Chapter 36

36

SUTTON

C alen had been here. I knew it, even if I hadn’t seen him. There was a gnawing feeling in my gut as I helped my mom clean up after dinner, both of us quiet as we wondered why my dad and Henry weren’t back yet.

Laughter and chatter echoed from the living room while Hawk entertained the kids, but Emery finally glanced at me after sliding a few more plates into the dishwasher. “Do you think they’re okay?”

“They’ll be fine,” I said, but I didn’t sound particularly confident. I sighed, rinsing the cutlery before passing it to her to add to the load in the dishwasher. “At least, I hope they will be. They have to be, right? It’s two against one.”

“Two older men, one who’s pretty frail, against a young, healthy, and strong Scotsman. I don’t know if I like those odds,” she mumbled, worry in her eyes as she took the cutlery from me. “Where on earth do you think they went?”

“No idea,” I said, then shot a pointed look at my mother. “Do you know where they might’ve gone?”

Her features were drawn with worry of her own, her face only slightly ashen as she wiped down the counters. “No, but they will be fine. They’ve both been wanting to say a few things to Calen, and Hawk mentioned he was three sheets to the wind. I’m sure they just didn’t want him around the children.”

My stomach churned with fear, but there was also gratitude deep in my soul. Winnie had loved the day so far and it would’ve destroyed her if Calen had come in and made a mess of the whole holiday. Unfortunately, she was far too familiar with him being intoxicated and I knew how embarrassed she would’ve been if her new friends had seen him that way.

Mom, Emery, and I all fell silent again, working quietly. Finally, Dad and Henry walked back in. As soon as they did, Mom raced over, but Emery and I exchanged a glance and she arched an eyebrow at me. Both the older men were looking smug as hell, but as Mom approached them, she suddenly sucked in a sharp, loud gasp.

“David! What on earth have you done to your knuckles? Is that blood ?”

I blanched, but when I focused on my father’s hands, I saw that he did, in fact, have bloodied knuckles. Emery’s eyebrows shot up and she raced over to her father. “Daddy, are you hurt? What happened?”

“Relax.” Dad chuckled, hugging Mom, but he shooed her away when she tried to get another look at his hands. “We’re both fine. Just had a little errand to run. Is there any food leftover?”

“I made you each a plate,” Mom said, not looking happy about it but obviously deciding to let them eat before she launched into her inquisition.

As she and Emery backed off to go warm up their food, Dad strode over to me, a soft smile on his lips as he leaned in to speak quietly and discreetly into my ear. “Calen is going back to Scotland. We took him back to the inn to get his shit and then dropped him on his ass at the airport. He won’t be bothering you or Winnie anymore.”

My heart stammered. “You did what?”

“You know, Hawk isn’t as bad as I thought.” Dad winked at me as he started backing away. “I need to get Henry another beer. I owe him one.”

Spinning around, he headed over to the fridge to grab some more drinks, then strode into the dining room with Henry, Mom, and Emery so the men could finally eat. Disbelief made my head feel hollow. I finished cleaning up by myself, happy for something to do while animated conversation started up in the dining room.

The rest of the night was a bit of a blur, but when the Brunsons got ready to leave, I snapped myself out of it. I wasn’t letting Hawk go home tonight before I knew what the hell he’d meant when he’d told my mom he was going back to California.

I’d known it was coming, of course, but after hearing everything about him taking over his father’s company, I’d hoped that would mean he was staying. Or at least splitting his time between the two states.

As I strode out of the kitchen to find him, I saw him heading toward me. He shot me a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Can we talk outside for a minute?”

“Sure.” I inclined my head toward the kitchen. “Let’s go out back. Everyone else will be on the front porch soon.”

“Good idea.” He fell into step beside me, his hands sliding into his pockets as I shut the door behind us.

We stood a couple feet apart, but neither of us moved to close the distance. I wrapped my arms around myself, my heart hammering against my ribs as I tried bracing for the inevitable. “So, you’re really going back, huh?”

“I have to go handle all the details of buying my dad’s company and incorporating it into mine. I’ve done as much as I could from here, but at some point, I need to be in the room with my people to put the final pieces of the puzzle in place.”

“Of course. Yeah. I understand.” Cracks began running through my heart, preparing for it to split right open.

I knew what was coming next. He would say something like, Well, this has been fun, but this is it . He’d probably give me a hug and then leave, going back to his glitzy life in LA first thing in the morning without looking back.

My jaw locked as I tried to fight the emotions rising up within me. I felt the urge to yell at him that I didn’t understand why he’d pursued me in the first place, making me fall in love with him all over again if he was just going to walk away.

“Obviously, I want to keep seeing you,” he said, eyes burning into mine. “I’m not sure exactly how long I’ll be gone this time, but I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

I blinked hard, confusion ricocheting around inside me. “Uh, I’m sorry. What?”

He frowned. “What, what?”

“You’re coming back?” I felt my heart thrumming in my throat. “What about your company and?—”

“Sutton,” he said, his voice quiet but filled with amusement. He finally pulled his hands out of his pockets and stepped into me. “Shit, apparently, none of that came out right. I’m taking over my dad’s company.”

“Sure. I got that part.”

“I’m not going to be running it from LA, which is why I have to go back there to put all the final details in place. Gold Star’s headquarters will remain in California for now, but I’m also going back to oversee all the logistics of moving my base of operations here.”

My mouth dried up. Everything he was saying was exactly what I’d been dreaming about hearing, but it felt surreal. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. “You’re moving home?”

“Eventually.” He reached for my hands and twined our fingers together, tugging me into him as he gave me a beautiful, amused smile. “You thought I was leaving for good? Just like that?”

I held his gaze, too afraid that he would change his mind if I so much as moved a muscle. “Well, I mean, I hoped you wouldn’t, but I didn’t know for sure what was going on and your life is there and?—”

“ Was there,” he corrected lightly. “My life was there, but it’s here now. I want to be with you, Sutton. I want to make it official. I want you to be my girlfriend and I want us to build our lives together. I thought I told you that.”

“Yeah, you did, but I…” I didn’t have a clue how to react, so instead, I simply peered up at him. “Are you sure?”

“About what?”

“About us, Hawk.” I lifted both my eyebrows, clinging to his hands but still not really able to believe that this was happening. “I’m a divorcee who comes with a kid. I’m working at my family’s bookstore and I’m planning on doing that for at least the next year while I figure out how to support myself and Winnie and to get on my own two feet again. I’m not exactly a catch.”

“I suppose it’s a good thing you’re not a fish then,” he joked, leaning in and bringing his forehead down to my own. “As long as you and Winnie will have me, I want nothing more than to have you both in my life. I know that me having to go back to LA makes things a little more complicated, but it won’t be for too long. I’ll be here again before you know it, and in the meantime, we’ll talk every day. We’ll text. We’ll do video chats. I…” He trailed off, inhaling deeply as he gazed at me like I was all he could see. “I wouldn’t be leaving Portsmouth if I didn’t have to, but I’m not leaving you, Sutton. Not unless you tell me that you don’t want the same things I do, and even then, I’m hoping we can work it out.”

As I looked back at him, part of me wondered if I was setting myself up for heartbreak again. Here was a man saying he wanted to be with me, but he was also jetting off to sunny California any day now and he didn’t know when he would be back.

When he got there, he’d be surrounded by glitz and glamour, those parties and clubs he’d mentioned before. He’d be living in his four thousand square feet of awesome again, and once that happened, there was no guarantee he’d want to come back to live the quiet, domestic life with Winnie and me here, in Portsmouth.

There would be supermodels and socialites to entertain and great business deals to be done. All of which he’d admittedly gotten caught up in before.

As much as all of that was a possibility, however, I smiled and took his face between my hands, completely confident in my answer as I brought my lips to his. “We’ll be right here, waiting for you.”

Sliding my arms around his neck, I kissed him and he kissed me back, slanting his mouth over mine and deepening the kiss until it stole the breath from my lungs and my heart had climbed right back into my chest.

Despite everything that could happen, Hawk wouldn’t break my heart again. I didn’t know how I knew that, but I did.

Ever since we’d re-entered each other’s lives, he’d been trying to make up for what had happened before and to earn my trust back, and he’d done it. I trusted him enough to give him my whole heart unreservedly because, while he was a man who’d be jetting off to California soon, he was also the man I loved.

The man I’d always loved.

I had fallen in love with him as soon as romantic love had become something I’d realized I could feel, and while life had happened for a while, I knew now that I would always love him. We’d both gone our separate ways, but fate had brought us back together, and now that it had, I was never letting him go again.

Well, except to California. He does need to go there.

Groaning into my mouth as he slowed the kiss to a natural end, his palm rested on the side of my throat as he opened his eyes to look into mine. “Talk to Winnie and let me know what she says, okay? Good night, Sutton.”

“Good night, Hawk.” I tipped my head back and he dropped another quick kiss on my lips, but then he tore himself away, striding over to the kitchen door and opening it for us both.

Feeling like I was floating on air, I let out a dreamy sigh and wrapped my arms around myself, desperately needing a moment alone to attempt to process all this. As I turned to follow him inside, however, I noticed my mom and Winnie in the kitchen.

They were standing at the window, and judging by the disgusted look on Winnie’s face, they’d been there for a while. My heart dropped, my stomach suddenly swirling with nausea. I almost tripped over my own feet in my haste to get inside, stumbling into the kitchen just in time to hear Winnie’s comment to my mom.

“Mam has cooties now.”

Hawk chuckled and ruffled her hair as he walked past her. “Good night, Win. We’ll talk soon, okay?”

She beamed at him, clearly not afraid of catching his cooties as she launched herself at him for a hug. He laughed and scooped her up once more, holding her close for a moment before he set her back down on her feet and waved at my mom.

“Good night, Mindy. Thank you for an incredible meal and a wonderful day. We owe you. Next year is on us, okay?”

“That’s what Emery said too,” I said but Hawk just laughed and nodded, blowing me another kiss before he walked away.

I grabbed onto the closest counter to steady myself, my knees much weaker than they should’ve been. Mom glanced at me with love and laughter in her eyes before she smacked the side of my thigh with a dishtowel.

“Come on, lovebird. We’re almost done here. Then we’ll go sit down and you can tell Winnie and me all about it.”