35 Extreme Fussitude

Lily

“But why can’t the house be named Carl?” Sharkie insisted, homework abandoned on the kitchen table.

“It feels weird to say that we live in Carl . Why can’t we call the house something else?” Lily asked, leaning against the door frame.

“What’s the name of the house in the hobbit book? Baggy End? Why don’t we call the house Carl’s Baggy End or something?” Sharkie said.

Do NOT form a mental image of that, and do not under any circumstances laugh about it.

Lily managed to hide her amusement by clearing her throat and biting her tongue hard.

“It’s Bag End, and no, we aren’t calling the house Carl’s”—she coughed—“Baggy End.”

Sharkie chewed on the end of her pencil, deep in thought. Kicked her sock-covered feet in the air. Wiggled. “Carlton?”

Lily couldn’t keep herself from laughing that time. “Alright, I can work with Carlton. If you need any more help with your homework, let me know. I’ll be in the library.”

“’Kay,” Sharkie chirped, leaning back over the table. As Lily headed down the hall, she heard Sharkie whisper loudly, “I’ll still call you Carl though, don’t worry.”

The timbers in the kitchen groaned happily, and Sharkie giggled.

Lily shook her head, making a beeline to her nest of pillows and blankets on the window bed, eager to dive back into her book.

Several chapters and an indeterminate amount of time later, the door to the library swung open.

“Someone’s knocking on the door,” Sharkie announced. “I didn’t answer it because I don’t know if it’s someone we like or not.”

Lily kicked free of her blankets. “I don’t think Paradise would let people we didn’t like get in here.”

Sharkie hung back in the hallway, just around the corner from the entryway and within sprinting distance of her room, wariness all over her round face while Lily approached the front door.

The latch clicked under her palm, swinging open on silent hinges and letting the cheerful sunshine spill over the floorboards.

“Hey, princess,” Bel rasped.

“Fuck,” Lily said simply.

“It won’t be my best performance, but I’ll give it a shot.” His grin was weary.

Oh, Bel…

Lily raked her eyes over every inch of him, cataloging the armor that she would have drooled over if he hadn’t looked so careworn. The weaponry, the filth, the new dark spot on his wing, the deep shadows under his eyes—oh, his eyes.

Sad. Exhausted. The silver of them dull.

“I didn’t want to go home,” he said quietly, shifting his weight. Vulnerability glimmered in those eyes.

“Come on, big guy, let’s get you taken care of.” Lily took his hand, tugging him inside. “Don’t worry about your boots,” she told him when he paused and started to bend over.

He straightened with a wince and a tiny wobble. Lily tucked herself against his side in an effort to support, mentally racing through what she had available and what might be helpful to the situation.

Sharkie peered around the corner, eyes widening when she saw Bel. She scampered across the foyer to take up a position on Bel’s other side as Lily guided him towards her room. Sharkie could barely reach Bel’s waist, but she tried.

“Hey, kiddo,” Bel said, patting her on the shoulder. “How was the sleepover?”

“Fun. Lily wouldn’t let me bring Cerby home with us, but that’s okay. I don’t think Max would have liked him very much.”

“Max could have taken him,” Bel said as they reached the door to Lily’s room.

“Are you okay?” Sharkie’s voice was small.

Please don’t let this set her back. Please don’t let this give her nightmares or something new to fear. I can explain everything, baby shark…

Bel crouched down slowly to smile at her. He gestured for her to come closer, leaning in to whisper in a pantomime of secrecy, as if Lily weren’t standing right there. “I’m fine, I’m just tired and want Lily to fuss over me.” He winked at her and stood, leaning dramatically against the doorway.

Sharkie’s face lit up with understanding before she schooled her face into a mask of seriousness and turned to Lily. “I think Bel needs fussing,” she said with the gravity of a doctor in hospital drama delivering bad news. Sharkie gestured to where Bel was blinking pathetically. “Look at him.”

Despite her concern for the genuinely rough shape that Bel was in, Lily had to smother a chuckle at their performances.

“Well then. I guess you have your homework, and I have mine. Let the fussing commence,” Lily said with equal seriousness, sliding under Bel’s arm and tucking herself against his side. She felt him shoot Sharkie a thumbs-up behind her back, a gesture that Sharkie returned with both hands before the door shut behind them.

Bel immediately straightened and held her against him with a surer grip. Lily gave him a light squeeze, recalling how sore he’d been the last time she’d seen him after a mission/battle/whatever the fuck it had been, leading him into the cozy luxury of her bathroom. The shower had already started itself, and a plush oversized towel that Lily had never seen before hung on the heated towel bar.

“You don’t have to actually fuss, princess. I’m fine.”

“You signed up for fussing, you’re getting fussing. From the look of it, you require some extreme fussitude, so suck it up, big guy,” Lily said, mostly teasing.

Mostly.

She reached for one of his weapons and undid the straps, carefully setting it on the counter before reaching for another, while he took care of even more. After they’d amassed a small armory by the sink, they tackled his armor and his boots. She didn’t miss the way his usually nimble fingers fumbled once or twice on a buckle, or the little exhalations of pain when his body moved a certain way.

Eventually, Bel stood in his pants and shirt, both made of a tough black fabric, rolling his neck and shoulders.

Lily started to pull the hem of his shirt free, but Bel stopped her and clucked disapprovingly.

“What do you take me for, Lils, a cheap date?”

“I’ll feed you later. Strip, please.”

“Maybe I don’t want you to see what’s under my clothes,” he said, clearly hedging.

Lily folded her arms and arched her eyebrow at him. “I’ve had your cock in my mouth. I think I can handle seeing whatever bruises you’re hiding under there.”

He tried to scowl at her, but the effect was somewhat ruined by the way his lips tipped up at the corners. “I am not bruised.”

She poked him in the side. He flinched and capitulated.

“Okay, maybe I’m a little bruised. Have your way with me.”

“Thank you,” Lily said primly, tugging his shirt free.

He took over, unclasping the panels around his wings and pulling it over his head, the heavy muscles of his torso working under his skin. Lily traced the outline of a particularly black bruise on his ribs with the barest touch of her fingertips, throat tightening in concern. Bel dropped the shirt and went still. She trailed her fingers across his stomach to a lighter mark, then up to a scrape near his collarbone, finally bringing her hands down to brace lightly on his hips. She pressed her lips to the center of his chest, feeling the reassuring thud of his heart.

Bel gently scooped her up, ignoring her murmur of protest, set her on the counter next to the pile of weapons, then leaned in and buried his face in her neck. She skated her palms up his back, tracing the dip of his spine, soothing the knots she could feel by his shoulder blades as the bathroom grew misty.

Her big-hearted warrior.

“I lost nine soldiers,” he said quietly, not lifting his head. Lily held him a little tighter. “In the grand scheme of it all, nine soldiers out of the legion I had wasn’t bad. Isn’t bad. But it almost hurts worse when there’s few enough to name. It’s more personal. Losing soldiers always makes me feel…quiet for a while. But I didn’t want to be alone. Being alone reminds me of...” He trailed off.

Lily smoothed over the snarl of his hair. “What were their names?”

He whispered them, and she felt the weight of their loss in every syllable. They curled together in silence, in acknowledgment. Bel eventually kissed her shoulder in quiet thanks. She slid off the counter and together they worked his stiff pants down his legs and over his tail. There was no heat in seeing him naked in that moment. She’d appreciate his glory later. He stepped into the oversized shower, and Lily took the opportunity to slip out, pressing a hand to her chest that ached in a new way.

Sharkie had settled cross-legged on the bed with her workbook in her lap, and she looked up when Lily sat on the edge of the bed.

“What’s the finger trick for multiplying nines again?”

Lily showed her.

“That’s what I thought,” Sharkie said, scribbling down numbers. “Bel is okay, right?”

“Yeah, he’s just tired and sore and a little sad, so he might be quieter than you’re used to.”

Sharkie nodded sagely and closed her notebook. “Can I fuss too, or is this a grown-up thing? Because I know exactly how to help.”

“I think Bel can use all the help we can give him today.”

“Cool. Bring him to the library,” Sharkie ordered, sliding off the bed and running out the door. She ran back into the doorway. “Like, when he’s done,” she clarified, before running off again.

“Do you need help?” Lily called, trying to figure out what, exactly, Sharkie was up to.

“No!” Sharkie yelled.

Something scraped over the floor—a chair maybe?—and a cupboard banged. Something clattered loudly.

“Still no!” Sharkie called, then, quietly, “Shit…I think?”

* * *

Lily was waiting on the edge of the bed when he emerged from the bathroom wearing black sweatpants and a sleeveless gray shirt that Carlton had provided. He strode towards her, but she stood and stopped him just before he collapsed on the bed.

“Sharkie wants to fuss over you a little too. I told her you might be quieter today, but you don’t have to if you just want to sleep.”

His smile was tired but pleased. “I could use some Sharkie fussing.”

“In that case, I have orders to take you to the library,” she said, taking his hand and leading the way.

She pushed the doors of the library open and found Sharkie waiting on the other side. She immediately grabbed each of their hands, towing them over to the window seat that Lily had spent half the day lounging on. The pillows and blankets had been rearranged, and Lily’s book had been set aside with a napkin stuck in it as a bookmark.

Sharkie released their hands and pointed at the window seat. “Cuddle. I’ll be right back.” She ran out of the room.

Lily looked at Bel.

Bel looked at Lily.

“You heard the shark, cuddle up, buttercup,” Bel said.

“As the shark commands. I have an idea.” Lily lay so that her shoulders and neck were slightly propped up and patted her chest. “You look like you need held, big guy.”

Bel crawled over her, sparking heat low in her belly that she immediately quashed. He draped his heavy body between her legs, lowering to rest the side of his face against her abdomen. Thankfully, the vague c-shape of his horns lent itself well to the position, the upper curve of one horn just barely touching the underside of her breast, while his wings spread to drape against the sun-warmed window and down to the floor. Lily ran her fingers through his damp hair just as Sharkie hurried back into the room with a mug.

“Hot cocoa fixes everything. And it has extra marshmallows. And a straw so you can drink it lying down.” Sharkie set it by Lily’s leg, and Bel steadied it with one large hand. “I’m not done!” Sharkie ran out the door again.

Bel lifted his head to take a long drink through the chunky straw, then relaxed with a sigh that seemed to come from his soul.

Sharkie hustled back into the library, with a confused Max in her arms and a book in her teeth. She deposited the cat against Bel’s side, just under his wing, then took the book out of her teeth and handed it to Lily before crawling over their legs and up their sides to snuggle between Lily and the window.

“Cuddles. Cocoa. Cat. Book. The three C’s…and a B, that can solve almost anything. Aloud, please,” Sharkie said, pointing to the book in Lily’s hands.

Lily turned it over, the well-worn pages as familiar to her as her own face. The Hobbit . Her first bedtime story. Her dad had started reading it to her when she’d been five, and over the years, they worked their way through the Lord of the Rings , her dad’s love of the story becoming her own. She’d given it to Sharkie and offered to read it to her, but Sharkie had always said “not yet.”

Bel sipped his cocoa and patted Sharkie’s foot. “Thank you, Sharkie.” He curled his tail around Lily’s calf. “Chapter one?” he rumbled.

Lily winked at Sharkie, who beamed brighter than the sunlight washing over them, then opened the book with one hand, running her other one through Bel’s hair.

Family. My family.

“In a hole in the ground…”