Chapter 8

You got this, Lils, I told myself.

I so didn't "got this."

I gaped at the most beautiful cock I'd ever seen with a looped piercing through the end.

There you go, gawking again.

It wasn't like I'd never seen a piercing before, but I wasn't expecting such complete perfection.

Azrael had piercings down there—a lot of them. As for Samael, he had a Prince Albert, where the loop went through the tip and downward. This sort of looked like that, but right side up instead. And it was more like the icing on the cake.

A very hard, goddess-crafted cake I wanted to lick all over.

Asher was definitely part incubus. His body had lines in all the right places and muscles I hadn't even known existed. He was ripped, but not over-the-top decked out like Orion or even Dante. There was a lithe grace to him, making him look like a masterpiece I could admire for hours.

"Never seen a reverse Prince Albert, love?" Asher asked with a smug grin on his face. He probably thought that was what had me so stunned. It was more… how beautiful he was.

Dante looked like he wanted to punch him.

"No," I admitted, not sure what else I was supposed to say.

Or do.

Try breathing, my inner voice supplied, and I managed to suck in a shaky breath.

"Tell me a story about us, Asher," I said, trying to distract myself. Seeing him like this felt like a little too much, too fast.

Normally, I'd be all in. At this point, it was clear that Asher was a Virtue and there was already a connection between us. Dante was on board, sort of, and I'd learned the hard way that fighting fate—or forcing it—didn't often work out for me.

The desire to sink into the incubus and learn his body all over again made my muscles ache, but I locked them and refused to move.

I wasn't so sure I could go through with the task of hurting him.

I also knew I couldn't risk death-by-incubus-sex, either.

Which left me stranded on an island of my own making as I blinked down at the most beautiful male I'd ever seen.

"A dirty story, or a sweet one?" Asher asked as he fell back on the bed and looped his hands behind his head. The crystal rolled against one of the pillows and the whispers started up again. I did my best to ignore its complaints.

"Dirty one," Dante responded, not giving me a chance to reply as he began removing my boots. He took one off and neatly set it against the wall.

"One of my favorites was when we were on a trip. You loved nature, so we'd go to the ends of the earth to untouched areas humans hadn't walked for many years. There are still a few remote pockets like that, if you know where to find them. Anyway, we found this little stretch of land between hazardous mountains. No one seemed to know about it." He chuckled as an old glint entered his eye. "You decided to run naked in the woods and see if I could find you." He grinned. "You were kind of a free spirit. You were lucky no one else was within ten miles of us, or they might have been in danger."

"Why?" I asked as Dante removed my other boot. I kept my gaze strictly on Asher's face, even though I was very tempted to drink in the sight of him again. He was supposed to be feeding on Dante's lust, not mine. And there was an uneasy queasiness building up in my stomach, warning me not to give the incubus too much.

Asher stared as Dante stood up and popped the button on my pants, quietly undressing me even though he knew the incubus was watching. Or perhaps it was because he knew the incubus was paying attention, so he was smug about it. But he fumbled at Asher's next sentence.

"If I found you, I got to fuck you however I wanted," he said, his eyes flicking up, flaring with heat when Dante yanked the leather down my legs.

My Hunter moved behind me, looped his arm around my waist, and sat me in his lap. He'd taken one of the chairs so we could face the incubus while he talked.

He'd completely removed his pants, leaving his hard erection pressing against me as I wiggled with only my underwear to separate us. I also still wore my silky halter top. My nipples beaded under the material and Asher's gaze dipped, seeming to appreciate the view.

Then Dante slowly raked his fingers over my thighs, spreading me.

The crystal hissed, the whispers shrieking in my mind as I realized it was feeding again.

But on what? Who was in pain?

A vein in Asher's neck throbbed as his jaw flexed. "I'm a jealous mate, love. Back then? It was just you and me. If anyone would have seen you, I would have ripped out their eyes."

Dante slipped his fingers underneath my underwear, making me sink my teeth into my lower lip. The crystal fizzed as if stoked in a fire.

I don't like this, I decided.

I tried to close my legs, but Dante punished me by spearing his fingers inside me, making me gasp.

Asher didn't come to my rescue. He kept his fingers locked behind his head as he watched.

Did he feel like he deserved this punishment? For what? What could he have possibly done?

"I don't want to hurt him like this," I told Dante as I gripped his wrist—hard—making him stop.

My Hunter immediately retreated, leaving my legs quivering. My body wanted more, but my soul felt pulled in two different directions, leaving it confused.

"Let him continue," Asher interjected. He glowered when Dante didn't obey him.

But Dante listened to me. Asher had some work to do in order to be accepted into the fold. Even if my soul knew him, he was a stranger.

"Why?" I asked. "This is hurting you."

"That's the point," Dante said from behind me. "And it's working. The crystal is darker than it was before."

I glanced at it, seeing that he was right. But the whispers still hissed and buzzed in my head, wanting more.

If we had to do this every day, I was going to be too worn out from the emotional turmoil of it all.

"But why?" I insisted, looking back at Asher and his perfect, godlike body. "Why would destiny give me nine mates when my first one was taught not to share?"

Asher chuckled, probably at my choice of words. "Destiny is a fickle beast." His gaze darkened, the gold seeping out of his eyes as they returned to a slate-gray color. I realized that was a sign of when his incubus was coming out.

All of us hummed like a live wire, needing an outlet before we imploded. It was probably like catnip to him.

He cursed, then jumped off the bed and grabbed Dante's dagger from the wall. The Hunter tensed behind me but didn't stop him.

Asher stuffed the hilt into my hand, then forced me to draw a bloodied line down his chest, ruining his perfection.

Dante's heat burned into my spine, the sensation leaving me dizzy when I was used to having wings to block anything from behind me. Instead, I was left completely flattened against my Hunter's chest as I leaned into him.

Asher's eyes fluttered as he drank in Dante's arousal. I hated that this was what did it for Dante right now, but I also understood.

He was a tormented soul, and that was something we had connected on. He was a monster, and so was I.

He just dealt with his demons a little differently than I did.

"I can't feed on you, love. It's too dangerous," Asher explained as he gripped my fist, forcing me to keep the blade digging into his flesh. "Only the Hunter is fair game, and this is what he likes."

Anger surged in my chest. "Fuck fair." I pushed him back, throwing him off-balance. Dante followed me as I stood, staying close behind me like a lethal shadow as I moved. "Did destiny play fair when it took me from you?" I asked, walking between his legs as he fell back onto the bed. I crawled up him, straddling him while Dante planted his arms on either side of the bed, making us dip. I thought he might yank me off the male, but he didn't.

I was still in control.

"No," Asher admitted when I accidentally grazed his erection. It sent a shock between my legs. With only my underwear on, I could feel the stimulating bulb placed strategically on the rounded piercing. So is that the purpose of its orientation? I wondered.

"How did I die?" I asked Asher as I eased lower, this time purposefully moving myself over his piercing again.

He hissed out a breath as a wave of dizziness washed over me.

He was feeding on my lust. He couldn't help it.

But I trusted him not to go too far. He could control it. I knew he could.

"Don't make me talk about this," he said, fluttering his eyes closed as Dante held his wrists down, encouraging me with pressure from behind. His erection rubbed over my ass, only stoking my desire more.

Because this felt better. This felt right.

If only Asher could stop holding back.

Reaching up, I plucked at the strings holding my halter in place, letting it fall. Asher's eyes fluttered open and he soaked in the sight of my breasts in front of his face. Dante had him pinned, so he couldn't touch. Only look.

But I was weakening his resolve. He lifted his hips to match my movements, sending pressure radiating through my core and butterflies bursting to life in my stomach.

The crystal whispered encouragements in my head. This hurt him as much as it aroused him, but it was the kind of hurt he needed.

He'd held on to this sorrow for too long. It was time he let it out.

"Talk," Dante demanded. Maybe he knew what I was up to, or maybe he just saw that I was hurting Asher more than making him jealous or cutting him with a blade ever could.

Asher hesitated, because what I was asking for was him to open up a box that he'd locked tight.

"Talk to me," I echoed, continuing my soft, encouraging movements with my hips. Sweat broke out down my spine as desire curled in my core. I knew when Asher drank it up, because an instant later my stomach dropped and my insides felt cold.

Dante replaced any heat I lost. He released one of Asher's wrists, then wrapped his fingers around my throat and licked my ear. Asher watched him as if transfixed.

I was losing track of who was feeding on who.

The crystal sputtered.

Asher's eyes changed.

And I trembled as my Hunter's hand trailed around my body, then flicked my underwear aside.

He pushed into me first, just an inch. Just enough to make me stop breathing.

Asher instantly tensed and his brows drew together, but he seemed to manage focusing his feeding on Dante's arousal.

That's it, Asher, I thought at him, even though I knew he couldn't hear me.

"Tell me what happened," I insisted once I learned how to form words again.

He worked on a swallow while Dante gently moved. He didn't press in any further. He slipped his cock through my wet folds, then pushed in just enough to stretch me, before doing it again.

I realized that, from Asher's vantage point, he would be able to see what Dante was doing to me. Jealousy flared in his eyes, but I spotted something else there, too.

He was starting to enjoy this.

"A demon found you in that forest the next time we went there to re-create the experience," Asher admitted, looking up. "I don't know why I started with that story. It didn't end well the second time around."

I knew why. It was because somewhere deep inside, Asher knew he needed healing. He needed to talk about this, to go through the memories moment by moment like flash cards until his mind sorted out every single one.

Until he made sense of it, or accepted it, whichever came first.

"What did the demon do?" I asked, not wanting to hear the rest but knowing this was what Asher needed.

His jaw flexed. "I can't, love. I just…" He went silent when I tentatively touched him. I ran my fingers down the silky length of him, enjoying his perfection.

I toyed with the piercing, then gripped his base before guiding him to my entrance.

Dante made room, but just barely. He stayed an inch inside of me, daring me to continue.

I wasn't afraid of pushing my limits. He wanted to see if I was hoping he'd back down. I knew he wouldn't.

I just didn't care.

Asher's eyes darkened, going from gray to black when I sank onto him and my mouth parted on a silent gasp.

Dante refused to be pushed out, so he eased in further, competing for space as my body stretched around the two of them. An initial burn radiated as my flesh complained, but that was only fuel for the crystal, so I tolerated my donation for the day's quota.

I held very still while I adjusted to the two of them inside of me. They seemed to be holding their breaths, waiting to see what I'd do.

Dante pulsed inside me, and Asher's body mimicked the throb in response.

"Did you see… what happened?" I asked him, needing him to finish the thread of the horrible memory. He'd held on to this for too long. It was time he let it out.

His fingers dug into my hips, dimpling my flesh. "Yes."

I eased down an inch, making sweat break out over my body again. "Tell me what you saw."

Anger flared in his eyes, but I knew it was at the memory. Not at me. "The demon had managed illusion magic. He looked like me. That was how he tricked you, love. That was how he got close enough to…" He didn't seem able to finish the sentence.

"Which demon was it?" Dante asked from behind me. His fingers stroked my spine as if praising me for doing such a good job.

But even he was a captive to Asher's story now.

His eyes fluttered closed as his brows pinched together. "I don't know."

That was why Asher felt like a failure. That was why he felt like he was to blame. A demon had taken his form and tricked me.

No, not me. A past version of me that didn't exist anymore.

I had absolutely been created anew when I'd been born into this life. I wasn't just a goddess. Actually, that was such a dormant part of me that I was someone else entirely now.

I knew that hurt Asher, too. I wasn't the person he had lost. Not exactly.

Whoever she was, he'd never get her back.

"I'm sorry," I said as tears burned at the edges of my eyes. I lowered my body in apology, trying to show him how much I hated hurting him.

Because I had failed him, too. I'd fallen for a demon's ploy and let this happen.

Asher grabbed on to my hips, driving into me as if he sought to fix this by force.

Dante grunted at the pressure, then matched Asher's movements. "Don't be sorry," he said as he wrapped his fingers around my throat, pulling me up as he pushed himself all the way inside. He bit my neck as I whimpered, my body moving with his, seeking more of the bliss he and Asher offered. "If that hadn't happened, I would never have met you. I would have been nothing without you, Lily. You're not just his goddess. You're mine, too."

My body clenched as Dante drove harder into me as if to prove a point. Asher's thumb found my clit and he swirled, making a sob catch in my throat. He managed to move with Dante, using skilled maneuvers to put pressure in all the right places. His piercing was a tool for a skilled lover, and Asher seemed to have developed the skill of pleasing my body to perfection. Even if he'd never shared me like this, he had no trouble finding a rhythm with Dante that had me panting.

I held on to Dante's forearm as he thrust and Asher's fingers swirled.

A steady hum of dizziness threatened to take me under, but I knew he had it under control.

I trusted him, so I let go. I rode the rising current until an orgasm washed over me like a tidal wave. A scream ripped out of me, one that released everything I'd been holding back.

Dante's heat filled my body and Asher pulsed inside of me as well, both of them following me over the edge, healing something inside of us that had been broken.

When I looked up, I saw my own flushed expression staring back at me as a broad reflection offered me an incredible sight. Asher on the bed, his head thrown back as sweat made his dark hair curl around his perfect face, and Dante holding on to my throat as he moaned into my ear.

So… that's why mirrors are on the ceiling.