Chapter 8

Shock held me hostage. This wasn't how I wanted to see Alek for the first time since I'd run. Of course Sunday had told him I was here, and if it hadn't been her, Kingston wouldn't have been able to keep his mouth shut. The second my twin's mate had set foot on Blackwood's grounds, this confrontation had been inevitable. Still, part of me hoped to avoid it.

"Alek..."

"Hello, brother." His smirk was devoid of all sincerity. "I'd ask if you'd missed me, but since you went to such lengths to avoid me, I'm guessing not."

"You can't be here," I snarled, desperate to keep the truth from him. If he knew I'd taken on this curse to protect him, he'd never forgive himself.

"The hell I can't. You abandoned us all! You're lucky I didn't contact Father and tell him you were missing when you left. He would've rained fire across the land to find you."

I rolled my eyes, knowing that was the least my father would have done. Still, I played dumb. "Missing? That's a bit dramatic."

"Is it? What else do you call taking off in the middle of the night and cutting off all contact?"

"Vacation?" I drawled, aiming for bored, although I was sure my racing pulse was going to give me away. A Berserker on edge was a Berserker two seconds from losing control.

"A vacation? You call this a vacation? What has happened to you? Sunday said you were changed, but I certainly didn't expect to see you looking like this. You're barely recognizable. A beast."

"Your mate should've kept her mouth shut. This doesn't concern her."

A growl tore from my twin's throat as his muscles swelled.

Kai stepped forward, but I stopped him with a hand on his chest. "Leave it, dragon. My brother won't harm me."

He gave Alek a dubious once-over. "Are ye sure?"

I nodded. "You can go. I don't need a babysitter."

"Perhaps not, but I think I'll stay all the same."

"This is a family matter, dragon," Alek snarled, his eyes flickering like bolts of lightning.

"And Tor is my family."

Alek laughed, low and angry. "Is this why you ran off, then? You replaced me?"

"I don't need to justify my reasons with you, brother. You live your life the way you want. I'll live mine."

"We've always done so together." Alek sounded hurt, but still simmering with fury.

"Have we? I remember a time not so long ago when you stole my destiny from me. You abandoned me in Novasgard so you could fuck your little mate and forget about the rest of us."

When Kai winced, I knew my blow might have been aimed a little too low. But if that was what was needed to get my twin away from here and preserve his ignorance, then it had to be done. I'd already committed myself to this path when I accepted the curse in his place. I would see it through to the bitter, bloody end.

I had to convince Alek to leave this place without me because unless Moira figured out a way to free us from the spell trapping us here, he wouldn't get me back. Ever. And the second he found that out, there wasn't a force on Earth that would prevent the war Novasgard would bring to this realm. I couldn't bear the weight of the deaths that would follow.

"Get out of here, Alek. I didn't invite you. I don't want you here."

"No," he said mulishly. The stubborn arse. I should have known better. My Loki-blessed brother never did what was asked of him.

Reaching for the nearest object, I tore a young fir from the ground and hurled it at him. "I said go!"

He caught it and tossed it aside, his eyes flashing and body growing as his Berserker took shape.

"You think I'm afraid of you?" I laughed with a sneer, allowing my rage to swell and my body to transform. "You aren't the only one touched by bloodlust, brother."

Alek's eyes widened as my fingers turned to claws and the scales rippled their way across my body. For the first time, maybe ever, staring at my twin was no longer like gazing into a mirror. We could not look more different. The knowledge hurt more than I thought it would, considering I once wished for some space from him. Now it felt as though there was an entire galaxy, and it was nearly unbearable.

"How did this happen?" Alek snarled in disgust.

My chest ached, but I wasn't going to share the details with him. All that would do was make him more resolved to fix me. I wasn't broken, Dahlia saw to that, and I didn't want to go back to the prince I'd once been.

"Destiny, brother."

Alek shook his head. "No. This was never your destiny."

"And yet here I am."

"Just come home with me, brother. Together we'll find a way to fix you."

"I am not broken!" I bellowed, the beast within taking full control and lashing out. "This is the destiny you put in my path when you stole my time at Ravenscroft. There is no going back. Now leave before I send you back with a scar to remember me by. I'm sure Sunday will still love you, even if your pretty face is mangled by my claws."

"Even scarred, I would still be the prettier twin."

I knew he hadn't intended for it to be a dig at my new devilish form. He'd made comments like that for as long as I could remember. That didn't mean it didn't cut deep due to my own newly discovered insecurities.

"Care to test the theory?" I asked, voice low and dripping with violence.

"Tor," Kai warned.

He could have been a fly for all the attention I paid him as I stalked toward my brother.

"It's why I found my mate, and you've chosen to be... this," Alek taunted.

My lip curled in a sneer. He must not have known about Dahlia, but there was something in me that wanted to keep her to myself.

"You're right, brother. It would take a special kind of mate to want either of us looking like this. Sunday certainly wouldn't."

That did it. Alek raged, shoving me hard as he growled, "Say that again to my face."

Words were impossible to form as the red haze of my fury engulfed me. My brother and I had fought before. It was basically a birthright, given our upbringing. We had boyish tussles, warriors' sparring sessions, and even a few hot-headed fistfights. This wasn't the same. Never before had we come up against each other while controlled by the white-hot rage of our Berserker blood.

I lunged at him, slashing my claws in the air less than an inch away from his chest, a warning he was lucky to get. But Alek had less practice than I when it came to managing his rage. I'd bet he could count on both hands the number of times he'd let the rage consume him. Which meant he was less controlled, less cognizant of what he was doing. He was all fuming instinct while I was able to draw on years of training and strategy.

He didn't stand a chance.

Kai shouted our names, but it was easy to dismiss him as Alek barreled into me, taking us both to the ground. We grappled, rolling around in the dirt and broken twigs and leaves. It was a constant battle for dominance, the same violent dance we'd been engaged in since we were old enough to care about such things. Only this time, we weren't play-fighting.

My claws dug into his shoulders as he pummeled my abdomen, and we rolled until the two of us slammed into a giant tree trunk, shaking the thing so fiercely branches fell to the ground.

"Take it back!" Alek snarled.

"No!" I shouted, headbutting him to knock him off me. It was a move I'd long ago perfected, and the addition of my horns only made it deadlier. Sadly, not even the sight of my twin's blood dripping into his eyes was enough to cool my wrath.

"Never speak of my K?rasta."

Sucking in deep lungfuls of air as I got to my feet, I went in for the kill, leaving behind all of my reservations about telling him the truth. "She'd run from you if you weren't so pretty, brother. You and I both know it. Now go home. To your happy life with your beautiful child, and remember what I did for you."

"What you did for me?" he asked, breathing hard as he stood and spat out a mouthful of blood.

"Tor..." Kai tried again.

"You want answers, brother? What if you can't handle the truth?"

"There's nothing you can say to me that I can't accept."

I laughed, a deep booming sound that sent the remaining birds fleeing. "You have always been a short-sighted fool. It's your trickster nature."

Alek scoffed, using the back of his arm to wipe the blood from his brow. "Say your piece so we can finish this."

"I will never return home, Alek. Not to your life, not to Novasgard."

"Do you really hate me that much?" he asked, pain lancing his features.

My truth was a roar as it all finally came pouring out of me. "No, you damned idiot. I did what I had to because I love you. I'd protect you from every evil to see you happy. Even knowing the cost, I'd do it all over again."

"Do what?"

"Take on the curse meant for you."

He faltered, his eyes returning to their normal shade as he stared at me and let my words sink in. "What curse are you speaking of?"

"The one the Shadow Court demanded for the slaughter of their warriors."

"The Shadow Court..." he trailed off, his skin leaching of color. "The night you left, when there was that freak storm."

"That was no storm. He thought I was you, and I allowed it. You had already done so much, fought through impossible odds, had Eden and your forever in your grasp. I couldn't let them take it from you."

Alek mutely shook his head, horror and pain flickering in his eyes. "No. No, Tor. That wasn't your choice to make."

"It is done."

Alek shoved me again, though this time, it was the move of a desperate man rather than an angry one. "No. We'll fix it. We'll go to the Shadow Court and explain. Have them reverse it. If it's payment they demand, then it's mine to pay. Not yours."

"It's not that easy," Kai said, his whisper doing what his shouting had not.

"What?" Alek snapped.

Familiar enough with my rage, Kai didn't so much as flinch at Alek's. "We've already spoken to them. They know, and there is no cure," he explained, pity in every word.

"Then you haven't been persuasive enough," Alek snarled, his eyes darkening again. "I'll speak to Father. No one will dare say no to the Jarl of Novasgard."

"Alek," I said, shaking my head. "It's too late. What's done is done. This is my path. I made my choice, and now I must live with it."

"It wasn't your choice to make!"

"It doesn't matter. It is done."

"Tor," he whispered, voice cracking.

"You should go," I forced out, my twin's pain hurting me far more than any physical blow. "Leave me."

"I won't. You're my twin. I won't ever leave you. We came into this life together and we shall leave the same way."

I let my bitterness and anger fuel my next words as the rage built inside me again. "There's nothing for you here. You have your wife, your daughter, waiting for you at home. Go. Go back to the life you fought so hard for and live every moment like it's your last."

Alek's jaw clenched and he shook his head. I could already see the protest building in his throat. Realization struck me like one of my father's lightning bolts. Alek would never leave. Not willingly. Not unless I played upon the guilt eating him up inside. I knew it as surely as I knew my name. Because that is the only way he'd get me to walk away were our roles reversed.

"Don't you get it? I don't want you here."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes, brother. I do. You are a constant reminder of everything I have lost. Everything you've taken from me since the moment you were born. You are living the life that was meant for me, wearing my face, making our family proud. The battles you fought, the glory you found, your mate... All of it should have been mine. You stole that from me the day you took my place at Ravenscroft."

A tear trickled from the corner of my twin's eye, and that was when I delivered my killing blow.

"I never want to see you again. Be gone when I get back, or I'll remove you myself."

My gaze met Kai's as I spun around. He knew my words for the lie they were. My love and contentment with Dahlia were proof enough of that. I would never trade a second of my time with her for anything. Not even the life I once chased with the single-minded devotion of a fanatic.

"Go," he mouthed, knowing that I would not last another second without caving.

I took off running, trusting Kai to pick up the pieces of Alek's broken heart.

A torrent of emotions swirled in me, too much to bear at the same time. I gave myself over to my beast, letting the urge to forget everything else win out as I headed deeper into the woods toward the town beyond. I couldn't allow guilt to consume me because if I did, I'd return to Alek. He had to leave. And for him to do that, he had to think I hated him.

He had to let me go. We might be twins, but his life no longer belonged to me. It belonged to his mate and that sweet little girl. They needed him. And maybe I did too, but I could learn to live without him.

I had to.

Alek had paid the price for his happily ever after.

It was time for me to pay mine.