Chapter Thirteen

Tanitha stirred with the first moment of wakefulness. She was seated upright against a smooth, hard stone surface, her right shoulder pressed against what felt like a metal bar. Strangely, she felt more at peace than she had in recent memory. Her hand was wrapped in something warm, and—

She went perfectly still. Her hand was wrapped in someone else's. And its contours and firm, solid strength felt very familiar.

Her eyes flew open. She was in a cell, dark and unfamiliar to her, but she hardly even registered that. To her utter astonishment, she was directly beside Prince Darius.

Though the room was dim, lit only by a single oil lamp, her breath caught to look at him. He was asleep, sitting against the same stone wall as she was. A row of iron bars separated them, though her hand was nestled in both of his.

She knew his face well enough from images of the royal family, but this was only the second time she had seen him in person. She blinked back tears at the recollection of the first time, that terrible moment of betrayal and pain. But just then, his face was peaceful, and for a moment, she could only look at him, her heart feeling full to bursting. The flickering lamplight highlighted his features, his strong jaw and his angular cheekbones. His lips were slightly parted, and Tanitha's breath caught again, remembering each kiss that they'd shared, each gentle caress they'd exchanged.

"Darius," she whispered, hardly able to believe that this might be real, that he might truly be there in front of her.

His eyes flitted open, and Tanitha's hand tensed on his, once again remembering the last time they'd been together, the pain and anger. But when his amber, gold-flecked eyes met hers, she saw only an intense, tender affection.

"You're back," he said, his voice heavy with relief. "Gods, Tanitha, I thought— I thought I'd lost you." He reached up as if to caress her cheek, then drew back with a wince just as a flare of elemental magic sizzled briefly. A one-way shield, Tanitha realized. Similar to what had surrounded Darius' Hold. She could apparently reach into the cell, but he couldn't extend so much as a hand through it.

He returned his hand to hers, and the gentle pressure brought tears to her eyes. She almost reached up to touch his face, then went still, the barrage of words she was desperate to say jostling so badly in her mind that she couldn't manage any of them.

"Darius," she began, a waver of pain in her voice, "I'm…"

He pressed one finger to his lips, casting a meaningful look to the front of the room. Tanitha followed his gaze, perplexed, then realized they weren't alone. Prince Kaion was there, apparently asleep, on a bench, his grey wings draping nearly to the floor.

"Try not to wake him," Darius said quietly. "He's here as a precaution against you issuing any orders. They're still convinced that you're dangerous to me. I don't know how he and Alethia persuaded my mother to allow this, but somehow they did. You should feign sleep if he wakes." He dropped his hand to her forearm. "Ashen Halls, I've been frightened," he murmured.

Tanitha was still struggling to remember what had happened, how she possibly could have awakened here, but she could only summon up fractured, nonsensical memories, and none of them seemed anywhere near as important as what she could remember.

"Darius, I'm so, so sorry," she said. The tears she'd been fighting back began to flow immediately with the words, and she bowed her head. "I never wanted— If I'd known—"

"No. Don't apologize," he said, his voice low but firm. "I'm the one who should be begging your forgiveness."

Tanitha shook her head, almost angrily. "I should have trusted you, should have just spoken with you. But I was too afraid, and—"

"You wouldn't have been so afraid if I hadn't been lying to you from the start," he said, pained. " I'm sorry. I'm sorry I left you. I never, never should have done that. This… everything that's happened to you, it's because of me." He turned slightly away as if to gather himself, the lamplight casting his noble silhouette into relief. Tanitha swallowed back more tears. After several seconds, he turned back, the slightest hint of tears shining in his eyes, too. "It wasn't your fault, Tanitha."

It was too much. The tears began to flow fast and hard, and her shoulders shook with the effort of holding her silence. She didn't know what she had expected— perhaps she hadn't even allowed herself to consider the matter, too afraid that she might never see him again. But she never would have dared to hope for the forgiveness he so readily gave.

"It's all right. It's all right," he murmured, which only made the tears come harder. She slumped, her head resting against the bars, and he gently stroked the hair over her forehead, the only part of her that he could reach without triggering the warding enchantment once more. A stifled sob wracked her body, and he lightly kissed her forehead. "It's all right," he murmured once more.

They simply remained that way for what felt like a long time, Tanitha gripping his hand as if she would never let go, Darius murmuring gentle comfort. Finally, when she'd managed to still the trembles of restraining her own sobs, she looked up to meet his eyes once more. The gentle compassion she found there almost left her undone once more, but she shored herself up. She didn't know how much time they had, and she wouldn't spend more of it weeping than she could help. There would be time enough for that later, she was certain.

"How… you were asleep," she said uncertainly, with a glance toward Prince Kaion as well, who hadn't moved. "You both were."

Darius reached behind himself, tapping the dark stone wall. "Basalt," he said, by way of explanation. "It dampens our abilities, including shapeshifting. It's practically impossible to accidentally shift when we're surrounded by it like this. There's little risk of slipping into our true forms in sleep."

"Does it hurt you?" Tanitha asked, pained herself at the thought. "Not being able to return to your true form for so long… does that hurt you?"

"Not as such," he said. "It's… aggravating, yes, but no more than that. But you shouldn't be worried about me right now."

"How could I not be?" she asked, anguish slipping into her tone once more. "They imprisoned you because of what I did."

"They imprisoned me because I played the part of the fool for far too long," he said, his volume low but his tone still firm and brooking no disagreement. "You don't own any fault in this." Tanitha almost protested, but then he continued, his expression softening, "Tanitha… They said that you surrendered yourself. That you offered your freedom for mine." Tanitha nodded, and his hand tightened on hers. "I never would have asked that of you," he said quietly. "I'd hoped… when they said you had escaped, I'd hoped that you would run, that you'd be able to find safe harbor somewhere."

She took a shivering breath. "I couldn't just leave you to suffer for what I'd done," she said. "I knew I should run. I knew this would end badly for me if I didn't. But…" Her voice broke slightly. "I couldn't. I just couldn't."

He tightened his hold again for a few seconds. "How are you feeling?" he asked her finally. "You were… Depths of the Abyss, I was frightened. You weren't well."

Tanitha shivered again. "What happened?" she asked. "I can't remember how I got here."

"Alethia," he said, his voice hard. "She… I told her none of this was your fault, that you hadn't wronged her. I practically begged her not to take vengeance on you. And she still…" He closed his eyes for several seconds, then turned to face her directly. "Do you remember the Trial?"

Tanitha frowned. She remembered pacing in front of the dunes of grain, considering her options, then the sudden bolt of inspiration or madness that had taken her. And then…

She sat up. "Did I pass it?" she asked urgently, though she made sure to keep her voice low, painfully aware that this might be her only opportunity to speak with him privately— or at all— for some time. "I don't remember the end, but…"

"You did," he said. She slumped with relief. "Kai told me that much. But… Tanitha, what happened?" he asked. "Was it dangerous, what they asked you to do?"

Tanitha shook her head. "Not dangerous," she said. "Just impossible." He looked at her intently, waiting. "Do you remember… when you fought your mother, one of you struck the warehouses with the grains?"

He pressed his hand to his forehead with a grimace. "Yes. That was… unfortunate. But what…?" He trailed off, and his amber eyes widened as he returned his gaze to her suddenly. "Ashen Halls, they wanted you to fix that?"

"Your mother told me to salvage the grain supply," Tanitha replied. He leaned back in apparent stunned disbelief. "I wasn't sure what to do at first," she continued. "In the end, I used sparrows."

He blinked twice. "Sparrows," he repeated. He sat slightly back, regarding her. "Enough grain to feed the city for weeks and you… used sparrows." She nodded, and he let out a low, disbelieving laugh. "Gods," he murmured. "You're incredible."

Tanitha, who'd half expected him to be angry at her for overextending herself, pressed herself close to the bars. He did the same, and despite the separation, she took comfort in what little of his warmth she could feel.

His hands were so tight around hers that it was almost painful, but she wouldn't have asked him to loosen them for anything. For a time, they remained in silence, and then he spoke.

"Tanitha…" he said, his voice still soft. "It's true, about the baby?"

She felt tears prick her eyes. "It's true," she said. "I wish… I wish I'd just told you."

"It wasn't your fault," he said again, his tone heartbreakingly gentle. "You were right that night, when you said I had asked too much of you, that I kept you in darkness for too long." He took a slow breath. "There's something I need to tell you. Kai said that my mother told you that I'd offered to let you be bound to me. And I did offer that, though I would have liked to have done so in… well, virtually any other circumstances," he said, with a weary motion that encapsulated the cell and the situation at large. "I couldn't see a path, though. I hadn't even told you who I was, and I didn't know if you would want to be with a prince, possibly even a disinherited prince, and…"

"Disinherited?" Tanitha asked, confused.

"I was exploring abdication as an option," he said with a flick of one hand. Tanitha leaned back, stunned. He'd… he'd been considering abdicating his claim to the throne? For her?

"Those last few weeks… I thought I might go mad," he said quietly. "I knew I wanted to be with you, but every path to that end seemed like it would endanger you. I thought perhaps if I renounced my claim, my mother wouldn't view you as such a threat, and she'd leave us in peace. But… obviously when I told her that a few days ago…"

Tanitha bit her lip. Naratha would have assumed that something as drastic as an intention to abdicate was evidence that Tanitha was controlling Darius. But that was far from the most salient thing he'd just said.

"You shouldn't have to give up your whole life for me," she said.

He gave a soft laugh. "In principle, I agree that I shouldn't have to," he said, giving her hand a gentle caress. "But if it would protect you, if it would allow us to be together… I'd do it in a heartbeat. But what I wanted to tell you is that I didn't suggest the Trials. I never would have asked that of you." He pressed the heel of his hand against his forehead for a moment. "I just needed you to know that," he said. "That I never would have asked for you to do anything that risked any danger to you. I swear it."

She reached out to take his hand in both of hers, holding it tight for several seconds. "Darius," she said. "A moment ago, you said that your mother viewed me as a threat even before… all this," she said. Darius went suddenly still, his gaze glancing away from hers. Nonetheless, Tanitha pressed on. "She was the one who ordered you to kill me that night, wasn't she?" she asked softly. He gave a reluctant nod. "Why?" she asked, heart pounding. "Why did she want me dead?"

He was silent for several seconds, indecision clear in his gaze. "I would rather not answer that," he said at last. Tanitha looked at him incredulously. There were a thousand things she could have said to that, but she held her peace until he continued. "Because…" He trailed off, visibly in conflict with himself, then sighed before meeting her eyes again. "I'm afraid what that information might drive you to do," he said.

It occurred to Tanitha, very briefly, that the soul-binding between them meant that she could probably just order him to answer, but she rejected the thought forcefully. She wasn't going to do that to him. Not today, not ever.

So instead, she just quietly said, "I think we've already learned what happens when we keep secrets from each other, Darius."

He was silent for several seconds, then gave a reluctant nod, conceding the point. "The day before you were brought to the necropolis," he said finally, "the oracles had gone to her with news of a human woman destined to grow greatly in strength," he said. Tanitha straightened, surprised. "You, obviously," he said with a shrug, though Tanitha would have called that anything but obvious. Or at least, she would have before she'd relocated enough grain to feed a city, she thought, stifling a small shiver.

"I proposed that we mentor you, monitor you to ensure that you weren't a threat in the meantime," Darius said. "But my mother wouldn't hear of it. She said it was too dangerous, that someone with that sort of destiny wouldn't be content to serve. Only to rule." He sighed. "And then… I couldn't do it," he said. "I looked at you and I couldn't hurt you. I told myself I would obey the order if it became clear that she was right, if it became clear that you were a threat, but that never happened. And…in truth, even if it had, I don't think I could have made myself harm you." He bowed his head. "It was why I couldn't tell you who I was," he said. "If I had, you would have had little doubt who gave that order. And I was afraid that someone with a destiny like yours would seek vengeance. I was afraid of what you might be capable of. And every time I looked at you… every time I looked at you, I knew if that happened, I wouldn't be able to make myself try to stop you."

Tanitha had to remind herself to breathe. So. She'd been marked to rise, and Naratha had attempted to cut her down in response. She held herself close, trying to assess her own feelings. Surely… surely she should feel furious at how badly she'd been wronged?

But peculiarly, she couldn't seem to call any anger up. Instead, she thought back to her own choices throughout her life. Her fear of falling in love because of the words of someone she hadn't even been certain was an oracle. Her determination to see Darius in his true form out of that same fear.

Tanitha had been trying to protect her own heart, but Naratha? Naratha had been trying to protect the lives of thousands. And they'd both done what they had on the whispered half-truths from messengers of gods that were heedless of the destruction that such messages could sow.

Tanitha closed her eyes. A part of her thought that anything resembling empathy for Naratha was a luxury she couldn't afford; the demon queen was both immensely powerful and highly motivated to end Tanitha's life. But at the same time, when she thought of the look of pain and betrayal in Darius' gaze that moment she'd soul-bound him… when that memory came to her mind's eye, she couldn't view herself as any better than Naratha.

She turned back to Darius. "What can we do?" she asked softly. "If she truly believes I'm dangerous, is there any way to convince her that I don't pose a threat to her? To… to any of you?"

He slowly shook his head. "I've done everything I can to that end already," he said. "If you're bound to me, if I can persuade her that I truly do care for you, that might be enough. But my mother isn't the main problem right now." He passed a hand briefly over his face. "Alethia is."

Tanitha swallowed. "I don't understand," she said. "Alethia… I don't understand why she's doing what she's doing." Why she'd insisted on the Trials, why she'd bothered to see that Tanitha recovered from the last one.

Darius was staring at the ground. "I do," he said. He closed his eyes for several seconds as if against a rise of pain. "A few nights ago, she came here to speak to me," he said. "She told me that the cruelest thing I could have possibly done to her was offer her false hope. And that if she found some way to wound me, she'd take it." He couldn't seem to meet Tanitha's gaze. "That's what this is about to her," he said. "She wants you to do the Trials to offer me false hope."

Tanitha leaned back, realization making her stomach sink. In realizing that she had passed her first Trial, Tanitha had begun to think that perhaps there was some chance for her to be with Darius. And despite how rapidly her feelings toward the words of oracles were turning toward angry disdain, a small part of her had rallied further when he'd spoken of her alleged destiny. But if the Trials were Alethia's doing… if Alethia herself was arbitrating…

"She won't allow me to win," Tanitha said, feeling cold.

Darius' grip on her hands was tight. "I'm going to fix this," he said. "I don't care what it takes. I'm going to protect you."

Tanitha managed a shivering breath, then sat up to look at him, to meet his eyes. "How?"

He drew her in slightly, though the bars remained a painful separation between them. "I don't know," he said. "We'll find a way."

Tanitha pulled back, just far enough to meet his eyes. "We already know what has to happen," she said. "Alethia or no, I have to complete the Trials." Darius started to shake his head, and she pressed on, "It's the only way. If I don't, they'll execute me."

"They will not ," Darius said, his voice low but forceful. "I won't allow that."

"You can't stop them," Tanitha said. "Not from in here."

He pursed his lips. "No," he said. "I can't stop them. But I can make it excruciatingly clear to them what the consequences of harming you will be."

A dark chill ran down Tanitha's spine. There had been moments, many of them, where she had briefly forgotten what he was, what kind of power he wielded. The forms he could take, the destruction he could wreak.

She thought of his altercation with his mother, the destruction he'd dealt to surroundings that hadn't even been his target. Looking into his eyes that moment, she saw a type of smoldering fury that she could barely comprehend. She didn't know precisely what he might be willing to do if she were killed. But she knew that no one wanted to see that day. The day that a mighty city burned in her name.

That was another path, she realized, feeling sick. Another path to the fulfilment of her alleged destiny. One where her power was in the influence she had over this man, in the hold she had over his heart.

The oracles had only said that she would rise to great heights of power. What greater height was there than having one's mere memory be enough to change the course of a nation's history?

She forced herself to breathe. "Darius… please," she said. "Whatever happens, promise me… can you please just promise me that you won't hurt anyone?" she said, fighting back tears.

He looked at her, his gaze tightly focused and intense. "Why," he asked, voice low, "would I make a promise that protects people trying to harm you?"

"Darius, please ," she said again, though her heart was aching at the determination she saw in his gaze. The determination to see her safe from all harm.

"I don't want my legacy to be one of blood and pain," she continued. "I need to do the Trials," she said. "It's the only way."

"Tanitha. They will kill you ," he insisted. "You have to see this. You have to know how convenient your cooperation would be for them, for Alethia and my mother. They get to appear magnanimous and forward-thinking by announcing the engagement, by allowing you into a space that normally could only be taken by a demon woman. There are probably palace criers singing praises of your skills and intelligence even now, since you completed the first Trial. But Alethia will not let you win. And when you fail, she'll be able to claim that their hands bear none of your blood."

"I am not going to fail," Tanitha said flatly.

He shook his head once, the motion short with anger and fear. "You need to see the truth here," he said, voice tense. "No matter what the oracles said about your fate, this path leads to your death. You must understand that. This is the other reason I didn't want to tell you what they'd said. People die from overconfidence when they think destiny protects them!"

"I don't care what the oracles said," Tanitha said, too loudly. Darius made a hushing motion with a glance toward Prince Kaion, who'd stirred slightly.

Tanitha forced herself to take a breath before continuing, her voice much lower. "Oracles and prophecies and fate, they've only ever brought me pain," she said, blinking back tears. "More than what you know. I've fallen into the trap of thinking I understood them before, that I could avoid the pain they told me I was destined to find. And the truth is that if I'd just trusted myself the last time, if I'd just used my own good sense and judgement instead, I never would have found the pain the oracles claimed I was destined to suffer in the first place."

She paused for a moment, but he didn't speak. Instead, he watched her wordlessly, a frown creasing his forehead as he waited for her to continue. She wrapped her arms around herself for a second before slipping her hands back through the bars, where he enfolded them within his own. Tanitha took just a moment to let the sense of stability that came from his touch wash over her, then spoke again.

"I am going to pretend you never told me what the oracles said," she said, her tone level and determined. "I am going to pretend that I know nothing of my own fate. Because the truth is that I don't . I only know a few vague words that could mean almost anything, and trying to force events to match it in a way that's acceptable to me, to us, will only end in more pain." She shook her head. "I don't care about greatness or destiny. I care about you, I care about me, and I care about our child. And I only see one path where all three of us survive. Where we can be together." She took a stiff breath, then met Darius' eyes, his amber irises gleaming in the lamplight. His expression was set with steely determination, but she couldn't tell which way the determination tilted, if she'd persuaded him or not.

She tightened her grip on his hands. "I am doing the Trials, Darius," she said, forcing her voice to carry a calm confidence that she didn't feel. "It's the only way we can fix this."

Darius was silent for several seconds. Then, loudly, he said, "Kai."

Prince Kaion jolted, sitting up straight as his eyes opened. He started to speak, but Darius cut him off.

"How long have you been awake?" he asked.

Kaion made a rueful face. "Most of the conversation," he said. "From what you were saying, I think I woke up a few seconds after she did. I thought you'd appreciate at least the illusion of privacy." He turned to Tanitha. "I'm glad you're back with us," he said quietly. "If only because of his likely reaction if you're harmed." He glanced to one side as if thinking back, then said, "You didn't say anything that could be construed as an order, but you did request a promise from him, which is very close. Please don't say anything that I'll need to relay to Naratha. This is bad enough as it is."

"I think you've relayed far more to her already than you should have," Darius said coldly, before Tanitha could respond.

"You know why I did that, and I'm not going to apologize for it," Kaion shot back. "Not to you, anyway. I might owe her an apology for my part in her current predicament, but that's it," he said with a sideways nod to Tanitha. "She's not the cause of this, as far as I can tell."

"No, she isn't," Darius agreed, his voice level and firm. "I want you to help her leave the city."

"No," Tanitha said forcefully. "Absolutely not."

"Tanitha—"

"Where could I go?" she demanded. "And what would happen to you ?"

"Anywhere!" he said, sounding exasperated. " Anywhere would be better than here! And once you're clear, Kai will help me escape, and I'll join you."

Kaion snorted loudly. "That sounds like an excellent plan, if you want to spend what will likely be a very short life together running from your mother's combined forces," he said. "You know what she'll think if you both flee? She'll take it as definite confirmation that Tanitha is controlling you, and that your mind isn't your own." He met Darius' gaze, his own flat and direct. "She's holding back so far because she thinks there's a chance to bring you back from that," he said. "What do you think she's likely to do if she decides that's no longer the case?"

Tanitha's blood chilled. She'd wondered before if Naratha would go so far as to execute her own son if he proved to be a threat to demonkind. She'd tried to dismiss the possibility, but it seemed that she'd just received confirmation, regardless.

Kaion rubbed his temple. "If it were just Naratha, we might have a chance at putting a stop to this," he said. "But it's not. It's gone far beyond that now. Alethia has too much leverage."

"We can stall," Darius said, sitting up suddenly straighter. He turned to Tanitha. "You can say that you're frightened for the child's well-being. That after the last Trial, you want to wait. It'll be an easy case to make, especially if rumors start circulating that you're pregnant." He gave Kai a meaningful look.

"What's the point?" Tanitha asked, frustrated despair creeping into her voice. "How will delaying help anything?"

"It will give me time to get my mother to soften toward you," Darius said quietly. Tanitha gave him an incredulous look. "It's not impossible," he said, though the hint of defensiveness in his voice indicated otherwise. "She'll at the very least be impressed by your strength right now. If I can persuade her that it's more strategic to harness that than to continue to make an enemy out of you…"

"It won't work," Kai said. "I've been trying, Darius. Trying everything I can think of to make this a tiny bit better. Your mother's course is set."

"We don't have anything to lose by trying further, especially after she's seen Tanitha's strength," Darius said firmly. Tanitha looked at him, wanting to believe him that there might be some chance, but unable to make herself do so. Darius met her eyes. There was something in his gaze, some weight or significance that she didn't understand the meaning of. He sat up, pressing his hand against hers. To her surprise, she felt that he'd slipped something hard and rigid between their palms, like a pebble. She almost pulled her hand away to look, but he tightened his grip subtly on her wrist, giving a tiny shake of his head.

"Can you trust me on this?" he asked her, his amber gaze intense. "Can you give me a little more time?"

Realization struck Tanitha with the force of a blow. It wasn't a pebble, it was a chip of rock. Presumably a chip of basalt.

With or without his brother's help, Darius was planning to escape.

Tanitha's mind raced, Kaion's words about what Naratha would do if they fled ringing in her ears. She couldn't let that happen.

Which meant that she couldn't tell him that she refused to try to give him more time to do it.

Hating herself already for the lie, she squeezed his hand tight. "I'll try," she said softly.

Kaion gave a sigh. "I suppose it can't hurt. Though I'm still doubtful it will actually help." He looked at Tanitha. "I'm sorry to do this, but it won't go well for me if Naratha realizes I let you two converse like this," he said. "It's time to go."

Tanitha's heart lurched, the thought of leaving Darius' side filling her with almost indescribable pain. She didn't want to go back out there, where a demon queen was planning her death.

She didn't want to walk away from him.

She brutally shoved down the tears that suddenly seemed determined to overwhelm her. She wouldn't let Darius see how frightened she was, not when it might drive him to dangerous, rash action.

Still, she couldn't quite stop herself from saying, a quaver in her voice, "Do I really need to go now?"

Pain flitted across Darius' gaze. "She'll get suspicious if you stay much longer," he said, his tone heavy with the reluctance of the admission. He tightened his grip on her hand for an instant. "This isn't the end," he said. "I promise. I'm going to keep you safe."

Tanitha started to stand, and he rose with her. When he finally released her hand, the loss of warmth and stability almost drove her to reach out to him once more, just for one more moment of that comfort, but she stopped herself. Instead, she straightened her posture firmly, then turned away.