15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

Mickey was cleaning up the feed room at the Circle C in preparation for the weekend festivities when he heard a whistle in the hallway. He stepped out to see Ethan Sachs saunter toward him with a bright, welcoming grin. Mickey returned it, happy to see his friend again. The nerves set in shortly thereafter as he remembered what had caused the estrangement in the first place—an ill-timed, poorly thought-out, kiss.

"Ethan, dude, it's good to see you. How's the graduate? I didn't know you were able to graduate a year early until Tim told me about it." Mickey shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans so as not to touch the kid and possibly freak him out.

Ethan Sachs was a handsome guy, and he'd grown a few inches since the last time Mickey had seen him, or so it seemed. When Heath walked in behind him, Mickey really started to worry and took a second to contemplate how quickly he could outrun a bullet.

"You coulda come to the party, ya know," Heath told him. Mickey was totally confused, so he froze on the spot.

Ethan looked over his shoulder and chuckled. "Daddy, that ain't gonna put him at ease. He already thinks I'm a lovesick stalker. Leave him alone."

Mickey chuckled nervously. "Naw, kid, I never thought you was a stalker. It was my fault for—"

"Mick, don't start. We just got caught up for ‘bout a hot minute and did a stupid thing, okay? Daddy freaked out when I told him I was gay, but he and Momma are gettin' used to the idea. Miss Katie says you won't come ‘round the Katydid cause you're afraid Daddy's gonna kick your ass. I'd like to work there, but I don't wanna make it so you don't come over to see Josh and Miss Katie." Ethan put his hands on his hips.

It wasn't a lie. Mickey was concerned Heath would kick his ass, and he knew he wouldn't fight back because he respected Heath Sachs too much to defend himself. It was unfortunate he'd kissed his son, but it was in the past.

The kid had graduated from high school a year early, and he seemed more mature than Mickey sometimes. It was time for Mickey to put the bad decision behind him because he missed everyone at the Katydid.

Mickey chuckled. "Yeah, you know that's true, but you go ahead and work at the Katydid. They'll need somebody with common sense since I left. I won't be a stranger, I swear." Mickey extended his hand for a shake. He then turned to look at Heath, his mentor since he started working at the Katydid before he moved to the Circle C.

"How ‘bout you, Heath? Can ya forgive me for puttin' a move on your son? I'm so fuckin' sorry I ever—" Heath Sachs stepped forward to pull him into a strong hug.

It took Mickey by surprise, but he was grateful. It seemed there were no hard feelings. "I'm sorry I didn't come ‘round sooner, but I guess I needed to cool off. Patsy and I needed to think things through after Ethan told us about himself.

"I think of ya like another son, Mick. I want ya to come back to the Katydid. That fuckin' Paulie…" Heath's complaint brought a laugh from Mickey and Ethan, who was standing off to the side, inspecting the saddles Mickey had resting on the stall doors.

Heath ranted about Paulie, the former hand at the Circle C who'd been traded to the Katydid in exchange for Mickey. As far as Mickey knew, Danny Johnson was happy about the trade because he didn't like Paulie in the least. Mickey could only imagine Heath's assessment of the situation.

"Well, I'm grateful for you missin' me, but I'm gonna stay right here, Heath. I loved bein' at the Katydid, but Tim, Matt, Ryan, and Rocky need me to keep 'em in line, and I feel it's my responsibility to take care of ‘em. Y'all are gonna come to the party this weekend to celebrate the guardianship and the birthdays, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it for anything. Whether anybody likes it, we're all becomin' a great big family, and those who aren't party to it are gonna be out in the cold. We come help y'all when it's time to move or ship cattle, and y'all come help us put up hay. Any of the hands who don't like it will probably leave, but that's just the way it is with cowboys. They get territorial over the stock they take care of and don't like anybody steppin' in to show 'em up, as you might remember. The only change we accept is when we decide to move on. You gonna move on, Mickey?" Heath gave him a serious stare.

Mickey couldn't help but chuckle as he removed the baseball cap and slapped it against his thigh to get rid of some of the sweat he'd worked up in the hot barn in July. "Naw, Heath. I'm not plannin' on goin' anywhere. I'm hopin' Matt and Tim let me keep takin' care of the horses here at the ranch for a long time to come. I mean, y'all have a lot of horse hands over at the Katydid, but ‘round here, the boys don't care much for horses till it's time to work cattle, then they get damn grateful."

Wheels on the pea gravel driveway that led to the barn caught everyone's attention. Mickey knew they were expecting a full complement of guests for the weekend, and he'd agreed to help Tim settle people at the house.

There were only a handful staying the weekend at the ranch, so he was surprised when Jonathon Wells pulled up in his fancy Mercedes. He hadn't been privy to the guest list, so he supposed he shouldn't be surprised Matt had invited the lawyer.

Mick turned to the Sachs' and took a deep breath. "I seriously hope you both forgive me for what I did, because I've missed bein' friends with both of ya."

As if on cue, Ethan walked up to Mickey and hugged him. "I love you, but I'm not in love with ya. I figured it out while I was with Uncle Teddy. He's gay, and we had more than one good talk about first crushes. I'm sorry if I caused ya trouble with all that bullshit, okay?

"Daddy stayed with me at the farm, and with Uncle Teddy's help, we worked shit out before we got home. He ain't happy his son's gay because he thinks I'm gonna have a hard life, and I hold no preconceived notions it won't be difficult, but I'm lucky. My parents are supportive and still love me. That's enough of a start," Ethan whispered to Mickey before he pulled away and smiled.

"Oh! Damn. I hope I'm not interrupting anything." The rich smooth voice was one Mickey had been longing to hear. The sound made his insides flip as he and Ethan broke apart.

When he turned toward the barn door, there stood Jon Wells with an expression that let Mickey know the man had some feelings he was still denying, based on the scowl. He hoped to fuck they could finally have a serious conversation and work some shit out.

"No, no. Come on in. Jonathon Wells, this is Heath Sachs and his son, Ethan. They both work at the Katydid for Josh, and we're all old friends. Guys this is Matt's attorney, Jonathon Wells." They all shook hands and exchanged greetings.

"Nice to meet ya."

"How ‘do."

"Pleasure to meet both of you. I've heard about you from Tim."

Mickey wasn't sure if that last part was right because he was pretty sure Tim didn't really talk to Jon Wells, but he'd let it slide.

"Well, we best get goin' to the house. Patsy makes us do dishes if we're late for supper. We'll see y'all tomorrow," Heath told them as he put his hand on Ethan's shoulder.

"Mick, I can come over early and bring a few horses if you think folks'll wanna ride. Call and let me know which ones you think would be best, since I don't know the guests." Ethan's bright smile put Mickey's heart at ease. He was glad to have been reunited with his young friend. He'd missed Ethan.

"I'll let ya know. Welcome home, kiddo." He hugged Ethan before the Sachs men left him alone in the barn with the lawyer.

As soon as they heard the truck start outside the barn, Jon walked over to the stall where Charlie was usually housed. "Where's the big guy?"

"Out on pasture. I just cleaned out his stall and hosed it down. It's hot as hell, so I'm gonna leave him out for the night. Josie's up at Jeri and Marty's in the pasture. She was in season, but she'll be fine by tomorrow. I'm gonna take Charlie up there in the mornin' and bring her home to use for the kids to ride. We've got some of Ryan and Rocky's school friends comin' for the party, along with a few friends of the family.

"It's best if Charlie's tucked away somewhere quiet. He's gonna be busy over the next few weeks." Mickey smirked as he thought about all the action the stud was set to get over the summer. Charlie had bred a few of Josh's mares earlier in the spring, and Josh was looking forward to the foals that would come the next spring. There had been several interested parties who'd contacted Matt on the website, and he knew Tim was looking into sending sperm out of state by some freezing technique. There was a lot happening at the Circle C.

"That's great. I guess you've been busy, huh? Too busy to answer a text?" Jon's accusatory comment and raised eyebrow had Mickey ready to hyperventilate.

Mickey chuckled, remembering the text from Jon which he found confusing as hell. Mickey was sure Audrey Langley had somehow ended up with Jon's phone and sent it as a lark. He wasn't about to be made to look like a fool three times by the same guy.

"Hey, you made it abundantly clear you were far too good for me. You're too smart, too classy, too good-lookin' and obviously, you have no desire to ever try an exclusive relationship, so I don't see why we need to prolong the agony."

Mickey held out his hands and shrugged. Time for some harsh truths.

"You wanna fuck? We can figure out a place, but not in Tim and Matt's house because it's a rule for them. Hell, we can fuck down here if you want. Then it's out of your system, and you can go find as much high-class, well-educated ass as suits you."

Mickey had been rehearsing that speech for weeks, sure he'd never get the chance to say it to anyone other than himself. He'd been sure he'd never see Jon again to tell him to his face.

When Jon bristled, Mickey truly had to wonder why. What had he said that would grate against the man's sensibilities? As far as Mickey could tell, any relationship the man was interested in having would last about as long as it took for him to blow his load in Mickey's mouth or his ass. Maybe if they did fuck, they could both get over it?

"That's not going to work for me, Mickey. I've thought about the two of us a lot since you brought Charlie to Dillwyn. I know I behaved like a real prick by leaving before we talked about things. I'm still trying to figure out why I acted that way. No, I know why I did. I was scared, Mickey. I've been afraid to let anyone get close to me because getting involved in a relationship brings a lot of responsibilities, and I didn't think I wanted anything to do with them.

"I went to my parents' place yesterday for lunch and finally told them I'm gay. Who the fuck knew they'd already guessed it? When Audrey came out, they decided to let me stew until I was finally forced to come clean with them. If it wasn't for you, I'd have likely gone on living the lie until Ham and Ally were old and gray."

Mickey couldn't help but laugh. "You're full-a-shit, Jonny. There's no way you knowin' me had anything to do—" Jon pulled him into his arms and sealed his mouth over Mickey's before the sentence was finished.

When the man's tongue slipped between Mickey's lips and grazed his teeth, the young cowboy couldn't help himself. He was in love with the man, as unlikely a pairing as they might be, but as Tim had told him, the heart wants what it wants.

The kiss became passionate, and Mickey could feel Jon's hard cock against his through the denim of their jeans. They were rutting against each other as the kisses continued, and Mickey felt himself about ready to shoot off.

He pulled back and looked into Jon's eyes, not moving his lower body from the feel of Jon's hardness. The heat between them was something Mickey yearned to feel, fighting the thought that it was yet another one-time-only situation. He quickly determined he was going to take it in stride and at least fulfill a fantasy before it was over.

"Should we take this aloft?" Mickey pointed to the ladder.

He watched as Jon closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. "No."

To say Mickey felt the sting of the word was a gross understatement. He worried if he'd used the word "aloft" wrong, but decided he'd used it in the proper context. Jon just didn't want anything to do with him, physically.

Mickey had been studying to take his GED, and he'd hoped he could impress Jon with all the new things he was learning since he was being tutored by Tim, during which Matt watched them and chuckled at their interaction.

"What the hell does that mean?" Mickey asked as Tim quizzed him on vocabulary words. They were in the kitchen at the Circle C, Mickey sautéing vegetables for dinner while Tim kept him company as he sat at the island.

"You've heard of prerequisites, right? Things that are necessary before... So, if they don't come before…" Tim was prodding.

Mickey appreciated his help, but sometimes, the younger cowboy felt like a moron, and he didn't appreciate his best friend seeing it live and in person. "I don't know why you bother, Timmy. I'm just a good ole boy. This is ridiculous. My folks never expected me to make anything of myself, and I don't know why you do." Mickey placed the spatula on the spoon rest and turned to face his friend.

Tim took a deep breath. "Okay, what does pre mean?"

"It means before." Mickey snapped at him, which surprised them both.

"Okay, what does prerequisites mean?"

"Things that are required before, okay?" Mickey roared loud enough to bring Rocky and Ryan out of the basement.

"What's wrong?" Ryan's face showed concern.

Tim laughed. "Nothing at all. I'm teaching Mickey some vocabulary words, and he's excited because he just learned a new one."

He then turned to Mickey and smiled. "So, requisite—use it in a sentence."

Mickey laughed. "In order to live at the Circle C, it is requisite that you bring your own dad-burn dictionary."

"Exactly!" Tim shut the book and turned on the radio. The four of them danced around the kitchen to Barron Shelton as a meatloaf cooked in the oven. It was great fun, sometimes, learning with Tim as his teacher.

Mickey swallowed, not sure what to say to the man standing in front of him. Hell, he wasn't sure why the jackass had shown up at the ranch anyway. No reason Mickey could figure. "What the fuck are ya even doin' here, Jon?"

Jon took a deep breath and exhaled as he grabbed Mickey's hand, pulling him closer. "I'm not interested in a quick romp in the hay as temptingly cliché as it might be. I want us to try to be more, Mickey. I know you're ten years younger than me, but I'll be damned if I can stop thinking about you. I'd like to talk to you about some changes I want to make, and I'd like to take you on an honest-to-God date. I can't get you out of my head, Cowboy, and I figure there must be a very good reason," Jon confessed.

Mickey took a minute to think about what he'd said because he didn't want to make a misstep with the man. He'd stewed over the other two times they'd been around each other and how horribly wrong it had gone. He didn't think it was his fault because the man had issues, to be sure, but was he ready for another go-round?

"Who's that?"

Jon and Mickey stood in the corner of the pool at Jeri and Marty's house. It was an adults-only party, and there were friends and family filling the backyard of the senior Collins' white clapboard home.

Since Jon wasn't familiar with most of the attendees, Mickey took it upon himself to give him the lay of the land—and provide the background information and gossip regarding those in attendance.

"That's Cecelia Blankenship, the boys' first-grade teacher. She was great with them, especially Rocky." Mickey tilted his head toward the woman sitting in a chair on the pool deck.

"Why especially Rocky?"

Mickey picked up his can of beer from the pool ledge and took a sip, not quite sure how to explain things since Jon had originally been Rocky's lawyer before he dumped the boy on his friend, Audrey.

"Rocky has some learning challenges, Jon. He and Ryan are in the same grade, and Miss Montgomery, a friend of Miss Blankenship's, will be their teacher next school term. They've been working together with the boys over the summer to keep Rocky on course. Ryan could skip a grade because he started a year behind, but he won't leave Rocky."

Mickey's voice was filled with pride for Ryan's accomplishments. Not only was he proud of Ryan for how smart the boy was, but he was also proud of how much Ryan worked to help Rocky catch up.

Jon seemed to bristle a little as he took a sip of his own beer. "So, Rocky needs special help? Why isn't Audrey getting a tutor to help him?"

Mickey chuckled. "Hang on, tiger. You walked away and made Audrey his lawyer. She's been great by seeing that Tim and Matt got guardianship of him, but as far as anything else? She's a lawyer, not a social worker. We're doin' our best."

Jon grabbed Mickey's hand and held it up, laughing at the pruney fingers. "Maybe we need to get out for a bit?"

"Sure. I need to go inside and check on the pork anyway. You think people are hungry yet?"

The two of them took in the attendees at the party, and Mickey was happy so many friends who were supportive of the family had shown up. It was truly a testament to the close-knit community.

Not everybody was on board with the fact there were several members of the community who were gay because they didn't understand LGBTQ+ people, but they didn't harass the family. They simply stayed away and allowed them to live their lives.

As they settled in the kitchen to put together the buffet, Mickey put Jon to chopping vegetables for a salad. Jon cleared his throat, so he turned in the man's direction. "I have a question, and I don't want you to take it the wrong way. Is there anything else you'd like to do with your life besides work here for Tim and Matt?" Jon's expression only showed curiosity.

Mickey swallowed before he opened the oven and pulled out a pork butt he'd had on the grill all afternoon, opting to bring it inside Jeri's house to finish cooking. He pulled out a taste and smiled before he poured the rest of the pineapple juice over it, along with the chunks of fruit he'd held in reserve.

"Funny you should ask." Mickey smiled. "I've been preparin' to take my GED ‘cause I dropped out of high school at sixteen. I wanna make somethin' better of my life, but I'm still tryin' to figure out what better is. I know horses, and I'm learnin' cattle, but I don't wanna be a vagabond cowboy my whole life. I'd like to settle down and think about maybe havin' kids. Livin' here has made me see it's a possibility.

"I might like to take some business classes or somethin', but I haven't made any concrete decisions yet. I'd like to have somethin' of my own someday, but I don't exactly know what that means. Probably not what you wanna hear, huh?" Mickey was nervous over the confession that he'd dropped out of high school.

Jon's face split into a toothy smile as Mickey tended to the Hawaiian pork. He hoped the smile was something good and not a you're a fuckin' moron smile. With Jon Wells, sometimes it was hard to tell.

"Actually, that's the best news I've heard in a long time. I really want to talk to you, Mickey. I need you… I need to tell you things I've never wanted to tell anybody else. Can we go somewhere to talk?" Jon seemed insistent that they have time for just the two of them.

"Let me get the food together and then we can go back to the ranch. We'll slip out while they're busy eatin'."

When Jon nodded and smiled, Mickey felt his heart flutter. It wasn't the first time it had happened, but it was the first time he thought he had a shot with the gorgeous man.

After the food was settled on the long table Jeri had set up that afternoon before they left with the boys and Tim's aunt and uncle to go to the fair, Mickey got close to Jon so he could whisper without others overhearing their plan. "Slip down the hill and wait for me by the barn." Jon nodded, and ten minutes later, Mickey pulled the same trick.

When the two of them met up outside the barn at the Circle C, Mickey could see Jon was confused. "If they're all up there, why can't we go inside and talk?"

Mickey chuckled. "I made a promise to ‘em when I moved in that I'd never have a one-night stand under their roof, and I respect ‘em too much to not live up to my word."

He saw Jon swallow and then take his hand. "What if it's not a one-night stand? What if it's the two of us figuring out a relationship? I'm a mess. I won't lie. I want you, but not just because you're the sexiest guy I've ever met. I want to spend the time getting to know you, and I want you to get to know me. I know I've said this before, but I mean it with all my fucking heart, okay? I think we have potential, Michael. I think we have a lot of potential, and for the first time in my life, I want to see where this can go. Please, I'm begging you, don't turn your back on me. I don't deserve you, but I'm praying you'll give me a chance."

Mickey wanted to believe the man's words more than he wanted to believe anything he'd ever heard in his life. If Jon was being honest, then maybe they had something to work toward. He hoped so, at least.

"Well, if you wanna talk, then we can go into the house. I know there's cold beer in the fridge. You interested?"

Jon laughed. "Actually, I'd rather go up in that hayloft and talk if you don't mind. I've never had a rendezvous in a hayloft. Feels like we're doing something naughty."

They both laughed as they went into the barn. The radio was on, as it always was, but Mickey turned it down before he climbed up and spread the blanket over the loose hay. He flopped down and pulled Jon down to join him.

The passion in the kisses they shared wasn't a surprise to Mickey because he'd felt the heat every time he was near Jon. The man's lips were soft, and his mouth was so inviting and tasted sweet.

Their tongues caressed each other, and Mickey trembled under Jon's touch, praying it was the real thing and not another dream. When breathing became difficult, Jon pulled away and smiled at him. "You said you want to be something better, so tell me what you think that could mean for you. For the record, Mickey, I don't think there's one thing wrong with you right now."

Mickey processed Jon's words and nodded. "I appreciate your kind words, but we both know you and I are not anywhere close on the smarts scale, Jonny. I'm not sayin' I wanna be different so I can fit into your world, but I'd like to offer you the best me I can."

The light dancing in Jon's eyes spurred Mickey to talk about himself, which wasn't something he enjoyed. If they stood a chance at anything more, Mickey had to be completely honest.

"Regardin' what I might want to do in the future, I remember watchin' a movie about a man who worked with horses sufferin' from trauma. It had that good-lookin' guy in it…the one who was in a movie about Butch Cassidy, I think. Anyway, he was the gentle sort, and after this girl got throwed from her horse when they had a wreck, this man stepped in to bring her and the horse back to health.

"It touched somethin' inside me, and when I ran away from Nashville after Momma tried to pimp me out, I went to Kentucky. I learned about horses, and I eventually ended up here, but if I could ever pick my favorite job, it would be helpin' troubled horses or rescued animals, like Josie, Ryan's horse. She was a rescue and in bad shape, but look at her now," Mickey explained as they situated themselves on the blanket.

Jon smiled. "I remember watching that movie with my mother. She cried through the part with the horse and its injuries. At the time, I didn't understand why she was so upset but I suppose now I do. So, you'd like to be a vet?"

"A vet? Not really. I mean, that's a lot of school and science, and I ain't good at either. I know this sounds ridiculous, but I have a way with horses. I'm not lookin' to go into rodeo like Matt, but I can be a calmin' influence over animals as I've come to know. I've learned to train them, and I think that's what I'd like to do for a living.

"I'd like to train horses like Josh does, and maybe work with horses who've had problems to rehabilitate them so maybe they could be used as therapy horses for kids who have special needs, because I've been readin' up on using animal therapy for certain types of emotional, mental, and physical disabilities in kids. Josh has taught me a lot, and it's likely the only thing I'd be good at doin'.

"So, you see, Jonathon, there's not much we have in common, is there now, really?" Mickey offered the man an out.

Jon laughed. "We both want to help those in need. We have a lot in common, Michael and likely things we haven't even discovered yet. Can I please hold you?" Jon held out his arms as the two of them settled on the hay in the loft of the barn that Matt built.

Mickey settled into his arms and placed his hand on the man's muscled torso. "How was it growin' up for you? I know you and Audrey Langley are best friends, but how about other kids at school?" Mickey hoped to learn things about Jon. He wanted to solidify the hope that the two of them could have something great, as unlikely as it might appear to the outside world.

Jon laughed. "Audrey and I met at birth, basically. Our parents are best friends, and I don't think we had a choice in being friends at all, if the truth be told."

The two of them talked all night long, giving each other every good—and bad—story they had. Jon told Mickey about when he realized his orientation, and Mickey told him about his father's arrest and incarceration, along with his mother's attempts at pimping him out.

Jon snarled at hearing the story, and Mickey pulled him closer, kissing his cheek for the empathy the man offered.

They fell asleep just as the sun was rising, holding each other tightly. Jon dozed first, after which Mickey settled the man on top of his body, thrilled to feel Jon's weight.

Mickey was having a hard time wrapping his head around the fact Jon Wells was interested enough to come back around.

Oh, Mickey was skeptical, but hoped he wasn't reading more into the situation than was there. He prayed Jon was truly interested.