colm assures her. "We'll begin weaning her off the medication tomorrow morning around seven. I would recommend waiting a couple of hours before coming to visit. She will be under close and constant observation, and those first hours are critical. Of course, you're welcome to wait in the lobby if you decide to come in first thing."

"Thank you, Doctor. I'd like to be here just in case anything happens. Is that alright, Eamon?" she asks me.

"‘Course it is. We'll come whenever you want." It's not like I have anywhere else to be.

"Do you have any other questions for me, Rosie?" Dr. Colm asks, giving her elbow a lingering squeeze.

"Not that I can think of," she says with a shake of her head. "I'm just ready to see my Caity Bug's eyes open again."

"Absolutely. That's our goal," he says. "I'll see you in the morning, then."

"Thanks a million," she says, her eyes filled with hope. It's the brightest I've seen them in years.

After the doctor leaves the room, she turns her watery gaze towards me. She hasn't said much to me since learning that Norah left. When I told her what happened, she fully embraced her Irish Mam status and gave me a tongue-lashing like I hadn't experienced since I was a boy. I didn't realize that I could feel worse than I already did, but knowing how disappointed she is, guts me.

"Eamon," she chokes out, "do you think she'll come back to us, our Caity?"

I pull her in for a hug, resting my chin on the top of her head. "I don't know, Ma. I'd like to say she will without a doubt, but I honestly haven't any idea what to expect."

Taking a deep breath, she returns my embrace but says, "I'm glad you're here, son. Even if you are an eejit for letting that sweet girl walk away like that."

" Jaysus , Mam," I groan out. "I know I messed up. I wasn't thinking straight. If I could go back and change it, I would."

She pulls back, eyeing me sternly. "Eamon Seamus Kennedy. You listen to me. I want you to go back to the States. I love you for wanting to stay and take care of me, but I don't need you to stay here."

When I furrow my brow at her, she takes a deep breath before saying, "I've debated on telling you this, but I suppose it's time. We could have avoided all of this turmoil had I told you sooner. John—Dr. Colm—and I have been seeing each other for a while now. I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid you'd think I was dishonoring your father's memory. We've made no real plans, but things have become quite serious recently."

My jaw drops, leaving me gaping in shock. I thought something was going on between the two of them, but I just figured it was harmless flirting. To find out they've been seeing each other? I'm completely flabbergasted. And more than a little irritated.

"You're joking," I deadpan.

"No, love, I'm not," she says gently, squeezing my forearms. "We've been courting for about six months now, just enjoying each other's company. We didn't intend on getting serious, but as time has gone on, we've grown closer. He's a good man, Eamon. He'll never replace your Da, no one can, but he makes me happy and he treats me well."

"I can't believe you didn't tell me sooner," I mumble, rubbing my hands over my face. "I wouldn't begrudge you finding someone that makes you happy. Did Caity know?"

"No, she didn't. She was hardly ever around, and when she was, she barely talked to me."

I heave a sigh, looking over at my sister. I'm sleep deprived, feeling like an arse for what I did to Norah, and now I'm stunned by my mother's confession. I need a drink. "I'm not sure if I should be offended or not right now, Mam," I say, smiling wryly at her. She raises a brow at me in question. "My own mother basically told me to get the fuck out of here and leave the country," I tease her.

"Ach, you wee shite," she exclaims, playfully slapping my bicep. "That's not what I meant, and you know it. I'd be overjoyed to have you back in Ireland for good, but your heart isn't here, love. It flew to the States, and you need to get it back. If someday you and Norah decide to live here and give me grandchildren, I'd be the happiest woman in the world, but you belong with her."

There's a crushing sensation in my chest at the thought of raising a family with Norah in Ireland.

"I want to be with her," I say earnestly. "More than anything I've ever wanted before."

"I know, love. That's why you need to go back."

My mind is racing. I'm ready to hop on a plane right now, but I know I'm still needed here. "I will, but not until we know what's going on with Caity. That's non-negotiable."

She rests a hand on my cheek, smiling warmly. "There's a good lad."

"I want to ask you something though," I say nervously.

"Anything, my boy."