21. Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

Azizia

I wake up before my husband, which is not normal. He doesn’t like sleeping in. He keeps a strict schedule and considers sleeping late time wasted.

Scooting closer to him, I wrap my arm around his torso and snuggle my face against his chest. Xadrian has muscles everywhere. He’s big, firm, and strong. Though he hasn’t showered since yesterday morning, he smells clean. Fresh.

Sucking in a sharp breath, he shifts, stretching and then opens his eyes.

“Good morning,” I say happily, propping my head up on my fists.

He scowls at me, shoving me off him and throwing his legs over the edge of the bed.

“I was hoping we could cuddle before we had to get up,” I say, getting to my knees.

“I don’t have time for cuddling, Azizia.” He scrubs his hands down his face as he gets to his feet.

His morning wood is noticeable in his sleep pants, and it has my mouth watering.

“I can help you with that,” I say, jumping off the bed and moving after him. “You like when I make you come in my mouth.”

He steps into the bathroom, muttering something about a spell and something being annoying.

“Xadrian—”

He grips my arm, cutting off my words, and pushes me out of the bathroom, slamming and locking the door.

I fight back the emotion clogging my throat, not understanding why he’s been so moody lately. Everything has been great. I’ve been so happy since the visit with Prazin, and my husband seemed happy too—at first. But each day that passes, Xadrian’s patience lessens and his temper grows.

I just want him to love me the way I love him. Why is that too much to ask?

Sighing, I head to the walk-in closet to pick out my outfit for the day. His favorite color is red, so I find a dress in that color and put it on, hoping it’ll brighten his mood or make him want to fuck me. When I’m done, I work on my hair in the mirror, braiding it the way he likes. He’s taking a long time in the bathroom, longer than usual, so I knock on the door.

“Are you okay?”

“Can you just leave me the fuck alone!” he shouts.

I jerk away from the door, a heaviness settling in my chest.

I need to brush my teeth and wash my face.

Needing to make myself busy before I cry—he hates when I cry—I work on making the bed, even though that’s the servant’s job. I do it because it makes Xadrian happy. He likes when I do wifely duties like clean. He hates when I cook though, says I’m awful at it, so I don’t do that ever.

When Xadrian comes out of the bathroom, his lips are set in a firm line and his brow is furrowed.

He’s angry. He just woke up. I can’t understand how he’s mad this early in the morning.

I want to ask if there is anything I can do to make it better, but it’s best I leave him alone. Maybe he just needs some space.

While he gets dressed, I go into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I wash my face and put on makeup. Xadrian says I’m too pale and need some color on my face. He thinks I look better with makeup, so I’ve been using it. I’m not great at it, but if it’s what he wants, I’ll do it. Anything to make him happy.

“You have five minutes to finish getting ready. I have a meeting,” he barks as he storms out of the room.

I didn’t realize he had a meeting this morning. If I had, I would have woken him up earlier, but he never tells me these things. How does he expect me to help him if he won’t tell me things?

I finish up in the bathroom, then hurry out of the room and down the hall to the dining room. He isn't there, so I go to his office next. He expects us to have every meal together, so I need to find him for breakfast. The door is slightly open and I hear him speaking to someone angrily when I stop beside it.

“I don’t understand why this is happening. Why is she so goddamn clingy? I just wanted her to behave, not be up my ass twenty-four-seven. I can’t even breathe for fuck’s sake.”

“She’s just doing what she thinks you want. That’s how the spell works. It pulls out certain emotions. Heightens them. She’ll need some training.”

“I don’t have time to train her! I just want a wife who will do as she is told. Keep her mouth shut, unless it’s to suck my dick. Which, quite frankly, I don’t even want her to do anymore.”

“Perhaps you should go back to your old ways, then.”

“Looks like I’ll have to. Being nice didn’t fucking work, but the last thing I want is a used up loose pussy. It’s bad enough she was fucking around with that sickly-looking blood sucker up top.”

Up top? I’ve never been topside. I’ve only ever been here. But he said wife, which is me. Who could he be talking about then? None of this makes sense.

I blink a few times, my mind feeling fuzzy. I walk away from the office and go back to the dining room to wait for him. Whatever he’s dealing with must be stressing him out. I’ll have to come up with a way to help him with that. Some way that won’t make it worse, but instead better. He’s my husband, I love him, and it’s my responsibility to make him happy.

It’s been another week and my husband is still angry. I wish I knew why. If I did, I could fi it. I’m here, loving him, willing to do anything for him, and he can’t even stand to look at me. He’s threatened to send me to the dungeons, but he wouldn’t actually do that, would he?

I just wish he would talk to me—

Heavy footsteps sound in the hall, so I jump up from my chair and go out there. Xadrian is walking by just as I step through the door.

“Hey,” I say with a smile.

“I don’t have time for you, Azizia,” he growls.

I hurry after him.

“But I was hoping we could talk.”

He stops, whirls on me, and then his hand is on my throat. He slams me against the wall, my head hitting so hard I see stars. I cry out, my hands going to his arm to pull him off me. He’s squeezing my throat so tight I think he may crush it.

“Hiring Prazin to fix you was the worst mistake I have ever made. If you don’t back the fuck off and give me some space, I will give you to Selvor and allow him to do what he pleases with you, including giving you to his men.”

My eyes widen and I open my mouth to beg him not to do that, to ask why he would do that. Why would he want his wife to be with other men? That’s terrible! I’ve only ever been with Xadrian. I could never do such a thing. Meaning they would… they’d force me! The thought has tears coming to my eyes.

With a growl, he shoves off me and storms away. I slink to the floor and cry quietly, hugging myself.

I cry until my tears run dry. Then I sit there until I muster up the energy to get to my feet.

Obviously my husband is having a really bad day today. I should leave him alone, and try again tomorrow.

Sniffing, I head down the hall and down the grand staircase that leads to the front of the mansion to make my way to the library. Reading usually helps my mood. Getting lost in a book, in another world, makes life good for just a little while.

I’ve just reached the bottom landing when there’s a loud bang on the front door. Then another, and another.

The door bursts open and in runs a man who, for some reason, looks familiar.

“Azizia! Azizia, thank fuck. I’m here, baby. I’m…” The man grunts as he runs into the foyer, but slows as he looks around. He takes in our surroundings before his eyes settle on me again. Mine widen. This man looks… ill. But he’s so familiar. Yet, I don’t think I know him. His brow furrows as he comes toward me, hesitantly reaching out to grab my shoulders.

“Is that really you?” Then he mutters under his breath as he looks around again. “Was it really this easy?”

Something clicks when his hand touches my shoulder. I blink a few times, and it’s like I’m seeing him in a new light. I still don’t know why I feel like I know him, but it’s worse now. And on top of that, I have this sudden urge to take him somewhere. It’s like directions were just forced into my head by… something .

“Felix…” The name leaves my mouth, and I assume it’s his, but I don’t know how I know that.

“Are you okay? Where is everyone? Did that son of a bitch hurt you?” He runs his hands up and down my arms, glancing all around. “I’ll kill him, I swear.”

“No,” I hiss, grabbing his arm and pulling him toward the front door. The urgency to leave is at an all-time high. “We have to go. We have to hide if we want to escape.”

”Hide? What are you talking about? Zia, we have to go. I need to get you out of here safely before I come back and murder that bastard.”

I look around, noting there isn’t a single guard around, which is odd. They’re always here. But I’ll take it because there is a deep urge to take this Felix man and run. So that’s what I do. It’s a compulsion that I can’t push away. I have to do this.

“Zia,” he hisses. “This isn’t the way I came. I don’t know if this way is safe. We need to go that way, Silas and—”

“Just hurry up,” I say, tugging his hand. “Trust me. We have to hurry.”

He blinks at me a few times, then nods. Relief floods me. I let instinct guide me as we go, unsure where my end destination is, only knowing in my gut which way to go.

We run down the desert-like roads, sweat dripping down between my breasts and across my head.

“It’s not much further,” I pant. “Then we will be safe.”

There’s a thick patch of dark trees ahead—that’s it. That’s the place. I pull on his hand and run that way, moving faster. Felix follows willingly. When we get deep enough that I feel safe, I turn to him and hug him.

“I missed you.” The words fall out of my mouth. I don’t feel like they’re mine, but they seem right. Like somewhere deep down, I do miss him. Blinking a few times, I look him over. Though he looks sick, he isn’t ugly. He’s got a nerdy thing going for him that I don’t hate. He’s nothing like my husband, yet… I shake the thoughts from my head, confused over what I’m feeling. Everything is foggy again, like I’m dreaming. But I’m pretty sure this is real.

He’s panting, but cups my cheeks in his hands and leans in to kiss me. I pull away and find him frowning, a look of confusion on his face but I smile and he smiles back.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asks.

“Yes, I’m okay.”

He looks around. “Where are we? Why did we have to come here? Shouldn’t we leave?

“It’s just where we are supposed to be,” I tell him with a shrug.

Again, I don’t know how I know that. I just do… but the more I think about it, the stranger it seems. It almost feels like I wasn’t in control of my body. That maybe I’m still not…

And when I hear quiet footsteps behind me, something that should have my spine tingling yet I feel as calm as ever, I really know something isn’t right. But I can’t put my finger on what it is. Then someone is speaking, and my stomach knots up… but I can’t figure out why.

“Hello, darling. I’m so glad you’ve come back to me.”