Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

Nora Lilja

A few days later

" S omeone's got a date. You never rush out of here," Cal noted.

I smirked and shouldered my messenger bag. "I have more than a date. I have a sleepover." And the woman I'd be spending the night with was currently outside waiting to pick me up.

I was in heaven.

Well, cuddle heaven—so far. We'd spent the night on Saturday too, but nothing had happened besides kissing and cuddling. Which, to be honest, had been all kinds of perfect, because the Mistress in Penelope had come out to play. She hadn't allowed me to derail her for a second. And she was clearly on a mission to get to know me.

"So that's why you asked Ted to cover for you tomorrow?"

"Guilty," I sang. "And on Sunday. See you next week!"

He chuckled. "Have a good one, kid."

I blew kisses to my favorite lizards on the way out of the shop—particularly Daycrawler, who was being picked up by her new owner this weekend. They'd probably name her something ridiculous. To me, she'd always be Daycrawler.

I stepped out of one humid place and into another, though it wasn't that bad yet. Come June, I'd hate Virginia just a little bit. It was why I tried to live in a swimming pool during the summer.

Just like she'd said in her text, Penelope was parked right outside in her old truck, and I beamed and opened the door.

"Hi!"

"Hey, sweet girl." She patted the spot next to her, and I was quick to jump in. "You looking forward to a few days off?"

"So much." I leaned over and kissed her cheek, because I wanted to. We didn't have boundaries; otherwise, I would've gone straight for her kissable lips. But I had hope. The questions she asked me, the interest she had in my life—it wasn't what one subjected a future buddy to so eagerly.

Last weekend, after the party, we'd spent a couple hours with the others by the pool, grilling burgers and talking and cozying it up in a lounger. And then she'd invited me to her cabin, where we'd lost track of time swapping childhood stories and how we'd eventually found kink. She'd once been invited to a party, whereas I'd found BDSM reading romance novels.

We'd friended each other online too, and we'd talked about friends' activity in albums, discussion groups, and journals.

I wanted another weekend like that, only we switched out a daytime party for the big Game, and maybe we added sex to the repertoire, before we cuddled and talked all night.

Penelope had set a pace that I found myself needing but not wanting. The impatient girl who'd had a crush on Penelope for so long wanted to get down and dirty right freaking now, but I wasn't sure my mind would be at ease if we'd gone that route. Instead, we'd texted a lot the past few days, and before we'd parted ways on Sunday morning, our alone time together had been so…almost tranquil. And fun .

"When were you and Ash getting together?" she asked.

"Tomorrow," I answered. "He said he was bringing dinner."

We were gonna discuss the last details of our boundaries and so on.

Penelope nodded and slowed down before a red light. "If you don't mind, I'd like to sit in on your negotiation."

Mind ? Uh, no. Her wanting to join only showcased her interest.

"I don't mind at all." I smiled. "By the way, I saw you announced the next Game already online."

She inclined her head. "It's an annual event, so the Game will piggyback on the theme."

An annual masquerade ball? Sign me up! With the announcement, they'd posted a couple photos from last year, and everyone had been dressed to the nines. It took place the first weekend of May, so I was gonna make sure I had that Sunday off too.

"Would you like to attend with me?"

Yes! A thousand times yes!

"I'd love to." Gah, I wanted to bite her arm or something. Excitement bubbled up within me, and I couldn't wait to find out what it would feel like to be her submissive.

Hopefully, I'd get a taste of that before the next Game. Today was Wednesday, and my schedule was wide open.

Before heading out to Mclean, Penelope proposed dinner, so we went to a Mexican place not far from where I lived. They had awesome queso, which really said a lot about a Mexican restaurant.

Once we'd ordered, my phone dinged with a message, and the designated tone let me know it was a certain group chat. But it would have to wait. I'd see Macklin and some of the others in an hour or so. He was the leader of this brat chat pack.

I put my phone on silent instead, and Penelope smiled and grabbed my hand on the table.

That gesture did something to me. As if I'd been floating in space before, she reeled me in and made me focus on my surroundings and on her. This was a date, wasn't it? The tables did have tealights and white tablecloths to go with the multicolored cantina atmosphere. And everybody knew that candles and tablecloths meant date. Right?

"Did Master Lucian really send someone to assemble your furniture?" I asked.

She chuckled and nodded once. "Yup. They showed up bright and early on Monday. Two guys—they looked kinda lost on the property."

I grinned. Well, aside from one of two features, nobody could guess it was a kink place from the outside.

Our sodas arrived, along with a basket of chips, salsa, and queso, and my stomach snarled with want.

"It feels nice to have the bed upstairs again," she said, dragging a chip through the salsa. "And I can eat at a table instead of sitting on a mattress or a moving box."

That was my everyday life, sans moving boxes. "You should see my place. My roommates are musicians, so our tiny kitchen is their storage space for instruments. Thankfully, I have my own room—they share. There isn't much of a living room either."

"Have you lived there long?"

"About two years," I said, thinking back. "I returned home to Sweden for uni studies, and when I graduated, I was like, I can't live with my parents again." I chuckled and grabbed a couple chips. "Mom didn't get it. She was all, you have more space in your old room, and you wouldn't have to pay rent. And Dad kinda nudged her and was like, honey, she wants privacy. She'd rather pay rent and live in a dump than have us breathing down her neck."

Penelope laughed. "I was the same way, except I had less of a choice. My dad didn't understand why I didn't move back to LA after I graduated. He kept saying I'd have less pressure if I stayed at home—I wouldn't have to rush to find a job I wasn't happy with—but…" She shrugged. "I'd found my home out here. And when you're young, it's okay to have two or three roommates and virtually no money because you're free . Just…wait a few years, and you'll start thinking it wouldn't have been so bad to live with your parents."

I snickered. Maybe she was right; maybe she wasn't. It wasn't like I enjoyed the no-money part, but yeah. I loved having my mother across town.

"I don't know. I love my mom, and we have a great relationship, but it's nice to have a Metro ride between us," I said. "I hope…" Oh shit. I swallowed, and I accidentally forced down a piece of chip that was a size too large. Fuck. Ouch. Ohhh, the pain I put myself through in order not to say too much. I'd almost said I hoped Penelope wanted to meet my parents soon.

Yikes.

"Are you okay?" She was one part concerned and one part amused.

I coughed and guzzled my Sprite. "Dandy," I croaked. And then I was always going to be me, and I found a way to say too much anyway. "I almost brought up meeting the parents with a woman who's sworn off relationships, and now I'm paying for it."

I rubbed my chest as the chip finally went down.

Penelope turned pensive, and the amusement softened in her eyes. "I'm going to try to be as honest as you are—because it's very refreshing." She paused, and I felt myself hold my breath. "I recently spent ten years with someone I thought I was going to grow old with," she started by saying. "When that didn't happen, I…I felt lost. And I still do, to a degree. I fell out of love with her, and it made me see all the flaws in our dynamic. I realized how the last few years had blinded me. I didn't see my own unhappiness."

I exhaled unsteadily.

"I'm not blind any longer, though." She reached for my hand on the table again and linked our fingers together. "Even though it's too soon for me to hope and have expectations, I recognize a forever-kind of girl when I see one, and I can't be a for-the-night partner with her. I have to give her an honest chance. For her sake and mine."

Herrej?vlagud, jag tror jag ?lskar dig redan.

What did I say to that? How could I respond without it sounding super lame?

Heat bled onto my cheeks, and I swallowed hard.

"What, um…what makes you think I'm a forever-kind of girl?" I asked.

She smiled. "When I met Ella, I got swept away in a whirlwind that took me months to recover from—and in retrospect, I overlooked some things I shouldn't have. With you, I don't need or want the whirlwind. I think about you day and night, regardless. And I want to know everything about you. You're stuck in my head like the most annoying song."

She smirked to show she was teasing, and I felt so relieved. I needed that pressure release, mostly because I couldn't form a coherent response, given the gravity of what she'd shared.

But man, did I light up like a Christmas tree. "You better learn the lyrics, Ma'am, 'cause I'm not going anywhere."

She grinned and squeezed my hand. "Good. Just be patient with me. I'm not used to being rattled."

"Do I rattle you?" I didn't know why that made me smug.

"Girl, where do I begin," she laughed.

Right here. This was our beginning. I could feel it. She was going to give us a chance.

A couple hours later, we were a world away, enjoying the last of the sunlight by the pool in Mclean. Penelope kept her hands to herself, for the most part, but she sure didn't mind my going topless.

We shared a lounger, we shared a private little bubble, and we shared a drink.

"Gorgeous…" She dipped down and kissed my jaw, and I sighed contentedly and stretched out alongside her.

We didn't have to talk much for me to know she was processing a lot. I caught her looking at me often, and I could tell she was living in her head tonight. And I couldn't blame her. Maybe I wasn't bringing a whirlwind into a future dynamic we might share, but I'd heard more than once that I could be a whirlwind all on my own.

"May I ask what you're thinking about?" I asked.

She released a breath and caught a piece of my hair between her fingers. "Just…how you stormed into my life."

Case in point. Storm, whirlwind, same thing.

"You've forced me to reconsider some things," she murmured. "In a good way."

I bit my lip, hesitating for a quick beat. "As long as I don't overwhelm you. I've heard I can be…too much."

She knitted her brows together and shook her head. "No. Think it of like the worst ringtone imaginable to wake up to, but the moment you wake up, you remember you're going on a vacation."

I exhaled a laugh, unsure that was a good thing. Even if I was off on an adventure I'd been looking forward to, I wanted to wake up without an alarm!

"Well, aren't you two fuckin' cute," a very male voice said, bursting our bubble. It was Reese—I was fairly certain. Yeah, it had to be him. With the Tenley twins, you had to look at their tattoos to make sure.

He shed his tee and tossed it on a lounger, and it was followed by his trunks.

Penelope and I had gotten a glorious half hour all to ourselves.

"Always so naked," Penelope said in response.

"Pffft, fuck that." Reese gestured at me. "I have Nora on my side now. I don't wanna hear shit about how little I wear."

I smirked. "I'm gonna ride on a myth and claim I'm European, so that's my topless excuse."

He didn't miss a beat. "I'm Southern. We need signs to tell us to wear shirts and shoes."

I cracked up. He had a point!

Penelope's shoulders shook with her silent laughter.

Reese dove into the pool at the same time as River and Shay emerged from their cabin, carrying towels and wearing trunks.

"Hi, Shay." I waved. "Hello, Sir."

River nodded once. "Evenin'."

"Hey." Shay walked over to us and lifted a brow at me. "Did you see the latest post from that weird account?"

I sat up instantly. "No—when was it? I checked it this morning."

"Yeah, they posted about an hour ago," he replied.

Oh my God, I had to check. I reached for my phone, and in my periphery, I noticed more people arriving. Two people I didn't recognize, plus Gretchen. The latest addition to my friends list online. Like Nathan, she had reached out to me after I'd safeworded at their station, and I couldn't really get past how compassionate they were here. Nathan had texted me both the same evening after the event and then the morning after too. Just to check in and make sure I was okay.

I exchanged a quick hello with Gretchen before she ducked into the club area, and then I went to my Mclean app to look up this new @OverheardMclean account.

For the past few days, someone had been posting things they'd "overheard" out here, kind of like the accounts dedicated to major cities on Instagram. Followers could send in quotes and conversations they'd heard, and the account posted them.

"I'm wondering if it's Tate," Shay said.

I didn't know Tate well enough.

I scrolled till I saw the post.

Bottom: I'm just saying, you should watch yourself, Sir.

Top: When I do, people call me vain. Make up your mind.

Bottom: Ugh, you know what I mean!

"Who's being quoted?" I glanced up at Shay.

"Noa and Lucian," he replied. "Thing is, I was there when this happened the other day, and the only one who could've sent that in—aside from Noa and Lucian—is Kit. Which means we have both Tops and bottoms submitting quotes. It's gonna be impossible to figure out who's behind it."

The plot thickens…

I did know Penelope had sent in something that Reese had said.

"So we can rule out that it's a brat versus Sadist thing," I deduced.

Shay nodded.

I saw Reese swimming closer. "Y'all talkin' about the gossip account? I'm still gonna make you pay, Pen."

Pen snickered and took a swig from our drink. "Come on—it's fun! You're so quotable."

River snorted under his breath, having sat down a couple loungers over with a book.

My attention shifted when I spotted Macklin and his Owner arriving, and I alerted Shay. It was our cue. We had business to tend to now!

"I'll be back in a bit." I kissed Penelope's cheek, then reached for my tank top.

"And where are you off to?" Reese eyed both Shay and me.

Shay responded. "Macklin's gonna give us pointers on how to be good slaves for the Game."

He was such a good liar.

"Come on, my pretty little pets!" Macklin called from the other side of the pool. "Let me see what I have to work with."

He and Shay must've agreed on our cover beforehand.

"If you break my boy, I expect a new one," Reese told Macklin.

"Thanks, Daddy," Shay said dryly.

I snickered and followed him around the pool.

This was going to be fun!

But brat business aside, it wouldn't hurt me to ask Macklin for slave pointers. It was gonna be a popular event. Over twenty couples had signed up, and I had a competitive streak.

"Make yourself comfortable…"

Um, could I move in? Because that would be comfortable.

While Penelope was in the bathroom, I wandered around her little cabin and couldn't stop staring. It was so beautiful with all the new furniture and decorations. Super cozy. Warm colors, low lighting, a very comfy-looking couch, thick rug, round kitchen table that seated four, and potted plants in every nook and cranny.

I could honestly live here.

It just felt like a 100% stress-free environment. In fact, I yawned when I plopped down on the couch. And the couch tried to swallow me up.

I should've changed into PJs right away, because I wasn't sure I could get out of this thing.

Leaning back against the cushions, I eyed the black-and-white photos on the wall across the room, and it was easy to see the love Penelope had for this community. There was one picture that brought an instant smile to my face. Greer had thrown Penelope over his shoulder, and he was sprinting toward the pool. Their faces were frozen in laughter—possibly some screaming from Penelope too.

Another photo was of her and Macklin grinning and eating something. Like a pastry, maybe? They had whipped cream or frosting everywhere.

Colt and Lucas leaning close to each other with a fire running in the background, private smiles on their faces. Colt and River working up a sweat with shovels and—oh, it had to be from back when they built the deck. I spotted stacks with floorboards behind them, and the deck area was cleared. Reese and Greer were measuring something for the cabins in one photo too. Lucian had his brows knitted in concentration, and he was holding a clipboard and a calculator. He was casually dressed, which was rare for him. He looked a bit younger in that picture.

This was Penelope's Founders wall. Community history.

I wanted so badly for Mclean to be my new kinky home.

I heard the toilet flush and the water run, and the latter went on for a while. I didn't know her plans, though I'd gotten the impression we weren't going to bed yet. It wasn't that late anyway. A little past eleven.

She'd been teasing me all evening too, so I needed me some action!

Eventually, the door opened, and I nearly swallowed my tongue.

Um, hi. May I serve you forever?

Funny how quickly I could suddenly get off the couch.

I didn't know what to do or say; I just stared at her exquisite body, the lace thong she wore, the matching bra, all black… Her hair was down too. Thick, wavy, auburn. Fuck me sideways, this was porn.

She smirked faintly and nodded up the stairs. "You ready to head up?"

"I'm ready to do whatever you want, Ma'am."

She chuckled and extended her hand to me. "Let's go, then. We need to have a talk, and I'd like to do that my way."

Talk? With words?

We'd see if I could form anything coherent.

I walked over to her and slipped my hand into hers, and she led the way up, which put her delectable ass in my line of sight.

It was so bitable!

"Are you okay with me blindfolding you?" she asked.

No. Not at all. But only because I wanted to stare at her forever.

"If you wish to rob me of my view, yes, I suppose."

She exhaled a laugh. "You're wonderful for my ego, pet."

I was only speaking the truth.

Reaching the landing, I was once again taken aback by the warm and cozy design of the place. Maybe not taken aback, but it brought me down from my lacy-thong high, and I was catapulted into a space that was all about fluffy pillows, dimmed lighting, and what looked like the most comfortable bed ever. Aside from two nightstands and a dresser—never mind, a chair in the corner too… That was all, though.

She turned around and kissed my cheek. "Lie down on your back at the center of the bed, please."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"And strip down…"

I shivered. "Yes, Ma'am."

I did as told and discarded my top and shorts on the nearest nightstand, and then I crawled up on the bed. Oh my God, super-soft heaven, I'm here . How could anyone be nervous here? Because I was waiting for the nerves to set in, like they often did when I faced a Domme I liked. And this one was so many levels above like that it wasn't even funny. Yet, zero nerves. It was strange .

Okay, one thing did it. Or two. My stomach tightened a little, and a flurry of anticipation butterflies surged through me when I spotted Penelope digging two pairs of cuffs from a drawer, and a second later, I saw the metal hooks in the bed frame. Solid wood.

"Standard safewords apply," she said, holding up the cuffs in silent question.

I swallowed. "Green. Very green."

"Excellent." She smiled and walked toward me, and I lay down on my back. "I'm going to encourage you to speak freely tonight. No speech restrictions, no rules about when you get off, when you can moan, or if you beg for more."

"Understood."

I sucked in a breath as she straddled my hips and leaned over me.

"Close your eyes," she whispered.

I swallowed and closed my eyes. Okay, the nerves were settling in. Like a buzz running through me, making me wanna squirm and ask what her plans were.

She blindfolded me first with a silky black thing.

"The topic we're going to discuss is my sexuality."

Wait, what? I blinked instinctively, and that didn't work very well behind the fabric.

"What do you mean, Ma'am?"

"I'll explain." A beat later, her lips were on mine for a brief second, before she handcuffed me to the bed. Arms out, metal closing with a snick-snick-snick . "Not too tight?"

"No, Ma'am."

What did she mean by her sexuality?

I'd wondered not too long ago if she was bi, considering she'd carried on kink dynamics with at least one man, though those had been nonsexual. Either way, I couldn't say it would require any lengthy discussion. She could just tell me, and I'd be fine. But hey, if she needed to talk, so be it.

"I suppose I should start by saying that sex and what stimulates me are different," she admitted. "This right here…? Having you under me, at my mercy, is my sex. Controlling you, pushing you between states of pain and bliss, is my orgasm. It's what releases endorphins in my brain, and it's what gives me pleasure."

Oh. Huh. So she was on the ace spectrum?

"You're asexual?" I guessed.

"Not quite," she said. "It can be argued that I'm on that spectrum, but I'm not good with labels. My sex drive, for what's considered conventional, is low." She started running her hands up and down my body, testing sensitive spots and where I might be ticklish. "I still feel sexual attraction, I get aroused, and I love to get my sub off. I want to be in sexual situations frequently—but this is how I get off."

"By being in charge."

"By being in charge," she confirmed.

I flinched, and a giggle burst out of me when she reached my rib cage. I couldn't help it!

"So, um—" I squirmed and tried to shy away from her fingers. "You never come? Like, a regular orgasm?"

"No, I do. It's just not very often." She slid farther down my body until she planted her knees between my legs and parted them. "How often would you say you come? On your own, with a partner, doesn't matter."

I hummed, thinking about it, but her hands were distracting. She rubbed my thighs so sensually that it was tough to focus. Unhurried movements, fingers inching closer inward…

"I don't know, maybe three or four times a week…?" I bit my lip. "Sometimes five, sometimes every day, sometimes I can go a week or two without."

She acknowledged me with a hum of her own, and then she pulled up my knees so my feet were planted firmly on the duvet.

"I might average one a month, but like you, I go through periods when it's more and sometimes less."

Oh. All right. The tension between us felt a little off, and I wasn't sure if she was waiting for me to throw a fit or tell her this wouldn't be working for me. I'd lusted after Penelope Darling for so long, almost…two years? Something like that? And maybe lusted was a strong word. I'd had girlfriends and playtime arrangements in that time, but I'd admired her for that long anyway. I'd sought her out online to get a dose of her opinions. I'd read every journal entry she'd posted, and I'd made sure to catch every seminar or demo she'd hosted outside of Mclean.

Getting her off wasn't precisely a deal-breaker.

"The question now is…" Fuck, she dropped low, and I felt the softest kiss at the top of my pussy. "Is this okay with you, Nora?"

I presumed she was asking about the orgasm and sex stuff, not what she was currently derailing my thoughts with.

I took a steadying breath and realized I'd been clenching my fists.

Relax. Deep breaths.

"I have two rules," I said. "I'm monogamous for intimacy and sexual play, and I'm only drawn to women who are dominant. Everything else is just details. My dream to serve you is about accommodating your needs, not my projection of what they might be. It's about making you happy, whether that body worship includes orgasms or massages."

It just wasn't a big deal to me. It might be to some…? But my own pleasure was mainly derived from servitude, not how many times I could get my Top off.

Penelope let out a breath and dropped a kiss along the inside of my thigh.

Maybe she wasn't ready to say anything. Maybe she was processing.

One thing— oh my fuck —she was ready for…was to go down on me. I sucked in a breath and tensed up, and she kept kissing me, only now she was right where I wanted her. But man, she had all the patience. Soft kisses, wet kisses, firm ones…where she delved deeper with her tongue, and I was squirming again.

"Fuck," I exhaled.

"My girl will always keep herself smooth for me," she murmured. "So that I can see her marks and bruises."

Your girl.

"Yes, Ma'am." I bit back a moan as she slid a finger deep inside me, quickly followed by a second, and I arched my back. "May I see you, please?"

"Not yet. This is for me."

Oh God.

I grabbed on to the chains of the cuffs so I didn't hurt my wrists when I pulled and writhed, because that was clearly where I was heading. She kissed me, fingered me, and licked me as if her goal was for me to lose my mind.

Then she pinched my clit, and I nearly arched off the bed. I gasped loudly and felt the pain shooting through me, intensifying the pleasure.

"I'm going to have so much fun with you, sugar," she told me.

A resounding smack sounded through the loft, and the air was sucked out of my lungs. Pussy spanking, check! Fuck, fuck, fuck, she was relentless all of a sudden. Her hand came down over and over, until she switched things up with her soft tongue and perfect fingers. Then back to spanking me.

I moaned and whimpered, and the pressure started building up rapidly. The wetter I got, the more the impact sounded—and felt. Sharp pains. Heat. Fucking fire. And I got it. Like servitude was my crack, control was hers, and she played me like a damn fiddle.

She fucked with my head too when she sucked on my clit and squeezed the insides of my thighs so hard that her nails were going to leave a mark. I choked on a gasp, and I wanted to scream as much as I wanted to moan.

"Fuck!" I cried out instead.

"You're going to bruise beautifully, pet."

Yeah, my pale ass had heard that before. I whimpered as my eyes burned behind the blindfold, and I started panting like a madwoman.

She hummed against my flesh and pushed me closer and closer toward the cliff. The pain faded, and she finger-fucked me faster, each movement causing slick sounds that filled the air. Along with my heavy breathing. All of it brought me under. I went from knowing that I was getting closer slowly to…holy fuck, I was right there. Drowning in pleasure. I sucked in a final breath and held it, and I tensed up so hard that I trembled. My muscles protested. Sweat beaded on my face.

I was so gone.

I imploded and couldn't make a single sound, and she kept working me. She fucking controlled my orgasm too. How was that even possible? She increased every ounce of attention that got me off and kept the pain at the perfect level where it just fueled the bliss. Her mouth and tongue never left my clit, but her fingers pinched, and her hands spanked and squeezed.

The faintest whimper left me in the end, allowing me to draw a ragged breath, and she brought me down slowly. Squeezing turned into gentle rubbing, and I shook and shuddered.

Sweet Jesus, I wasn't sure I could walk now if she asked me to. My whole body felt like jelly. It was part of the mattress now. A permanent bed feature. Thank you and goodbye. Lights out.

Penelope kissed her way up my body. I was busy panting.

She released me from the cuffs, causing my arms to flop down, and removed the blindfold. A chill hit my face. That felt nice. Okay, I just had to breathe. Breathe and get my heart rate down.

I exhaled and blinked drowsily.

She smiled down at me, and I wanted to…

"I wanna pull you down on me, but I can't lift my arms," I croaked.

She chuckled softly and kissed my nose. "Good thing you don't have to move a muscle for a while. I was thinking I'd get us some drinks and snacks?"

Oh yum.

"I love your post-sex plan," I said.

"And I…" Her gaze grew gentle, and her smile was filled with warmth. "I love what you said earlier. It means a lot to me."

I understood what she was referring to, but she had no reason to thank me. I was here for her, no matter what that entailed.

The following day, I was on my own for a while. Penelope and the other organizers of the event got together to hammer out more details, so no bottoms were allowed near the cabin where they sat.

I did absolutely nothing useful, except catch myself staring at Penelope.

Last night…had changed something.

She'd never uttered the words you're mine or anything like it, but I'd felt it in her touches, in how she'd completely possessed my mind and body. And how she'd opened up too, about her sexuality. She was entrusting me with that, and it brought us closer.

Around noon, Shay, Camden, and I had pizza delivered, and we got comfortable on the deck after fetching cold drinks and napkins.

Camden was cute. He couldn't sit still to save his life, and he was clearly deep into his regression as a Little. He kept talking about how his Daddy was gonna be here soon, and he'd waited forever—as in, forty-eight hours. Said Daddy, Anthony, was a music teacher in New York, so they had an interesting schedule. It was a private academy that allowed for flexibility, partly because Anthony actually ran the whole thing, but they traveled back and forth a whole lot between Nashville and New York—and now DC too, where August was establishing a headquarters of some sort.

"We're going back to Nashville in two weeks," Camden went on frankly, despite that no one had prompted a conversation. "I miss all my stuffies, but at the same time, it gives me an excuse to buy more here and in New York. You know?"

Shay and I exchanged a grin.

"Oh, this is so delicious," Camden gushed around a mouthful of pizza. "Mm-mm- mm !"

He wasn't wrong. Domino's for the win. Besides, it was one of the few takeout joints that promised the food was still hot upon delivery. Ordering a burger and fries from somewhere just made you disappointed. Then you sat there with your cold, limp fries.

"I don't think you understand what a treat this is," Camden said. "Daddy hates takeout. August, that is. It's usually something Anthony and I sneak around with."

I chuckled and bit into my slice of cheesy goodness.

Halfway through lunch, someone showed up with a carrier—one of those used for cats and small dogs—and the woman was definitely here for Penelope. Because she rushed over to greet the woman with a bright smile.

Then Penelope bent down to peer into the carrier. "Oh, he's adorable, Sierra. Nora, get over here, please."

Yes, Ma'am!

I wiped my fingers and scurried over there.

"You'll have to make sure I bought all the right things," Penelope told Sierra. "I almost gave myself a headache trying to figure out what litter was the best."

Sierra chuckled. "I'm sure it's fine, Ma'am. Mistress wrote you a helpful list too, and I brought food for a week, plus a baby blanket that smells of home."

Penelope extended her hand to me, and I was happy to thread our fingers together.

"Nora, I want you to meet Sierra. She and her Mistress have helped me find the perfect early birthday present for Ash. Sierra, this is Nora, a hotheaded obsession of mine."

Hotheaded obsession, huh?

I wanted that on a business card. Hotheaded Obsession of Mistress Penelope.

"The obsession is mutual, and it's nice to meet you, Sierra." I reached out and shook her hand.

"You too, Nora."

It was my turn to peer down into the carrier, and my heart about jumped with the adorableness. Oh my gosh, the kitten was so cute! And tiny! Gray and stripey, with a white belly. Blue eyes.

"Oh, I want one." I pouted. "Is it a boy or a girl?"

"A boy," Sierra confirmed. "He turns ten weeks today, actually."

I sighed and straightened up. "One day… One day, I want a house with a big backyard and all the animals."

I caught Penelope's curious expression in the corner of my eye, and she could file away that little tidbit of Future Nora.

Some ten minutes before Ash was due, I had ants in my pants!

I hadn't left the floor of Penelope's cabin since we'd let little Paws loose. It was the name I'd chosen for the wild sprite, but I could pretend to be understanding if Ash wanted to change it.

"At the same time, he needs to realize it's the perfect name," I said matter-of-factly.

Penelope laughed as she finished setting the table. "Would you say kittens trump lizards?"

Oh. Hmm. "I'd say they don't really compare. I can't cuddle with a lizard the way I can with a kitten." Not that Paws was in a cuddle mood either. He was currently rolling himself over my leg while I leaned back against the couch. "Lane and Ty have invited me down to their place in Florida, and if all goes well, maybe I'll bring a Mistress, and we can chase lizards and snakes together."

She didn't even hesitate with her answer. "I'm afraid your future Mistress will leave the reptile-chasing to her girl because the Mistress prefers furry animals."

Unbridled excitement tore through me, and I lifted Paws off my leg before I rose to my feet and hurried over to her.

"You said future Mistress!"

She smiled and pulled me in close, right where I wanted to be. "Did I?"

"You totally did." I snaked my arms around her neck and brushed our noses together. "My hopes are high, just so you know."

I understood why she was careful. And maybe I was okay with her cautiousness because she wasn't difficult to read anymore. Her eyes seemed brighter, and she wasn't holding back as much.

She didn't say anything now either, and she didn't have to. She leaned in and kissed me instead, holding me tightly, speaking with her actions. She wanted to hope, and that was enough for now.

I deepened the kiss, tasting her on my tongue, and I eased my fingers up into her soft waves.

She always smelled so damn amazing, like some kind of flowers—never too sweet, more fresh and just…perfect.

She slowed down the kiss and squeezed my butt through my shorts, until she took a breath and rested our foreheads together.

I cupped her face in my hands and ghosted my thumbs over her freckled skin.

"I wanted to ask you something earlier." She averted her gaze to my shoulder and slipped her hands beneath the waistband of my shorts. "In that house with the big backyard and all the animals, are there kids too?"

Welp .

It wasn't a shock, at the same time as it was. Dating women who were older than me had taught me a thing or two, and this question tended to come up earlier.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "I don't want to claim I'm too young to have made up my mind, but I'm not in any camp yet, so to speak. I can say I'm not ready right now, all while sometimes saying stuff like, when I have kids … Kinda like that."

The corner of her mouth turned up a fraction. "Good answer."

"Yeah?"

She nodded and met my gaze again. "I was the same when I was your age. Then—nothing. Ella didn't want children, and the notion wasn't high up on my list either. But…being almost forty and starting fresh…" She winced. "I admit, I don't want the door to be firmly shut."

My stomach tightened with nerves in the best fucking way, because things were suddenly real. Maybe she didn't dare hold out a lot of hope yet, but she was definitely gearing up for it. Otherwise, she'd never bring this up.

"It's far from shut." I kissed her again and mirrored her smile?—

Goddammit! Two loud knocks on the door let us know dinner was here. And Ash.

"We'll talk more later." She gave me a quick smooch before she went to open the door.

I blew out a breath and instinctively sought out Paws so he wouldn't escape.

Penelope opened the door. "Nora, can you grab my wallet? I gotta tip the delivery man."

"You're funny. You're so funny that I can't stop laughing." Ash strode in, seemingly always wearing his work clothes, and dropped a kiss to the top of Penelope's head. "Interestin' venue change for dinner, by the way." He nodded at me and smirked lazily. "Daughter."

I gigglesnorted. "Hey, Dad."

"Uhhh…" Penelope lifted her brows.

So I had to explain. "I texted him the other night at, like, eleven…? And he was like, go to bed, kid, it's late."

"So she called me Dad and told me to mind my own bedtime," Ash finished.

Damn right!

"Well, all right, then," Penelope said, closing the door. "Mildly disturbing I'm dating your child, but…"

Ash set the takeout bag on the table. "Oh good, so it's official. I was waiting for you to pull your head outta your ass."

"Is that how you speak to your daughter-in-law?" Penelope challenged.

Ash stood straighter and cocked a brow. "Is that how you speak to your father-in-law?"

"This is fun ." I grinned. But also, I was hungry for Chinese food, so I took my seat at the table and waited for their little staredown to end. "Are you gonna eat or what? And how much do I owe you, Sir?"

That seemed to break the playful pissing contest, and Ash huffed and sat down across from me. "Owe me for what?"

"Uh, the food?"

He looked at me like I'd grown a second head.

"She's young, Ash," was Penelope's explanation. "They're always Venmoing each other for something."

Ash nodded once as he dug out a bunch of containers. "I'm not unfamiliar with it. I Venmo my kids money all the fuckin' time. Gas this, makeup that—oh, but all my friends are getting it, Daddy! Why can't I?" His mimicking what I presumed was his daughter's voice was hysterical.

I figured it was best to stay silent. He seemed to be in a ranty mood.

"Worst is when they ask for somethin' and haven't done their chores yet, and I gotta reason with the little fuckers," he muttered. "Have kids. Don't have teenagers. I'm half kidding. I love my babies. Even when they're terrors."

Penelope laughed and went behind me, and I realized she was picking up Paws. Ash hadn't noticed the rascal.

"Maybe the kids will do their chores if they can play with your birthday present afterward?" she suggested.

"Huh?" Ash stopped unpacking his chopsticks and looked up.

I beamed as Penelope brought the little kitten over to him.

"I know it's early, but happy forty-sixth, friend. Nora named him Paws."

"Which you can obviously change," I added quickly. "If you insist."

A dozen different emotions flitted past in Ash's expression, from confusion and disbelief to wonder and however I would categorize "look how fucking cute that thing is."

Then he exhaled a laugh and accepted the kitten. "Get outta town. Are you serious?"

"Of course." Penelope touched his scruffy cheek, and we kind of lost Ash for a moment.

"Look at you…" He nuzzled Paws's face and seemed immediately smitten. "You comin' home with me, little guy? Huh? Fuckin' hell, he's cute. Yeah, you are." Not to mention lively. Paws was all paws and curiosity. "I bet those baby teeth hurt like hell."

I cleared my throat and scooped some rice onto my plate. "And the claws…" I had some scratches on my arm already.

"That's okay. I like 'em feisty," Ash murmured.

Penelope and I smiled at each other. Safe to say, she'd scored a home run with that present.

"I've taken care of all the kitty accessories too," she added. "He has a litter box, some toys, food…oh, and I got a carrier."

"You're goddamn amazin', sweetheart." Ash leaned over and kissed Penelope's cheek. "Thank you." He returned his attention to Paws and smiled. "And you're not allowed to leave me. That's not how this works. No, you gotta love me forever."

Yikes .

Someone should text Nathan…

It took Ash a while to refocus, but when we were almost done eating, he managed to set Paws down on the floor.

Paws was keeping his name, Ash had announced, but his kids might pick a middle name.

I was very okay with that.

As I munched on just one more eggroll, Ash pulled out a tiny notepad from one of the side pockets in his pants, followed by a short pencil I hadn't even seen he'd kept behind his ear.

"Before we begin," he said, grabbing a fried shrimp, "is Penelope joining as your Owner, girlfriend, or both?"

Ummm…

I glanced at Penelope.

She smirked a little. "I'm a protective observer trying to get to know her girl better. I'm here to gather information."

Oof, I really liked that answer. Every now and then, she served me with a reminder that she was a Predator, and I couldn't wait to play with that side of her.

"Copy that," Ash replied. "So, since the last time we spoke, they've announced the names on the four stations at the event. Serve Your Owner, Suffer for Your Owner, Treat Your Owner, and Pose for Your Owner." He'd written them down on his pad, and he circled the second one. "We haven't discussed pain. Frankly, I thought it was gonna be straight-up servitude, but given that Reese and Pen are two of the organizers, I shoulda seen the sadism comin'."

Penelope grinned wickedly.

Hot.

Ash turned to her. "I don't suppose you'll give us more than that? From previous years' experience, you'd've sent out additional information for the Tops by now."

She straightened in her seat and cleared her throat. "Not this time. The focus is on how well you know your partner—and with that in mind, with less info, it's safe to assume the pain play won't be advanced."

"Fair enough." Ash nodded with a dip of his chin and shifted his gaze to me. "You've already told me you have no issues safewording, so we'll?—"

"With the exception that she gets apologetic," Penelope stated.

Nuh-uh!

Ash furrowed his brow. "Why would you get apologetic—and was this at the event last week? I heard Colt mention you safeworded but everythin' worked out. I forgot to ask you about it."

"It wasn't a big deal," I insisted. "I can understand why I'd come off as apologetic because I kept saying I was sorry, but I was more bummed out for cutting the scene short. I was having fun—I didn't want it to be over. So it wasn't like I felt bad for messing up or anything like that. And I didn't hesitate to call red either. I felt the rope tighten around me when I slipped down the wall, and the moment I started panicking, I safeworded."

"Rope…" Ash bobbed his head and scratched his eyebrow. "You were with Nathan?"

Shit. I nodded once.

So did he, and he cleared his throat and doodled another circle on his notepad. "I can deal with you slinging out you're sorry like a Canadian, as long as you don't hesitate for a second to safeword at any time. Standard color-system for safewords applies at events, and if you're unable to speak, you will either have a safeword ball that you squeeze, or I'll be close enough that you can pinch me. I don't care how many times you do it, if you pinch, I'll treat it as red."

That worked great for me. "I solemnly swear to safeword without a moment's hesitation," I promised. "Also, I'm a little curious about where you draw the line before it's advanced pain play. Like, harder beatings…?" I grinned.

Penelope chuckled. "It's more about being able to anticipate it. Primal play, for instance, is advanced play because it's driven by fear. When a Predator hunts you down, you don't always see the next strike coming. What we're saying about the level of pain for the Game is that you won't be blindsided. If the pain becomes too much, you'll be able to call yellow or red without shock running through your system."

Ah, made sense. It was reassuring too. "Okay, got it. Plenty of room to react. But just so we're clear, I love both fear-laden pain and receiving it for the sake of releasing pressure within me, so I doubt it's an area I'll safeword. I can take a lot of it too."

"Shit goes wrong all the time, hon—that's all," Ash explained patiently. "No matter how high your tolerance is, dozens of factors can cause somethin' to go sideways. So I need you to keep that in mind."

"Yes, Sir."

"Good. As for your reactions to receiving pain," he went on. "Are you a screamer, a bratty little shit who'll curse me out, do you get euphoric, do you moan, gasp, get excited…? Tell me what I can expect from your sounds and body language. Oh, and—" He faced Penelope. "With the protective observer's permission, I'd like to give her a beating before the event so I can pick up cues easier."

Uh-oh!

Penelope's sadistic little smirk said it all. "I have time right now. Why don't we torture her together in the club?"

Ash turned wolfish, and both looked at me.

Gulp.