28. River

TWENTY-EIGHT

RIVER

Shit. I'd allowed myself to get carried away, which wasn't all that shocking considering I'd had the girl propped on the counter, her sweet little body tucked up close to mine.

Woman making me insane with the greed pounding through my veins. So out of my head with my desperation to have her that I'd let it slip my mind that Raven and Nolan would be right around the corner.

Should've given Raven a heads-up that Charleigh was going to be here when she arrived, but I hadn't had the fortitude to think it through.

I was too fucking wrapped in the need to hold her. Protect her. Please her.

So, there I stood with my cock straining so fucking hard I thought I might pass out while my sister stared daggers at me like I'd stolen her favorite plaything.

Considering she'd chosen Charleigh as her best friend, I was pretty sure she was worried that I had. That I was going to do something stupid and fuck it up.

No question, I would.

Made it worse that she'd asked me to leave her friend alone if I didn't plan on actually pursuing something real with her, warning me that Charleigh had been hurt enough and she didn't need me adding to that.

And fuck. It was the last thing I wanted. To hurt Charleigh more.

Raven cleared her throat, shucking off the surprise as she waltzed the rest of the way into the kitchen. "Well, I'm glad to find you here, Charleigh, you know, since I waited for you at the shop and then texted you to let you know I needed to leave and then I didn't hear from you. I was getting worried."

She sent me another cutting glance.

Yeah, I was in trouble with my baby sister.

"I'm sorry. I didn't even check my phone." Charleigh patted her pockets while she looked around like she'd misplaced it, her attention landing on the purse that rested on the island right next to where I'd had her propped.

Redness heated her cheeks. No doubt, she was instantly picturing me having her there.

"It's fine. I really was worried for a minute, but it looks to me like things are handled."

Another searching glance my way as my sister set the two shopping bags she'd carried in onto the counter. "So, what are you doing here?"

"Did you come over for dinner?" Nolan shouted it right behind Raven's question, the kid completely missing the implications swirling through the room.

"I was going to?—"

"Yeah, she is staying for dinner, Nolan. So why don't you guys hang out for a bit, and I'm going to do a quick errand, then I'll bring dinner back. How's that sound?"

"It sounds like you've got a smart plan, Daddy-O."

Nah, was probably the biggest fool who lived with the things I was planning to do, but I knew I'd do whatever it took to give Charleigh the life she deserved.

The one she was begging for.

Uncertainty pulled through Charleigh's expression, and I knew if we were in private, she would demand to know where I was going. I reached out and touched her hand, the girl the flame that licked through my senses.

"Gotta handle something. I'll be back soon. Chill with my sister and Nolan."

"Yeah, you should probably go. It seems Charleigh and I need to catch up." Raven pulled a bottle of wine from a reusable bag and waved it in the air. Unquestionably, Charleigh was about to get the third degree.

But what Charleigh wanted to divulge to her was between them, and I didn't want to stand in the middle of it.

A small smile tweaked Charleigh's mouth, and she whispered, "I could definitely use one of those."

"Good." I started across the kitchen, ruffling my fingers through Nolan's hair and tilting my head at Raven's questioning expression as I passed.

"I'm going to set the alarm to stay ," I told her, which wasn't exactly that rare since I always wanted them to have extra protection whenever I was away, but I could see it only conjured more questions.

"Okay," she said.

I dipped out into the garage, opting to take my SUV. The second I pulled out of the driveway, I reached out to the screen and pushed the button to dial Otto's number.

Knew he was going to be in a stir over what had happened.

It took all of one ring for him to answer. "You want to tell me what the fuck that was about?"

His voice was hard as it filtered through the speakers. Blowing out a sigh, I came up to the stop sign at Vista View, attention darting both ways to make sure it was clear before I made the left and headed in the direction of town.

"Charleigh thought someone was following her." The words were gravel, aggression coming back on the second I addressed it.

"Yeah, it was clear she was freaking the fuck out. Suffering a full-blown panic attack. Thing I want to know about is why it sent you bolting out the door like a beast ready to tear someone limb from limb right out in the light of day and with an audience. Looked to me a whole lot like you already knew she was in trouble. Want to tell me why that is?"

Otto was always as cool as they came. He wasn't acting so cool right then.

A harsh sigh raked from my lungs, and my hands clenched down on the steering wheel as I fought the wave of violence that threatened to suck me under. "When I went after her that Saturday night a couple weeks ago?"

"Yeah?"

Roughing a palm over my face, I let go of a heavy expulsion of air. "It wasn't because I was lookin' to get my dick sucked like the rest of you assholes were implying. Followed her because I could tell that something had her spooked."

Okay, it was only partially a lie. Because I wanted that girl's mouth wrapped around my cock almost as badly as I wanted to sink it into her pussy. Wanted it as badly as I wanted to go on a rampage to hunt down whoever was causing her this threat.

Wanted it more than I'd probably wanted anything in my life, which was so fuckin' twisted I knew I was teetering on a quickly crumbling cliff.

No chance was I letting that on to Otto.

"She'd frozen right in the middle of a spin out on the dance floor," I continued. "Like she'd run smack into a ghost. Then she'd panicked and taken off. Think you and I have seen that kind of fear enough times to know what it means, so I followed her home."

"Ah, shit," Otto muttered. Dude was instantly on guard, ready to step in. I knew he'd be. The whole crew would be.

But Otto and I both knew this was different.

She was here.

Friends with Raven.

And the girl had come running to me, not because she thought I was some obscure, faceless lifeline, but because she'd known she'd be safe in my arms.

And that was exactly where I wanted to keep her.

"I have no idea who it is, but I know enough to know she's afraid of someone. Apparently, she'd gotten the same sense she might be being followed earlier today, and that's when she came into the shop."

"Came into the shop? That's putting it mildly, River. That girl was in straight-up distress."

I sighed. "Know it."

"And?"

I didn't hesitate when I said, "And I took her back to my place."

Disbelief gusted out of him, and his tone lowered in concern. "You took her back to your place and not to the motel?"

It was against protocol. So against it, I deserved to get my ass beat. But there'd been no stopping myself from making that choice. Knowing there'd be no letting her out of my sight until I knew she was safe behind the walls of my house.

"You know I can't just roll up there without a plan," I defended.

"Oh, I think you had a plan, River, and I'm pretty sure that plan was to get that sweet little thing all to yourself."

"Like you don't go around getting attached." My words were barbs.

He scoffed. "I get attached because I'm worried about them. Because I care. Because I want to be sure they get on with their lives and they have the resources to do it. I still follow the rules and I follow them to a T, and I've never once dipped my dick in any of them."

"She came to me, not to Sanctum." I flexed my hand with the stacked Ss tattooed on the back.

Sovereign Sanctum.

My gut twisted. The rules were there for a reason, and I was the one who'd written them.

"Sounds to me like you're making excuses," he said.

Maybe, but they were still valid.

"She doesn't know anything about us. Who we are. Besides, I don't know what she's up against."

"And you've taken it upon yourself to find out?" It was a partial accusation.

"Yeah, you could say that."

On the other end of the line, I could feel Otto warring, unsure of what to say. Finally, he exhaled and muttered, "Just be careful, man. You know what we have riding on this. You start straying from the purpose, and the waters get muddied. It puts all of us in a precarious situation."

"Know it. I am being careful."

Nah, I was being fuckin' reckless, but I couldn't admit that.

"So what's your plan?"

"Going to call Cash. See what he can dig out."

"Without her knowing?"

"She's not ready to give me details, but I need to be prepared."

"Fuck, River, you're in deep, aren't you?"

I didn't try to fuckin' deny that one.

"Fuck," he wheezed before he continued with a sigh. "You have that job, man. Next week."

A boulder formed in the middle of my chest.

It was an extraction. We'd tried the normal avenues with her, trying to get her to safety without it getting messy, but her plans to leave had been uncovered by her piece of shit husband.

Now, there'd be no avoiding the mess . These jobs were the most dangerous. Ones where any number of things could go wrong. Ones where my special skills were often required.

"I'll be ready," I told him.

"Good."

It wasn't good , but we did it because it was right. No matter the consequence. No matter the price. I'd become a monster if it gave someone else a better life.

My ribs clamped around my heart as I thought about the woman who was back at my place. Wondering what treacherous shores she was battering against. If it was possible I could protect her from them, all while wondering if who I really should be protecting her from was me.

Silence traveled between us before he finally said, "You know, I've never seen you this way before."

It was both curious and a clear insinuation.

I shouldn't even honor him with a response, but I was taking his bait, anyway. "Seen me like what?"

"Smitten. "

A scoff jumped right out of me. "Smitten? Believe me, brother, guys like me don't get smitten ."

"Well, I guess some people call it obsessed."

Irritation blazed through my system. "I'm not fuckin' obsessed."

He laughed hard. "Call it what you want, man, but I saw it written all over you this afternoon. Girl's got you."

My chest tightened. "That's bullshit, and you know it."

"Is it?"

"Just leave it, man," I warned him.

We both knew the rule.

We could fuck and play, but we could never make attachments. Could never get too close or allow anyone to really know who we were.

We had to go this life alone because we couldn't afford to have someone relying on us. Couldn't afford to take them down the precarious path we'd chosen.

Most of all, we could never risk being exposed.

Raven had already been my responsibility…and well, Nolan? He'd come into my life wholly unexpected, and he was the one exception I could ever make.

"Just wonderin' if it might be time to change up the rules a bit is all," Otto said, his musing taking on a benevolent tone.

Guilt constricted, knowing the line I'd already crossed by bringing Charleigh to my place. I scrubbed a palm over my face as I made it back into the main area of town.

"You know we can't do that."

"But how long can we really go on living this way?" he asked, a bit of longing filling the words.

The truth that we'd been living thin, even though we'd promised that having each other's backs would be enough. This mismatched family that had been forged through the flames. Through desperation and treachery.

Just a handful of fucked up kids living on the street who'd come to rely on each other to survive. And once we'd become members of Trent's MC, Iron Owls, we'd taken it full fledge.

Out of it, we'd discovered the one thing we had to offer this world.

"Don't know," I told him honestly.

"Do you ever wonder what would happen if we made this thing legit?"

Surprise jolted through me, disbelief at what he'd implied.

We'd started this thing crooked because that's what we'd been, and we kept it that way because we were a whole shit-ton more effective without having laws and chains and parameters to hold us back.

Thing was, it also made us criminals, and he and I both knew there was no going back.

"Maybe you need a break." I struggled to keep the dread out, the way my pulse had gone offbeat at the implication.

Otto sighed. "Nah, man, I'm just rambling. No need to worry."

A frown pulled at my brow. "You sure you're good?"

"Yeah."

"All right then. Take care, brother."

"Yeah, you, too."

The line went dead just as I was making the turn into the parking lot at the side of the building where Moonflower and Charleigh's apartment were housed. I pulled into a spot, looking up at the white bricks, wondering what the fuck I thought I was doing.

Did it anyway, though, because I couldn't sit back and be complacent, and I dialed Cash's number.

He answered on the second ring. "What's up, brother?"

"Need you to dig something out for me."

"Yeah?"

"Need all the information you can get me on Charleigh Lowe."