Chapter 11

Gideon

I take Ivy and Lilly to The Grotto Bar and Grill to get their mind off of everything that's happened recently. They need to relax – to take their minds off the feeling of being imbalanced and lost in the midst of fleeing from abuse. They're good now. They're safe and secure. I provided that for them temporarily, but now, it's time to let them go.

Do I want to let go? No, I don't, but Ivy had a life outside of me for two years. I'm not the man she wants, so there's that. Whatever the case, I'm glad I was there to protect. And whatever happens between me and Ivy, I will always be there for Lilly.

My phone rings, I answer, "What's up, Brandon?"

"Have you lost your freakin' mind?" Brandon asks, yelling into my ear like he wants to get hung up on. That's exactly what I do – hang up the phone.

He calls right back. I get up from the table while Ivy and Lilly eats and step outside near the outdoor stages.

I answer, "Shut up and listen, Brandon. If this is about Gage, he had it coming. I'm tired of tiptoeing around him because he's the youngest. Who cares? He's a grown man and he's done enough to screw up my life. This is where it ends. You and mom deal with him. I'm wiping my hands clean."

He doesn't respond for a moment as if taking it all in, then asks, "What did he do to deserve a broken nose?"

"He told his friend, Cash—the man who Ivy was seeing while I was locked up, by the way…the same one who gave her that black eye—where Ivy was staying and this fool tried to break into my houseand harm Ivy and Lilly. Not on my watch! I ain't no saint, but one thing I will do is protect my family, even if it's from my family."

"Dang. I didn't know all of that."

"Yeah, well now you do. I have to get back to my daughter."

"Okay, man. I'll catch you later."

After sliding my phone into my shirt pocket, I walk back into the bar and see Lilly laughing and making a funny face at her mother. When she spots me, she says, "Dad-dee!"

"Hey, babygirl. Told you I'd be right back."

I glance over at Ivy to see her smiling. She says, "This is nice."

"What is?"

"Us together like this." She inhales deeply, releases it slowly then says, "I feel like I can finally breathe."

"You can, Ivy. I will never let anything happen to you, or Lilly."

She offers a small smile and refocuses her attention on Lilly. I focus my attention on her.

She shies away from my gaze.

It's funny how life is. This woman used to be my world. In some ways, she still is, but we're worlds apart, even after I found myself between her legs, stuffed in her tight, little box that has always drove me wild. Still does.

All those days I was locked up, it was memories of her that got me through. She ran back into my arms when her life was in danger, but now that the threat is gone, she really doesn't need me any longer.

"Gideon?"

I glance up at her. "Yes?"

"Lilly was handing you a fry."

"Oh, I'm sorry, princess. My mind was in a million places at once."

I take a sip of straight rum and ask myself what I'm doing here. The dynamic between us is confusing – yet, I have a potent desire to taste her.

"So, I guess I'll take you back to your place," I say just to see if she'll offer a rebuttal. To see if she'll express any interest in being with me.

She says, "Yeah. I have all of my things packed."

She has all of her things packed…

"We also need to work out some kind of visitation for Lilly. I wasn't that good at being a husband, but I want to try harder to be a father. I want Lilly to know me."

"Dad-dee."

I grin. "Yes, princess?"

Lilly hands me another fry. This time I take it and toss it in my mouth. She giggles.

"Um—yeah," Ivy says. "We'll work something out for sure."

"Why did you say it like that?"

"Like what?'

"Like you're not sure?"

"I am sure. I want you to be a part of her life, Gideon?"

"Are you sure you're sure because you certainly didn't want me to be a part of yours."

"Gideon, I—"

"How horrible must I have been for you to do what you did to me?"

She looks to the left and right, judging our distance from people and says discreetly, "Gideon, I don't want to do this here?"

I bang the table with open hands and ask, "Then when are we going to do it?"

Lilly's face balls up like she's about to cry. I didn't mean to upset her, but the pain I feel is still very much present. Sex with Ivy didn't fix it. Living with her for almost a month didn't fix it. I don't know what will.

I stand up, toss a fifty on the table, and say, "Catch an Uber home. I'll bring your bags in here so you'll have everything."

"Gideon, wait—"

"For what? You don't need me anymore."

And with that, I leave her there. I don't know why I thought we were going to have some quality family time. She made it clear how she felt about me, and I'd be a fool to overlook that.