Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

JAMES

The reason I was happier than I could ever remember being—after spending an entire afternoon tolerating the company of my dickhead father—was sitting beside me in my car, smelling divine and looking beautiful.

I might have lost my mind during the course of the day, saying things I probably shouldn’t have said, but I was actually happy for once.

And feeling very selfish—if I had to put a word to it—because even the limited discussion of a marriage of convenience didn’t worry me. I already knew I wanted to keep her. I saw her face when I mentioned dissolution on the way over. I’d felt like such a bastard for using that word about our marriage. It was a lie.

My doubts and fears about bringing Winter into my life were being blown away bit by bit. The way she’d handled my dad today was nothing short of brilliant. Nobody pushed Winter Blackstone around and had an easy time of it. And I started toying with the idea that maybe it could work with us. My father’s threat wasn’t going away. I could see how ecstatic he was at the prospect of having a Blackstone in the family. Hell, he’d probably be calling me before Monday to ask the date we’d chosen for our big day. Not happening, Dad.

Jesus…

No doubt he was eying campaign contributions from her extremely wealthy family. Also not happening. He would find—when and if he ever saw the terms of our prenup—that wouldn’t be the case.

Because one thing was crystal clear.

Money was absolutely not on my list of reasons for marrying Winter.

Watching her earlier, charming my father speechless, had been a thing of triumph I suddenly had some hope for my future.

Why?

Because of the beautiful, sweet, smart, and compassionate girl beside me. Winter had a way of making the heaviest burdens feel lighter. She was responsible for the hopeless ache throbbing inside my heart feel as if it was disappearing. I hadn’t felt this optimistic in years, so I knew it was all because of her.

I glanced over to find her studying me. She didn’t seem upset or distressed, but if I had to guess, she was thinking about our day and processing everything that had been said. Winter was a thinker. Her emotions held weight in her decisions, yes, but she worked things through logically before acting on them.

"Thank you for agreeing to come with me today. It was the best Thanksgiving I can remember."

Her mouth curled into a half-smile and then fell away. "You’re welcome. Thank you for inviting me to the strangest Thanksgiving I can remember."

I couldn’t help the short laugh that escaped. "Like I said to you while we were there, they think you’re perfect. My mother adores you, and my father was charmed into being polite, and even threw out a couple of compliments; what could possibly be strange about that?" We both knew I was joking, even though what I’d just said was the straight-up truth.

"Oh, I don’t know," she said with a sexy tilt of her head. "How about why was I hit with the strangest impression…several times, mind you…that your parents think we’re a couple and getting married. Oh, and starting a family of children who will bloody themselves from time to time." She folded her arms beneath her breasts and waited for me to start explaining.

Off-the-goddamn-charts gorgeous.

And if I wasn’t driving us into the city right now, I’d have her arms pinned and my tongue down her throat. I’d be kissing her breathless until I had my fill…which would be a very long fucking time.

This was my girl, and she really was perfect in every way. I had to make this relationship work—for the both of us. If that meant giving up something I thought I had to have in order to be complete, then I’d give it up.

Winter superseded that need.

And it was that simple.

The time for putting her off was over, and she certainly deserved some sort of explanation after the shitshow she’d just put up with. "You’re right, Win, my parents do think we are a couple…and furthermore, they fully believe we’re about to announce an engagement."

"Yeah, that came through loud and clear, but what I want to know is why. Where is it coming from, James? I thought you came up with the idea while we were in the car on our way to their house. But they obviously knew before I did."

I forced the embarrassment and shame aside for the moment and remembered this was Winter I was confiding in. She would never judge me based on the actions of my father. She wasn’t that kind of person. "My father will soon announce his bid for a seat in the United States Senate. He gave me the task of settling down, in the best interests of his campaign, which will run on a platform of family based values. It’s all bullshit, but he will find a way to force the issue somehow. Trust me, I’ve had firsthand experience."

She took a moment to absorb that bombshell before asking me a question that brought emotions to the surface that weren’t welcome right now—or ever. The shit I kept locked up in a very dark place. "Like what happened with Leah… You mean your father had a hand in what she did to you?"

I stared at the road, forcing the words out of my mouth in order to answer her without subjecting her to the bitter poison of the truth. "Yes. To both questions."

The heat of her eyes on me burned, but I couldn’t face her. I might be able to confide in her, but that didn’t mean I was comfortable doing it. "And you’re just going to go along with his plans for you?" Again, I felt the pull of her eyes willing me to look at her before she added, "That doesn’t sound like you at all, James."

"You’re right, it isn’t me," I answered, grateful she seemed to have dropped Leah as a topic for discussion. I didn’t want to talk about Leah with Winter. In fact, I didn’t need to talk about or think about Leah ever again.

"So why are you even considering going along with your father’s plan for you?"

Because…there’s you.

"His demand that I choose someone got me thinking about you. For the last couple of weeks, I’ve thought about you a lot, but I didn’t want to influence you in any way. That wouldn’t be fair. And like I’ve told you before, I’d never consciously do something to hurt you, but I’m not going to marry just anybody in order to please my father."

"And you were thinking of…of m-me?"

"Winter, you’re the only one I thought of."

"Oh," she said softly as she took in the idea. At least she wasn’t screaming for me to let her out of the car so she could get away from me. Overall, she was taking this news well. Is that because she does actually love me?

"Look, I don’t want to get married at all, but if I have to"—I let that sink in for a second—"and there’s an additional bonus of being able to help you gain access to your trust, then yes, I would marry you."

"But you didn’t even ask me to come along to your family’s Thanksgiving until this morn"—she paused as she figured out the chain of events— "because you had already decided to defy him."

"You’re very astute, but then I’ve always known that about you."

"You have?" Her shy question made my cock wake up. This marriage talk was sending the blood in my body straight southward. If we were married? I sure as fuck wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off her. Not after where my hands were last night. Touching her, bringing her to a shattering orgasm, was something I wanted again, even if I didn’t deserve it. Even if I had to do it all vanilla. There. Admitting it to myself wasn’t as bad as I’d thought it would be.

"But yeah, I’d decided to defy my father. He gave me an ultimatum to bring my choice with me to Thanksgiving so they could meet her." I gripped the steering wheel and squeezed until the leather protested with a squeak. "I know that sounds so fucking archaic and absurd, but it’s exactly what he said to me three weeks ago."

"Oh my God, your dad is using you for his own gain." She couldn’t mask her revulsion, and honestly, I’d be worried if she wasn’t fucking horrified.

"I know." I reached over and gave her hand a squeeze. "I would’ve gone alone today. I only go there for my mother’s benefit anyway."

"And then I showed up bleeding last night, and you decided you could take me along and get your father off your back?" I could see her tilting her head at me in question from my peripheral vision. Evidently, Winter wasn’t the only one needing some eye contact while we talked. I couldn’t wait to get her home and in my arms close against me. More than anything, I wanted to kiss her. It was weird, but I wanted that—the freedom to kiss her and not have it be this undecided taboo between us.

"Not exactly, but you’re in the general vicinity of the truth." This time I turned toward her, and even in the dim light inside the car…she took my breath away. Her pretty eyes glittered at me, so expressive and questioning. But not in a judgmental way. She wanted some answers as anyone would. "I hoped I could avoid a confrontation with my father over the stupid shit he pulls with me constantly, but you need to know that I have absolutely no problem telling my dad to leave me alone, and that I won’t be getting married to support his political aspirations. That was my first plan anyway. He doesn’t dictate to me."

I had to drag my eyes away from her and back onto the road.

She sighed and then whispered, "I thought we were just friends. That you only thought of me as your best friend’s little sister. So what made you decide to lead him into thinking that we are together?"

Haven’t thought of you like that for years, beautiful. But now’s not the time...

"It was something you did actually…well, something you said to me last night that changed my mind." The gorgeous vision of her coming apart for me while saying she loved me had done things to my heart. Even now, nearly twenty-four hours later, the dull ache hadn’t subsided.

"Oh no, James, what did I say?" There was panic in her voice.

"No. I’m not telling you while I’m driving. I need to be able to look at you when we talk about what happened last night."

"You’re scaring me."

"Nothing to be scared of, Win. It’s just me, remember? What did I tell you before we arrived at my parents’ earlier?" I pegged her with a hard look.

"You’ll never do anything to hurt me," she answered in a subdued voice along with the unmistakable signs of fighting off the urge to squirm in her seat. Fuck. That simple move of hers was all it took to send a spike of hot lust straight down the length of my cock. Mine. Everything she did—or didn’t do—had the same effect on me, apparently. And she has absolutely no idea.

"That’s right, beautiful one. Don’t you forget it. If I make a decision that involves you, it will always be something meant in the spirit of your protection and with your happiness in mind."

She nodded easily. Or maybemore of an act of submission. "I will remember, James," she answered quietly before resting her hands gracefully in her lap and relaxing into the seat for the remainder of the drive home.

Yep.I could read the signs all right. By the time we’d made it back, I had a better understanding about her behaviors and body language. It led me into crazy fantasies of tying her to my bed and fucking her into the mattress, yes, but that attraction had been present for a while in me. This was something far more than mere attraction.

I’d bet it all on the idea that Winter was naturally submissive with me and would be when it came to sex. I’d seen it. After spending so much time with her in close contact, my mind was running rampant with filthy thoughts. And how in the holy hell was I supposed to subdue the images of us together rolling through my head like an 8mm porno? Pointless to even try, asshole.

Jesus fuck…

We hadn’t even gotten out of the car before the plans changed yet again. I was just about to open my mouth and ask her if she’d like to come up to my place when her phone pinged. I watched her expression as she read it, and even predicted what it would be about.

"Lucas wants to pick me up tonight instead of in the morning," she said as she read his text aloud. "He says nine o’clock at BGE. That means I have less than two hours to get changed, pack a bag, and make it to the helipad." She looked at me and smiled one of her half-smiles I found so sexy.

"All right, I’ll take you." I hated she was leaving, but the rational part of my brain knew it was wiser. What in the hell was I thinking anyway? That she would stay over at my place? Sleep in my bed? Let me have her any way I wanted? You’re a delusional fucking freak for even going there in your head.

"Thank you, James," she answered as she texted him back to let him know she’d be there. Once she was done, she sunk into the heated leather and gave me her full attention. She appeared relaxed, but I knew she hadn’t forgotten what I’d promised her earlier—that we would talk about things.

"You’re welcome, but you know we don’t have anywhere close to enough time for our talk like I promised you. I don’t want to rush it, because it’s important, and we need some time to process everything." I picked up her hand and held it. Lucas might have changed the plans for our quiet evening of soul-baring conversation, but in a way, I was relieved. Talking about what had happened the previous night would have to wait. The timing was way off for any kind of serious conversation about the future. Deciding if we were getting married any time soon certainly qualified as serious.

"I know that, but I really need to know what’s going on here…between us. You kissed me earlier and it—"

"What about the kiss?" It was rude of me to ask her the question after cutting her off from answering, but suddenly I was desperate to know what she’d thought of it.

"It was good." I didn’t miss the flush that crept up her neck to color her cheeks. Shy Winter did very dirty things to my imagination. Yet, I also saw trust in her expression. She wasn’t submitting to me because she felt weakened by me. Less than me. Unlike my mother with my father. I now knew how attracted Winter was to me, and by the end of the night, she’d have no doubt how fucking gorgeous I saw her. She’d known me a long time, knew I was fairly serious for the most part, and knew I’d behaved differently with her today. But for now, I had to tease her a little more. I had to see her fire.

"Well, I should hope it was good, because you begged me to do it."

"Oh my God, I did not." She ripped her hand out of mine and glared at me.

I couldn’t help laughing at her outraged expression. "Oh yes, you did, beautiful." I nodded slowly, allowing myself the luxury of taking my fill of looking at her. If I could, I’d take her upstairs and lock her inside my apartment and keep her with me until we’d hashed out every detail of how this would roll out—preferably naked or pretty fucking close to naked.

Her, me, us—together.

Because she was already mine, and if anyone was going to have Winter Blackstone, that man would be me.

It will be me.