17. Hellena

17

HELLENA

" H ellena!"

"Aunt Rachelle, I've been wondering when you were going to call. How have you been?"

"Out of cell service range, having a great time reconnecting with Patrick. You've gotten my emails, right?"

"Yeah, if you call those emails. A little more than "I'm okay" would have been nice! Like, who is Patrick, and is he handsome?"

"Oh, shush! I know I've been short, honey. I've just been so busy, and I didn't want to put any more pressure on you than you already have. I hope you've been busy, too? Your last email sounded promising…"

"You're right on the money. I've been ridiculously busy, so much so that I completely forgot to email again after we took care of… you know." It's not that I forgot to email her. It's more like I had no clue how to tell her about anything that's happened. The most I've told her is that I have a new job. "But it's all good, now! We even went by the house, checked on everything. Gavin thinks it's safe for you to come home."

"That's wonderful! I can't wait to hear about your new job when I get back. Your boss sounds like a real menace!"

"Oh, he certainly keeps me on my toes." My toes curl in my shoes thinking about the other night.

"I love you, and I'm so proud of you, Hellena. Keep working hard, and I'll see you in a couple of weeks, okay?"

"Sounds good, have fun. I love you, too."

Hanging up, I get out of the car and head inside the house. Another day of work done.

She'll be back in a week. Thinking of what life will be like when she does…

So much has changed in a little less than a month.

The idea of going home sounds good at first. But it means I have to leave Gavin. "Hey, you home?"

"Yeah. Just got home, myself!" He dashes from the laundry room in his underwear, a towel around his neck, his hair still wet. The sight of the broad-shouldered grown man running through the house has me giggling as I set my things down.

I'll never get tired of seeing him just out of the shower.

"How was your dream job?" He pokes his head out.

"Ha-ha. Very funny. It was… quiet. I may be slowly turning into a glorified secretary." Spending more and more time at my desk. I think Evan is avoiding me.

"Hmm. There are worse jobs, like mine! And you look damn good doing it." Gavin's lightened up a lot in the last few days.

I stick my tongue out at him, flopping down to slip off my heels.

Evan's dress code has rubbed off on me. Not just the incredible outfits he's bought, but in my own choices. Selecting a new wardrobe has eaten into my paycheck a little, but I'm actually enjoying dressing up, looking and feeling pretty.

Ora came with me a couple of times to pick things out early in the week.

She's always pushing me to pick out the most scandalous outfits.

All so I can look good for…

My boss who hasn't shown up to the office since my little dance routine the other night.

Everything I did for him, that he made me do. Thinking of it that way makes it easier to reconcile in my head. Don't get me wrong, I wanted it. He just had to get me seething to make it happen.

Watching him watch me, seeing him gush in his pants to me.

And then he just got up and left .

Not that I wanted anything from him. We aren't there yet. I'm not even sure where ‘there' is or what the hell that all was. All I know is that my dancing did something to him.

It was awesome.

Thrilling.

Confusing.

Which is, I'm sure, why I haven't seen Evan at work. He's been out on jobs, meetings every day. The only excuse I got was a note that this week is "packed". Clearly, not completely made up, seeing as how Geneviv has piled on my workload in the meantime. I doubt I'll ever see the bottom of the stacks of reports on my desk.

The only upside to that is the knowledge I've gained of how our system works. One hard copy, one digital. Kept in undisclosed locations. The idea is to avoid a digital paper trail.

But we keep every bit of dirt, money, and smut we ever dealt out and to whom.

I review the request, the summary of the deal. Check the peripherals, listen to the phone calls, email, any evidence of the meeting, or the favor and delivery, etcetera. Then I create a final summary. Evan approves it.

Then I destroy everything and drop the hard copy and thumb drive in the safe for transport to wherever he sends that stuff for safekeeping.

Which is all fine. Except for the content of some of them.

Several times, I had to get up and leave the room, take a break. The things that people ask for. The things Evan has arranged…

And I'm certain the worst of them never make it to my desk. I know Evan handles some of the reports himself. Quietly.

"Are we still on for movies?" Gavin interrupts the whirlwind of Evan-Sinful-sex-paperwork-repeat pattern that seems to be all I can think about lately.

"Absolutely! I need a night at home. Tell me we have popcorn?"

"Extra butter. And dark chocolate. And ice cream." My eyes get wider with each addition, pretending to faint onto the couch.

"You're my hero!"

"Beer for me, wine for you?"

"Eh… let's go seltzer. Blackberry?" This little domestic rapport we've fallen into is everything . It's the perfect balance to my wacky job.

"What movies are we watching?" Gavin looks a little worried. He probably thinks I only watch Jane Austen and Bridger-lady porn. He's not entirely wrong. I do love me some period dramas, especially the spicy ones.

"Thought we could start with some mindless violence?" I hold up the case for his approval, and he nods, a bit surprised.

"I'll try not to point out what I'd do better…" He grins as I roll my eyes at his bravado.

Even if it isn't really bravado in his case.

Heading into the spare bedroom to change, I leave the door pushed over, some part of me always hoping Gavin will catch a glimpse. I've gotten pretty gutsy lately. Doesn't help that I am so pent up since Evan's ‘show'.

Most of my things are stacked on the dresser, or on boxes, but it works for a changing room and closet, since my bedroom is in the living area.

Hmm. Let's see…

Booty shorts.

Tank top.

Thigh-high, comfy socks.

A little mischievous grin pulls at my lips as I make a little show of walking past the kitchen to the couch. All I hear behind me is a choking sound, a spray of beer, and Gavin coughing.

I stifle my laughter, sliding the movie into the player and getting ready with my blanket. The DVD player whirs, booting the disc, and I can't help but shake my head. Apparently, having internet access and a nice TV does not mean that Gavin Rorshak is ready to get with the times and subscribe to streaming services.

Honestly, it's endearing. And it keeps me from binge-watching garbage on the couch when I'm home. Which is really what I'm starting to feel like this place is.

It's comfortable. Safe. Most importantly, he's here.

Gavin's let me make it mine. Not that I have my own space, exactly. But I don't have that feeling you get when you're staying in someone's guest room for the weekend.

Every day is more natural. Like I belong here.

Even more so since he saved my life.

After the shock of the fight down at the docks, then the fight in the car, I thought things would be awkward. Uncomfortable. Experiencing that fear and danger together broke down a wall between us.

The few times I've seen Gavin this week, he's been pleasant, if a little quiet. He's not really a chatterbox most of the time, anyway, but it's sort of like he's being extra nice to me.

Which could mean any number of things.

I hope it means he's loosened up to me and isn't trying to make nice because he thinks I'm traumatized.

Not that I'm not a little traumatized. I still have nightmares about the blood. The gun. The cracking bones. But then I wake up and think of him sleeping nearby, and the fear goes away.

Being anywhere near him makes me feel good. And it seems like he feels the same way.

Even so, I was still shocked when I asked him earlier in the week if he wanted to have a movie night with me and he said yes!

"You ready?" He grins, flopping down and spilling kernels everywhere. "Whoops!"

Laughing, I scoop up the mess and pop them in my mouth. "Don't waste good snacks!" I hit Play , tucking my legs up under my blanket. He burrows into the cushions beside me, keeping just a tiny bit of room between us.

That doesn't last long.

It just sort of happens. One minute, I'm curled up close to him and the next, his arm is around me and I'm nestled into his chest, watching some stupid Jason Stratham movie.

Go figure. I'm watching corny action flicks with an actual action hero. Mostly because I had no clue what to watch with Gavin.

His scent draws me in, the warmth of his body and firm, muscular side offering just enough cushion to be deliciously comfortable and very provocative. At least for me.

He's let his guard down some, but I can't exactly read him very well.

I think the fact that I've gotten a taste of his world, behind the scenes with his darker half, and I didn't run away has helped a lot. It's not something we've exactly talked about, but it's there.

He doesn't tense up every time I pass him.

Well, not in the way he used to. Things are still tense in a different way ever since we almost kissed, and I could feel how much he wanted me. Before he backed down, shut it down.

I haven't pressed the issue again.

Fortunately, I don't have to say anything.

It's like an unspoken agreement. As long as neither of us says anything, we touch hands as we pass here and there, he rests a hand on my back to let me know he's there. It's a lot like how Evan and I bicker and fight, toying with something no one is willing to admit. Playing tag.

So, halfway through the movie, I double down, draping my legs over his lap.

We're like a couple of horny, lovestruck teenagers. Insert cry-laughing face here.

Oof.

Readjusting my position, I feel him tense up a bit. He's definitely turned on. The vein in his neck tells me his pulse is pounding, just like mine.

The warmth of our bodies works its way into my core.

It makes me want to be bold.

Straddle him. Get his shirt off and…

"Pee break," he mumbles, scooting out from under me.

"Boo!" I tease, tossing the blanket aside. I really want to bust his chops because I know he's just trying to get rid of his erection. Or offer to take care of it for him. I'm not sure how that would go, how he'd take it. At least I can get another seltzer in the meantime. Maybe it will help me cool down.

I'm not mad about it. I get it.

Us getting involved brings up a list of complicated issues. Less than Evan and me, more issues than with Tell.

Doesn't mean it's not frustrating.

I'm diving back onto the couch when my phone rings.

"Think of the devil!" I answer without hesitating. Gavin stops in his doorway, cocking his head as he watches me.

"Heya, Hella. You sound like you're in a good mood." Tell's voice is sweet and smooth, sending tingles down my neck.

"I am!" I make a point of looking at Gav as I say it, smiling. Regardless of our standing, I want him to know how much I enjoy his company, the way things have been lately. "We're watching movies and boozin' it up a bit."

"Oh, yeah? Who's we?" I'm absolutely grateful that he doesn't sound jealous. Tyler doesn't seem the jealous type, except for where Evan's concerned. But I think there's more to their little spat. Maybe they're ex-lovers? Or I need a reality check and a cold shower.

"My roommate and me. It's a double-feature. Action, followed by rom-com." Gavin cocks an eyebrow at the proclamation, and I point at the other movie sitting on the coffee table. He pokes out his lower lip, appraising the back of the box.

"Well, I won't keep you long… I just felt bad about the other day. I was meaning to track you down at the birthday party, but then?—"

"You saw me doing the tango with a US senator?" I almost snort as I say it. Gavin blinks once at the statement. I tell him some of what goes on at work. Not all.

Besides, he's been gone more than usual this week.

"Pretty much! Evan all but threw you over his shoulder to get you out of there after. Must have pissed him off and then some."

"Definitely ‘and then some'." I try to keep my tone from sounding suggestive.

"I'm going to leave that one alone and see if you want to get dinner with me tomorrow night?"

"I would love that. But why don't we make it lunch and the rest of the afternoon? I'm sick of just texting all the time."

"Hey, you've been just as busy as I have."

"Excuses! Pick me up at eleven?" I fumble as soon as I say it, looking up at Gavin to make sure it's okay to give out our address. He just shrugs once, nods. The trust is real …

"Sounds great. Send me your address. I can't wait to see you."

"Two date nights in a row?" Gavin teases, dropping back onto the couch, more than a little huffy. His smirk says he's teasing, but his tone says otherwise.

"Oh-ho! Is that what this is?" I pin him with a stare. "Don't you go all jealous-Alpha on me."

I see the flare in his gaze at my sass. We're face to face, our shoulders just pressed together.

"I'm not. You can date whoever you want." His hand drifts up to my neck, his thumb grazing my cheek, the rim of my ear. "As long as I can have… this."

"You can have…" I hear myself saying without thinking. My hands are pressed to his chest. I feel myself leaning in.

And my knee hits the fucking remote.

"Oh, look, the movie's back on," he mumbles, chuckling.

I join him, flopping back into the crook of his side, letting my laughter take the tension of the moment with it.

One of these days, Gavin…

The rest of the movie plays on, and the next, the two of us giggling at the ridiculous antics of the couple. It might or might not hit way too close to home, way too many times, between the two of us.

Sometime near midnight, I vaguely remember drifting off, still held close in his arms.

I might be dreaming, but I think I feel his lips brush mine, just for a second.