Chapter Thirty-Five

Graves

“Jesus Christ, Mallory, be careful.” She falls back as I open the door, lucky to have caught her before she fell and cracked her neck. The thought softens my dick.

“A heads up would’ve been nice,” she snips and I chuckle. I help her back into a proper sitting position in the truck.

“Are you going to put your pants back on so I can show you around, or would you rather stay here?” Mallory glares daggers at me and I just shoot a big toothy grin right back at her. She melts at the sight, I’m so goddamn lucky to have met her. Relenting, she wiggles around, pulling up her pants, and straightening her clothes. On shaky legs, she hops down from the truck and closes the door. Her hair is all fucked up from being shoved against the door so she fixes that too. In some sexy Baywatch reminiscent hair flip, she undoes it and then redoes it up in a bun. My heart thumps, she looks exactly like she did that first day. The one that set me on this fucked up path.

I extend my hand and for a second she hesitates. I freeze at the thought of her rejecting me. But, then she reaches out and weaves her fingers through mine and all is right in my little world for now.

I lead us down to the dock, desperately wanting to push her into the water then jump in after her. We could share some fun, wildly romantic moment together. But, that will lead to stripping and I can’t do that. This game of playing two people is really getting on my nerves. I seriously hope she comes to the conclusion she wants both Ghost and I sooner rather than later.

She sits near the end of the dock and pulls me down next to her. We sit in comfortable silence, basking in the late afternoon sun. I could almost drift off from contentment. The monster in my chest is peaceful for once. Even being around Mallory in the mask isn’t enough to satiate him completely. But this? This has him, me, docile as a lamb.

I move and she startles. She too must have been lost in her thoughts, not in the same way as before though. Her eyes didn’t glaze over and become completely vacant. She’s probably worrying about Ghost, and what will happen to me if she doesn’t stop this. Even though she doesn’t want to.

I won’t do anything drastic, this is what I want in the end. I need to let her get away with her charade of dating us both for long enough that real concrete feelings develop.

I lay my head in her lap and she smiles down at me. Removing my CCPD ball cap, she starts to run her fingers through my hair.

A sigh of blissful satisfaction passes my lips as her melodic voice floats out into the silence. “What made you want to become a cop?”

Her question holds more weight than she knows, and I juggle whether to actually tell her the full story or water it down, like I do for everyone else.

I know so much about her, it’s only fair to reveal the tip of my iceberg to her.

“Well, it was a mix of a few different things. My upbringing mostly, and my uncle’s influence on me,” I answer. A small scrunch of her nose tells me that she didn’t like that answer so I quickly correct myself.

“He didn’t push or pressure me into this career. Actually, it was quite the opposite. He tried to steer me away from it, worried that the job would be too triggering for me.”

She nibbles on her bottom lip, clearly wanting to know what I mean by that, but she’s too apprehensive to ask. I’m thankful that I know her so well in this moment. I can lead the conversation in the direction she wants based on her face and body language alone. So, I continue the heinous story.

“Okay, so basically…my uncle isn’t actually my uncle. I’m adopted.” She nods, gesturing with her hands for me to keep going. I appreciate the encouragement.

“When I was nine, I was removed from my parent’s care. A neighbour had called the police one night for a welfare check on the house. She’d heard my parents screaming at each other on and off for hours. This apparently was normal, but what terrified our neighbour was the abrupt silence that overcame my childhood home.” I watch her features morph as she absorbs the story that unloads the trauma from which my sick alter ego was created.

“My father killed my mother that night, wrapped his hands around her neck and choked the life out of her. Then he came looking for me. He ignored the incessant screaming of our neighbour at the door, knocking and banging on it until her hands bled. She knew I was in there, she tried tirelessly to get in and save me.” I raise my eyes to Mallory’s. Hers are glassy, welling with barely restrainable tears for the young boy I used to be.

“Father dearest was destroying the house in his hunt to find me. The neighbour helplessly watched as he overturned furniture, tore apart every closet, kitchen cabinet, and even the appliances he somehow thought I could fit into. She eventually smashed out a window and climbed through in an attempt to help me in some way. My father shot her without blinking.” Mallory chokes back a sob as her tears hit my cheek. I sit up, wanting to comfort her, but she places her hand on my chest and pushes me back down into her lap.

“Finish the story,” she shakily croaks out.

“I was hiding in the attic, from the time the fight started until the cops found me, huddled in a corner with my blanket and stuffed dinosaur. I only know all the gory details of the case because I looked it up when I finally became an officer.”

A silent sob racks her body and I finally sit up and pull her into my lap. Embracing my little siren in the comfort she needs, her arms wrap around my neck as she gathers her composure. Using the sleeve of my shirt I wipe the tears from her face and place a soft kiss on her forehead.

She sniffles, “Is there more?” she asks.

I sigh, “Yes, but I think that is enough for now. It sucks, digging it up, you know?” I kiss her cheek and she nods in acceptance.

“I know it’s not easy reliving your trauma like that. I’m sorry,” she offers.

“It’s okay, I wouldn’t have told you if I didn’t want you to know. My past is heavy and I don’t want it to ruin this time I have with you.”She smiles and leans into me. I feel lighter after offering a piece of myself up to her and having her accept it. Maybe it won’t feel like dragging my naked body across shards of broken glass to let her see all of me. All of my fucked up jagged pieces that fit so perfectly against hers.

“Can I ask you something?” I say. She tenses slightly in my arms but I need to have her realize this.

“Yeah, sure,” she replies as hesitation drips off her words.

“Why don’t you think you’re good enough for me?” If I thought she tensed up before, then this has her frozen solid, rigid and uncomfortable against me. I turn her chin to face me.

“Please, tell me.” Mustering the biggest puppy dog eyes I can, and she fakes a smile. I hate that, no fake fa?ades with me, baby.

“What happened to ten seconds ago when you didn’t want to ruin our time together?”

“Tick tock, little s-sweetheart.”

Her eyes shoot to mine and narrow significantly. Shit, what a colossal fucking slip up on my part. I crash my lips onto hers in an effort to erase any thoughts she has bubbling up inside that magnificent mind. She liquifies in my hold as her lust for me snuffs out everything else. I sneakily pull out the burner phone I use to text her as Lennox Graves and somehow manage to open the camera app. I snap picture after picture of us. Our mouths moving together, tongues tangling. I switch it to video mode. Yeah, I’ll definitely be beating my meat to this later since I can’t fuck her as Nox. It may be the hottest thing I’ve ever seen, her surrendering herself to me. Watching the feelings I’ve planted within her take root and start to bloom.

I’m so very pleased with myself when she realizes she’s being recorded and I get her whole hilarious reaction on film. Her infectious laugh, face reddening in embarrassment, her failed attempts at intimidating me to delete the clip. Never.

“Tit for tat, it’s only fair, Mallory,” I pant out. Too much energy spent on restraining myself after her hot body kept rubbing against mine, trying endlessly to nab my phone.

Her smile fades away as she realizes I’m not going to let this go.

“You aren’t the only one with a traumatic past. I’m so glad Captain Graves adopted you and saved your life, but my abuse didn’t end until a few months ago.” She crawls out of my embrace to sit cross legged in front of me. I scowl, you get your ass back here, little siren.

“I can’t even imagine what you’ve had to endure, baby, but you don’t need to hide from me.”

“I’m not hiding. I’m giving you space in case you want nothing to do with me afterwards.” Her voice is so hushed I can barely make it out. I can’t make her relive this, it could be a setback in all the progress she’s made thus far.

“That will never happen,” I utter the words as she undoes the bun on the top of her head. Her long black tresses hide her face as she turns away from me, looking out at the water and to the woods behind it.

“I’ve been abused in one way or another since I was old enough to remember it. It only stopped after my mom and stepdad went missing. That night at the hotel, when you saw Edward getting rough with me… I was terrified I was going to be assaulted again.” Oh, I want to kill him all over again. Sever his dick from his body and make him choke on it, the same way I’m sure he did to Mallory.

“I know it’s horrible of me to say, but I’m glad my parents abandoned me. At least now I’m free, for the most part anyways. Sometimes I have to deal with the shit they left behind, but it’s a small price to pay in the grand scheme of things. I’m happy for the first time in a very long time.” She turns back to me, no tears to be seen this time. She’s honestly happy, and it’s all because of me.

“I know the kind of man Dennis was, Mallory. I can only assume what you’ve been through.” I take her hand in mine and tug us closer together until our knees are touching.

“I may have thoroughly checked you out before pursuing you romantically. I am an officer of the law, you know, and can’t be affiliated with any folk involved in nefarious things,” I grin and wink, and she returns with a smile of her own.

“Well, what an adorable invasion of privacy, Officer,” she quips.

Shrugging, “I had to make sure you weren’t crazy before asking you out.” She smacks me on the shoulder and I let out a hearty laugh. When was the last time I felt so carefree? She looks the same, free and unburdened, I love it.

“This place is beautiful. How did you find it? It’s in the middle of nowhere.” Her voice is a beautiful harmony that seeps in through my ears and sinks its claws into my grey matter. I’ll never be able to be without her.

“My patrol route runs through all of these backroads. I’m not always stuck on the highway with a radar gun.” She smiles at my quip and my heart flutters in my chest. My stomach feels like I just did the loop-de-loop on a rollercoaster. Is this what the "butterflies" feel like? I’ve heard of them but never had the nauseating pleasure of their company before.

“Is this where you bring all your dates?” She nudges my shoulder with hers. The apples of her cheeks redden under her intrusive question. Such a jealous little thing.

“Are you saying you’re my date?” I ignore her question just to rile her up a bit more.

“I don’t know what we are. What would you call me? If someone asked you who I was to you.” She’s genuinely curious, I can feel it.

“Mine,” I smile.

“What?” I love it when I shock her. The way her eyes widen and her mouth hangs open for just a moment. Never long enough for me to stick my cock in though. It’s mildly irritating.

“I’d call you mine. I don’t need a label on what we are. Unless you want that.” Her eyes drop to my mouth. Awe baby, do you want another kiss? Too bad. She swallows, I watch the way her throat works and remember it moving around my shaft. Fuck, why does everything about her turn me on? Mallory nods slightly and slowly, absorbing my words.

“Is that what you want, Mallory? Do you want to be my girlfriend?”