Chapter 7

“WHAT ARE we going to do?” Fillian asked fellow troopers Casey Bombaro and Wyatt Nelson. They met near exit forty-nine on eighty-one. Both men were mentors to him. Not only were they more seasoned troopers, but both were gay, and their experience had helped him navigate the sometimes old-fashioned brotherhood of officers. “He’s got two kids, and I’m not sure how to protect him.”

“The suspect is on bail, so he’s already on shaky ground. You’d think he’d leave well enough alone and keep his head down.” Wyatt shook his head. “But we all know that sometimes rational thoughts and actions just don’t happen.”

“There are limits to what we can do. The local police and the sheriff’s department have jurisdiction over the town itself,” Casey added.

“I know,” Fillian said. “But this is frustrating as all hell. He isn’t hiding what he’s doing, and we could probably make a case for attempted witness tampering, but he never says anything. He just watches, and he seems to be following Gregory around. Last night Gregory told me that he was on a job in South Middlesex and saw him hanging around.” Fillian grew more frustrated each time Lawrence Little was spotted.

“We’re here for you,” Wyatt said. “And for them. But our hands are tied until he does something illegal. I’m assuming that you’ve kept records of when he’s been spotted.”

“Yes. And I turned them in to the DA, but they don’t have enough to go to the judge to have his bail revoked yet.” It was the most frustrating thing Fillian had ever experienced, and that included hours sitting by the side of the road to catch speeders. “I know we have to follow procedure and the law, but there are times when….” He closed his eyes and forced himself to regain control of his emotions. Just the thought that Lawrence could be out there right now watching Gregory or the kids made him more than a little angry. They didn’t deserve this.

“The one thing we all learned in the academy is to keep our eyes open and to pay attention to detail. That’s what you have to do here.” Wyatt reached through the open window of his cruiser and got his cup of coffee, then sipped it. “You can’t let him get under your skin. It’s pretty obvious that you like Gregory, but what would you be doing if this was just another case?”

Fillian nodded. He’d take notes, add to the case file, and wait. But this wasn’t just another case—this was Gregory, Weston, and Marnie. Somehow, without him thinking about it, all three of them had gotten under his skin and into his heart. “You know, that’s it. I’ve been worried about Gregory and the kids, but I haven’t been doing the other side of my job. I need to find out where Lawrence is living.” This was so stupid and basic. He should have thought of that earlier, but he was otherwise distracted.

“All right. He has to list his address with the court since he’s out on bail.”

“And the place he was living exploded, taking two other homes with it. I’m willing to bet that he listed that as his residence, and he can’t be staying there.” Maybe this was the information he needed. “The investigation is still active, but I’ll take a trip out there and see what’s going on.” Fillian would also check with the court to see what they had for an address before he went.

“Sounds like a plan. The biggest thing is to keep your head about you and look at things logically,” Wyatt told him.

“Did you do that when you met Quinton?” Fillian asked.

Wyatt chuckled. “Well… I did my job and things worked out, but it’s hard, and you know it. We’re police officers, but we’re people too, and our emotions sometimes get the better of us. I sometimes think we’re hardwired to try to protect, especially the people we care about. I know I’d do anything to keep Quinton and Callum safe, no matter what.” They both looked at Casey, who nodded. “But remember that logic and good police work are going to get you a lot farther than flying off the handle.”

Fillian sighed. “I know that.”

“Okay. So do your job the best you can and keep your wits about you,” Casey told him, clapping Fillian on the shoulder. “Finding out what’s really going on and getting the information you need on the suspect are going to do more good than the worry and fear ever will.” He finished his coffee and handed Fillian the cup. “Rookie takes care of the trash.” He grinned and climbed back into his cruiser, then took off down the highway.

Fillian rolled his eyes, took Wyatt’s cup as well, and tossed both in the rest area trash can before heading down the road and across town toward the location of the original call. He wanted to take a look at what was left of the house Lawrence had been renting.

Along the way, he did a wellness check that was called in and found a retiree in her recliner. It had broken and tipped back, holding her at an odd angle and separating her from her phone. Fillian helped her out of the chair and got her phone back in her possession. “Are you sure there isn’t someone who can help you?”

“I’m fine as long as I leave that old chair of my husband’s alone. I always told him to get rid of it, and now that he’d dead I don’t have the heart to throw it away. But I’m not going to sit in it again.” She used her cane to see him to the door.

Fillian called back to Dispatch to report before continuing on.

He pulled into the property’s drive. There was very little left of the house other than the foundation and charred debris. Fillian turned off the engine and carefully got out of the cruiser. The wind blew through the trees that surrounded the clearing, the scent of fire permeating the air.

There was no one around, and he slowly made his way up to where the house had been, looking into the charred mess of the house and what had been inside. Fillian walked the perimeter, checking for any sign that someone had been there recently, but he found nothing. The garden shed had been charred but still stood, the door hanging open on a single hinge. He checked inside before moving on. As he headed back toward the car, Fillian noticed a path through the trees to the west.

He cautiously checked through the brush and then stepped down the path, on his guard. It led a few dozen yards away from the road before opening up into a small clearing, where he found a makeshift tent with a plastic bag of clothes and another bag with a sleeping bag. Fillian checked through the things without disturbing them before heading back down the trail to his car. At least he knew where Lawrence had been living, and while it was likely he didn’t have permission to squat on the property, he was technically living at the address he’d given the court.

Back in the car, he backed out of the drive and onto the road and headed toward town—but then he received a call to reroute to a major accident scene on the freeway.

FILLIAN WAS dog-tired when his shift ended. He drove to Gregory’s, pleased to find him at home.

Gregory answered the door. “How was your day?”

Fillian smiled at him. “Good. I went out to the scene of an accident, and I know where your stalker is living, but he wasn’t there.”

“What about his car?” Gregory asked. “He had a car when I worked for him.”

“I didn’t see it. I suspect that he’s living in it when he isn’t at the camp. Did you see him anywhere today?”

“No, thank goodness. I kept looking for him, though.”

Fillian looked around. “Where are the kids?” The apartment was unusually quiet.

“At the Y for a day camp. I need to go pick them up in a few minutes. I just stopped here to change clothes and get cleaned up.”

“Then I should head on home myself,” Fillian said.

Gregory moved a little closer. “You know, you could come with us. I promised the kids that we could have hamburgers for dinner and then ice cream.” He smiled, and Fillian placed his hands on either side of Gregory’s face and cupped his cheeks. Then he closed the distance between them and kissed Gregory hard until he groaned softly against Fillian’s lips.

“I’d really like to lick something other than a cone,” Fillian whispered.

Gregory shivered under his touch. Fillian then backed away and smiled.

“You really know how to tease a guy,” Gregory said softly. “Sometimes I wonder if you’re for real.”

“Of course I am. We grew up next door to one another.”

“Yeah, but….” Gregory paused, biting his lower lip. “I keep wondering if I can believe that this is real. I mean, I have two kids, and most guys aren’t interested in taking on that kind of commitment. Then all of a sudden, my life changes and here you are.”

Fillian stroked Gregory’s cheek. “And you think I’d play games with you?”

Gregory shrugged. “I don’t know what to think. I want to believe in this.” He placed his hand on Fillian’s. “I really do. But it’s difficult.”

“No, it’s not. All you have to do is let yourself accept what’s standing right in front of you.” He smiled slightly, looking into Gregory’s deep blue eyes. He wanted to kiss him again, but he was afraid to push too hard. “We’ll take things slow.”

“Yeah,” Gregory breathed. “We have to pick up the kids.”

Fillian nodded and let his hand drop away. Then he left the apartment with Gregory behind him.

Fillian rode in Gregory’s truck to the Y. A group of kids sat in the shade with their backpacks next to them. Gregory parked and got out. Weston and Marnie hurried over, and Gregory spoke to the attendants, who logged them out. Fillian got out and strode up to the attendant.

“We’re all set,” Gregory said.

“I’ll be there in just a minute,” Fillian said before speaking to the young woman with the clipboard. “I don’t want to bother you, but I’m with the state police.” He showed her his identification. “I just want to know if you’ve seen anyone hanging around the kids, watching them.”

She swallowed hard. “No. We’ve spent much of the day in the gym inside or out here on the playground, and the area is fenced. We check the kids in when they get here, count them when they go out, and do the same when they return inside.” She showed him her clipboard. “And we check them out again when they leave.”

Fillian nodded.

“Has there been a complaint or a problem?” The girl’s hand shook a little as she asked.

“No.” Fillian smiled, trying to put her at ease. He hadn’t meant to go complete police officer on her. “Just keep your eyes open. We’ve had some issues with people hanging around places where kids are. Just keep watch, okay?” He thanked her and returned to the car. He shared a smile with Gregory and got back in.

“Is everything okay?” Gregory asked.

“Yes. It’s all fine.” At least for now. He didn’t think Lawrence had followed the kids to the Y, but he wanted to be sure. He didn’t think he was interested in the kids—he thought he was fixated on Gregory—but that was just a theory. “Let’s go eat.”

“Yay,” the kids said in unison, and Gregory drove them to the diner on the edge of town.

THE FOLLOWING evening they had rugby practice. Gregory brought the kids because he didn’t have someone to watch them. They moved one of the park picnic tables nearer to the practice field so the kids could be close to them and so it would be easier to watch them between plays.

It was pretty clear that they didn’t want to be there. The kids were grumpy, and once they got down to practice, Gregory seemed distracted. He almost tripped over his own feet, and Fillian found himself watching Gregory more than paying attention to what he was doing. “What’s going on?” he asked while Coach worked with one of the sections.

“My mother,” Gregory growled.

“What did she do?” Fillian had wondered if Gregory’s stalker was back. He hadn’t been seen in a few days, so Fillian had hoped Lawrence had moved on. It seemed logical that he would get tired of Gregory when someone else captured his imagination.

“She was supposed to watch the kids while I was at practice. Mom has been asking to take the kids shopping for school clothes, which would be a huge help. She was supposed to take them this evening. That way they wouldn’t have to sit at the table for a couple of hours. They were looking forward to it, but she backed out at the last minute because she had forgotten an appointment to get her nails done and didn’t want to reschedule. All she would have had to do was pick up the phone and get a different time. Is that really so hard? Maybe I’m dumb, but shouldn’t her grandchildren come before a manicure?”

Fillian was pretty sure it was more than that to Gregory. “It’s okay. We can take them shopping if you like. I have Sunday off.” He leaned closer until his forehead touched Gregory’s, their gazes locking. “We’ll figure it out.”

“I know. But they were looking forward to it.”

Gregory was truly upset, and Fillian wanted to make him feel better. He slipped his hand round the back of his neck and held it there, and within seconds, the world became just the two of them in this little bubble that grew hotter by the second. Fillian swallowed hard, completely forgetting where he was.

“Get a room,” one of the guys shouted from behind him.

Fillian rolled his eyes and pulled back. “We should get back to practice,” he said softly. “But don’t sweat it. We’ll figure it out.” He gently patted the back of Gregory’s neck before letting his hand slip away. Instantly Fillian missed that touch and the warmth from Gregory’s gaze, and he was in the real world again, which didn’t hold a candle to one where it was only him and Gregory.

“Get your heads out of your butts,” Coach told both of them. Fillian nodded and hurried back onto the field, and practice continued.

During each break, he looked over at the kids and scanned the area around the park. He kept expecting that hair-standing-on-end feeling, but it never came, and he never saw anyone hanging around watching the kids or the practice. As practice continued, Gregory loosened up and they were able to play some really good rugby.

“Are you done yet?” Weston half whined when Fillian hurried over to the table to get some water during a brief break.

“Not too much longer,” he answered. “Why don’t you and Marnie each draw a picture for your dad? He’s been a little sad, and I know that would cheer him up, okay?” He figured giving them something to do would be help the time pass more quickly.

They both smiled and lowered their heads to make their pictures. Fillian finished the water and jogged back to the practice. “They okay?” Gregory asked as he picked himself up from a tackle. He was grinning and covered in dirt.

“Yes. But they’re bored and reaching the end of their patience,” Fillian told him. “They’ve been really good, though.” Those kids were pretty amazing as far as he was concerned.

Gregory smiled as he looked toward the table, but after a few seconds, his expression fell. “What is she doing here?”

Fillian turned to look. Gregory’s mother strode across the grass in high heels, her flowing coverup blowing in the breeze like a royal blue sail. She went right to the table to stand with the kids. Gregory jogged over while Fillian stayed behind, wondering what sort of trouble she was trying to stir up.

“You leave the kids sitting here alone while you’re out there running around like a schoolboy?” His mother’s voice carried on the breeze. Fillian’s anger rose, and he wanted to go over to back Gregory up, but he knew it would only escalate the situation.

“The kids are fine. Fillian and I….” Gregory turned away and his voice was lost.

“Let’s clean up and put things away,” Coach said, calling it a day. “But you all had better bring your top form this weekend or we’re going to get our heads handed to us.”

Weston got up from the table and raced out onto the field. He practically barreled into Fillian. “Grandma is being mean to Daddy.” He hugged Fillian’s legs.

Fillian ruffled Weston’s hair. “Let’s go see what’s going on.” Weston took his hand, and they walked back to where Gregory stood, his body rife with tension, every muscle taut.

“I think it’s time for you to go,” Gregory told his mother between clenched teeth.

“I’m going to take the kids with me,” she pronounced.

Gregory was clearly shocked, but he recovered quickly. “No, you’re not,” he countered, glaring at his mother, tension building even higher.

“You obviously aren’t looking after them. They’re here at a table while you’re over there on the field. How is that looking after them? The last time you did this, Marnie got sick because you weren’t paying close enough attention.” She waved her hand like she was dismissing whatever Gregory said. “I don’t know why Arthur and Stephanie thought you could raise their children, but you clearly can’t, and—”

“Because they didn’t want you,” Gregory snapped. “They knew you were a terrible mother, and they didn’t want their kids raised the way Arthur and I were.” He leaned closer. “They wanted someone who would care for them and not leave them in the care of babysitters, the cleaning lady, hell, anyone who would watch us while you were out doing God knows what.” Gregory clearly had a great head of steam. “And as much as you like to think you’re some kind of mother of the year, what you want and think hardly matters. So go home and leave us alone.” He leaned closer as Fillian strode over to him. “If you want to see them again, ever… then you need to change the attitude.”

“I have rights,” she snapped, drawing back her hand.

“Not here, you don’t,” Fillian said gently. “There is a fallacy that grandparents have rights. They don’t. Not over a legal parent, and like it or not, that’s Gregory.”

“You’re mistaken,” she said, turning on Fillian.

“I don’t think so, and don’t you dare hit him.” He could see the anger in her eyes and the way she had already pulled her hand back. “I will arrest you for assault and you can spend a couple days in jail.” Fillian wasn’t going to mess around. “Now, as Gregory said, it’s time for you to go. You’ve caused enough of a scene in front of the entire rugby team, as well as your grandchildren.” Maybe reminding her of everyone watching would get her to back away.

“Just go home, Mother. You don’t get to make demands here. And whatever case you think you’re making isn’t being helped by this display. Now, I have to get the kids home so they can have dinner, because that’s what parents do. And they don’t try to feed kids blue cheese macaroni.” He turned and began getting the kids ready. Fillian waited until Gregory’s mother stalked off, leaving depressions in the dirt from her high heels.

“Jesus…,” Fillian breathed as he waited for her to get in her silver Acura and drive away.

“Can Grandma really take us away?” Weston asked as Gregory held him and Marnie, both kids upset.

“No. You’re going to stay with me. That was what your mom and dad wanted, so that’s what’s going to happen.” Gregory sounded confident, and Fillian put his hand on his shoulder just to let him know he had his support.

“But Grandma was mad,” Marnie said. “And she’s mean when she’s mad.”

Gregory hugged the kids more tightly. “It’s okay. She’s mad at me, not you. And that’s okay. She can be mad at me all she wants, but I’m not going to let either of you go. You call me Daddy, and that’s what I’m going to be forever and ever. I promise you that.”

Fillian wanted to shake Gregory’s mother, but he stepped back and let Gregory have a few minutes with the kids while he said goodbye to the other players.

“Watch out for him,” Stevie said. “She’s a real terror when she wants to be.”

“I know, and I promise I will,” Fillian agreed. After the last of the guys left and the cloudy day shifted to mist, he returned to where Gregory was speaking quietly with the kids, who had settled down. “What do you all want for dinner? We can cook.”

“Can I help?” Marnie asked.

“Of course. You both can.” Fillian met Gregory’s grateful gaze. He had clearly been through the wringer. “We can stop at the store and get some of your favorite things, if that’s okay with your daddy.”

“Ice cream and cupcakes?” Weston asked.

“Sure,” Gregory agreed, and once he got the kids in the truck, Fillian followed him over to the store. They got a cart and wheeled it through the aisles.

“I don’t know why she has to be that way,” Gregory said in a whisper as the kids stood in front of the freezer case to pick out the flavor of ice cream they wanted. The cart already had chicken and beef in it, along with cupcakes, eggs, and a few other essentials. “She wasn’t a good mother to Arthur or to me, and my father wasn’t much better. They had their own lives and made very little room for us. For the longest time I thought that sort of family dynamic was normal. But watching your family and your mom and dad showed me that there was something different. At least from the outside.”

“I’m sorry,” Fillian said, not sure what else there was to say.

“And now she wants to raise Arthur’s kids the same way she raised us. Mom isn’t interested in raising these kids any more than she was interested in raising me and Arthur. I won’t put the kids through what we went through. I know Arthur wouldn’t have wanted that.” He stopped the cart and got some bags of frozen veggies as the kids came over with a carton of double chocolate brownie ice cream.

“Can we have this?” Marnie asked.

“If you want,” Gregory told her before adding it to the cart. “Is there anything else we need? If not, we should get to the checkout so we can go home and get dinner started. It’s a little late, and you both need baths and to get ready for bed right after we finish dinner.” He seemed worn out, so Fillian took charge of the groceries before getting them checked out and following Gregory home.

“HOW ABOUT chicken?” Fillian offered, and that seemed to be a hit with the kids, so he made dinner and got them all fed before Gregory took an extra-long time to put the kids to bed.

“Are they okay?” Fillian asked from the sofa. He’d cleaned up the dishes and had been waiting for him.

Gregory took a seat next to him. “Yeah. What my mother said scared them to death. Weston asked if they had been bad, and Marnie cried. I’ve done my best to try to keep the strain with my mother from them. I wanted the kids to have a good relationship with both their grandparents, not that they see my dad very often now that he’s moved to North Carolina. But when she acts like that, I can’t do anything other than keep the kids away from her.”

“Was she always so self-centered?” Fillian asked. “Wait, I guess she was from what you’ve told me, but was she always so vehement?”

Gregory shrugged. “I think my mother blames me somehow. Arthur was always her favorite. He was the one that Mom used to take to a few of her meetings sometimes. He was the one who could sometimes make her understand that we didn’t like being shuffled off all the time. Especially as he got older, Mom would listen to him. She never listened to me.” He sighed and then shrugged. “At least I got them comforted and calmed down. Hopefully they’ll sleep and the memory of what they saw and heard will fade.”

“I don’t know about that,” Fillian said. “I get the feeling that your mother isn’t one of their favorite people.” He had noticed how they didn’t get excited and run over to her when she came around. They tended to hang back. There was no excitement to see her at all. “But we can talk about something else if you like.”

Gregory shifted so he was looking more in Fillian’s direction. “Oh thank God,” he breathed. “Anything but her.” He rested his head on the back of the sofa. “Sometimes I feel like there’s a box around me that keeps getting smaller and I’m being squeezed into a tighter space all the time. My mother wants to try to take the kids from me, or at least use that threat as leverage for whatever she wants, and then there’s this crazy hoarder guy who doesn’t want to leave me alone. Though I haven’t seen him lately, it doesn’t mean he isn’t there. Maybe he’s being more careful right now, I don’t know. I’m on edge all the time, and at work….”

“How is work? Are you busy?” Fillian asked, trying to give Gregory an opening if he wanted to change the subject.

“I’m busy, but it’s mostly small jobs, and I wonder if my stalker is going to show up or something. Then there’s the kids, and I wonder if they’re safe.”

Fillian hugged him, and Gregory shook in his arms. “You know the worry about the kids just means you’re a good parent. Your mother is only interested in what she wants, while you’re the one concerned about Weston and Marnie. That says a lot.” He held him tighter and closed his eyes, hoping that the act of comfort would sink in a little for Gregory.

It was becoming clear that Gregory had spent a lot of his life alone—or at least on his own. His parents weren’t supportive and seemed interested in their own needs rather than those of their kids. Fillian was lucky in that regard, and he was grateful to his mom and dad every day. As a kid, he had been jealous of Gregory for all the material things he had, but as an adult, he knew he had been the true lucky one. “It will be all right.”

“I wish I had your confidence,” Gregory said softly, pulling back from the hug. It surprised Fillian how dull and tired Gregory seemed, like all his energy had been sapped away. Under most circumstances, Gregory was energetic. On the rugby field, he ran from end to end countless times and still had the juice to celebrate with the kids and include them when the team won. He was an amazing man, and yet in this moment, he seemed at such a low ebb.

“You will. I think you need to get some rest. You have work tomorrow, and I have to be on shift first thing.” Even as the words passed his lips, he didn’t want to leave. Fillian stroked Gregory’s cheek, and he leaned into the touch, closing his beautiful eyes.

“I just wish that simple, gentle moments like this could go on forever,” Gregory whispered.

Fillian leaned closer, and Gregory lifted his chin. Their lips met gently. Fillian only meant to provide comfort and reassurance, but Gregory pressed into the kiss, deepening it. He went along with Gregory, giving him what he needed, and soon Gregory’s fingers slid through Fillian’s hair, the kiss growing hotter and more desperate as Gregory shook in Fillian’s arms, pouring more into the kiss, taking Fillian quickly down the road to desire.

“I need…,” Gregory whispered.

“I know. But is this a good idea right now? You’re vulnerable, and I won’t take advantage or let you do something you might regret.” No matter how much he wanted to take Gregory into his bedroom, strip the man naked, and blow their minds.

Gregory growled deep in his throat and lunged at Fillian, kissing him as he pressed him back on the sofa cushions. Damn, he seemed to have found his energy now, and it ran rampant all over Fillian, not that he was complaining.

Fillian managed to pause Gregory and got to his feet. Gregory stood as well, watching Fillian, looking deeply into his eyes as though he were searching for something. Then he took Fillian’s hand and led him toward the bedroom.

Fillian had to wonder what Gregory truly wanted, even as his heart beat faster and his breath quickened. Gregory was stunning in old jeans and a T-shirt that had seen better days, both of them hugging him tightly. Fillian took a deep breath as Gregory sat on the side of the bed and looked down at his shoes.

“Talk to me,” Fillian said gently. “Look me in the eyes and talk to me. Tell me what you want.” He gently touched Gregory’s chin just so he could look into his eyes.

“I… I need to check on the kids,” he said and hurried out of the room.

Fillian sighed and took his place sitting on the side of the bed, wondering if he should go home. He had had a tough relationship before, and at the moment, Gregory reminded him of Jeffrey. He was a nice enough guy, but Jeffrey had issues—lots of them. His parents had been very strict, watching his behavior, keeping him on the straight and narrow. At least that was what they thought they were doing. What they did was build up enough guilt in their son that he’d wanted to be with Fillian badly, but would back off again as guilt took over. Fillian had endured six months of the back-and-forth because he’d liked Jeffrey, but he couldn’t take the hot-and-cold-running boyfriend. It was just too much.

Gregory returned, closing the door.

“Are they asleep?” Fillian asked.

“Yes. Marnie was holding her doll, and Weston had his turtle.” He lowered his gaze again. “They were so peaceful and quiet. It was like that crap with my mother hadn’t happened.”

“Kids are resilient, and you have to know that you had nothing to do with that. It was all on your mother. You can’t let her behavior get to you, if for no other reason than you have to be the adult in the room for those two.” He pointed toward the other rooms. “You can’t let her get you down because you have to be strong for them.”

Gregory nodded. “But who’s strong for me?”

Fillian stood up, took a second to lock the door, and tugged Gregory into a kiss, pressing them together, holding Gregory as tightly as he could while kissing him with everything he had. Gregory closed his arms around him, and Fillian pushed Gregory back to the bed and then down onto the mattress. It was time that they put all their worries away, at least for a little while. Gregory needed a break, and Fillian was more than happy to provide.

“Is this what you really want?” Gregory asked as Fillian leaned over him. “I’m the parent of two kids, and I’m a mess.”

“Maybe, but you’re my mess,” Fillian growled and took Gregory’s lips once more, and within a few seconds, he felt Gregory give himself over to him. Fillian was determined to make Gregory’s decision one of the best he’d ever made.

“So you really think I’m a mess?” Gregory quipped.

Fillian rolled his eyes. “What I think is that you need to stop thinking about all that.” He met Gregory’s gaze, holding it in his own. “It’s time you try to let it all go.” He released Gregory and took his hands, raising them over Gregory’s head. “Put your hands together and hold them right there.” He let a little police officer creep into his voice.

Gregory swallowed. “Really?”

Fillian growled deep in his throat. “Yeah.” He tugged Gregory’s shirt from his grip and pulled it over his head, then wrapped it around his hands. He didn’t tie him or anything—Gregory could get out of the hold if he wanted. That wasn’t the point.

He took a few seconds to look Gregory over, his flat belly pale and dusted with light brown hair that disappeared into his jeans. Damn, he was stunning. Fillian took a second look before placing his hands on Gregory’s skin, slowly running them up his belly and chest, the muscles twitching under his touch. “You need to relax. You know I would never hurt you.”

“Uh-huh,” Gregory groaned softly.

“Then trust me. Put your head back, close your eyes, and just let yourself be.” He ran his hands up Gregory’s sides before trailing them over his pecs and tweaking both nipples, earning a soft moan. Damn, that was sexy, and he did it again, making Gregory quiver. “Sensitive…,” he whispered before going in for a taste, swirling his tongue around the now tight buds, giving them a little pinch that only made Gregory shake more.

“Fillian,” Gregory groaned as Fillian slipped his hands back down his belly and snapped open the top of his jeans. He let the fabric part, Gregory thrusting his hips forward. Fillian kissed him hard, pinning Gregory to the bed with his lips, letting his hands roam over the denim.

Gregory was big, long, and hard as hell. He whimpered, pressing into Fillian’s hand. Kissing him harder, Fillian eased down the zipper but otherwise left his pants right where they were. He was intent on taking his time, though Gregory seemed in a hurry. “Just relax. There’s plenty of time for everything. You and I are behind a locked door”—Fillian had made sure of that—“and it’s just you and me.” He kissed him again. “Breathe deeply, in… and out…. Just concentrate on that. In… and out… yeah. Let the oxygen get to your head and get rid of everything negative.” He kept his voice low. “Close your eyes.”

“Okay,” Gregory whispered. Fillian cradled his head in one arm, letting the other roam down his belly, teasing him as he tasted those succulent lips. “But I want….”

“I know you do, and you’ll get everything you desire… but slowly. No rushing and no worries.” Damn, he wanted Gregory to have a chance to breathe. His life had been running at top speed, and Fillian had had a front-row seat for the past few weeks. The man needed a break and a release. Fillian intended to give him both. “Do you think you can live with that?”

“You really are a sadist, you know that?” Gregory said, his lips curling upward slightly.

“Actually, I’m not. And don’t even think about calling me a tease, because I’m not that either. Remember, a tease doesn’t put out, and I have every intention of getting you so hot that when you do come, you’re going to worry about your mind melting.” He kissed away further words, sliding his hand down, cupping Gregory through his boxers.

The whimper against his lips was priceless. Fillian kissed him harder before pulling away. He smiled down at Gregory, loving the view of the sexy man laid out before him.

Slowly, because he had some mercy, he tugged off Gregory’s shoes and then his socks. He caressed his feet, running his thumbs over the pads. Then he slid his hands up his legs before pulling the jeans down and off and letting them drop to the floor. “You know, you’re magnificent.”

Gregory scoffed. “No, I’m not. I used to have time to work out, and now I carry kids and eat when I can, and I’m getting flabby.”

Fillian leaned over him. “Don’t give me any bull.” He leaned closer and sucked at one of Gregory’s nipples, then moved down his belly.

“Fillian,” Gregory whined. “Damn, you’re going to kill me.”

“I wouldn’t want that.” Fillian tugged off Gregory’s boxers, leaving him naked and gorgeous, his cock stretching toward his belly. “Is this what you wanted?” He gripped his length and stroked slowly.

Gregory sighed, putting his head back. “It’s been a long time….”

The hot length in his hand jumped at the attention, and Fillian smiled before he leaned forward, parting his lips and taking Gregory between them. He sucked him deep, then held still before easing off, doing it over and over. The sounds Gregory made were glorious, as was the way he reacted. The man was a live wire filled with energy and tension. “Then it’s time you had someone to care for you.” Fillian pulled off his shirt and let Gregory get a good look at him. Then he toed off his shoes and slipped his pants down his legs.

“Talk about magnificent,” Gregory whispered. “Damn….”

Fillian knew he looked good—he worked hard at it, and keeping fit was part of his job—but the heat in Gregory’s eyes was more than ample reward. “Like what you see?”

Gregory nodded, his gaze staying on him. That alone was exciting, but Gregory groaned and freed his hands, then sat up to tug Fillian to him before burying his face against Fillian’s skin, inhaling deeply.

Fillian carded his fingers through Gregory’s hair. “What do you want?” he whispered. Gregory lifted his gaze. “What will make you happy right now?” He stepped back and tugged Gregory to his feet, standing toe to toe with him. “You need to tell me.”

Gregory shook his head. His face turned cherry red. “We don’t talk about that sort of thing.”

Fillian closed the distance between them. “In here, we talk about everything. Nothing is off limits, and there is no shame or worry. This is a safe place no matter what.” He wrapped Gregory in his arms and propelled him back against the bed. Gregory tumbled onto the mattress once more. “Close your eyes and tell me what you want.”

“To forget,” Gregory answered.

Fillian didn’t need any more elaboration as he kissed Gregory into silence. If the man wanted to forget, he could make that happen. “Anything else?” Fillian cocked his eyebrows. “Tell me what it is you like.”

Gregory blinked at him.

“Are you a pitcher or a catcher? Do you have fantasies about a little pain with your pleasure?”

Gregory shook his head. “Nothing like that. Just….” His words tapered off. “I like being a catcher,” he finally said.

“Good, because I really like to pitch.” He got Gregory comfortable, his head resting on the pillows. He really was stunning, and Fillian’s mouth watered just looking at him. “I like to be the one in charge.” He held Gregory’s hands again. “But what I like most is seeing the fire in your eyes and hearing those little whimpers you make when something feels good.” He licked one of Gregory’s nipples, then sucked lightly. “Just like that.”

“You think you know me already?” Gregory asked.

Fillian smiled. “I know some things, and the rest are going to be my pleasure—and yours—as I find out.”

When he kissed Gregory again, it was like lightning shot between them. The electricity was undeniable. Gregory shook with it, and Fillian found his own control slipping. There was something about Gregory that made him want to make him happy. But it was more than that. He knew that Gregory had the potential to touch his heart, and that was frightening.

His past relationships hadn’t ended well, and he had a tendency to pick the wrong guys. But this felt so right here. Gregory even tasted right, his skin salty sweet, his lips wet but not too wet, the pressure perfect… and he tasted like ambrosia. Fillian slid down Gregory’s body, licking a trail down his chest and belly, loving the way his breath hitched. Damn, Gregory was responsive. He held his breath in anticipation, then moaned steadily as Fillian took him between his lips and sucked his long, thick cock farther and farther, sending quivers of excitement through him. It only made Fillian want to push him more.

“Fillian,” Gregory whimpered urgently, carding his fingers through Fillian’s hair, shaking intensely. He knew that tone of desperation, and Fillian sucked harder, his own desire rising at the sound. There was nothing sexier than a man nearing the intense relief of climax, and Fillian reveled in it as Gregory grew closer to the precipice. “I can’t….”

Fillian didn’t want him to. He bobbed his head as his mind clouded and pure instinct took over. He drew Gregory to the edge and held him there before taking him over. As Gregory tumbled into release, his own quickly descended on him, and Fillian swallowed hard as he throbbed through his own climax.

Gregory lay back on the bed, breathing deeply, spent, his eyes closed. Fillian lay next to him, unable to move. He listened to Gregory’s breathing, grateful the apartment was otherwise quiet. At least their intensity hadn’t made enough sound to wake the kids.

Gregory slipped under the covers and pulled them up over both of them. Then Fillian rolled over, cradling Gregory in his arms, wishing he could stay all night. It felt wonderful to have someone to hold and to be held back.

“Night,” Gregory whispered and kissed him gently. “Do you think we should talk about what just happened?”

Fillian held him tighter. “I don’t know that we have to now. Just close your eyes and rest.” The last thing he wanted was to dissect what had just happened. Not that he regretted it; he didn’t. But being with Gregory came with complications, and whether he was ready for it or not, he had just taken a further step to embroiling himself in them. He tried not to think too deeply.

“You should take your own advice and try to get some sleep. I know you have to get up for your shift early in the morning, and you’re going to need your rest if you’re to help keep yourself and everyone else safe from evildoers.” He smiled slightly.

“You make me sound like a superhero.” Fillian liked the sound of that, even if it was far from the truth.

“Maybe you are.”

“And what would my superhero name be?” He smirked, wondering what Gregory would come up with.

Gregory yawned and sighed softly. “I don’t know. You could be the Gay Crusader, fighting for truth and justice with a gun that shoots sparkles and sprinkles.” He nestled closer.

“Yeah… well… I’m no superhero.” He closed his eyes and tried to rest, but there was too much going on in his head. Still, after a long day and with another ahead of him, sleep finally came, and he let himself fall into it. All his worries and doubts would still be there when he woke, and there was nothing he could do about them now.

“Sure you are,” Gregory said, just loud enough for Fillian to hear.