Chapter Twenty-Four No Way to Win

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

NO WAY TO WIN

“Who leaked the footage?” Qin Zheng slaps the glass wall of his quarantine chamber. The sterile lights overhead cast long shadows under the sharp angles of his face. His scrutiny slashes between me, Yizhi, and Sima Yi.

Yizhi bows, shoulders quivering with tension. “The Gewei Bu will thoroughly investigate the production crew, Your Majesty.”

“How do I know you were not the culprit?”

A spasm of panic for Yizhi races through me.

“Oh, please, he’s the last person who’d leak the footage,” I say with feigned calm. “It’s my blood the reactionaries are calling for. Why would he give them more ammo to push for my execution?”

Qin Zheng paces behind the glass like a prowling predator. After an agonizing silence, he says, “Tell the crew if they do not identify the culprit among themselves, all of their heads will be lopped off and displayed on pikes. And draft an edict for the Ministry of Justice.” He snaps his fingers at Yizhi. “From now on, every five neighboring households shall be organized into a collective unit responsible for monitoring each other for counter-revolutionary activities. Those who fail to report the crimes of others in their unit shall be punished along with the culprits. Inversely, those who submit reports with sufficient proof shall be handsomely rewarded.”

“Understood, Your Majesty.” Yizhi writes with lightning speed on his tablet.

My mouth goes dry. Huaxia has always had extended punishment policies for severe crimes—my family would’ve been executed with me if I’d murdered Yang Guang in a non-battle circumstance—but this is a new level of intensity. Is this what we have to resort to? The reactionaries’ reach is indeed extending further and faster than we expected, and now they have an old order Sage on their side. How can we root them out without using drastic measures?

“How does Your Majesty wish to respond to public concern over the footage?” Sima Yi clasps his hands in deference. “Should we dismiss it as a fake?”

“Would that be believed?”

Yizhi looks up from his tablet. “We could film a recreation of the moment, but with the crowning going right. As long as Her Highness gets fully sanitized and goes in and out of Your Majesty’s chamber as quickly as possible, the risk of infection is low. It should be enough to convince most people.”

“Most, but not all,” Qin Zheng mumbles, looking lost in thought.

“Which is why Her Highness should quit being stubborn and just bear a child for Your Majesty.” Sima Yi glares at me from the corners of his eyes. “No amount of posturing on the battlefield will quell public opinion as effectively as becoming a mother.”

I choke on my next breath. “How about you worry about your own position first? The reactionaries are calling you out, too! Now that there’s a surviving Sage, you have no right to be Chairman anymore!”

“And? Do you think I’m in this for power?” Sima Yi says with a whip of his sleeve. “I only want what’s good for Huaxia! I’d gladly yield my position to Sage Kong, so long as he turned in the counter-revolutionary leaders. In fact, I’ll make a public broadcast stating this! I have no qualms about sacrifice, unlike Your Highness .”

“Why are you so obsessed with getting me pregnant?” I practically scream at him, though I know it’s the gods who are really trying to bring this about.

“Obsessed? I’m being logical! You’re the one obsessed with your irrational fears about something your body was made to do, despite it being the easiest defense for your life and position! Some of us wish we could sit around with a baby in the belly and let everyone else do the work, but we can’t!”

“What reality do you live in that mothers get to sit around and do nothing ? They only get empty praise for how hard they suffer! Watch how quickly people turn on them when they’re anything less than perfect and selfless. And what happens after I give birth? If it’s a girl instead of a boy? Will you all drown her with your whining and then force me to try again?”

I think of the age difference between me and my little brother, not even eleven months. A conception before my mother healed from the way I tore her up as I came into existence. My father used to tell me over and over about how other families who shared the “misfortune” of having two daughters in a row would drown the second in a bucket to scare off further female spirits, and how I should call myself lucky that he and my grandparents decided against doing the same.

I wonder if, when their lives flashed behind their eyes as I stared them down in the Yellow Dragon, they regretted that decision more than ever.

“Enough!” Qin Zheng presses his hands to the glass as if he might break it. “Chairman Sima, you will speak to my empress with respect.”

Sima Yi bows, a vein throbbing on his forehead. “My apologies, Your Majesty.”

“However, it is indeed time to stop being stubborn.” Qin Zheng’s attention slides over to me.

My skin prickles. A memory intrudes to the front of my mind, of the so-called maidenhood examination I went through when I was first brought to the Great Wall. Of shivering with my legs propped up as an auntie opened me with a cold steel tool and shone a flashlight inside me.

That’ll be my fate again as doctors inseminate me.

“What if I faked it?” I blurt.

“Faked it?” Qin Zheng echoes incredulously.

“Your Majesty said your concubines always miscarried, right? So why even put me through that? Let’s just announce that I’m pregnant so the reactionaries will shut up about me. Then after we root out Zhuge Liang and Kong Zhuxi, we can say I also suffered a tragic miscarriage.”

I must admit, some part of me wishes I could be exactly what the reactionaries see me as: a wicked villainess with an emperor as a puppet, doing none of what a woman is supposed to do. Even faking motherhood feels like a concession, an admission that there is no way to win without conforming. But it’s a concession preferable to becoming a mother for real. The reactionaries’ primary weapon in the war over public opinion has been to blame everything they don’t like about what’s happening on me. I can’t let my pride get in the way of raising the most effective shield I could summon.

Sima Yi smacks his lips. “When we have modern medicine, there’s far less chance of you misca—”

“If you put a baby in me for real, I can guarantee it won’t make it to term,” I snap, both to him and to the gods, who are surely listening. “A real pregnancy would affect my ability to pilot, to generate tribute .” I look to Qin Zheng. “Your Majesty wouldn’t want me as the mother to your children. Trust me.”

Qin Zheng makes a face like he’s tasted something very strange, but then he flashes an even stranger smile. “What do you think of that, Secretary Zhang?”

“I think it’s indeed more productive for Her Highness to battle at full capacity than to attempt actual pregnancy at her young age,” Yizhi says, with a trace of bitterness I hope only I can hear. “A facade would be enough. Even the hardest of hearts can’t stay unmoved by the patriotism of a warrior mother. However, we should still wait a few more weeks before making the announcement. It will backfire if the reactionaries have any parentage doubt to latch on to.”

Qin Zheng’s smile fades. I almost yell at Yizhi. He needs to stop bringing that up!

“Very well,” Qin Zheng says. “Let’s announce it after my empress’ next battle.”

I put my hand to my belly, breathing deeply, harshly.

I’m already telling so many lies to the masses. What’s another to gain their love and support?