Chapter 34

chapter 34

brYCE

She’s going to choose her brother over me. Over me and Jolie. I’ve given out at least two hundred meals, smiled, and taken photographs with fans, but my stomach bubbles with anxiety.

I haven’t felt these types of nerves since the accident.

Accident?

It’s the first time I’ve thought about it like an accident. Emmaline convinced me that it wasn’t my fault. She has a way of hearing me and finding the sunlight that streaks through the trees, instead of the shadows the trees create. I’ve lived in the shadows since I was a teenager. Not wanting to be better than my brother Andri. Tried not to bring attention to myself. I didn’t want to hear about my past, so I stayed silent.

No talking of parents.

Of brothers.

Of car crashes .

I stayed quiet and thought the pain would eventually fade, but it didn’t. It took a one-night stand coming back into my life for me to see that sometimes, good things happen to bad people and then to accept that I’m not a bad person, a bad thing happened. We weren’t drinking. My brother asked me to drive.

I look up to the cathedral ceiling in my living room and then to the tree we were going to decorate last night after the game.

Never happened.

She didn’t come.

She had the weekend off to spend with her family. Belinda, the owner’s daughter, kept Jolie at the game. Since I didn’t play, Roman and I had zero interaction. He won’t look at me, and I have no idea what to say since his sister seems to have chosen him over me.

Do I blame her? Would I choose my brother too?

Through the suffocating air, I ask my brother, “Can you help me? Help me be happy. I know I don’t deserve it but…”

Jolie runs into the room, holding her blue teddy bear by her fingers instead of clenching it tight to her body. I smile inside but can’t force one that shows. She’s making progress. As if she can feel my broken heart, she curls into my arms.

Sometimes you don’t need to talk. Sometimes you just need to feel.

Whether it’s happiness or sadness, feeling it is part of the process. That’s what Emmaline and Jolie have taught me.

Jolie understands that Emmaline isn’t here, and something isn’t quite right in the universe. She lifts her chin with tears in her eyes.

“Daddy?”

I love hearing her voice but hate the sadness laced through it.

“Is Emmaline coming back?”

She messaged me Thanksgiving night saying we need to lay low. She can’t end her brother’s career. Does that mean eventually we’ll be together?

“I don’t know, sweetheart. But no matter what, we’ll always be together.”

We deserve someone who will fight for us. A person who wants us more than anyone else.

The buzzer goes off, so I get up and push the button. “Mr. Wynward, there’s a woman here to see you.”

“Send her up,” I say excitedly and push the button. I grab Jolie into my arms and go out to the door to wait for Emmaline. I don’t know whether it’s a good or bad sign that she didn’t use her key card. Shit, it’s probably bad. She’s going to give it back and tell us goodbye. I squeeze Jolie tighter.

The elevator doors open and in an instant, I know it’s not her.

Francesca rushes forward, throwing her arms around us, sobbing. My free arm wraps around her back. Jolie looks at me but doesn’t hug her mom.

Closing my eyes for a moment, I wish it were Emmaline instead of Francesca. A rattle makes me open my eyes and when I do, Emmaline is standing rigid and frozen, watching another woman and the mother of my child crying in my arms .

“Emmaline,” I stammer. My heart pounds with a rush of emotions.

Jolie glances at her and yells her name. Francesca loosens her grip, and my arm falls from her back, but Emmaline turns and presses the button.

In four strides, my hand is on her arm. “Don’t go.”

“I have to. I can’t go through this again.” The door opens. She shoves herself into the corner, and the door closes. I let her go.

When I turn, Francesca’s tears have dried up, and a smirk covers her face.

Reluctantly, I invite Francesca inside to spend time with her daughter. While Jolie goes to the bathroom, I ask, “What’s going on?”

“Lukas asked for a divorce. His parents hate me and say I don’t have a motherly bone in my body.”

They’re not wrong.

“He could only get his fortune if we were married. Since they thought he had an heir, I was approved. They found out that Jolie wasn’t his when his cousin needed an organ and it unraveled. I had my tubes tied after Jolie, so they wanted me out of his life. He convinced them to let me spend time with them, and they weren’t impressed.”

I don’t know what to say. “I’m sorry, but you should have told me about Jolie when she was born.

“We could be a family,” Francesca suggests. Her voice is cool, lacking the emotion when people want to be a family. ”I could move in.”

Jolie runs back into the room, shouting, “No. Emmaline’s going to live here. Right, Daddy? ”

Jolie’s outbursts tonight make me think to ask Emmaline if it’s a stress response. Like she thinks she’ll have to move again and with people she doesn’t know.

I shake my head as I pick her up. “Jolie, give your mom a hug. And Francesca, that’s never going to happen. If you’re staying in town, then we can set up a schedule for you to see Jolie.”

She scoffs, “She’s my daughter.”

“She’s our daughter, and I have full custody,” I remind her. “It would be best if you just leave.”

With a pop of her hip and roll of her eyes, she reaches out and hugs Jolie while still in my arms. I feel Jolie tense and pull back.

“I’ll be back for you.”

Jolie’s little hands latch onto my neck. I set Jolie down and walk her mother to the elevator, making it clear that I’ll fight for sole custody, but she can have visiting rights. Someone who drops her child off with a stranger, then sneaks out, doesn’t need to be the full-time caretaker of a child.

When I walk back, Jolie slaps the couch twice for me to sit down. She points at the tree on the patio, Emmaline’s hypo-allergenic tree. Which gives me an idea.

“What if we take Emmaline’s tree to her house? If she’s there, you can help her decorate it.”

In her excitement, she pushes me over as she kisses my cheek. There’s nothing like unconditional love, and I promise myself, no matter what Jolie does in her life, I’ll love her.

Me: Jolie and I are coming by. There’s something she wants you to have.

Emmaline: Roman and my parents are here.

Me: I’ll stay in the car but please don’t blame Jolie for whatever has or hasn’t happened with us.

Because I’m not blaming myself anymore. Emmaline and I entered this relationship with our eyes wide open. I knew if she didn’t choose me, it would cut me. She knew if she did, it would hurt her brother’s career.

Yet here we are. She didn’t choose me, and she still hurt her brother.

Emmaline: Okay. I’m sorry. One day, Roman will get it.

Me: I don’t want to come second to another man. This is where we are, huh?

Emmaline: I’ll make him understand.

Me: When? How long? Before Jolie’s birthday? When she’s nine? When I’ve retired? Never mind. Be there in twenty minutes.

I pull up with the tree in my truck, unbuckle Jolie from her booster seat, then tug the trunk until I’ve pulled it onto her front stoop. Emmaline opens the door, glancing at me but wrapping Jolie in a hug .

“What did you bring me?”

“It’s your tree. Daddy said you would let me help decorate it.” She holds up the handmade paper decorations.

“Sure. I would love that. Come in.”

Jolie glances over her shoulder at me and waves, but when Emmaline looks at me, my heart breaks a little more. Somehow, I’m going to be around Emmaline every day, knowing she’ll never be mine.