Chapter 10

10

ADAZE

A daze was sitting on her sofa, pounding furiously on her keyboard when Diana arrived. She handed Adaze her coffee with a frown. Adaze didn't even acknowledge it, she just kept working. She could feel Diana's growing frown. For a moment, neither of them said a word as her assistant stood there studying her.

Adaze wasn't going to start this conversation. If Diana was so determined to have it, she could make it happen herself. Well over a minute passed and she continued to stand there. Adaze was getting close to breaking and demanding to know what she wanted when Diana made her move.

"Well, you seem to be in a lovely mood today. How are things with Leilani?" she finally asked, taking her seat.

"Things are great!" She forced a tight smile without looking up from her computer. "Why wouldn't they be great?"

"Well, that's… great?"

"It is," she said a bit too quickly.

Diana took a minute, nodding. When Adaze didn't continue, she did. "Okay, well, why don't you tell me about her?"

Adaze looked up, a frown on her face. She studied the other woman for a moment before shaking her head with a sigh. "Diana, I'm your boss. It would be inappropriate to talk about my romantic relationship with you."

"Oh come on, when has our relationship not been personal? Or do you not remember that gala right after you hired me where I held your hair back after you drank too much of that sweet champagne after eating a single slice of pizza on the drive in? Besides, I'm not asking for all the dirty details or anything. I just want you to tell me what you like about her."

"Oh, is that all?"

"It is. Your happiness is very important to me. I've got to make sure she's up to standard."

Adaze couldn't help the smile forcing its way onto her face. "I don't think you need to worry about that."

"Then tell me something. Anything. What was the first thing you noticed about her? Come on," she whined.

For a while Adaze didn't say anything. Diana's face fell, accepting her silence, then Adaze's face broke out in a smile so wide it hurt. "Her spirit, that was the first thing I noticed about her. She's so fearless and her spirit shines so bright like sunlight itself. I've never seen anyone like her."

"High praise coming from you. I've seen the circles you travel."

"The trust-fund babies from the gala circle aren't fearless, they're naive at best and careless at worst. It's not the same thing. Not even close."

"What do you mean?"

Adaze sighed, setting her laptop off to the side. She ignored the dramatic gasp Diana let out at the gesture. "When we met, it was that day on the yacht. I told you about that, but I didn't tell you about her. When my boat was sinking, it got to a point where things weren't looking good. They were supposed to have support, but there wouldn't have been enough time and a storm was starting. She knew I would die if she didn't act, and she didn't hesitate. She threw caution to the wind—going against protocol—and jumped into the water to save me. She swam who knows how far in the freezing cold water, climbed into my boat and helped me to the deck. Even when we got there, we weren't safe. There was no good way to get us off. This insane, wonderful woman talked me into getting on her back while she jumped into the water, and she swam both of us to the boat."

"Wow. She must be buff."

Adaze didn't even hear her. "But that wasn't enough for her. She just showed up to the hospital I was at and waited for them to discharge me. She did all that because she was worried I wouldn't have a ride home. I could have just called someone or used a service, but there she was, so I said yes. She didn't even ask for my number or anything until she dropped me off," Adaze finished in a rush. It was the first time she'd told anyone any of this and somehow that made it feel so much more real. Her heart raced in her chest at the memory. She hated the way she couldn't tell if it was from thinking about Leilani or the sheer horror of the very thing that brought them together in the first place.

Diana shook her head. "That's—that's terrifying. I'm so glad you're alright. Are you sure you don't want me to call your therapist?"

"I'm fine, really. It was worth it to meet Leilani."

The woman smiled, a small laugh spilling from her lips. "She must be an incredible person."

"She is. She doesn't like to admit it, but without her, I probably wouldn't be alive right now."

That sentence made Diana's face fall. A concerned frown covered where her bright smile once lived. "But that's not why you're dating her, is it? You don't feel like you owe it to her or whatever?"

Adaze's face turned to horror. "No! God no! I just—I really like her. She was actually worried about that too when we first started seeing each other, but we talked about it and we're both on the same page."

Diana lit up. "I'm glad. I mean it. You deserve to be happy."

"Thanks. She makes me happy. I won't lie, I wasn't sure I would ever see anyone again. I'm glad she asked for my number."

"I'm so happy for you. If you don't mind me asking?—"

"Even if I did, when has that ever stopped you from asking something before?"

Diana continued undeterred. "When was the last time the two of you saw each other?"

Adaze shrugged, trying not to let her face fall too much. "Not that long ago really. Only a few days. She's been busy with work."

"I see." Diana let out a good-natured chuckle. "So that's what this is about."

Adaze crossed her arms. This had better not be going where she thought it was. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"It's okay to admit you miss your girlfriend, you know."

And it was. She scoffed. "Why would I miss her? It hasn't even been a week. It's only been three days. I'm not that clingy. That would be ridiculous. Come on, Diana, be reasonable here."

Diana just rolled her eyes. "Maybe you usually aren't or never have been before, but it's a new relationship. It's normal to be a bit ‘clingy' in the beginning. Especially since this is the first time you've dated someone since your divorce."

"Do you need to bring up the divorce?" she scowled.

"It was a big deal. I remember the state it left you in. I was worried you were never going to try and date after that. You even said yourself less than five minutes ago that you don't know if you would have ever tried to date again. It makes sense that you'd be feeling a lot right now. It seems completely reasonable."

"Well, you're right. I honestly wasn't planning on it before I met Leilani, but that still doesn't mean we can't spend a few days apart without me going all…" She waved her hands in a gesture she hoped conveyed some kind of meaning.

Diana snorted. "Maybe not. You know what would fix this? Talking to her. Let her know you miss her and want to spend time with her soon."

"I'm sure I'll see her soon enough," Adaze huffed, picking her laptop back up. "There's no reason to make this a whole thing."

"Of course not." She ignored the way Diana rolled her eyes. "Have you told her about V— about what happened?"

"She knows I'm divorced. She doesn't need to know what happened."

"Are you sure? It might be good to give her some idea of where you're coming from so you can make sure you're both comfortable with everything."

"I don't see the point. All it would do is dredge up old memories. Nobody wants to hear all the dirty details of how their new girlfriend broke up with her ex-wife."

"Sometimes that needs to happen. Besides, it's bound to happen on its own. You haven't been in a situation that could happen in since… well, you know."

"Yes, I know. My love life has been nonexistent for the past three years and you're worried I'm going to snap now that I'm dating again."

"I'm not worried you're going to snap. I'm just pointing out you might need to deal with things you've successfully been avoiding until now."

"Thank you for the unsolicited warning. Can you drop it for now?"

"Yeah, of course, but as a reminder, since you hired and continue to employ me, all of my warnings are solicited. If you didn't want them, you could send me away or fire me."

"I couldn't do that. It would be far too much work to train someone else to take your place."

Diana snorted. "Has she organized every date you've gone on so far?"

Adaze shrugged. "She might have. Leilani just seems to constantly have something she wants to show me or somewhere she wants to take me. She has a childlike wonder at the world that just makes me want to go along for the ride with her."

"Then why don't you take her out for a change this weekend?"

She thought for a moment. "I could do that. Do you think it's too soon to pull out all the stops?"

"I think she would like that. Do you want me to help you start planning?"

Adaze shook her head, much to Diana's surprise. "I think it would be best if I handle this myself."

"Right, well you know where to find me if you change your mind."

The pair lapsed into silence as they worked. After about an hour, Adaze found herself setting her actual work aside. Instead, she turned her attention to getting everything in order for their date.

Pulling up a spreadsheet, she listed out all of her options and their pros and cons. She drew up possible timelines and itineraries.

Needless to say, she didn't get any more work done that night.

Later that night, Leilani called her as she was getting ready for bed.

"What days are you off this week?" Adaze asked.

"I'm off Thursday and Friday, why?"

"Thursday night, I'm going to take you out."

She laughed. "Oh really? And where are you going to take me?"

"Wouldn't you like to know."

"I would. How else am I supposed to know what to wear or pack in my bag."

"You just let me handle that."

"What are you going to do? Pick my clothes out for me?"

"Would you be against it if I did?"

She laughed again. "I didn't say that, but you'd have to come up with something pretty impressive."

"I'm sure I'll manage."

"Just let me know if you need my input for any of this."

"I will."

"So aside from whatever you're plotting, what did you get up to today?"

"Just the usual. I got some work done. Diana came by again. I'm surprised she isn't chomping at the bit to meet you yet."

"Do you want me to meet her?"

Adaze had not yet considered introducing Leilani to anyone. She just enjoyed the little bubble the two of them had and wanted to preserve it a while longer. Everyone she knew knew her ex-wife. And she just wanted to protect Leilani from that whole shit show.

"Do you want to?"

Adaze could picture the way she would shrug. "I don't know. I was just asking."

"Well, think about it, because if it's anyone's choice, it should be you."

"Shouldn't it be yours?"

Adaze hesitated. "I'd rather leave it up to you."

"If you're sure. Let me think about it and I'll give you an answer on our date."

"Sounds good. I can't wait."

"Me too. I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. I know it's only been a few days but its still too long."

"I feel the same way. Do you want to spend the night at my place or yours after the date?"

Leilani hummed. "You're the one planning the date. You pick."

"We almost always go to my place. Let's go to yours. I wouldn't want Jaspurr to feel left out."

"You're so sweet to think about him!"

"Yeah, well, he's a cute little guy. How could I not?"

"You should have seen this dog I saw today when I went to the coffee shop. He only had one eye just like my little boy."

"Wow, what're the odds of that?"

"I know right!? Turns out his owner is in town for work for a few weeks and has been having a hard time finding good places to take him for walks. I'm going to recommend a few."

"That's nice of you."

"Well, I can't let her little guy go without walkies just because they're on a little trip."

The pair talked late into the night while Adaze tried to push down the jealousy she could feel growing inside her.