4. Grey

My God,it's been a long as fuck night. And to piss me off even more, I didn't catch the assholes who beat the ever-lovin' fuck out of Jeffries. When we finally got back to the house, he was out cold while Josey sat on the couch keeping an eye on him. Don't know much about her, except that shit happened to her overseas and think, from what I heard, it was a gang of our own who did it. Would like to meet them in a dark alley, for sure. Guess if you like the girl next door look that is so totally Josey. She's sweet, quiet, and has a big heart.

"How's he doing, Josey?"

"Not bad, Grey, Dr. Cora said he might have a slight concussion and some badly bruised ribs, that's why I hung out here. Hope you don't mind. Ollie didn't want to leave him alone."

"No worries, thanks for keeping an eye on him. I got it from here. Thanks again. Give me a text when you make it back to the sanctuary."

She gathers her stuff and as she walks out, Phantom strolls in with a huge smirk on his face. Knowing I shouldn't ask but I can't help myself for some reason with him.

"So what's the smirk for, you asshole apparition?"

For a quick second I see something in his eyes I can't make out before he returns to the usual sarcastic look on his face.

"Damn, Grey, how long has it been since you fucked a woman? That one was looking you up and down like a wolf might an elk, moose, caribou, or even a bison, for shit's sake. All you had to do was play nice and I'm sure you'd have had a roller coaster of a ride. But no, not you, Greyson, as usual you think it's better to turn on your asshole side. No wonder you like to be by yourself, probably only person who can handle your type of bullshit is you."

I give him a small smile before taking in a breath. This man doesn't know shit about me, though he's standing here judging me. Well, fuck 'em, don't care. Ain't got time for a woman, especially one who knows her own worth. Also, I can tell she believes in her soul's work, which I can secretly admire, but don't need any of that "trouble" in my life and, for sure Abigale is a problem I don't have the time or heart to deal with. Though I admire her tenacity to try to protect the wolves, but nothing lasts or lives forever. Forgetting somehow that Phantom is sitting directly across from me, I shift to try and get a bit more comfortable, trying to not let my mind wander to Abigale.

When neither of us says a single word, it gets uncomfortable pretty quick. I know in normal times I can hold my own so not going to worry about spilled milk. I mean, for the most part, Ollie made sure we all have our regime that we need or else. I know Phantom's been trying to figure me out, but it ain't happening. Ollie and Paisley I trust but anyone else I've learned my lesson. I trusted before and each time was a bigger clusterfuck than the last.

"What's the matter, Grey, got something against the opposite sex? Or am I chasing the wrong bear up the tree with you? Maybe you would prefer a more masculine type. Hey, no judgment, dude, I totally believe love is love. Be proud, I doubt anyone here at the sanctuary would give a shit. Anyway, let me know if you need anything else for the wimp in the bedroom or the wolves and the pretty bleeding heart. I'll let Ollie and Paisley know what's going on so they are up to date, though I'm pretty sure Paisley probably reached out to the pretty tree hugger already. Later, Grey. Oh, I get you're not to fuckin' fond of me but if you ever need an ear, just give me a shout out, I'd be here in no time. Later, brother."

With that he turns, struts to the door, then walks out, shutting it quietly. Yeah, I can be a total dick at times when I want to be. Worse since I was honorably discharged after that last mission. My pain-in-the-ass therapist has told me that is something I need to work on, since it won't go well with starting over. I'm aware of that and simply don't give a fuck. Tomorrow's another day. First, I'll do one more check on Jeffries then a much-needed drink is called for. Quietly, I walk into Jeffries's bedroom and see he's sawing boards like a grizzly during hibernation. I bet Dr. Cora gave him something for pain, which is good, because he needs sleep to let his poor battered body rest and start healing.

After grabbing a Michelob, I walk to the deck and sit down, looking up. The one thing I've fallen in love with since I've come up to Montana is the sky. During the day it is the brightest blue I've ever seen and, at night, it is usually clear and there are a million plus stars. Just leaning back, eyes open, looking up relaxes not only my body but my soul also. When I was overseas, most of the areas my missions took place were locations that didn't even come close to this type of sky. Not to mention, I had to keep my eyes and head in the game all the time. Twenty-four seven. I slowly work through the beer while just tryin' to relax and chill, and not think about the woman I met tonight. When I'm done, I throw the glass bottle in our recycling bin then lock up. I look in on Jeffries one last time on my way to my bedroom. Once there, I strip down, throwing my dirty clothes in the hamper pushed in the corner of the walk-in closet.

Wearing only my birthday suit, I head to the toilet, take care of business, then get in the shower to wash the smell of "wolf" off of me. While washing, my mind goes back to when I was a kid. Always told whoever would listen that one day I'd have a wolf of my own. Researched as I got older and learned all about them. Then life happened and I joined the service. The rest is history. On my way to bed, I grab a pair of boxer briefs, pulling them up. Reaching for the covers, I fling them down and get into bed. Phantom's words are lingering in my head, which is pissing the fuck outta me 'cause that look of longing, desire, or plain old goddamn lust on Abigale's face has me in knots. I felt my cock getting hard and I'm sure if I hadn't controlled it, she would have seen the same look on my face. Everything about that woman has my body reacting even now, hours later. Nope, not gonna go there. I'm nowhere near ready to start any kind of relationship. I've come to really despise people in general, so the thought of following my basic instincts and fucking her hard has me on the fence. If she was traveling through or a tag chaser that would be different. Abigale, damn, just that name sends a hot needy feeling to my balls. Shit, I need to get laid, that's for sure. Anyway, my brain goes back to the thought that since we live in the same town, I don't want to have to go through the bullshit when after a good hard fuck or two the woman generally wants to pursue something, while the guy just wanted to get laid.

Pulling the covers over me, I take a quick minute or five to do the deep breathing exercises the therapist wants me to do every night before I drift off to sleep. She thinks it might help me with the nightmares that plague me. They are getting less frequent but, fuck, when they hit, I'm usually done the next day. Crossing my fingers, I hope tonight is a good one. That's my last thought, well actually, my second to last as my very last thought is me wondering what Abigale looks like naked. Yeah, had to go there as my hand pushes on my dick to try and calm it down.

Don't know what's going on or where I'm at, but something is holding me down, and I'm giving it my all to break free. That's until l hear a familiar voice screaming.

"Damn it, Grey, knock that shit off. I'm bruised enough. Brother, take a deep breath. Come on, I'll do it with you. In, hold for a count of at least eight, then slowly release. Again, that's it, you're getting it. All right, sit the hell up, I'm gonna grab some paper towels for the blood coming out of my nose thanks to you, ya dumbfuck."

Slowly I sit up and open my eyes fully. Shit, I see drops of blood all over the bed, floor, and even splattered on the walls. Damn, I was down deep 'cause usually I can detect Jeffries. My hands push through my hair as I lean forward, elbows going to my knees. My head is pounding and since I refuse to take any kind of controlled substance, I tend to suffer. The therapist leads with his sarcastic mouth and, being the jerk he is, reminds me at the beginning of every session how much better I'd feel if I just follow the protocol. Fuck him, don't want to feel drugged.

"Grey, you okay? Sorry, I tried to give you some space 'cause I so get it but, damn, buddy, you were goin' at someone in your dreams and not in a good way. Not gonna ask 'cause I already know you won't share shit with me. Brought you some water and Tylenol for your head. No, don't ask, I just recognize the symptoms. I'll leave ya to it, brother, but if you need me ya know where to find me. Get some sleep, boss."

I watch Jeffries turn and walk out. I gulp the water after I throw the pills in my mouth. Knowing it's going to take at least twenty to thirty minutes, I clear my thoughts of everything, including that majestic wolf tugging at my heartstrings. Those eyes are forever imbedded into my memory and soul. I'm so totally screwed as a dream of having a wolf as a best friend is in the forefront of my brain and the woman who is doing everything she can to save the animals every single rancher in Montana wants gone. My gut is telling me this isn't the end of the assholes who mistreated the wolves. I'll let Ollie contact the sheriff, maybe he can figure out who's responsible. I'm just glad Jeffries and the entire family of wolves are stable.

With that thought I start to drift off, with the last thought of those beautiful dimples in Abigale's cheeks. Well, at least her dimples in the cheeks I could see.