Chapter 28

Two and twenty and engaged. It was every young lady's dream.

It would have been, at least, if her suitor was not twice her age. Not quite twice her age, her mother chirped time and time again, as he was only forty, but there was something in the way she emphasized that he was only forty that deeply unsettled Olivia.

She hated how she was to marry someone almost the same age as her father, and that nobody had blinked twice about it. It was as though it was a happy occasion, with the household abuzz for the first time. A wedding was to take place, and all was going to be brilliant.

The journey back to London had been mostly silent, with Olivia knowing that she would immediately be attending a ball. She had spent but a week in their home in Bolton, and had been shipped away specifically to meet her betrothed.

"Are you ready for this evening, dearest?" Her father asked, "Lord Buckingham has asked that you wear yellow this evening, as it is his favorite."

"Oh, I had planned to wear green. I am aware of a gown that is in our London home that will still fit me."

"That is quite alright, we had a gown prepared for you. I told you, this will go off without a hitch."

And without a hitch it had gone off indeed. He had sifted through his contacts, picked a gentleman of reasonable breeding, a second son that was supposedly young at heart, at least he was young in that respect, that whilst was not set to inherit a title of any kind had a sizeable fortune and excellent connections.

That was all the viscount had been searching for.

"Does he even want to marry?" She asked, not thinking.

"He hardly would have proposed if he did not."

"Well, he has not exactly proposed to me."

"No, but he has agreed to marry you and that is a proposal enough for me. Why are you trying to find fault? You agreed to marry whomever I found for you."

"And I will, but you have to wonder why he is… of his age… and not yet married. I have to admit, I did wonder if he had already been married once before, and his wife had died of some illness."

"No, nothing of the sort has happened. It is more the case that he never wished to marry. Frankly, he still does not, but he has agreed to it regardless and so you ought to be quite grateful to him for that."

She was, and she wasn't. There was certainly something to be said about a gentleman that married in spite of what he wanted, especially at his age. She wondered why he had changed his mind, given the fact that he was not a firstborn. He had no need, so to speak, to sire an heir or any such duties.

At least she would be able to ask him that evening.

One of the many surprises she had received during her stay there was a welcome one. Thomas was still there. Her father had warned her the morning after she arrived that he was not to be spoken to under any circumstances, but he had quickly softened when his daughter had so willingly agreed to marry the first gentleman that he had found for her.

"You may speak with him," he said gruffly, "Only briefly, and in full view of others. There shall be no tempting scandal. Am I clear?"

"Yes, Father," she beamed before racing towards the stables.

"Thomas!" She called, and the young man stepped out from behind a mare.

He hadn't changed at all since they had last seen each other. She wondered if she had, or at least if it was at all visible.

"Olivia?" He asked, in utter disbelief, "What are you doing back here? You cannot be seen!"

"Oh, do not worry," she laughed, "My father knows I am here. In fact, I am surprised that you do not. Anyway, he has told me that I can come and speak to you, so long as we do not destroy my reputation any further."

"Then we must try not to," he smirked, "How have you been? Where did you go?"

"I stayed with a friend of my mother's. She was very kind to me, and treated me as her own. I had been very happy there until recently, but I decided it was time to come home and grovel until they made a match for me on the marriage mart."

"And have they succeeded?"

"In spite of the fact that I am damaged goods, yes. A Lord Buckingham. I am to meet him tonight for the first time, and we will be married within the week."

"They managed to have a special license accepted? How did they do that?"

"I am not too sure. Actually, Father says it has not yet been accepted, but he is sure that they were convincing enough. If not, then I suppose he will cart me off to Gretna Green and have it done that way. He is certainly invested in this."

"And are you?"

"Of course not, but at this point I have no other options. It is either Lord Buckingham or a life on the streets. I have nothing else."

"You have me."

"Yes, I have you."

"It is a shame that they all thought there was something more than friendship between us, you know."

"I know. It has been something that I never quite understood. Perhaps they saw that we were of a similar age and assumed something untoward, but you are like a brother to me. You always have been."

"And you will always be like a sister to me. I have truly missed you, Olivia."

"Why did they keep you here? I do not mean to be unkind, but they had me taken away immediately."

"They blamed you entirely. They said you were a wanton, and that I was the best stable hand they could find, and so all was forgiven."

"You would think they would have defended their own daughter, but I suppose my parents have never really cared for such things as blood."

"I would say it is because I am inexpensive, as far as help goes, and not a reflection of you."

"I suppose. Well, either way the past is in the past and soon it will not matter regardless. I will be Lady Buckingham with my many children and I shall not have time to see my wonderful parents anyway. That is likely what they want, at least, and so I might do something to please them for once."

"They missed you. Even your father. Servants talk, you know. He used to sigh to himself whenever you were mentioned, and he forbade us from saying your name in his presence, if at all, but sometimes the maids would go to clean and he would be crying. He would send them away immediately, of course, but he had already been seen."

"Then maybe had he not been so proud, all of this could have been avoided."

"To be sure, but then you would not have had your adventure with the dowager duchess. You were happy there, were you not? In the grand scheme of things, no matter how it ended, at least you had the experience. That will not go anywhere."

"You're right," she sighed, "I do miss her already, but I will see her again. Perhaps I will visit with my husband, although he is more of her age than anything. I cannot stand that. It feels wrong."

"Then why are you marrying him?"

"Because I promised to. That was our deal, my father allowed me to return home, and find me a husband, and I would accept the first offer I received. He held his end, and now I must hold mine."

"Even if you do not want to?"

"It no longer matters what I want. It is quite alright, I am resigned to my fate. I can only hope that he is kind, which my mother has assured me that he is."

"You have changed. You never would have accepted this before."

"I was not desperate before. I am now. If I want any sort of life for myself, then this is what I must do."

"In which case I wish you all the best," he smiled, "You always were my best friend, Olivia, I would never want you to be unhappy."

"And I feel the same for you. Do you suppose that you will ever marry?"

"That is hardly something for a gentleman in my position, but it isn't something that I would refuse should the opportunity ever arise."

"In which case I hope that it does," she smiled, "I must go. I have a ball to prepare for and if I hope to make my father happy then I require every minute that I can grab."

"I wish you luck! Go and find the gentleman of your dreams, and everything that you could ever want and more. Or, at least, a gentleman that can give you a good life."

"A good life," she nodded, "I think that will be enough for me."

She hated lying to him.

As promised, her parents had arranged for a bright yellow gown to be delivered and it fit perfectly. It would have been a favorite of hers had it not been so… yellow.

"A happy gown for a happy young lady," her mother smiled brightly, "Lord Buckingham shall love it."

"But do I look nice in it?"

"You mustn't worry about looks, dearest. Your suitor is aware of your beauty and a gown will not change that."

"That is to say that I do not. Is that it?"

"Well, it is not particularly easy to look nice in yellow, but when all is said and done I would say you look lovely. Then again, I am your mother and therefore rather biased."

"Oh, Mother, what if he changes his mind? What will Father say?"

"If Lord Buckingham changes his mind, then we will find another suitor. You will not be to blame. Who knows? Perhaps he will pity you."

"Father?"

"Lord Buckingham. I am not stupid, Olivia. I know that you are uneasy about his age. It is entirely possible that he shall feel the same, especially given his reasoning for not wanting to marry all this time."

"What is that reason?"

"He says he has not found a lady capable of holding a conversation with him. He says they are all meek and simpering and he cannot stand it. Your father says he shall like you very much in that respect, though you must stay respectful all the same."

"Then perhaps I will not find him utterly insufferable."

"Exactly. I know that this is frightening, dearest, but you must understand that we are doing what we think is best for you. We want you to be happy, and we will do everything that we can to make that happen."

"I am grateful," she said gently, smoothing her skirts, "I know that I have been complaining quite a lot, but that is only because I am nervous. I truly am so grateful to you and Father for what you are doing for me in spite of everything."

"We would do anything for you. Your father might not express such a sentiment very well, but it is true. We love you, dearest."

"And I love you too. I hope that this evening goes well, and I hope that Lord Buckingham is kind, and I hope that our marriage is at least amicable. I cannot ask for more than that."

"And it will make you a very happy lady indeed."

Happy. That was all she wanted to be.

She had expected the stares when she entered the ballroom. It was not a surprise to her that all in attendance turned in her direction and watched her, nor that several people were smirking. She had been waiting for it. A young lady did not leave London under such circumstances only to return and reenter the marriage mart, not easily at least.

"And in that awful gown," one young lady sniggered, "As if she needed to be so garish in order to attract attention."

"That is what she wants, isn't it? Truly, she has no shame."

Olivia did not want attention. She wanted to arrive, meet her betrothed, have a single amiable conversation and then leave. She focused on said gentleman, scanning the ballroom for him. She did not know truly what she was looking for, beyond an old man that would be standing alone.

"Lord Staunton!" A man called brightly, and that was when she saw him.

He was not particularly hideous looking. In fact, if he were her age, he might have even been seen as quite handsome, indeed. He must have had quite the struggle in not marrying, given how many young ladies must have tried.

"Lord Buckingham, it is so good to see you," her father beamed, "This is my daughter, Miss Staunton."

"Good evening, My Lord," she said gently with a curtsy.

"Now, now, there is no need for such formalities," he laughed, "Given the circumstances, I would almost think it best that you call me by my first name."

"I would prefer to keep the formalities," she replied, having that belief for the first time in her life.

"Then we shall do that. It is no trouble at all. Now, if you do not mind, Miss Staunton, I would like to speak with you for a while, and get to know you a little."

There was an ease about him, and a kindness. He was exactly what she had been hoping for, if she had to marry a man such as himself. He was certainly young at heart too, just as she had been told. He would have been perfect, but he was not.

He was not the duke.