Chapter 4

4

Mack

"I take three days off and have to be told by Rhonda about you being dropped off by a man folk on Monday." Tonya fans herself. "Apparently, he was quite the catch. A regular Mr. Darcy."

I laugh at her dramatics and continue rehoming the cart of books beside me. You'd think with being almost twenty years older than us and the manager here that Rhonda would have more important things to be doing than gossiping. Apparently not. "Just a …" I pause, because friend doesn't sound right. Other than our date, a few texts, and the other morning, we haven't had much to do with each other. I declined breakfast with the excuse I needed to work, but if I'm honest, it felt too weird.

Luke is great, but I don't want to lead the poor guy on .

"Uh- huh. " Tonya gets a coy smile. "A … lover? Hottie? Boyyyfriend?"

"None of those." I frown. "I was going to say friend, but can he be called that when I barely even know the guy?"

"Know as in know or know as in knooow ?"

"Please stop."

She sobers up. "What's wrong? You know I'm only teasing."

"I know, but Luke isn't like that. Also …" I play with the corner of the book I've just picked up. "Davey's home."

She snorts. "Goodie."

"For three months."

Her long exhale breezes through the quiet air around us. "Well. That's different."

"It's been so nice having him home and knowing he doesn't have to leave again in a few days."

"But … he will leave. Right?"

It's the undeniable truth that I don't want to face. I'm happy living in my own bubble of la-la land and would really like it if people could stop throwing reality at me. Reality sucks. Zero rating out of ten. Where are the mystical unicorns of possibility? Oh, that's right, they died .

Just straight up smother me in delulu, thank you.

"Not for a while," I say. "It'll be good for the kids."

"And what about you?"

"It will be good for me too." Having Davey home is always a godsend, and not only because I like looking at his butt.

"It's not healthy that you guys still live together."

"It makes the most sense."

"So you say." Tonya lightly grabs my arm. "We love you, Mack. We're like a family here, and I know you miss Davey, but Rhonda said this guy was all goo-goo eyes for you, and you deserve to have someone look at you like that."

"Davey used to look at me like that."

"But he doesn't anymore."

I gently shake her off. "Goo-goo eyes are all good in the beginning, but even if I did date Luke, he wouldn't look at me like that forever. Am I supposed to give up on my marriage because we're not silly idiots over each other anymore?"

She raises her eyebrows and looks at me in concern. "No … you're supposed to give up on your marriage when you're not actually married." She lifts her hands like she's surrendering. "I get it. Butt out."

"Thank you." It occurs to me she's not the only one lately who's given up on trying to warn me away from Davey. It'd be nice if I could find someone who was one hundred percent on my side. Art is supportive, but it's against his better judgment, so I don't feel completely okay confiding in him.

I think of some of my other friends in the divorced men's group that Art and Barney started. They're all awesome, but Davey is friends with most of them as well, so it's a delicate topic. Payne is anti-marriage after his first one went to hell. Griff would rather talk about sex than romance, and Keller is way too logical. His advice would be to flat out ask Davey if there's any chance there, but that would never work. I need to be sneakier than that. Cleverer. Davey needs to come to the realization that he needs us himself.

Orson could potentially be team Mack, but I don't think he'd want to go behind Davey's back with it.

What's the world coming to that a guy can't even get his friends on board with a little parent trap romancing? If only Van and Kiera were older. They'd be all too eager to lock us away for a romantic dinner together .

Probably.

The people I work with have heard too much about my heartbreak after the divorce to be Team Davey either. I'd started work here not long after the ink dried on those contracts, needing something to distract me from the shithole my life had fallen into. I knew I should have bottled all those feelings up instead. Damn those healthy emotional habits.

So now I have no one to talk to, when all I need is just one person in my corner, cheering me on, telling me I can do it, and talking me through the noise when I start getting doubty.

I'm sure Davey is my person, so why is it so fucking hard to find one other person who thinks so as well?

I finish sorting the books, then help set up for the princess tea party we're having this morning. Seeing all the little kids come in with their princess dresses and tiaras makes me miss when Kiera would come to these every week with me. A lot of the themed ideas we have were started because I'd been looking for things for her to do, and our library memberships have been at a record high since.

Books are a big part of my life, but bringing the community together is why I'm here. The tea party takes up most of my morning, then Trent Briller comes in just before lunchtime, wanting to talk history as he loads up on World War Two books, and after he's done, Rhonda needs my help to hold a ladder while she climbs up and dusts off the top of the shelves.

No matter how many times I try to remind her she's fifty-nine, she steadfastly refuses to let me do it, so I end up hovering awkwardly under her, ready to play catch the granny.

I'm not confident in my chances of stopping us both from crashing to the floor though. By the time she climbs down again and pats me on the shoulder in thanks, there's stale sweat at my hairline and prickling my back .

Apparently, people gambling with death stresses me out, who knew?

I stop by the front desk to grab my coat and head out for lunch when I pause at the book resting innocently on the table. It's a shiny new copy of The Hobbit , and there's a piece of paper sticking out of the top of it.

I tug the paper out and read the handwritten note.

Mack,

What's a hobbit's favorite outing?

Going to the Frodeo!

A smile springs to my face.

You're worth more than what a hobbit spends on food each week.

From, your secret admirer.

My secret admirer? Is this a joke? Given the book and the note, I'd say it's not so secret. Still, even if I'm not interested in Luke like that … happy vibes come alive in my gut. It's nice. The attention and knowing that someone thinks that highly of me.

I'm walking a little taller as I head down the street in search of food.

It's too bad I'm so madly in love with Davey because Luke has a good heart. I'll have to let him know that when I make it clear I'm not interested because he'll make someone very happy one day, and I don't want him to think my lack of interest is anything he's done.

In fact, if it wasn't for Davey, that little note would have me messaging him right now to meet up.

It was cute. Very cute.

I can't remember the last time a man showed interest in me; I forget how it's all even supposed to work.

Instead of messaging Luke though, I pull out my phone and message Davey instead.

I'm heading for lunch. What are you doing?

He texts back almost instantly.

At Killer Brew catching up with Art. Come join us?

Hmm … lunch with company sounds good. Lunch with my ex-husband who I'm trying to win back and the friend who knows all about my plan? Risky. What if Art lets something slip? Or if Joey shows up and gets in one of his teasing moods?

I shouldn't risk it, but on the other hand, I get to see Davey. Four hours has been four too many.

On my way.

I cut through the next street to the boardwalk and follow it from the quiet backstreets where the library is to the busier area in the middle of town where Killer Brew stands overlooking the water. It's an impressive building, made even more impressive with Kilborough Penitentiary looming over it in the background.

My nose is frozen by the time I step inside, and I'm so cold I almost forget to be nervous. Almost. Because the second my gaze drops to where Davey is sitting opposite Art in a booth, it hits me right on cue.

I just love him so much .

If my plan doesn't work, I'll kick myself for the rest of eternity for ever testing him with my stupid divorce suggestion. If I'd never brought it up, we'd still be together. Miserable, but together. After all, misery loves company, so why the hell shouldn't I forcefully tie us together in an unholy abomination of marital unrest?

Davey slides over toward the wall as soon as he sees me and pats the space right next to him. I'd been going to sit next to Art so I didn't look so obvious about my need to be close to him, but this takes the decision out of my hands.

As soon as I sit down, I breathe in his familiar cologne.

"What are you two up to?" I ask.

Art answers immediately. "Planning world domination. We're trying to decide if we should put you down as a sex slave or the one who writes about our heroic quest for supremacy."

My wide eyes swing from him to Davey.

Davey shrugs. "If it helps, my vote was firmly for you being our scribe."

"Wait. You were actually talking about that?"

Art blinks at me. "Is there another position you'd like instead? Universal leader is taken, but there might be something on our council of fuckery."

"No, I meant were you really talking about the world domination thing? "

"People have to have goals, Mack."

I'm still not sure if Art is serious or not.

"Council of fuckery?" Davey asks. "Is that what we voted on?"

"I voted, you lost."

"How does that work if it's one on one?"

"Oh, because I have Joey. So all my votes count as two."

"Well, I have Mack. He's automatically on my side." Davey turns to me. "Aren't you?"

"Of course."

Art bows his head solemnly. "Only the romance can form a bond so deep your universal power doubles."

I narrow my eyes at him. "Does that mean basically all our friends are more powerful than us?"

"Hell no." Art looks at me like I'm not making sense. "That only works when you're the supreme ruler of the galaxy."

"I thought it was universal leader?"

Art looks to Davey for support. "I don't think he understands this game."

"I understand." And because I can't help myself, I turn to Davey too. "It means we have to get remarried, and because that's love times two, you'd outrank Art."

Davey smirks. "Sounds like you're onto something."

"Okay, game over," Art shouts, slapping his hands on the table. "Order your food and get out."

"I think he expected us to worship him," I stage-whisper at Davey.

"Definite inferiority complex."

Art rolls his eyes and leaves us at the table.

I turn so I'm facing Davey.

"Didn't want me for a sex slave?" I tease .

"Call me protective or some shit."

"Just saying, you remember all those things I can do with my tongue."

Davey's eyes lock onto mine. "And that's exactly why I said no."

My heartbeat kicks up a notch as we sit there, watching each other. "Didn't want anyone else to know that, huh?"

"I'm sure plenty of other men know by now, but I don't need to hear about it."

It's on the tip of my tongue to tell him that no other men know. There's been no one since him, and the few times I've come close to that happening, I couldn't bring myself to go through with it. But then his MyMatch profile pops into my head, and the words die. Admitting I've been pathetically pining over him while he's been out there hooking up would only make things awkward for us both.

"I know exactly what you mean," I agree.