17. Zoe

17

ZOE

Four. Days. Alone.

For the next four days, I was going to be by myself. I couldn't remember the last time I'd had four days to myself. I was working doubles the next three days, but today I was off. I'd considered sending out the bat signal to the ladies to meet for drinks tonight, but for some reason, I hadn't pulled the trigger. Instead, it was going to be a bath, bottle of wine, and trash TV night in for me.

"Ten minutes!" I called up to AJ.

In ten minutes, I was dropping AJ off to head to science camp. Walter left this morning on his annual fishing trip with his Army buddies. Every year, they went down to the Florida Keys. They had been doing it for the past fifty years. It started with eight guys, and now it was down to four. About ten years ago, they'd started placing bets on who would make it to the next year, which I thought was a little morbid, but they seemed to enjoy it.

"Mom! Where are my socks?!" AJ bellowed from his room.

"In your drawer!" I shouted back.

Since hearing Miles talk to AJ about dyslexia, I'd done even more research into it and realized that a lot of the things that used to frustrate me about AJ—leaving his cleats at the bottom of the stairs, him asking me where things were when I think it should be obvious, him forgetting things he needs for school at home, him forgetting he has practice—were just how his brain works. It's not that it gave him a pass or he shouldn't work on those things, but it did give me more understanding and insight that he wasn't just disregarding things I told him or that he didn't care about my rules.

When I spoke to Walter about what Miles had said and that I thought Austin might have also been dyslexic, he agreed with me. He even recalled that he himself had not been able to pay attention in school, and he'd had a difficult time in reading and math because the letters and numbers didn't make sense to him. In my research, I also learned that dyslexia is genetic. If one parent has it, there is a 30-50% chance of inheriting it.

I felt a little foolish that I was in the medical field, and yet I knew so little about the condition. I was naive in thinking that it only affected AJ's reading comprehension. I was and would forever be grateful to Miles for educating me on the subject.

Every time I thought about sending him something to tell him how grateful I was, it started with a card or flowers or an edible arrangement, but my mind quickly took a detour into the gutter. I fantasized about showing up on his doorstep in a trench coat and edible underwear. I thought about dropping to my knees and showing just how much I appreciated him.

Every time I thought about Miles, my mind turned into a porno. I'd never thought about sex as much as I'd thought about it the past few weeks. It was constant and very unnerving. I wasn't sure what sort of Pandora's box he'd unleashed in me, but whatever it was, I needed it to close again.

AJ came bounding down the stairs, snapping me out of my inappropriate thoughts. He had his duffle bag slung over his shoulder, and I practically had to superglue my hands at my sides so as not to unzip it and check to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything.

He'd insisted on packing himself, which I understood he needed to do. He was growing up, and I didn't want to stunt his development. The only saving grace to his newfound independent streak and the pitfalls it might result in was that there was a store at the campsite that I could call and give my credit card info to so he could get anything he'd forgotten.

"Do you have your toothbrush?"

He nodded as he dropped his bag and walked past me to the kitchen.

"Your underwear?" I asked as he grabbed a piece of cold fried chicken from the fridge.

I'd made it last night again because Walter scarfed it down the night Miles had shown up on the doorstep, and I needed to make sure he had some calories in his body to fortify him on his trip to Florida.

"Yes," AJ replied with a mouth full of chicken.

"Shampoo."

"Uh-huh." He nodded.

"Bug spray."

"Yes. I have everything ." He brushed past me and grabbed his bag again.

"Phone charger."

He froze, dropped his bag to the floor with a thud, then ran back upstairs.

While I waited, my phone vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw it was a message from Miles. He'd been hanging out in town, but I hadn't seen him. He'd taken Walter out for lunch a few times, and he was spending time with Harlan and Dawson. He'd even visited Austin's football and baseball coaches.

Miles: I have meetings today, but tonight I'm going to go over the tapes for your character and was wondering if you'd like to see them.

"Who's that?" AJ asked as he hopped off the last step, his charger in hand.

"Um, it's Miles."

AJ's face lit up. "Is it about my part?"

Ever since Braxton had called and told him he got the role, he'd barely talked about anything else. I knew he was excited because it was a movie about his dad, but I had a sneaking suspicion his enthusiasm might have something to do with Kendall being in the film. too. He told me they were going to work on their scenes at camp together.

"Um, no." I put my phone back in my pocket.

"Why do you look like that?" His face scrunched up.

"Like what?" I asked.

"Your cheeks are all red."

I lifted my hand and touched my face. My cheeks were hot. I was flushed.

"I don't know. I've been running around trying to get you ready."

He stared at me for a second before shrugging and then heading out to the car. The whole ride to the school was spent with him on his phone texting. When we pulled up to the curb, I expected him to bolt out before the car even came to a complete stop. Instead, he sat for a second silently, then turned to me.

"What's wrong?" I asked, wondering if he might be nervous about going away. He'd been to baseball camp before and gone on camping trips and never had any problem with leaving home before.

"Is it weird for you that some other person is going to be pretending to be you and dad?"

I wasn't sure how to answer that. "Um, I don't really; I guess I'm not thinking about it like that. I just think of them as characters."

"Well, I'm gonna try really hard to do a good job at being Dad."

Tears filled my eyes. Every time I didn't think I could love AJ any more, he did or said something that proved me wrong. The fact that he was going to be playing his dad and wanted to do a good job filled my heart with so much love. I leaned over to hug him.

He allowed it for a second before pulling away. "Okay, I gotta go."

After getting his duffle bag from the trunk, I watched as he walked up to the bus. Kendall was there waiting for him. She smiled and gave him a hug. It was strange to think they were around the same age that Austin and I were. I remember feeling so grown up, but we really were just kids.

When AJ glanced back over at me, I quickly pulled away from the curb before he gave me a dirty look for spying on him. As I did, the text from Miles scrolled through my brain like a ticker tape.

Did I want to see the tapes of the actresses who were going to be playing me?

Maybe.

Did I want to see Miles?

Yes. Absolutely.

Should I see him?

No. Probably not.

My mind was still going back and forth when I pulled up in the driveway and my phone rang. It was Miles.

"Hi," I answered, sounding a little more breathless than I meant to.

"Hi. I texted you but wanted to make sure you saw it."

"Yeah, I did. Sorry, I was dropping AJ off for science camp."

"Well, I'd really love your input on these tapes if you'd be willing to look at them."

"Yeah, sure. Yes. I would."

"Okay, I can send you the address of the production office."

"Great. It's in the old tire building, right?"

"I think that's what Braxton said."

"What time is good for you?"

"I have a call at five, so is six good?"

"Yeah, great."

"Okay, I'll see you then."

"See you then. Bye."

"Bye."

"Bye." I hung up the phone after realizing I'd said bye twice.

Why had I just agreed to meet Miles to look at audition tapes? This was a bad idea. I checked the time; it was seven-fifteen. I had a little less than eleven hours to get over whatever stupid crush I had.

I could do that. Sure. Yeah. But, I needed to figure out what I was going to wear, blow out my hair, and shave. And, get over this stupid crush.