Chapter 39

Harry had Rory hot and bothered all evening. Every time she looked at him, she thought about how good it had been the one time they’d had sex. Working with the therapist, she’d started to separate what had happened at the compound from what had happened in her life before.

Dinner was nice. Watching Ava and Wild work together with the girls and in the kitchen made her heart squeeze. She’d always thought men weren’t into doing family things. She’d never really seen it in action, but Wild did so much. When it was time for the girls to wash up before bed, Wild said it was his turn and headed upstairs with Emma and Lila. She heard the girls laughing while they were saying goodbye to Ava.

She relaxed into Ava’s hug, thankful she had good friends willing to help her recover. She couldn’t imagine what her life would be like if she had left California.

“Call if you need anything,” Ava said before she let go.

“Thank you. You all have been so good to me.”

Ava reached out and squeezed her hand. “This is what friends do. ”

“Thank you,” Harry said as he leaned in and hugged Ava.

“I’ll see you all this weekend.” Ava waved to them as they walked out to Harry’s car.

These people were so nice to her. She’d thought she’d found a family in the Marines, but it had paled in comparison to how she felt with Harry’s team members and their women.

She sighed as she settled in the seat, hooking in her seatbelt when Harry slid into the driver’s side. He flashed her a smile that made her instantly warm. She could get used to being with Harry. When she’d first been rescued, a part of her didn’t want any connections. She’d feared what Harry would think of her. Now she knew she couldn’t last without him.

“Thank you for being willing to hang out with them. I just had to get something from Wild’s house.”

She nodded. “It was good to see them. I’ve never really seen a guy take so much interest in his kids. With my past, I didn’t know that guys helped that much.”

Harry slowed for a light. “Life is better when you are in a partnership with your partner. Both Wild and Bear seem to like taking care of their kids. They enjoy their family.”

She had to know what Harry wanted for his future. “Do you want kids?”

Harry met her gaze before the light changed. “I don’t know.”

The light changed, and he turned his focus to the road. She didn’t know what she wanted. Before being taken, she had been questioning life and staying in the Marines. Meeting Harry was part of that, but not all. She’d had offers that had been amazing enough to make her think about leaving. Then she’d found the files that implicated people in the military. It all seemed so weird now that she was on the other side. Had she been believed when she’d first brought evidence, she wouldn’t have been abducted. Living in the hell she’d survived had changed her. She wasn’t sure if she wanted kids. They were time-consuming and challenging. Could she actually stand up to the stress they would cause?

Harry slowed as he approached the turn-in for the parking garage. “I’m not sure I want to put that much stress on a partner.”

She turned to face him. “What do you mean?”

“I’m a SEAL. I know if I have kids, I could be absent for the birth. I’d be asking a lot of the person I was with. I know Ava and Ingrid have older kids, so it’s not so hard on them, but I’ve known guys who have been gone for most of their infant’s lives. Sometimes, their relationships don’t last. It’s hard on everyone.”

She nodded as Harry turned into the garage and pulled into his space. “I don’t know if I want kids either. With my job, I didn’t think I had time. Now, I’m not sure what I want in my future.”

Harry cut the engine. “Yeah. I don’t want to be the type of parent that isn’t there for my partner or the kids. I know Wild and Bear do it somehow, but they know they are sacrificing something when they leave for missions.” Harry reached for her hand. “I don’t want to pressure you into anything.”

“You aren’t.”

His gaze met hers, and she felt heat seeping in. She leaned in, needing to be close to him. Harry closed the distance, and his lips gently brushed over hers. A moan rose from inside, and she let it go, hoping the sound communicated how much she needed him.

He pulled back, and she thought she’d blown it. But his eyes were dark with need .

“If you don’t want this, just tell me. I’ll stop at any time.”

“I want this.”

He nodded and then opened his door. He was around the car to help her out in seconds. She needed to feel him and pressed her body up against his.

“Security cameras out here. Let’s go up so we have privacy,” Harry said as he clicked the lock for his car.

She nodded, half wanting to ignore the cameras. But he was right. They needed privacy. She could trust this man. He wasn’t at all like that jerk who’d abducted her then forced her to perform sex with others watching. He would never mistreat her that way.

Thoughts of the compound and things she’d been forced to endure filled her mind, and she shoved them away. She wanted to focus on Harry, but it was difficult to keep everything separate. She didn’t want to tell Harry to stop, so she had to force away anything that triggered her. She could do it, if she just focused enough and put Harry at the front of her mind.