21. Jade

When Patten and Isaiah come back from their trip to the bar, from the speed Patten closes the door, it’s clear that something happened.

Isaiah is quiet as he walks into the living room. He doesn’t look at me, and I get the sense he isn’t okay.

Patten explains about a man in army fatigues shooting at them and how Isaiah chased the man, caught up to him, and drained him.

“Were you followed?” Shep glances at the front door, as if ready to lunge out at a moment’s notice.

We all suspect Atticus is probably hiding in one of the mountains outside of town.

I asked Shep why we don’t go after him now, and he just shook his head and said we need to be sure about our next steps before we move. We walked into a trap before, and he didn’t intend to let it happen again.

But I think Shep is delaying because he knows I would want to go, and he wants to keep me safe.

Patten walks over to the refrigerator and opens it. “No. We drove around a bit first. And no beer. Shit. I could have really done with a drink.”

Isaiah is still quiet, standing with his hands stuffed in his pockets.

I look at him and I make a decision I should have made long before now.

“I’d like to see my dad tomorrow morning.” I pushed for Shep, Isaiah, and Patten to help me rescue Dominik, and Atticus shot Dad out of the sky. Maybe I should start thinking more about what will keep everyone alive rather than what I want.

Everyone looks at me.

“To see if it’s safe to move him yet,” I explain. “It’s not right that I’m putting all of you at risk. We should leave.”

“And Atticus?” Shep leans against the kitchen island, expression serious.

“He will probably follow us wherever we go, but maybe that’s the best thing for everyone.”

“To Chicago, I presume?” Dominik asks.

I lift my chin. “Yes.”

His lips flatten, the only sign he’s not happy about it. “It would be safer in my penthouse.”

“Maybe. But would you let me leave if I said I wanted to?”

“You belong with me, Jade,” Dominik insists.

I look at Isaiah before we can argue like I want to. “Are you okay?”

He nods, smiling faintly, but he’s not. Staying put him in a situation where he drained someone, and now it’s made him think of Amelie, a memory that still haunts him.

“I’d like to see my dad early and we can leave soon after,” I tell Shep firmly. “For Chicago.”

“I think going to bed is a good idea,” Shep says slowly. “We can rest and talk things over in the morning.”

I’d thought he would be itching to leave with his hesitation to investigate the mountains where Atticus is likely hiding. “You don’t think it’s a good idea?”

“I think we need to talk out all the pros and cons before jumping into the car and taking off. Staying has its risks, but so does leaving. Go to bed. I’m going to stay up for a bit, maybe let my wolf out for a run.”

“Why do I think it’s less of a run and more making sure no one else attacks?” I ask.

He gives me a lopsided smile. “It’s a little of both. Go on up. Isaiah, you look like you need to lie down and Patten?—”

“Will go up with Jade.” Patten’s eyes narrow at Dominik. “After this talk of New York penthouses, I’d like to make sure she doesn’t wind up back in one.”

On my way upstairs with Patten, I change direction and walk over to Isaiah. “Can I hug you?”

His brow furrows. “Why would you want to do that?”

“I just do.”

He studies me for a beat, as if he can’t quite work me out, and then nods.

I wrap my arms around his hips and press my cheek against his chest as I squeeze, wanting to comfort him. “It wasn’t your fault, and I don’t see you any differently than how I saw you before.”

He gives me a far too brief squeeze, kissing the top of my head. “Good night, ma belle. I’ll stay and watch the house with Shep.”

Patten said ma belle was French for beautiful. I’m not, but I will never stop feeling grateful that these three men think I am.

As I head for the stairs, I notice Dominik is watching me. I thought he would be glaring because I hugged Isaiah and I’m still refusing to go with him to New York.

He looks confused.

Upstairs, Patten and I brush our teeth and wash our faces.

In his room, as he lies under the covers in bed, I sit cross-legged on top of the comforter, wearing one of his T-shirts, not ready to sleep yet.

“Isaiah isn’t okay, is he?” I ask.

Patten shakes his head. “He saved my life from the shooter. I didn’t see a damn thing until after he shoved me to the ground, and now he’s beating himself up over it.”

“What did you see?”

“A bullet hole.”

I swallow hard, absorbing how close I came to losing him. That near miss confirms that leaving is the best thing for all of us. “One of Atticus’s guards?”

He nods. “I think so. No stake means it was me they wanted. It could be Atticus wanting to take us out one by one. It could have been my da. Or maybe this is something else.”

I hope it’s not something else. This is plenty to deal with.

“And Isaiah lost control?” I lower my voice, hoping he can’t hear from downstairs.

Patten’s expression turns thoughtful as he pillows his head with folded arms.

It’s important that I learn to wield my slowly emerging powers. If it wasn’t, I’d crawl up this bed, slip under the covers with Patten, and rest my head against his bare chest.

“No, I don’t think he lost control. He does, but I don’t. He was angry, and he had a good reason to be. If someone had taken a pot shot at him, I’d have killed the guy too. I tried telling Isaiah, but…”

“He doesn’t see it the same way?”

He shakes his head again.

And he wouldn’t. He drained Amelie, the woman he loved, and now he doesn’t trust himself to feed on a person without killing them.

I focus on my right arm.

“What are you doing?” Patten asks when I’m getting a headache from straining.

“Trying to get better at using my powers.”

And maybe Isaiah won’t have to do something else that gives him more nightmares.

I’m edging into migraine levels of pain when Patten mutters, “I can’t believe I’m even suggesting this, but can’t you ask dragon guy?”

“Dominik is a liar. He will lie to me and I will buy it because I’m too na?ve to tell truth from lie,” I bite out, angry at myself for pushing to stay.

We could have been back in Chicago and Isaiah wouldn’t have had to do what he did. How long will it take him to forgive himself for it? And what if he can’t?

I could have avoided all of this if I hadn’t been so determined to stay in a place I know isn’t safe.

I yelp when Patten grips my wrist and hauls me toward him. “Stop for a bit. You’re red in the face, and you sound bitter, beautiful.”

Maybe I am.

Seconds later, I’m right where I wanted to be. Under the comforter, with my head on his chest and his arm tight around my waist.

“Do you think anyone else got out of the compound?” I ask.

“We survived and so did a bunch of those guards, so I’d say, probably.”

I nod, lifting my right hand to touch his chest. A translucent blue ribbon lazily circles my wrist. I mentally sigh. When I actually try to call the thing, I wind up with a pounding head. When I’m not paying attention? There it is.

Some friend.

“Jade?”

I leave spirit to continue its lazy circling in order to focus on Patten’s serious expression. “What is it?”

“The world can be a real shitty place, full of crooks and pricks and the shittiest shits.”

He provokes a reluctant smile. “That’s a lot of shit.”

Patten doesn’t smile back. “Don’t let them change what you are. We terrified you when we found you in that attic, and you still treated us better than we deserved.” He stares up at the ceiling. “Don’t let this fucked up world turn you bitter.”

I scrutinize him. I can’t see his face from this angle, just his jaw and the stubble forming there. “Did it do that to you?”

He sighs. “It made me cynical. You’re not a cynic. Don’t let it turn you into one.”

“Because you like me the way I am?”

“Like?” His gaze returns to mine, midnight-blue eyes softening in amusement as his lips curve into a smile. “Hmm. Interesting word. But… tame.”

“Tame?”

“Yup.”

“What word is not tame?” I hold my breath as my heart trips a little faster.

He winks. “Not sure yet. Let me figure it out and I’ll let you know.”

“Okay.”

He glances at my right wrist where spirit is still lazily circling my wrist. It’s strange to see the blue ribbon pass through Patten’s chest. After what I did to his dad, I’d have thought he would be wary.

“Don’t you feel it?” I ask.

“It tickles a little,” he admits. “First, I thought it was your hair. I nearly dove out of bed when I realized it was your blue ribbon friend.”

“Aren’t you afraid of it?”

“That thing is there to protect you. That’s not something to fear, it’s something to be relieved about.”

We both study it. Then he blurts out. “Test your control on me.”

I lift my brow. “What?”

“Take my shorts off.”

My brow rises even higher. “You want me to test my abilities by getting you naked?”

He shoves the comforter down. “The ties on these shorts are fiddly. If you can get these suckers off, there’s nothing you can’t do with that gift of yours.”

I walk my fingers down his hard, muscled chest, halting before I reach the fiddly drawstring. “You’re not concerned I might hurt you?”

His eyes go half-lidded. “Well, if there was something else you wanted to try with that gift of yours while you’re hanging out down there, go wild.”

I grin at him. “Isaiah was right. You do like to live dangerously.”

He frames my face with one hand. “You’ve got a soft and squishy heart, beautiful.”

“I do?”

“You do. So don’t let people shit all over it or harden it. Let me protect it.”

He said like was too tame of a word, and I think he was right. The way Patten makes me feel is so far beyond like it’s hilarious.

He pulls me closer, kisses me, and drags the comforter up over the both of us.

“What happened to me testing my abilities?” I ask.

“Maybe when your blue ribbon friend returns.”

I look down and I sigh. “You say it’s a friend, but this is a friend who likes to ghost me. Often. Spirit does what it wants.”

“My first experiences with fire were similar.” Patten reaches over to the bedside table and flicks off the light.. “The more you try to hold on to some things, the more they squirm to get away. Or ignore you. Try easing your grip. Spirit might be as playful as fire.”

“Fire is playful?” I slide my arm around Patten, settling down for the night.

“It is. Could be that powers are learning and growing with you. Start small.” He yawns.

Start small.

“But if you decide you want to slam Dominik into the next century, well…”