18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Darren

"Hmm, maybe I should've removed your hoodie and T-shirt before pushing you back. Up," Christian demanded.

"I like you all bossy."

He rolled his eyes and lifted his arms. I mimicked him, allowing him to pull my hoodie and T-shirt over my head. "Are we getting naked?"

Christian nodded, and his smile was adorably smirky. He grabbed the hems of his sweatshirt and T-shirt together and pulled them over his head. But before we did anything, he went to his dresser, grabbed a hair tie sitting on top, and pulled back his growing red waves.

"It doesn't feel weird to fool around with your mom and grandparents downstairs?"

"Nope. They won't bother us. Do you want to stop?"

"I never want to stop with you. "

A blush covered his cheeks as he sucked in his bottom lip. He reached for the button of my jeans and popped it open before he unzipped me and pulled my jeans off, lifting my ass to help him.

"I swear, your jeans are bigger than I am."

I snorted a laugh. "That's a bit of an exaggeration." Despite laughing, I was a bundle of excited nerves. We've only given each other a couple of handies, but hadn't really explored beyond that or gotten fully naked yet.

After he pulled off my underwear, he stood there between my legs, gawking at my body. It was hard not to be a little self-conscious. I worked hard on my body, and while I'd been naked around the guys on the team, it was different with Christian. Not that I was insecure about how I looked, but this was sexual and completely new territory.

"C-can I put you in my mouth?" he asked.

I just nodded, fisting my hands on his bedspread, careful not to ruin all his work on my nails. My dick was pleased at the prospect.

When I was engulfed in warm, wet heat, my eyes rolled up into my head, and my toes curled. Everything was awkward, sloppy, and fucking perfect. Fire and electric tingles blanketed my body. This was, by far, better than handies.

As I got lost in Christian's determination and eagerness to turn me on, my hands went to his hair, tangling my fingers in his silky strands.

I struggled to breathe, and my heart raced, pumping blood throughout my body and centralizing straight to my dick.

It didn't take long to release. I slammed my lips closed to stifle my cry, and the sound coming out of me was guttural and desperate.

Christian sat up and wiped his wet and swollen lips with the back of his hand as I stared at him wide-eyed with a weak, numb body. "Y-you swallowed?"

He bobbed his head, looking at me with sheepish eyes. "Was I… not supposed to?"

"I don't know."

"Did you not like it?"

"I fucking loved it. It was perfect, Gorgeous."

Christian beamed. "Good. I want to do that again."

"You liked it?"

"I loved it, but it was hard, too. My jaw kind of hurts."

I pulled him to the bed and rolled over to kiss him, tasting my bitter essence on his tongue. Then I kissed his jaw as my hand slid under the band of his jeans and underwear, fisting him.

His eyes slid closed, his thick lashes fanning out above his cheeks. His kissable lips, so red and still swollen, were parted as he got lost in my touch. But no handies tonight.

I pulled out my hand, and he whimpered, making me smile. "I got you, Gorgeous."

After pulling off his jeans, I eased his underwear off. Christian tried to cover his body, but I wouldn't let him, pinning his hands to his side. "No hiding."

"Sorry…"

"And no apologizing. Love who you are, Chris. Grab what you need. We only have one body, one life, and no second chances. This is it. I'm telling myself this as much as I'm telling you. Always know I find you stunning."

His eyes went wide, and he nodded. "Okay."

Despite my bravado, I was nervous and afraid I wouldn't please him. After giving him a few pumps, I swallowed my fears with a twisting stomach as I swallowed him down.

Christian cried out and arched his back. "Oh, god… that's… ah…"

I had no fucking idea what I was doing, but I focused on areas where I knew I was sensitive. God, there was so much drool, and it was noisy. But his smell was unreal. If being turned on had a scent, I wanted to bottle it up.

Christian's body finally relaxed, and he pumped into my mouth. "Dare… Dare… "

My body thrummed with heat, happy that I could turn him on. His noises were so sweet and music to my ears. Soon, he spilled into me, and I tried to swallow it all. It tasted strange, sure, but it was all him.

With a last grunt, Christian's body melted into the mattress, and his hands forked through his hair. "Holy… yeah, that's so much better than hands, and hands are pretty good."

I rested my chin on his thigh and looked up at him. "Was that okay?"

He snorted. "It's more than okay. It was the best."

I sat up, climbed back into his bed, and tucked him against me. My fingers traveled over his soft, pale skin as he trailed his fingers over my chest. We didn't say anything as our hearts calmed down and our breathing normalized.

"I could hold you like this forever," I said.

"I want you to hold me like this forever."

My free hand lifted his chin to look at me. "You're going to be mine forever. There's no one in the world more perfect for me—no one in the world who balances me out. And no one calms me like you. We're going to get married one day, maybe have some kids. I never thought I ever wanted them, but with you…"

Christian chuckled and rolled on top of me. I fucking loved his naked body against mine, skin against skin.

"That's a big plan, Dare. We're only sixteen."

"I know what I want."

He smiled and pressed his palm to my cheek. "These are big dreams. They're good to have. Anything can happen, though."

I swallowed and frowned. "You don't see us together like that?"

"I definitely do. But I'm also a realist, as are you. Then again, you've always dreamed big, haven't you?"

"Someone like me has to, or else I'll be stuck in a rut like my parents."

He leaned up and pressed his lips to mine. We kissed slowly, exploring before pulling away. "I love your dreams, Dare. I love being a part of your big life."

I wrapped my arms tightly around him. No, I would never let him go. "I'll do whatever I can to make you happy."

"You make me very happy. If you hadn't persisted and done your best to show the beauty that you are, I would never have felt all this love."

The following day, I left my house and drove straight to Dillon's home. I needed someone to talk to who wasn't Christian.

I pulled up in front of a stone house that looked even older than Christian's place. It had huge trees in front, bare from the winter, and boxwood bushes were neatly planted everywhere.

I knocked on the door and Dillon's mom answered with a smile.

"Hey, Ms. C. Is Dillon around?"

"It's good to see you, Darren. Yes, he's in the barn with Cade."

"Thanks. I hope you had a good Christmas."

She frowned, but quickly covered it up. "Yes, it was… fine."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yes. I'm sure the boys would love to see you."

I took that as the dismissal it was and headed around to the back of the house and toward the big red barn. I opened the barn door and stepped inside. It was the first time I'd been in here. There were three horses, one was a Palomino, one was a chestnut Thoroughbred, and the other one was a black Arabian. I was greeted by two cats, one a calico and the other a mangy orange cat.

"Mom?" Dillon asked from above in the loft. I couldn't see him behind the bales of hay stacked up there.

"It's me, Darren."

He peeked down and smiled. "Come on up."

I climbed the ladder and found Cade resting his head on Dillon's lap as Dillon ran his fingers through Cade's curls. Cade barely acknowledged me as he stared out at the view of farmland, woods, and the Blue Ridge mountains in the distance.

"What's going on?" I asked. "Everything okay? Your mom didn't look happy."

Dillon sighed and nodded. "Yeah, it was a rough Christmas. Cade's dad is a dick. He and Mom have been fighting all the time since then… It's whatever."

"Did they find out…"

Dillon shook his head. "No, they don't know about us. Cade's dad is just neglectful, and it's taking its toll on Cade here. Mom's fed up with Jared and finally called him out on his shit."

"I'm sorry, man," I said to Cade, patting his back.

"It's fine," he mumbled. Clearly, it wasn't.

"So, what's going on?" Dillon asked.

"I came here to talk to you about something, but we can do this later."

Cade sat up and brushed his curls from his face. "No, you can talk. What's up?" He leaned against Dillon, who wrapped a protective arm around him and kissed his cheek.

Before, I would've been jealous seeing that, but now I was just fucking happy for them.

"When we get back to school after Christmas break, I want to come out. Christian deserves all of me. If we're going to love each other, I need to show it to the world."

Both of their eyes widened.

"Holy shit," Dillon said. "Are you sure about this? Coming out could risk everything you've worked for, Dare."

"I know, but I'd like to see them fucking try. Christian's worth it and I'd do anything for him. Besides, if I fail at football, I have my grades to fall back on. I can get into any school I want at this rate, but I want to go pro eventually."

"Jesus, Dare… going pro is awesome, but they're less accepting than high schoolers. "

"I'm not going to let even football get in the way of my love for Christian."

Cade looked up at Dillon with sad eyes. "I wish we could come out."

If they did, they would definitely have a tougher time than I would. I not only had my muscles to back me up, but Christian wasn't my stepbrother.

Dillon kissed the top of his head. "I know. Me, too." Then he pinged his blue eyes on me. "We'll back you up, Dare. If you come out, then you have our support."

Cade nodded in agreement. "Yep, you got it."

"Thanks, guys. I appreciate it, especially because Christian and I are going to need it. I'm going to have to go back into bullying mode to stop the shit in its tracks."

While I was terrified of losing all that I'd worked so hard for, I felt really good about this. It was like this was my final step into becoming the man I wanted to be—to be happy in my own skin and with who I was and to proudly display Christian at my side. While my goals had been my main drive, having Christian by my side gave me hope of finding happiness as well.