51. Valerie

Chapter fifty-one

Valerie

T here's a blue haze in the sky and I know sunrise is going to follow behind it soon, warming up the sky but right now, everything is perfectly quiet aside from the waves crashing in the distance.

Antonio is exactly where I expect him to be, sitting in the sand watching the waves rolling in and out. I sit down beside him, he doesn't look over at me and I don't expect him to either. We both sit in silence staring at the water.

"Is this how you felt?" He speaks first and I look over at him. "Is this how you felt for all those years when Ambrose was clueless about your crush on him?"

I sigh and face the water again. "I don't think it's quite the same situation, Nino."

"How not? It started as a childhood crush and you were just lucky it materialised into something more, I'm not as lucky per se."

"I'm sorry Antonio," I whisper.

"Do you love him?" I can feel his eyes on me and the stare feels heavy, heavier than the question itself.

I meet his stare. "I do. I really do, and I love you too, Nino…" I trail off not wanting to say it but he nods .

"But not in the same way," he finishes for me. "I understand, Val."

"Nino, you are one of the most important people in my life. I can't lose you. I never meant to hurt you like this, we both didn't mean to. There was just never a good time to tell you." I sigh and drop my head to my knees that are drawn up to my chest.

"I don't suppose there is ever a good time to say something like that. How long has it been going on?"

"I think somewhere around the CFP dinner." Fuck to say it aloud and realise how long I've been keeping this from him. It's been months, long before anything even happened with Ambrose. I had so many opportunities to tell him.

"I wanted to tell you as soon as I started feeling something for him, but then you called and warned me to stay away so I knew you wouldn't approve."

"Val I'm your fucking best friend, I don't approve of half the shit you do but that's never stopped you from telling me anything before."

"This was different, how was I supposed to tell you ‘I think I'm in love with your older brother'?" I stare at him slightly annoyed.

"The same way you did our entire childhood," he shrugs.

"Those times were different Nino, this time was real."

He stares at me and sighs. "I guess I'm just scared."

"Scared of what?"

He turns to face the water. "Scared we won't be as close anymore."

I scoff. "That's never going to happen. Now that I'm not hiding anything anymore I won't be avoiding you any longer ." I bite my lip and he chuckles.

I bump my shoulder into his. "I really am sorry I lied to you."

"It's okay, I probably would've done the same if I was in your position."

"Ah." I hit his shoulder. "You're supposed to at least lie and say you'd never do that to me. "

"We both know I'm a horrible liar, especially when you know my tell," he smiles at me and I see a glimpse of my best friend again for the first time in what feels like months.

A loud bang slices through the air and we both jump. "Get down!" Antonio whispers and grabs my arm. Then suddenly he's dragging me, crouched down, towards the house.

Another two loud bangs sound and it's only then when I realise what they are.

Gunshots.

"What the fuck is going on?" I whisper.

"Valerie will you hurry the fuck up, we can chit-chat in a second." He pulls me even faster towards the house.

"Go towards the library." He instructs as he closes the back door and locks it.

Instead of asking another question, I do as I'm told and rush towards the small room under the stairs. It's probably the only room I haven't been in since it's been reserved strictly for Luciano and well, since he's no longer here no one has any real use for it.

Antonio walks in a few minutes later, phone up to his ear. "They're somewhere nearby, at least two snipers."

He closes the door before typing in a code and an electric lock sounds.

"Yes, I've got her into the library now, I'll call mamá and tell her to stay at Uncle Luca's, not that she needs to be told. Okay, bye."

"Who was that?"

‘'Ambrose,'' he whispers before relaying the information to his mom who seems all too relaxed with what is going on right now.

"Antonio." I finally get his full attention. "What the fuck is going on?"

"Those were some of Mattheo's, uhm associates."

My brows furrow. "Stop speaking to me like I'm twelve, what is going on? "

"I'm not sure if you know but Mattheo was involved in a lot of illegal shit. Adriano found out after he did some digging on Horatio after our one meeting," he explains.

"Why did Adriano even think to do a search on Horatio?"

"Said he had a bad feeling about him and if anything, we've learnt to trust Adriano's gut. It's always right. Anyway, that's why we had all that security. It's also why we had weapons in case anything went wrong. None of us knew about you being married to him though."

I want to cry all over again. "He made sure to not keep any records of our relationship public because he was worried someone might 'come after me.'" I laugh. The irony of the way he kept our entire relationship a secret from the world, went so far as to have other women hold up the facade, and then still hunted me down like a psycho.

The beeping of the keypad draws our attention to the door. "Here's your boyfriend now," Antonio says and sure enough Ambrose and Gus come rushing in.

"Are you both okay?" Ambrose asks, looking between us both, Antonio simply nods. Seconds later Ambrose has me in his arms. "Thank you," I hear him whisper to who I assume is Antonio.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" He pulls back to give me a once-over.

"Yes, I'm fine, just shaken up, Nino got us inside in time."

"I'm glad he did," he brushes my hair out of my face and kisses the top of my head.

"The security says the perimeter is clear and if anyone was here they're gone now," Gus says hanging up the call. "Adriano's tech guy also located Horatio's phone, looks like he's in Spain for now."

"Make sure they don't move from their posts unless they're dying," Ambrose says.

"Yes, Papá I'm sure I'm okay," I say into the phone as I sit on Ambrose's bed.

"Is Ambrose there? I saw the news, Valerie. I want to be sure you're okay and not alone." His voice is threaded with concern and I frown knowing how much stress this has probably caused him.

"Yes, Ambrose is here, Papá, please don't worry I promise I'm okay."

He sighs so loudly I can hear it through the call. "Okay Fiore Mio , have Ambrose call me in the morning."

"Will do, Papá, I love you."

"Ti amo, Fiore Mio ." I love you, Fiore Mio.

Ambrose stumbles out of the shower, his towel hanging low and usually his body screams sex but right now it's whispering pain. The purple bruises that line his ribs paint a dark picture of how heavy this day has been on all of us.

I walk up behind him and wrap my arms around his waist, placing a small kiss on his back. He tenses under my touch but softens again under the kiss. "I'm gonna take a quick shower too."

"You could have joined me, you know." It isn't an innuendo or an excuse to see me naked like it usually is, instead it genuinely sounds like a caring offer.

"I wanted to give you time alone to think," I say, immediately wondering if I shouldn't have done that.

"Thank you," he grabs my hand and kisses it.

The shower does nothing but rinse off the physical dirt of the day. The emotional dirt lingers long after I've dried off.

Antonio killed someone today and I worry about what happens now. Will the police get involved when this gets out to the media? I push the worry to the back of my head when I get out of the bathroom and hear Ambrose on the phone with someone.

Thank you, we'll come and visit this evening," he says before hanging up .

"That was the hospital," he says as I sit next to him. He pulls me into his lap. "They said he's in a lot of pain but he's awake and out of surgery."

"That's great, not that he's in pain but that he's awake," I say.

"They don't know the full extent of the damage to his shoulder but with physical therapy, they're hopeful he'll regain full mobility of it." He swallows and I hear us both sigh in relief. "I was so worried I was going to lose both of you today. I've never felt that useless and scared before in my life." He admits.

"But you didn't. We live to see another day." I smile up at him.

He looks down at my hand that's rubbing small circles into his forearm. "Why do you do that?"

I hadn't realised that I'd been doing it. "My mamá would always do it whenever I felt anxious and it always helped, I guess it's something I picked up from her."

"It works, well the few times you have done it, it's worked."

She would've been glad to know." I chuckle and he just stares at me. "What?"

"I love you. I love you with all of my fucked up, piece of shit heart, and I'm so lucky to have you."

"I love you, too." I reach up and I kiss him. I kiss him like it's the last time I might ever be able to. Those words linger in the air and I know in my bones that he means it with every fibre in his body and I mean it with every fibre in mine.

The End.