Chapter 19

I have no idea if leaving them at the cabin alone was a good or bad idea. Knox will probably have my ass if he finds out I did it, but what other option did I have? The cabin is safe, especially with the enhanced security we installed after Emma was taken by the Silent Death Mafia. The town is on high alert knowing that we're in town, so they will alert one of us if anyone concerning comes through.

The second I got in the car, my anxiety rose. I've done a good job keeping it shoved down, but just pulling up to the general store has left me worried. I'm probably overthinking it, I have to be overthinking it.

Fuck! This is what women do to you when you care and why I haven't wanted to let one into my life . I kept telling myself last night that I wouldn't let Illeana leave. She's mine and I won't ever give her up, but damnit how the hell am I supposed to function when she takes up every space in my head? I should have just brought the girls with me and risked someone seeing them. At least I would have been able to think and not be losing my damn mind, wondering what they are doing. Or maybe we should have just all stayed at the cabin; sure we'd run out of food but fuck it. I could have made Knox get someone to bring us some it would have been fine. Maybe.

Fuck! I'm going to have to talk to Illeana when I get back. She deserves better than me, better than someone who's losing their damn mind because I can't go without having her in my sights or near me. She deserves someone who can be gentle with her and give her everything that she wants in life.

This is exactly why I don't fuck women, especially one like Illeana. At least all the others before were good for just scratching an itch, not leaving me going crazy for not having her with me. She’s a drug and I'm addicted.

Reaching the outskirts of town, I slow down to the speed limit and make my way to the grocery store. Last time, the general store was easy enough, but with it only being me, the larger store would be safe to go in with the larger crowd. Pulling into the lot, I choose a spot near the back, putting the car into park. I check to make sure the grocery list I had Grace help me write this morning was still in my coat pocket. The plan is to surprise Illeana with her favorite meal. Which meant I needed to pack up all the ingredients for lasagna as well as a few other things.

By the time I finished shopping, I was already at my two-hour time mark. Which meant I needed to rush to get back. It took me an hour to get here alone in the snow; I figured it'd only take me thirty minutes to get everything, not an hour. Since when the hell did buying groceries take so long? I swear I made ten laps around the store trying to find the twenty things on my list. I also had to substitute a couple of items since I couldn't find the specific brand Grace wanted so hopefully everything still tastes right.

That little girl knows exactly how to get what she wants. Illeana may treat her like a little kid at times, but she's anything but that. I'm convinced she's going on thirty at this point. Hell, she gave me a whole-ass lecture this morning about not hurting Illeana, and I still have no damn idea how she even figured out that I liked her big sister. The kid is too smart for her own good. Exactly like Alexis. I can't wait to see what happens when and if those two girls ever meet each other.

God pray for us all.

"Have a great day!" the young cashier states as she reaches across the counter to hand me my receipt.

"You too," I answer automatically, grabbing my bags in both hands because I refuse to use the cart. I'm on a time crunch and don't want to have to walk the damn thing back to the entrance, and I refuse to be that person who leaves it in the middle of the parking lot for it to hit someone's car. Those people are inconsiderate assholes who deserve to get their ass beat. I mean how hard is it to take the damn cart back.

The second I step outside, I pause, regretting not zippering my jacket up and putting on my hat. A stupid snowstorm is rolling through. Just my damn luck. I swear the world is out to get me today. And just when I think it can't get any worse, my cellphone starts ringing in my pants pocket and I have no damn way to answer. Just fucking great.

The ringing phone makes me put my ass in gear, getting to the SUV as fast as I can. Everyone at work knows I'm on a detail, so they aren't going to call unless it's something important, which now has me worried. Thankfully, it's not the panic room alarm, so I know Illeana and Grace are still safe, but now I'm really regretting leaving them out of sight.

When I make it to the car, the phone stops ringing. By the time I get the back door open and put the groceries inside, the phone dings notifying me that whoever called left me a voicemail. How kind. Sliding my phone out of my pocket I check to see who the missed call is while I get into the driver's seat.

"Well fuck." Of course, Knox had to be the one calling. He better have a damn update. I wouldn't mind being at the cabin alone with Illeana, but under these circumstances, I'd rather that not be the case. She deserves to have her freedom and finish her classes.

"Why didn't you answer the damn phone?" Knox growls as soon as the line connects.

"Well damn, hello to you too. How's everything going, Steel? Oh, you know it's fine just trying to keep everyone safe, entertained, and fed. And no Illeana and I haven't killed each other yet but maybe check back later," I snark. The bastard wants to growl at me for not answering the phone the second he calls then two can play this game.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Smart Ass," Knox chuckles on the other line. "I didn't think you two would kill each other so I wasn't worried about that."

"Well thanks for the vote of confidence," I sigh. "What do you need? Do we have any news?"

"None yet. Senator Granger has been acting out of sorts. I've had Rome watching him and trailing, trying to find stuff out. He's had some blacked-out vehicles stopping by the house late at night. Tried to run the plates, but they came back to a shell company. Rome hasn't been able to get visuals on the subject or subjects in the cars," Knox explains while I start the engine, moving the phone from my ear to the Bluetooth in the car.

"So basically we still have nothing. How the fuck can we get no damn information? What is the Senator hiding from us?" My temper rises with every word I speak. This whole mission has been a clusterfuck since we took it on. I understand why Knox couldn't say no when Senator Granger asked, but that doesn't mean I approve of it. If the bastard would just share the damn information with us we could more effectively do our job.

"Are you in the car? What the fuck, Steel? Where the hell are the girls?" Knox shouts ignoring my comment. "You were supposed to be fucking watching them!"

"Are you done?" I ask calmly, tightening my hands on the steering wheel. I know I'm the carefree jokester most of the time, but I do actually give a shit about my job. I would never fucking risk the girls the way he is trying to insinuate.

"Am I done?! What the fuck?" Knox snarls. "I swear to god if you don't tell me that the girls are with you right now, I am going to drop everything and drive there to kick your ass. No, better yet, I'll call Shadow to send his guys to pick you up and beat you while I drive there."

"Don't you think you're being a touch dramatic?" I sigh, trying to hold my temper. "I would never risk the girls. You should know that. To answer one of your million questions, no the girls aren't with me, but before you lose your damn mind, they are safe at the cabin. I had to come get some groceries and I thought it would be safer for them to stay hidden than be seen in town. I showed Illeana where the safe room was and how to enter it. She knows the drill and is completely safe. Both she and Grace are. I can't believe you would seriously question me."

I hate that he is acting like he doesn't trust my judgment. I wouldn't ever risk them or my job. I'm not stupid. I chose the lesser of two evils, and trust me, I've hated not being at the cabin with them, but we needed some supplies, and I really wanted to make a special meal for Illeana. Sue me for trying to do something nice for her. If I thought there was any sort of risk to them staying behind, I wouldn't have left. Knox said it himself, though; we have no new updates, and we can't stay in the cabin forever. We'd probably make it one more week before needing to get out and find somewhere else to stay. The girls are already missing a week of school as it is, despite the fact I know they both have been getting homework done here and there throughout the week. This was supposed to be temporary. There hasn't even been chatter about the girls not being in school or at the Senator's house. They're fine alone for a couple of hours.

"Why didn't you just have me send someone to bring you supplies? Steel," Knox sighs. I'm sure he is shaking his head and pinching the bridge of his nose right now in stress. "Well, what's done is done. Nothing we can do about it now. Are you sure they haven't turned their phones on at all? We haven't had any news but that doesn't mean someone didn't track them if they went against the rules. I mean I don't see either of them doing that but we both know in our world you can never be too safe."

"Neither of them has used their phones that I know of. They both know the risks involved, or well Illeana does. We gave a shortened version to Grace, so as to not scare her. And as for the groceries, I didn't want to bother anyone. It wasn't a big deal to run out and grab them. You're panicking for no reason, Knox. Trust me. I got this. You're the one who assigned me this case because you said you were too busy. So trust me to do my job." I may have gotten a little snippy at the end there but I was getting annoyed. It was like everyone was against me here, which only made me more concerned over the fact that Illeana and I slept together. God, if Knox found out, he really would murder me, and have the Chaos Brotherhood hold me until he arrived to finish the job. We have a rule about sleeping with our clients, and I definitely broke it last night. Illeana may not be our client per se but she is who I'm tasked with protecting.

"And you're the one who didn't want a babysitting job. Sue me for questioning why you'd leave them behind. This case is too damn important and is going to have way too many eyes on all of us if we fuck up. We will probably lose a good chunk of clients if anything goes wrong," he retorts immediately, not even taking a second to think about what I said.

"Thanks for the vote of fucking confidence, Brother," I snarl, before hitting end on the call. I don't need to sit here and listen to him remind me about why this job is so important. He's my best friend, basically my brother, he should trust me on this. So fuck him. If he wants me to talk to him again then he needs to call me back and apologize. I'm not going to sit here letting him berate me as I drive in the middle of a goddamn snowstorm trying to get back to the cabin.

My phone pings with an incoming text, the screen of the SUV radio telling me it's from Knox. Of course, he sends a damn text instead of picking up the phone to say sorry. Asshole.

Hitting his name on the screen his text plays through the speakers of the car. "Yo Jerkface, when you're done throwing your hissy fit like a child call me back. You know I'm just stressed and worried. You know how to do your job. You're one of the best and I don't question you on that. I just don't like this shit with the Senator. He's being shady, even more so than before. I started doing some digging into him and the shit I've found isn't good. If I get any real leads I'll let you know. Just be on high alert. Call me immediately if you see anything suspicious."

"Why the fuck didn't you start with that, Asshole?" I snarl in the empty vehicle. I swear he makes shit complicated on purpose. If he had told me that before, I wouldn't have left the girls alone. If the Senator is into some shady shit then the girls would be in danger, even more than we've suspected with a stalker. Fuck!

Pressing my foot on the gas, I speed up to the point of concern. The roads are starting to get covered and slick, but I need to get back. This isn't my first time driving in a snowstorm like this and I doubt it will be my last. I know just how much this car can handle, and I have every intention of pushing it to the limit. I'm hoping to make it back to the cabin in less than an hour. I guess we will see if that happens or not. It damn well better. And after this, none of us are leaving without having a plan in place. This will be the last time I leave the girls alone, it also means no more trips out in the snow.