16. Lorin

Chapter sixteen

Lorin

" O kay, I think this is all you'll need for this one," Glenn said, putting the last of the ingredients from his bag onto the table in Lorin's magic room.

It was surreal that he was starting to think of it as his instead of his mother's, but he couldn't deny it. It did belong to him, and he had every intention of utilizing it now that he knew where his path was leading. Well, maybe ‘knew' was a bit too strong of a word. He had a vague little sprout of an idea. Better than nothing, though.

"Thank you, Glenn," Lorin said, making the other man beam and nod at him enthusiastically. It jostled Forrest, who was snuggled up in a fur-lined pouch at his side.

"So…a pathfinder?" Glenn asked.

Lorin shrugged uncomfortably. It still hadn't fully sunk in, the impostor syndrome sneaking up at all hours. "Looks like, yeah."

"One of the callings you actually can turn into a full-time job," Glenn said, winking at Lorin. "Thought about that?"

"No, not yet." Lorin shrugged because he hadn't had the time to actually think about anything other than Kit.

"But you're staying here?"

"I am, yes," he said, thinking back to all the emails he'd sent while they'd waited for Glenn to get them what they needed.

He'd finally decided. He'd uprooted his life for a leap into the unknown. And yet, it didn't feel like a mistake at all as soon as he hit the send button. It felt right.

"I resigned from my old job and notified my old landlord. Hired a moving company."

Glenn bounced on the balls of his feet a little bit. "That's the best news I've had in a long while. I have so many questions!"

"And the answers to those will have to wait for a while," Lorin's grandmother said as she walked into the magic room, Kit hot on her heels and Sjena flying in shortly after to settle on a cabinet.

Kit padded over to Lorin and wound around his ankles, the scent coming off his fur throwing Lorin completely off balance. He usually smelled earthy and rich, very dedicated to his grooming and making sure his fur was always fluffed and pristine looking. Now it was slightly matted with whatever his grandma had put on him.

"What is that?" Lorin asked, and she handed him a vial of a transparent liquid.

"Just the oils of a few protective herbs," she said. "From what you read about the ritual, it shouldn't interfere with how it works. I do believe you want to do everything you can to keep Kit protected during?"

"Yes!" Lorin said. "Yes, of course."

"Hopefully that will help." She moved to stand next to the table, observing the items laid out on it. "Interesting."

"I haven't had a reason to try and get one of those in years," Glenn said.

"How did you even manage it?" his grandma asked.

Glenn winked at her. "I can't reveal my sources, but let's just say it wasn't easy and you were lucky I was owed a favor by someone."

"Must have been a huge favor," she said, and Lorin followed her gaze to a small transparent container holding several misshapen blobs of what looked like amber. Styrax benzoin resin. The key ingredient in unlocking the potential of a shapeshift.

Used as incense, benzoin brought two different worlds together. It cleared paths between them and made crossing from one side to the other easier and free of obstacles. Coupled with rosemary for spiritual cleansing, it made the shift as painless and easy as it could get.

Lorin hoped it would work.

He turned his gaze to the two small pentagrams drawn on the floor with the rest of the ingredients the ritual called for arranged neatly inside of them. He swallowed down bile at the sight of animal bones set in the middle of one, to ground the animal, Kit, during the shift. He didn't even want to look at the other pentagram, the one holding a human bone, to provide the animal spirit a vessel to occupy while in human form.

His grandma hadn't told him where it had come from, and he absolutely didn't want to go anywhere near it. It was a testament to the magnitude of his feelings for Kit that he was willing to even entertain the idea of trying something like this. Let alone be the one to perform it.

Lorin crouched down to Kit's level and extended his arms, letting the fox hop into his lap and nuzzle close. He wanted to pretend it was to reassure Kit, but they both knew Lorin needed the reassurance more than anyone else did.

"Remember what I promised you last night?" Lorin asked, and Kit bumped their noses together in confirmation. "I stand by it. I'll do everything in my power to make sure you're safe. But if at any point you feel like we need to stop, you let me know in whatever way you're able to. Give me a sign and it all stops. You're what matters here."

Kit stared into his eyes and Lorin allowed the contact to go on for as long as it needed to, hoping he was conveying everything he was feeling at that moment.

Worry for Kit's safety.

Hope that he might have him back.

Joy at the prospect of getting to see the human him again.

Desperation for the ritual to work the way he hoped it would.

Kit turned his head and nipped at Lorin's fingers gently before wiggling out of his hold and bounding over to the table. He looked up at it, then back at Lorin as if to say ‘go on, I'm ready.'

Lorin stood up and looked at his grandmother, who gave him a short nod in support. He knew having her around would help. Just knowing she was there, with all the power wrapped around her and her years of experience, made him feel like there was a safety net in the middle of the chasm he was about to walk over.

"You have everything you need," she said.

"I do." He put his hand on a small, empty notebook with a pen attached to it that he had laid at the edge of the table.

If the ritual worked and the human Kit appeared, Lorin needed to be able to communicate with him. They needed something to give them direction.

"Whenever you're ready then," his grandma said.

He looked down at Kit once more. The fox yipped at him softly, as if giving him that final push, and Lorin realized he didn't have any reason to stall anymore.

It needed to be done.

"Okay," he said to Kit. "You know where you need to be."

Kit nosed at Lorin's calf before hopping into the first pentagram, perching in the middle of it, his paw placed on the bone set there.

Lorin felt his stomach turn and he was glad he didn't have to be the human vessel for Kit, because that would have meant touching the human bone on the other end. Absolutely not.

He took several benzoin resin pebbles and walked over, sitting down in between the two pentagrams, making sure he wasn't touching either one. He placed the benzoin resin in a neat line leading from the edge of one pentagram to the other, creating a little path.

"Last chance to back out," he said, looking around the room, and when nobody gave any sign of wanting to stop he pulled out a pack of matches and took one out.

With a quick flick of his wrist he lit the match and brought it down to the first benzoin pebble. The one closest to Kit. One final look at his familiar, and Lorin allowed the match to touch the resin, setting it on fire.

It was a flame unlike any other Lorin had seen. It looked like a child had drawn a candlelight—sharply defined and perfectly tear-shaped, bright orange in the middle and paler toward the edges. It grew in size and tilted to the side. Like a finger, reaching over to the next pebble.

Lorin took a steadying breath and whispered the incantation when the flame touched the second pebble, setting it on fire.

This flame was larger, just as sharp and defined as the first one, but bigger. The warmth of it could be felt around it if you were sitting close enough. And Lorin was. He could feel it touching the skin of his hands, warming them up.

He looked at Kit before the third flame could be lit. He still looked the same, but the flames reflected in his gorgeous eyes made him seem more…otherworldly than before. Like he was slowly stopping being a part of Lorin's realm. Like something distant was taking over.

The third flame ignited.

Lorin repeated the incantation. Louder this time.

Kit shivered inside the pentagram. The third flame brought a scent with it, sharp and not entirely pleasant. Powerful like the plant the resin was collected from. Mysterious like the substance itself.

It reached over to the fourth pebble and lit it on fire.

Lorin chanted once more, his voice growing steadier, surer. The human bone in the second pentagram gave off a faint glow, but Lorin didn't want to focus on that at all.

One last pebble.

One last chant.

He poured his all into it. Reached deep and convinced himself he was powerful enough to pull it off. A good enough witch to perform a ritual that had been lost for decades. He had to believe he could. He had to trust that the magic knew better than he did. It wouldn't have allowed itself to be seen by him if it didn't think him worthy.

He had no choice. He had to believe he was truly the witch he was destined to be.

The final pebble burned. The room lit up around them.

A spiritual pathway formed between the two pentagrams. Like a guide. A roadmap for Kit to follow.

Lorin looked at his familiar and caught the flicker of movement under his skin. Noticed the gentle flex of Kit's muscles and the subtle groan he let out when his body started changing. Expanding.

The fur pulled back in. His paws extended into legs and arms. His face lost the fox features and gave way to the beautiful young man Lorin had the privilege to call his own.

Kit was there. His mate. His human. His familiar.

"Hi," he breathed out, staring into Kit's eyes, mesmerized by their beauty once more.

Kit opened his mouth to speak, and this time a tiny little croak managed to escape.

"H—" He clasped his palm over his throat after that, face contorted in pain. Lorin jumped to his feet and rushed to the table, grabbing the notebook and the pencil and bringing them both down.

Kit couldn't leave the pentagram during the ritual.

"I thought he was supposed to…" Glenn started, pointing at something, but was interrupted by Lorin's grandmother.

"Shhhh." She whacked him on the back of his head with her staff. "Give them a moment."

"Don't strain yourself," Lorin said, placing the notebook inside the pentagram Kit was in and leaving it on the floor. They wouldn't be able to touch each other.

It was proving to be a much harder condition to uphold than Lorin had predicted. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold Kit. Have him pressed close and reassure himself he wasn't harmed.

"Are you okay?" Lorin asked instead, and Kit picked up the notebook and the pencil with shaky hands, opening it to the first blank page and scribbling something before showing it to Lorin.

I'm good, it said in lopsided, wobbly handwriting.

"Any pain? Any indication that the ritual hurt you in any way?" Lorin pressed on.

Kit took a moment to assess himself before writing again, this time a slightly longer message. I don't think the ritual worked as planned.

Lorin read the message out loud, frowning when the words sank in.

"But…you're here, and you're human," he said. "And I definitely felt the magic wake up. And…"

He raised his hand, examining his marks. He found two very small new runes on his fingers and nails. One was just a tiny arrow pointing upward, and the other was a line with two little triangles on top of it. "These are definitely new."

"Magic doesn't ask for perfection, Lorin," his grandma said. "Just because a ritual didn't work, doesn't mean the magic wasn't used. Your marks will show up with each significant use of your powers, regardless of the success."

"So it didn't work?" Lorin looked over at the empty pentagram with the human bone in it.

Kit was supposed to be there. He was supposed to be projected as a human into the other pentagram. In his excitement and joy at seeing him, Lorin had completely forgotten about that.

He ran a hand over his face and rubbed his eyes. He didn't think he'd messed anything up with the ritual. His grandma had gone over it with him a dozen times. They'd triple-checked everything from the drawings of the pentagrams to the pronunciation of the incantation.

A hand touched his shoulder and he opened his eyes to find Kit standing face to face with him, pale fingers wrapped around Lorin's wrist.

"You can't be out…" Lorin said, pushing Kit back toward the pentagram.

"He's already out," his grandma said. "And if the ritual failed, leaving the pentagram won't mean a thing."

"But how are you human if it failed?" Lorin asked.

Kit shrugged, shaking his head. He reached back and grabbed the notebook, scribbling something quickly before handing it to Lorin.

The shift just felt like it always does .

"So you shifted on your own?" Lorin asked.

Kit tilted his head as if deep in thought for a second before shaking his head again. I don't think so. It felt like something was helping me along. But not the ritual.

"I don't understand," Lorin said after reading the words and looking up into Kit's eyes again. Kit gave him another tiny shrug and a soft smile and Lorin just wanted to keep it forever. "How long do we have?"

I don't know , Kit wrote, the tilt of his words a little melancholy.

"Hopefully long enough to check him over," his grandma said, shuffling closer with her staff. "Grab that basket for me, Glenn. Don't just stand there gawking."

Glenn hopped to it with an easy gait, not at all bothered by Grandma's cantankerous attitude. Maybe he was as used to it as everyone else around town.

"I recognize a well-being spell when I see it," Glenn said, nosing through the stuff without shame as he walked it over.

Grandma grunted. "They're not foolproof, and it's better to go to a physician or a trained spell healer, but we need to keep this quiet for now. Understand?"

Glenn rolled his eyes. "You've sworn me to secrecy already. I remember. Don't let the fox out of the bag, yada, yada." He dodged a swat from Lorin's grandma with a laugh.

"This will show anything majorly wrong," she said, taking the basket. "Lorin, prep Kit so he knows what to expect. We went through it."

Lorin nodded, grasping Kit's hand gently. Kit tilted his head and blinked his bright amber eyes at him, oh so trusting. "Grandma is going to cast a spell to check you over. She'll draw symbols on the seven tunnels of your body in order to try and find what might be wrong."

Kit cupped his throat and Lorin nodded. "Yes. Hopefully it'll give us some kind of understanding of what to do to help you. Is that okay?"

Kit nodded his consent and Lorin helped him over to his grandma, who was crushing things with a mortar and pestle so they could begin.

Her hands were steady as they took to Kit's skin, the paste she was drawing with thick and green. She moved from the base of his spine to his abdomen, over his solar plexus and heart. Next was his throat, and Kit swallowed heavily as she worked, his fingers twitching a little. Lorin squeezed the one he was holding tighter, trying to pour comfort into him.

She finished up with the marks over his brow and the crown of his head, the green coloring his white hair starkly at the root.

"Let go, Lorin. It's time," she said.

Lorin pulled a face but did as he was told, letting go and stepping back. He watched as his grandma clutched her staff and began to chant. She did it in mutters, so it was hard to make out the exact words she was using, but the glow of Kit's body told everyone it was working.

At once Lorin began to see red pulsing over Kit's throat, like a beating heart, and his grandma increased the speed of her incantations.

Kit winced, but he stood firm with his eyes closed until the incantation died down, the glow fading with it.

Lorin hadn't realized how fast his heart was beating until his grandma stopped and it was the only thing he could hear drumming in his ears.

"Grandma?"

She clutched her staff tightly, letting it take some of her weight as she rested after the spell. Sjena cawed. It must have taken something out of her too. "I was hoping something might be illuminated about the spell that was cast upon him, but there's no trace I could find."

She looked sort of pissed about that and Lorin commiserated. This unknown spell was driving him up the wall as well. "And Kit himself?"

"Is surprisingly healthy for being shift locked, but the throat is damaged. The vocal cords specifically. There is inflammation and weakness in the muscles."

"Is it serious?" Lorin asked.

Kit shifted next to him, cupping his throat again anxiously.

Grandma shook her head. "That he was able to vocalize even a little earlier is a positive sign, but I couldn't begin to guess. I'm not trained."

"I have some herbal recipes I've collected over the years to help with things like that," Glenn said, and both Lorin and Kit looked at him with hopeful eyes. "I can't guarantee it will cure anything, but it'll definitely make things more comfortable for you, Kit. You'll most likely be able to substitute a lot from your stores, Lorin."

"Thank you," Lorin said, and he saw Kit smile as well.

Glenn waved them off with a smile. "Buy me a coffee in town someday and actually stay to chat and we're even. I'll write the recipes down then get out of your hair."

Lorin nodded, watching him go with a slight frown. Lorin couldn't believe he'd kind of made a friend here. Or at least, what he thought one should be like. Someone who would offer to help just because. Who didn't look at him with any preconceived ideas. Who wanted coffee and Lorin's company for payment.

The idea of meeting up was…nice.

A revelation.

He was shaken out of his musing as Kit shuffled closer to him and grasped his arm, looking for attention like he did in his fox form. He didn't have to try hard. Ninety percent of Lorin's time since they'd met had been spent thinking about him in one form or another.

And with Kit human right now, he didn't want to waste it.

Lorin turned to his grandma a little awkwardly and she snorted. "I'll give you two some time alone. We'll decide on the next steps tomorrow once we've had time to regroup. At least try to get some useful information though, Lorin."

Sjena flew to her shoulder and she shuffled away with that thinly veiled insinuation. It made his cheeks and ears burn hot, the wooden stairs creaking with her steps before they fell silent.

Lorin turned toward the still burning benzoin resin and snuffed it with a wave of his hand. The flames whispered into embers before fizzling out completely, and Kit remained by his side, still human.

"Hello," he repeated, a little dumbly.

Kit grinned with all his teeth, then shivered.

Lorin realized he was completely naked still, and despite the heaters running, it was winter.

Lorin fought his blush in favor of worry.

He grabbed the nearest blanket to wrap around Kit and adjusted it across his chest. When he glanced up, Kit was already staring intently at him, his hooded gaze fixed.

Stars, those eyes…

Lorin licked his lips. "Do you want to shower? You're all green."

He didn't really want to let Kit out of his sight. Or his arms. He had no idea how long they had together, and he didn't want to waste a single second of that time.

Kit shook his head, cuddling closer, tucking himself tighter inside the blanket and Lorin's arms. He reached out for the notebook and wrote, before showing it to Lorin.

I don't want to be away from you , it said, and Lorin felt his heart stutter in response.

Kit

Kit hadn't thought life could get much better than being swaddled in warmth and his mate's arms. Somehow, the fact that Lorin's ritual had failed, that they still had zero idea why it failed, and they still had no clue how to help Kit take back control of his shift was a distant problem in Kit's mind. Kit allowed himself the luxury of being present in the moment, where Lorin smelled so good and his fingers in Kit's hair felt like magic.

Disappointment and stress could wait until he shifted back again. He didn't want to waste this precious time when he didn't know when it would be taken from him again. History said that would be sooner than either of them wanted.

He purred. Or tried to. The sound started in his chest, but his throat protested. Loudly.

He flinched, the sound cutting off into a pained squeak.

"Don't hurt yourself," Lorin whispered into his hair, tightening his hold on Kit's body.

Kit shook his head and nuzzled closer, but his throat was still spasming from being irritated and he was hard-pressed to suppress the small coughs.

Lorin pulled his head back to look down at him, brow furrowed deeply. "We should make that recipe Glenn left while you're still human. We don't know how much time we'll have."

Kit pouted as Lorin let him go and moved to the note on the small table covered in pots. Kit trailed his steps like he did when he was a fox, going up on the balls of his feet to try and peer over Lorin's shoulder. His balance still wasn't the best in this form, however, so he stumbled forward, catching himself on Lorin's back.

Lorin looked back at him with a small smile, his eyes flicking over his features before the smile dropped. "I'm sorry I'm not figuring this out faster."

Kit blinked before grabbing the notebook and writing, The recipe?

"Your shift." Lorin sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. A few strands stayed upright like sprouts. Kit wanted to bat at them. "Apparently I'm not that great at my so-called calling."

Lorin was often self-deprecating. He didn't have a lot of confidence in his own abilities and often took to overthinking a lot. Kit could think of nothing else to do but reach out and pinch Lorin's lips together.

Lorin's eyes widened and he tried to mumble, but Kit shook his head firmly. He released Lorin's lips and wrote, It's not your fault. You're doing everything you can and I appreciate it.

He shoved the page under Lorin's nose, making him go cross-eyed as he tried to read it.

"It doesn't seem like it's enough," Lorin said.

The fact that you care this much is more than enough.

"Of course I care," Lorin said after he read. "I want you to be whole again."

I want that too, he wrote with heavy fingers. But even if I can't, it'll never be your fault and I want you to know I know that.

I was hoping to find my mate because I was hoping I'd be able to connect to a witch more closely and find a way to communicate what happened to me. But I never wanted you to think you were solely responsible for helping me.

Lorin took his time to read this note, rescanning lines as his brain processed the information and weighed it against his own expectations of himself. Kit wished he wouldn't. He didn't want to be another reason for Lorin's unhappiness with his life. He only wanted to enrich it.

"Okay," Lorin said quietly after a few minutes. "I understand. You don't have to keep cutely glaring at me."

Kit glared harder just for fun and Lorin chuckled, looking down at his feet as if to hide it. Kit ducked lower and met his eyes upside down impishly, delighted that Lorin didn't know how to handle it, his face going bright red.

"You're a lot, you know," he choked out. "In both forms."

Kit grinned sunnily, incredibly proud of himself.

Lorin licked his lips, his face still a little pink as he pretended to turn and concentrate on the recipe in order to ignore Kit. Kit allowed him a little grace to find his composure. Also, his throat really did hurt a lot. If there was some way to relieve that, or even make it so Kit could talk and not have to waste his shifted time writing, that would be amazing.

He left Lorin to potter around as he nosed through the magic room again with fresh eyes. He inspected everything he couldn't reach as a fox, relishing the use of opposable thumbs in order to open various jars and pots.

Some made him sneeze. Some made his stomach churn. Some he marked to be stolen and hoarded later because they were so pretty.

Lorin wouldn't mind.

As he entertained his spark of mischief, Lorin began grinding some dried ingredients into a powder. It smelled pungent, and he kept frowning and rechecking the recipe every other minute, as if expecting it to go wrong in an instant.

"How long has it been for you?" Lorin asked, breaking the comfortable silence between them.

Kit tilted his head as he counted roughly. It was hard to tell exactly in fox form.

Years , he wrote simply and slid the notebook onto the table next to Lorin.

Lorin gaped when he saw it, looking back up at him in disbelief. "Years?"

5? he guessed. Maybe more.

Lorin dropped the pestle with a clunk, startling and grabbing it before it fell to the floor. He appeared more than flustered by the revelation. He seemed floored.

Kit wasn't about to downplay his own experience. It had been so long. Too long. He'd thought at times that he was simply going to give up and go mad. But something had kept him going. Thoughts of justice and family. Thoughts of a mate, indistinguishable but oh so bright in his mind.

He'd used that as fuel. In his darkest times, after every failure, those had been his comforts.

Until now.

Now comfort was finally tangible.

"You've been looking way too long for me to just fail you," Lorin said.

I'd never been able to find my human shape in all that time before you, he scribbled. So I'd say it's already huge progress.

"I wish we could work out how," Lorin murmured.

I believe in you.

Lorin read it and snorted, which displeased Kit. He underlined the words darkly for emphasis, until Lorin had to grasp his hand to keep him from putting a hole through the book.

"I'll get better about accepting compliments, okay?"

Kit nodded in victory and Lorin shook his head, more hidden smiles creeping over his face. They really were quite lovely.

"Is there anything else you can think of that we don't already know? About what happened?" Lorin checked.

Kit made a face, frustration bubbling up. No. What you saw in my memory is all I know.

"That's okay," Lorin reassured him, turning back to the herbs and letting go of his hand in the process. "I just need to get this to a finer powder, and then we need to steep it and I need to infuse a little magic into it. ‘For some extra kick,' whatever that means."

Kit mourned the loss of skin to skin contact but he didn't pester him. Instead, he observed the repetitive motions of his hands over the mortar and pestle, wondering if there was a way he could help out. He was Lorin's familiar, after all.

"One thing I've been wondering about," Lorin said suddenly, breaking Kit from his musing. "How did you find me?" A blush was sitting high on his cheeks, like talking openly about how they belonged to each other made him shy.

Kit smiled at him and set to writing.

After failing to find my family I had this idea that the safest thing for me was to try and find my mate as a witch, like I told you. I knew my fox would be a familiar for them, so we'd have a deeper bond. Easier way to communicate.

I spent whatever time I could traveling to bonding ceremonies in larger witch communities whenever and wherever I knew they'd be having them. I'd lay low and wait, but there was never anyone that felt like mine. Until you.

Kit hesitated there, his pencil hovering over the page.

I know you weren't happy

"I'm glad it was me." Lorin interrupted him with a hand over the pencil he was holding. Kit met his gaze, seeing so much in it. "I'm sorry I made it seem like I didn't want any of it. Didn't want you. I spent half of my life running away from my powers. You've probably overheard some of my conversations with my grandma, and you've definitely been around for my numerous breakdowns reliving my trauma about being back in this town and this house…"

Kit shuffled closer and laid his head on Lorin's arm, much like he would have done if he was a fox.

Lorin responded the same way, reaching up to card his fingers through the hair over his ear.

Lorin cleared his throat. "I'll tell you about it another time, I promise. Right now, you're my priority. And I have a kettle to boil."

I want to know everything about you, Kit wrote. I'll wait.

Lorin read the words, emotion making his eyes swim a little before he turned suddenly and placed a swift kiss on Kit's forehead. A hand half cupped his jaw and neck, and Kit let out a shuddering breath, feeling the tips of Lorin's nails tickle his nape. The hot dampness of his lips branded his skin, and Kit's own lips begged for touch in response.

Lorin pulled back as quickly as he'd come though, grabbing the heavy bowl of ingredients and hurrying down the stairs without a word. Kit stared at the empty space for a few indiscernible moments before he came back to himself.

That was…so unfair!

Kit hurried after Lorin, nearly tripping on the edges of the blanket and barely remembering to double back and grab the notepad.

By the time he reached the lower floor he could see Lorin braced over the stove where a kettle was already boiling, a cup next to it. His arms were braced wide on the counter and his head was hanging between his shoulders.

Kit marched directly over to him and Lorin jumped in fright.

"Kit," he squeaked, eyes darting anywhere and everywhere.

Kit glowered at him and puckered his lips pointedly.

Lorin's eyes bugged out of his head. "Um…ha…what?"

Kit rolled his eyes and pointed to his puckered lips. He would not be robbed. He was not that kind of fox.

"There's something wrong with your mouth?" Lorin said, being deliberately obtuse.

DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?! Kit wrote in exasperation before shoving it at him.

The kettle screamed in answer and Lorin hustled back to it.

Kit groaned, only to have that irritate his throat again and make him cough. It turned into a small coughing fit that had him seeing stars. Lorin sent him a worried glance, hovering, and the mood was officially killed.

Dammit.

"Go sit down," Lorin said gently, rubbing small circles on his heaving back. "Rest. I'll bring it to you."

Kit sulked away, curling up on the sofa to wait. He sat sideways with his legs tucked up, his temple against the headrest as he watched Lorin move around with more haste after witnessing his coughing. His long, beautifully marked fingers were measuring out what he needed into a strainer before he brought the boiled water over to pour. That earthy pungency filled the cabin in moments, the water releasing the smell further.

After the tea, Lorin will have no excuses , he told himself. Maybe he'd be able to ask for a kiss instead of writing it down.

He satisfied himself with that until a familiar prickle started at the tips of his fingers and toes.

He stared down at them in panic.

No.

Not now.

He needed longer.

He didn't want to leave.

He tried to fight it, but it was no use. He could feel it taking over every cell. Commanding his body to take the shape it demanded. He looked at his fingers helplessly as they morphed into claws.

He wanted to say goodbye to Lorin this time. He didn't know when he'd be able to shift again. But Lorin was busy with the tea he wouldn't even be able to drink as a fox, muttering a small incantation into the steam as he held it between both palms.

Kit could feel the small, bright flame of magic along their bond that he always felt as Lorin's familiar.

And as if in sync, the force acting on his body lessened.

Kit blinked in surprise as the fur and claws crawled back along his skin a few centimeters. Lorin incanted again, that pulse of magic in his chest brightening as the shift receded further.

It couldn't be…

Kit reached for their bond, their link, and held on tightly, letting it light him up from the inside. It was hot and molten, like trying to hold the sun. He felt like he was glowing with it from the inside out, and with it, the shift burned away, leaving him blessedly human still.

He panted in shock more than exertion, shaking all over from both the revelation and the near shift.

Lorin was the key!

Or rather, Lorin's magic was the key.

It wasn't about a specific spell or ritual. Lorin's raw magic was the answer somehow.

Lorin stepped over with the teacup on a saucer. "Careful, it's hot. Glenn said you should try and breathe in some of the steam too."

Kit grasped his arm sharply and Lorin gasped, just avoiding spilling the boiling liquid.

"Kit! What are you doing? You could have burned both of us."

Kit didn't know how to explain himself. He was delirious with it, his head spinning.

He searched for the notepad and pencil, making distressed noises when he couldn't locate them within the blanket.

"Woah, slow down. What's wrong?" Lorin asked, putting the tea aside and crouching beside him to help him search.

They located the items and Kit hastily scribbled over it, fingers feeling bloated and numb.

I think I know why I'm able to shift to human.

"What?" Lorin gasped, eyes snapping up to his. "How?"

Your magic. I was just about to shift and you cast a spell. I felt you use the magic and it pushed the shift away.

Lorin dropped onto his ass on the floor. "My magic?"

Kit nodded. I don't know why or how, but I felt it.

Lorin looked down at his own hands. The signs of his magic were littered all over his skin, the imprint of a fox lay across his palm.

Kit reached for it instinctively, joining their fingers together and tracing the outline reverently. Lorin let him for a few moments before he grasped Kit's hand and moved it closer to his mouth, breathing an incantation into it quietly with his eyes closed.

" My intent is pure;

my intent is clear.

Fire, water, air, and wind,

my intent is true.

Feel my magic;

bless it back to me times three. "

He repeated it three times before Kit felt a surge of magic in his chest, like Lorin was pushing it directly at him for once instead of him feeling it as an aftershock on the periphery. He sucked in a breath, closing his own eyes as it rushed through him.

"Did it work?" Lorin asked quietly.

Kit could only nod.

"It's a temporary spell. It doesn't do a lot. Teenagers used to use it before exams—that's where I picked it up. It's the only thing that works quickly to give a little magic kick without ingredients. It's like taking an energy drink," Lorin said quietly.

It felt like it too, fizzy and bubbling in his blood. He chased the zing of it around his body, unable to grasp a full hold. He could already feel it dissipating slowly.

Kit felt the sofa sink next to him. Their hands stayed interlocked.

"Kit?"

Kit fluttered his eyes back open and found Lorin staring earnestly at him.

"You okay?"

Kit nodded, feeling the beginnings of a giddy smile form on his face. He hid his mouth behind his free hand, wishing he could laugh with joy but not wanting to risk it.

Lorin smiled back at him like he was sharing the joy, looking more hopeful than he'd ever seen him. "We can figure this out, Kit. This is so huge."

Kit nodded shakily. It was almost too much to believe. In his euphoria, he leaned forward and pressed a small kiss to Lorin's mouth. Well, approximately. He missed slightly, hitting the corner of his lip and chin. It still shot a burst of serotonin straight into his brain like a starburst though.

There. We're even , he thought as he pulled back. He pressed his guilty lips together innocently, eyes wide and guileless to hide the mischief lurking beneath.

Lorin seemed frozen solid, and Kit smothered another giggle that wanted to surface, reaching across Lorin and grabbing his tea while Lorin recalibrated. He didn't want it to go to waste, and how else was he going to get his throat well enough to laugh at Lorin's stupidly cute face.