40. Miles

40

MILES

The sun was setting behind me as I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the causeway. In the rearview mirror, hues of oranges, reds, yellows, purples, and pinks floated in the sky. It reminded me of the view when Zoe took me to the lookout spot.

So much had transpired since then. With the benefit of twenty-twenty hindsight, I wasn't sure I'd handled it all that well. This past month, I'd gone over every second we'd spent together, playing back in my head to see if there was something I could have changed to achieve a different outcome.

During the nights we'd spent together, we'd been physical, but we'd also talked. We talked about our childhoods. Our dreams. I'd told Zoe about growing up with the responsibility of caring for an alcoholic mom who would show up on sets drunk. She told me about her mom using religion as a weapon and how her dad's silence was as damaging as her mother's cruelty.

I'd shared more of who I was, the real me, with Zoe than I'd ever shared with anyone. In the end, it didn't matter. She was confused. She still hadn't thought we could work. She still hadn't believed what we had was real.

I hoped that four weeks was enough to give her clarity. If not, then I wasn't sure what I was going to do. At the very least, I would visit AJ, Walter, Harlan, and Dawson. I might even stay in town for a few days.

I'd missed Firefly. I missed Mrs. B and her cinnamon rolls. I missed Ray and his jambalaya and cooking lessons. I missed Billy Comfort and our dart games. I missed Ms. Shaw and her ‘news' aka gossip about the entire town.

This morning, I'd woken up and knew that I needed a change in my life. A drastic change. In a moment of extreme clarity, I knew exactly what I needed to do. All of the confusion that I'd been living with was instantly clear.

I had to try again with Zoe. One conversation was not enough. That was not enough to show her that I meant the words I said. She needed to see action behind those words.

So, I'd made the necessary arrangements and executed them after I got off the plane in Savannah. I'd waited until I got to Georgia to avoid any run-ins with TMZ at LAX. The paparazzi's interest had really ramped up over the past few weeks since Long Way Home came out. The last thing I wanted was news leaking before my surprise arrival in Firefly.

My console lit up, and I saw Braxton's name on the screen. I hit the answer button on my steering wheel.

"Hey."

"You fired Tyler," Braxton stated, skipping the pleasantries.

"Yep."

When I got off the plane, I sent the email I'd drafted this morning to him and the agency he worked for, cutting all ties after I found out that he was passing on projects without sending them to me after I'd turned down the superhero role as a way to ‘punish' me. He wanted me to think that offers had stopped coming through and that I'd been blacklisted. It was petty and stupid, considering he only made money when I worked because he got ten percent of my paychecks.

"Well, in the immortal words of Lizzo, it's about damn time." Braxton slow clapped on the other end of the line.

I chuckled. I'd always had a feeling that Braxton didn't like Tyler, but she'd never come right out and said it. She was pragmatic that way.

"And you put your house up for sale."

"Yep."

After I sent that email, I also sent another to my realtor, letting him know that I wanted to list my home. I was done living in Los Angeles. I'd never enjoyed the traffic there. Or the people. I was ready for a change.

"Any plans on where you're going?" she inquired.

"That depends."

"Let me guess, it depends on how a trip to Firefly Island goes."

"That's right."

"Are you there now?"

"Almost." I was just about to cross the city limits.

"Again, it's about damn time."

After I'd gone back to California and told Braxton that I'd poured my heart out to Zoe, and what her response was, she'd asked what I was going to do about it. I told her there was nothing to do. She'd had a different view of the situation. She'd immediately said that I needed to do more.

At the time, I'd been hurt, and after spending two months being a man who I knew I'd never live up to, honestly, I'd felt unworthy of Zoe. But now that I'd had a little space from the role and had more time to miss her, I just wanted to be with her. I'd make myself a man who deserved her.

"Are you good with holding down the fort at Ford Entertainment?"

"Do you really have to ask that?"

Braxton had not only settled into her new role in the production company; she was thriving. Under her leadership, it was growing at an exponential rate. We had four projects in development and three more that we had potential funding for. She'd had to hire additional staff just to keep up with the demand of our growth.

"Okay, well, keep me updated with how things go, and remember anything worth having…" her words trailed off.

"It's worth fighting for. I know." It was a poster she had on the wall of the production office. I was pretty sure she'd put it up just to annoy me because I wasn't a huge fan of motivational posters, but I couldn't be absolutely certain.

"Within reason, obviously," she amended. "If Zoe sets clear boundaries, then you have to respect them."

"Got it."

"The line between romantic gesture and stalker is a tightrope. Walk it carefully."

Now she was just fucking with me. "Goodbye, Braxton."

"Okay, wait," she chuckled. "I had to. You're too easy. Seriously, though, I'm really glad you're doing this. Whatever happens, Zoe's worth you putting your heart on the line one more time."

"She is," I wholeheartedly agreed.

"I just have one more question."

"What?"

"Do you have your boombox, John Cusack?" she asked, referencing the 80s movie Say Anything .

"Goodbye, Braxton."

This time, I did hang up. As I disconnected the call, I could hear her laughing at her own joke. To be honest, I was smiling too. But I didn't want her to know that.

What Braxton had said was the truth: Zoe was worth putting my heart on the line for one more time. Hell, she was worth putting my heart on the line for ten more times. A hundred more times.

As I drove past the Firefly Pier, I felt my body relax while simultaneously filling with nervous energy. It was the strangest sensation. I'd lived in the greater Los Angeles area all my life. I was born in the San Fernando Valley, and once I started acting, my mother moved us to the heart of Hollywood on Sunset Boulevard. The house I just put up for sale was in the Hollywood Hills. I'd traveled all over the globe for my job, but no place had ever felt like home to me. No place but Firefly Island.

From the first time, I'd pulled up videos on YouTube of the trolley tour and watched the documentary: What is Love? I'd felt a familiarity with this place, even though I'd never once stepped foot in it. Something drew me to it, just like something drew me to Zoe. There was a magnetic force that I couldn't explain. Both she and the town felt like home.

I was just passing Southern Comfort, where I'd spent dozens of nights with Harlan and Dawson, shooting pool and playing darts, when my phone rang again. I was sure it was Tyler calling to ask me either to come back or cuss me out. When I saw the name on the phone, I did a double take. It was Zoe.

She hadn't messaged or called me in the four weeks that I'd been back in L.A. I hadn't either because I'd been respecting her boundaries.

Was it a butt dial?

Had someone seen my SUV already?

I knew that news traveled fast in Firefly, but this was ridiculous.

I'd purposefully waited to send the emails until I landed, just so there was no press at the airport.

My heart jumped into my throat as I pushed the answer button. "Hello."

"Hi, um, Miles, this is Zoe."

I couldn't help but smile that she thought for a second I wouldn't know who she was. "I know."

"How are you?" she asked, her voice sounding a little shaky.

"I'm good, actually." It was so good to hear her voice. "How about you?"'

"Um, okay. I've been…it's been a tough month for me."

"Yeah, me, too. I've missed you. You and AJ. A lot."

"You have?"

She sounded genuinely surprised. It still boggled my mind that my feelings for her were at all in question.

"I haven't stopped thinking about you. You're all I think about," I confessed as I turned onto the street where she lived and saw her white Audi in the driveway.

"Oh, um, well, that's sort of why I was calling. I have missed you, too. A lot. So much, really. I even thought I was sick. I took a blood panel and everything, but I wasn't. I just missed you that much."

"Seriously?" I asked as I pulled up to her house and parked.

"Yes. And I think that… I know I said I was confused the last time we talked, but I'm not anymore. And if you still wanted to try and maybe be together. I mean, I know I saw you at the premier with Shelby?—"

"Shelby Denison is married."

"Married?" she repeated as I got out of the car.

"Yeah. I know her husband. He's her manager, and they want her image to be young and wild, so they asked me to walk the red carpet with her. I wouldn't have done it if I thought you would think?—"

She cut me off as I walked up to her door.

"No, it's fine; I didn't. Well, I did think. But I'm glad you're not. Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry that I was confused, and I'm not anymore. I don't know if it's too late, but I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date or something then; I would really like that. If that might be something, you would be interested in doing. I know that you live in L.A., and long distance would be—" I knocked on her door, and Daisy started barking loudly. "Sorry, there's someone at the door."

"I'll wait. You can get it."

"Daisy, stop!" she shouted.

My pulse was racing and my palms were tingling as I heard the click of the lock, and the door opened. When it did, I saw Zoe standing in her Atlanta Braves shirt and gray sweats. It was the same thing she'd worn the day I'd met her. My heart was pounding so hard in my chest, I was scared it was going to break one of my ribs.

"Sit, Daisy," Zoe instructed Daisy before looking up and seeing that I was standing on her doorstep.

When she did, she sucked in a startled breath, and the phone slipped from her hand. I reached out and grabbed it before it fell to the ground. Her hands were covering her mouth as she shook her head in disbelief.

"What are you doing here?" she mumbled into her palms.

"I woke up this morning, and I just…I had to see you. I had to try one more time to tell you how I felt. So, I packed up some things. I got on a plane. I fired my agent and put my house up for sale."

"You put your house up for sale ?!"

"I don't want to live in L.A. I've needed a change for a long time. I'd like to move here. Not here, not moving in with you, not yet." I grinned. "But in town. I want to be with you. I want us to be together. If that's okay with you."

"Yes." She smiled from ear to ear as she nodded. "Yes, it's okay with me."

Zoe threw her arms around my neck, and I picked her up as Daisy jumped up on us, joining in on our hug. I spun her around, and when I set her down, I saw Walter in the doorway of the kitchen, grinning from ear to ear.

"Well, you two don't waste much time, do ya?"

I had wasted time. I'd wasted a month, but I wasn't going to waste any more time. I planned on spending the rest of my life with Zoe. I was going to marry her. I was going to get down on one knee and ask her, just not yet. But one day. Hopefully, one day soon.