Chapter 15

Chapter

Fifteen

Ryan parked in Aelin's driveway and turned to Amaya. "Okay, you good?"

Amaya yawned and unbuckled her seatbelt. Ryan had felt guilty waking her up at six, but she knew it was only two weeks of this. He needed to be at the rink at three, which meant he had to start work at seven instead of nine.

He left the engine idling and got out to walk her to the front door. "Remember to be respectful and listen to Aelin, okay?"

Amaya rolled her eyes. "I'm not five, Dad."

Ryan let out a puff of air. "Right."

They walked up the steps to the front door, and Ryan texted instead of knocking since Bailey was most likely still asleep.

It only took a few seconds for Aelin to open the door. She gave a small wave and moved to the side so Amaya could walk into the hall.

Ryan blinked. He'd seen her at all times of day and night, and, not that he was an expert or anything, something looked off. She was in cotton shorts and thick socks, a robe tied around her middle. It wasn't that. Was she trying to hide her face?

She moved to close the door, but he put out a hand. "Hey. "

Aelin's lips pinched. She didn't turn to face him, instead messing with the side of her welcome mat with her socked foot. "Have a great day." She pushed on the door again, and this time, Ryan full-on palmed it.

"Aelin, what?—"

"Please don't, Ryan." Aelin turned her back on him. "I'm fine."

"You don't seem fine."

She waved a hand over her shoulder. "It's nothing anyone else can help with, and I promise it won't affect our plans today."

Ryan knew he shouldn't, but the urge to reach out and touch her was all-consuming. He gave in and put a hand on her shoulder. As soon as he made contact, Aelin spun toward him, burying her head in his chest and wrapping her arms around his waist.

She felt exactly as he'd imagined. He didn't realize he'd imagined it until her hands pressed against his lower back and the top of her head nestled beneath his chin. That was where she fit. Exactly right.

He rubbed his hand over her back, parts of him noticing instantly that she wasn't wearing a bra. He reeled that thought back in only to be slammed with the scent of coconut in her hair.

He didn't say anything. He didn't think about the fact that he was supposed to be heading downtown. He didn't think about what Amaya would think if she rounded the corner and saw him holding another woman like that.

No part of his rational brain fired. He only knew that it felt right to have her there. She was hurting. So many people in his life were hurting. The idea that he could alleviate it for even a few seconds made him feel invincible.

"Clark's trying to sell the house." Aelin sniffed, her breathing beginning to return to normal.

Ryan swallowed. "Can he do that? "

She nodded against his chest, then pushed back, her cheeks flushed. They stained an even deeper pink when she saw the dark spots on his lavender-collared shirt. "Shit, I'm so sorry." Aelin hunted for a tissue, but Ryan stopped her.

"They'll dry. I still have to drive into work. It's fine."

Aelin wrapped her arms around herself, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy. "I'm sorry. I found out last night, and I didn't sleep much."

He shoved his hands in his pockets. "Take a nap today."

She bit her lower lip and nodded. "Yeah. I might have time this afternoon." She finally looked up and met his eyes. "Thank you."

"No problem. I can't imagine."

Aelin sighed. "Yeah. I think you probably can." Her eyes flickered to the floor, then back to his. "Anyway . . ."

Ryan nodded. "Sorry. I'll—have a good day. I mean, not a good day, but . . . you know what I mean."

Aelin's mouth quirked at the corner. "I will."

Ryan left, pulled out of the driveway, and drove straight to his office on fourth. He didn't stop for Tim's like he'd planned, which was fine. They had coffee in the office, and while it wasn't exactly good, it would deliver caffeine to his bloodstream.

He parked in the garage under the building, then swiped his key card and walked into the lobby. Somehow he managed to step out of the elevator on the fifth floor just a few minutes after seven. He waved to the security guard and headed to his desk, flipping on the light switch.

The hum of the fluorescent lights filled the room, and Ryan sat down, pulling up his email. He had a list of things to do a mile long for the contamination mitigation, and he started going down the list.

He'd spent the last few nights poring over their contracts with the city, trying to find a loophole that would let them off the hook, but it was airtight. They were responsible for the cleanup, and that meant more work for him and more money lost for Apex. He knew which one Marc would be most concerned with.

Ryan pulled up the latest report and started reading through it, his mind already spinning with ideas.

He was so engrossed in his work that he didn't hear the door open. "You look like you just got neutered."

Ryan looked up to see Chris standing in the doorway. "Couldn't finish it. Balls were too big for the incision."

Chris snorted. "Hockey camp starts today, eh?"

"If Marc doesn't rip me a new one by three." Ryan took a drink of his tepid coffee.

"Get in line on that one. Your asshole will probably stay intact until at least Wednesday."

He set his mug down. "Perfect. You need anything?"

Chris shook his head. "Heading to Pips for lunch if you're feeling fancy."

Ryan stuck out his foot and pulled up his pant leg to reveal pink socks. "I had a good feeling when I got dressed this morning."

Chris laughed. "I'll get Morton and Sask to come along."

Ryan scoffed. "If it's not a date, I'm out." He waved as Chris walked down the hall and returned to his spreadsheet, but his head had travelled far from remediation efforts.

He picked up his phone and swiped to his messages, tapping on Aelin's contact.

Hey, dinner's over, but we're thinking about stopping by the music festival. Okay to be out a bit longer?

He looked at his response, remembering what he'd wanted to type instead. Hell, no. Offering to watch Bailey while she went out was the right thing to do, but he didn't like it. He'd paced around the house all night finding things to clean and fix, and it still hadn't eased the straight-out-of-the-dryer feeling in his chest.

Getting that real-time update and then watching her sip her tea across the counter had been the reason he'd gone to the rink first thing on Canada Day. Amaya was with her grandparents at the Crossfield parade, so Sean, Tyler, André, and Suraj had all met him for a line-scraper practice. By the time he left, he'd felt a bit more in control of himself.

Only to have to sit and watch Aelin on his daughter's tablet for an hour and pretend he wasn't paying attention every time she reached up and tucked hair behind her ear or laughed at whoever the hell she was talking with. Guy from the music festival?

Then there was that morning. The scent of her still lingered on his shirt, and each time he caught a whiff, he needed another minute before he could stand up and walk out from behind his desk.

Okay. He leaned back in his chair, linking his hands behind his head. He'd known he was attracted to her from the start, which was why he'd implemented his plan to keep a distance. He'd mostly succeeded in that, and now that he was in camp, it would be easier, wouldn't it?

She'd be dropping Amaya off at the rink, so he'd only see her one-on-one in the morning. He could stay on the street. Wave from the car.

Even as he said it, his body revolted. But what was the alternative? Keep getting closer to her, and then what? He couldn't do anything about it. He wouldn't cheat on Kara. Having friendships with women wasn't a big deal, but based on how tight his pants were, he didn't anticipate his body cooperating in this situation.

Ryan reached for the photo of him, Kara, and Amaya that sat on his desk. He ran his finger over the ridges of the frame, then slid it back into place and turned back to his spreadsheet.

_____

The drive to the Carpenter's Ice Centre was a blur, not because he was zoned out, but because he sped like a banshee. He pulled into the parking lot, grabbed his gear, and jogged to the entrance.

Inside, the rink was already buzzing with activity. Parents and kids milled about, their voices echoing off the cinder block walls. The smell of ice and rubber mats sent him straight back to practices as a kid, no matter how many times he'd set foot there as an adult.

He made his way to the Gold rink and waved at Country, already in his gear standing at the benches behind the boards with a clipboard.

"Hey, bud. Sorry I'm late." Ryan headed for the locker room.

"You've got plenty of time to get suited."

It was true, but since he'd been the one to spearhead this project, he didn't want to be the one dragging down the ship.

Tyler and Boyd were in the locker room, lacing up their skates.

Tyler looked up. "Ready to bust some asses?"

"Busting all the asses. Let's make them puke."

Boyd laughed and stood. "Is Amaya coming tonight?"

Ryan nodded. "I can't tell if she's excited or not."

"She's been on skates since she was three. I'm sure she'll be fine," Tyler said.

Ryan dropped his bag on the bench and started stripping down. "She's just . . . I don't know . . . turning more girly all of a sudden. "

Tyler grabbed his helmet off the bench. "Hasn't she always been like that?"

"A little. I guess. But now she just wants to spend time with friends."

Tyler laughed. "Ah. She's ditching you. That's the problem." He walked over and clapped a hand on his shoulder. "Hate to tell you this, bud, but that's not being girly. That's just growing up."

Boyd laughed. "When you have kids, bud, then you can come chirp at him about what's growing up and what isn't. Until then, grab a sippy cup, and leave the parenting-talk to the ones wrangling the ankle-biters."

Ryan saluted him, and Tyler flipped him the bird. Tyler and Boyd left the locker room, and Ryan was quick to follow. He was adjusting the board for passing drills when he saw a familiar face bouncing up and down behind the glass. He grinned and skated over to the entrance to the rink, noting the smirk on Country's face as he pointed his head directly at Aelin and then back at him. Subtle.

"You made it." Ryan held out his arms, and Amaya flew into them. "How was your day?"

She grinned up at him. "Amazing. We made a fairy garden."

Ryan looked up at Aelin. She looked better. Her hair was swept back in a braid and her eyes didn't look swollen. "Fairy garden?"

Aelin shrugged. "I had some craft supplies in the closet. The girls got creative."

"One of the houses has lights!" Amaya's eyes gleamed, and for a moment, Ryan could barely breathe. He would never have thought to do something like that with her. He'd spent an embarrassing amount of time on Pinterest searching up ideas for what to do with little girls over the past three years, but he usually opted for things that didn't require walking into a store with cinnamon brooms at the entrance .

"Go get dressed, okay?" He straightened as Amaya scurried back to the piles of equipment along the back wall.

"That's all for the camp?"

Ryan nodded. "One of the main reasons kids don't participate in hockey is the cost of equipment. My teammates and I ran a donation and swap centre last winter. We have enough for fifteen kids, so hopefully the twelve in the camp will be able to find something that fits."

"And they'll use it for the whole week?" She wrinkled her nose.

Ryan laughed. "You've never played hockey?"

"I played roller hockey back home."

"Which is?"

"California."

The whole conversation happened so fast, he'd forgotten he wasn't supposed to be doing this. Doing what, exactly? He could be having this conversation with any random stranger. He was in a public place. His friends were right there on the ice.

"We lived at the end of a cul-de-sac. Our neighbours had four boys."

"Chaos."

Aelin grinned, and her eyes glittered in the overhead lights. "Absolutely."

"Dad!" Amaya came running back over, dragging the gear she'd found. "Can Bailey stay for the camp?"

Aelin's smile faded. "Oh, no, Bails. I didn't sign you up."

"That's alright. If she wants to stay?—"

"I don't think?—"

"Yes!" Bailey nodded her head emphatically. "I know how to skate, Mom."

Aelin opened her mouth, then closed it. He could see the wheels turning in her head. "I didn't bring your skates."

"You could just go home and get them." Bailey stood with her hands clasped behind her back, and Ryan turned his face so she wouldn't see him grinning .

"You think this is funny?"

Ryan turned to find Aelin staring right at him. "Only because it's not happening to me right now."

Aelin motioned for Bailey to come closer. She lowered her voice. "I know this sounds fun, but I didn't sign you up for this. It costs money, and?—"

"She can stay for free." Ryan didn't even think before blurting it out.

Aelin turned. "Not exactly helping."

He nodded. "Sorry. I didn't?—"

"It's not that I don't want her to stay, but I don't expect you to offer me a discount."

"That's more than a discount," Amaya said. "That's a hundred percent off."

"Thank you, Amaya," Ryan muttered, hoping the other guys didn't hear her piercing voice echoing across the ice. They wouldn't care if he offered Bailey a slot, but they'd definitely connect the dots between a free entry to camp and the fact the kid he'd offered it to was Aelin's.

Aelin looked back at Bailey. "The house is twenty minutes away. You'd miss the whole first hour of camp if I went back and got your skates."

Ryan glanced up at the clock above the rink. "How about this. Why don't you join us for camp next week? That will give you time to sign the waivers and get your gear in order. Your mom won't have to drive back and forth. Then Amaya can help me out this week and you two can hang out as camp kids next week?"

Bailey considered this. "I guess that could work."

Aelin let out a breath and mouthed, "Thank you."

Amaya's shoulders slumped, but she was appeased enough by his solution that she didn't argue. She walked over and gave Bailey a hug. "See you tomorrow." When Aelin and Bailey were out of earshot, Amaya turned to him. "Can you help me put this on? "

Ryan looked down at his hands and flipped them back and forth.

Amaya scoffed. "I know I have hands, Dad, but it'll go faster if you help."

He grinned. "Only if you help me put out cones."

She gave him a thumbs-up, and he stepped off the ice to help her.

"You know the week after hockey camp?" Amaya asked, her voice oddly high-pitched.

"Yes." Ryan was wary.

"I know you don't have work off because we're taking the next week off for vacation, right? That's what it says on the calendar."

Ryan frowned. He didn't realize she'd been looking at that. "That was the plan, but?—"

"I was thinking I could go to the lake."

Ryan pulled back to look at her. "You could go to the lake? What lake?"

Amaya pulled the shoulder pads over her head. "I wouldn't go by myself. I could go with Aelin and Bailey."

That rang a bell. Right. Her vacation. The reason he'd switched his week at work. Aelin had said it was because they were going down to Flathead with her family. "I don't think you can just invite yourself along to a family vacation."

"I didn't invite myself. Bailey invited me." She stepped into the shorts Ryan held out for her.

"Bailey's not in charge."

Amaya shrugged. "Aelin was right there. She didn't say no."

"Probably being polite."

Amaya's expression clouded. "Why are you being grumpy about this? You're going to be working, and what am I going to do? I don't want to go to grandma and grandpa's all week. I love their house, but Bailey's going to a huge lake! Her uncle has a boat, and they're going to go tubing and do campfires, and I've always wanted to learn how to water ski, and?— "

"Amaya." Ryan's tone was sharper than he intended. He drew a breath and sat back on his haunches. "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap. I was going to wait to tell you this, but I switched my week off so I would be home the week that Aelin's gone. I was thinking?—"

"That's perfect!" Amaya's eyes lit up. "We could go to the lake together!"