Chapter Four

Cade

T hen - Age Sixteen

"Please, please, please," January pleads, her hands clasped like she's praying, and those big, hopeful green eyes turned on Titan. She pokes her bottom lip out and bounces on the balls of her feet, causing her ponytail to sway back and forth. "Please, Titan."

"No way." He crosses his arms over his chest to scowl down at his little sister. "I'm not dressing up in tights just so you can run around in a tutu and wings all night."

"But it's Peter Pan and Tinkerbell!" January argues, stomping her foot.

"Nope," Titan says, holding his ground.

"I'll be your best friend forever," she says, refusing to give up.

"I've already got a best friend." Titan jerks his thumb in my direction.

"But–"

"Not happening, baby sister."

January's face falls into a sad mask of dejection, her shoulders slumping. She drops back down to her heels, eyeing the green and yellow Tinkerbell costume like it's the most adorable thing she's ever seen.

I press my palm to my heart and rub, trying to ease the way it aches at the sad look on her face.

"I'll be too old to trick-or-treat next year," she mumbles to herself.

"I'll do it," I blurt before I can stop myself.

Titan and January both turn to me, gaping.

"I'll do it," I repeat.

"Really?"

Hell no.

"Yeah," I mutter, unable to stop myself when she's staring up at me with so much hope in those green eyes of hers. "Why not?"

Titan glances at me, and then at January, and then to the Peter Pan costume hanging on the rack. He throws his head back and laughs loudly.

January spins on him, glaring daggers.

Titan bites his lip to hold back his laughter and then holds up his hands like he's surrendering. He's still chuckling when he turns and walks further down the Halloween aisle. The jerk.

"You'd really do that for me?" January asks, her voice small. A little note of awe bleeds through. Her expression matches, wonder overtaking that heart-shaped face and making my chest swell with pride.

"Yeah, little monster," I tell her, rubbing my heart when it aches for an entirely different reason this time. She's so pretty with her long blonde hair and big green eyes. A patch of freckles runs across her nose. I know she's Titan's little sister, but when she looks at me like I'm her hero…well, I'd probably do just about anything to make her keep looking at me like that.

I don't say that though. Titan would kill me. But even though she's only twelve, she's the coolest girl I know. She's sweet and funny, and smart as hell. Other girls only care about how they look or what they're wearing or about dating whoever will make them the most popular, but not January. She doesn't care about any of that.

She talks to me about shit that matters and listens to what I have to say. I think she knows more about me than even Titan does. I like her a lot.

A bright smile stretches across her face, lighting her up from the inside out. She darts forward and flings her arms around me, hugging me tightly. Before I can return the embrace, she steps back, her face flushing like she's embarrassed.

"You don't have to dress up with me, but thank you for offering," she says, biting her lip. And then she sighs. "I wish Titan didn't think he was too cool to dress up now. I miss when we all used to go trick-or-treating together. It'd be fun to do it one final time, you know?"

I kind of miss it too. We always had fun, running around the neighborhood with pillowcases full of candy. Titan always wanted to be something scary, but not January. She only ever wanted to be book characters…Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz or Alice from Alice and Wonderland .

"I want to do it." I tug on her ponytail. "It'll be fun. We'll dress up like we did when we were younger. I bet we can even convince Mark and Quan to go with us." Boots was picked up for stealing a pair of shoes a couple days ago, so he's in juvie again. If he was here, I know he'd go too.

"Really?" she asks, her expression wavering between hope and doubt.

"Yeah." I smile. "Titan won't think it's lame if everyone is going."

"Okay," she agrees and then snags the Tinkerbell costume she wants from the shelf, smiling at me almost shyly. "You don't have to be Peter Pan for me though, Cade. You can dress up however you want."

"Are you kidding?" I bluster, grabbing the bright green costume from the shelf and draping it over my arm. "I'm going to make a fucking awesome Peter Pan."

"You look handsome." Ma Lucia brown eyes light up when I step out of the bathroom, jerking on the ridiculous costume I let January talk me into wearing. I look like a forest vomited on me. The entire costume is green and itchy as hell. I'm never going to live this shit down, but January has been so excited about tonight. She's been on cloud nine all week.

She's so easy to please. It's honestly adorable.

"Thanks," I mutter, shoving the weird feather cap down on my head.

Ma Lucia's lips twitch, mirth dancing through her expression. She knows January has me wrapped around her little finger and always has. Ma Lucia doesn't say anything though. Instead, she hands me a pillowcase and a handful of chocolate candy bars for January.

"You watch out for that sweet little girl, Michael," she orders me.

"Yes, ma'am." I kiss her on the cheek and promise to be home by eleven.

"You kids have fun," she calls after me as I close the front door behind me. It's barely even dark yet, but we're all meeting at Titan and January's in a few minutes. I jog down the steps and then cross the yard to their yellow bungalow.

Titan flings the front door open when I knock, his dark green eyes running up and down, taking in my costume. "Jesus Christ, you're actually wearing the tights," he mumbles, laughing loudly. "I can't believe you let her talk you into this shit."

"Man, fuck you," I mutter, bumping him out of the way with my shoulder. Despite all his protests, January convinced him, Quan, and Mark to dress up as the Lost Boys. They all drew the line at tights, but like me, Titan's dressed in a tunic with a ridiculous hat on his head, though his tunic and hat are brown instead of green. How he fit the hat over his spiky hair, I don't know, but he did. He's wearing his usual jeans beneath his tunic and boots instead of the felt and rubber shoes that came with the costume.

Thank God those didn't fit me. They look like elf shoes.

When I move past his bulky frame, I see Quan and Mark sprawled on the couch in their tunics. Mark's wearing his hat, but Quan's braids are tied up in a complicated design, making it impossible to fit his hat over them. With Quan's big ears and his brown tunic, he looks like an elf.

"Where's January?" I ask Titan, who's still laughing his ass off.

Mark points toward the hallway, his normally happy expression turning sour. "She won't come out. Mandy was here earlier."

I turn toward Titan, shooting him a dirty look. Mandy Wright is a world class bitch to January when she thinks no one is paying attention. I've told Titan a thousand times to keep her away from his little sister, but he's determined to sleep with Mandy, so he doesn't listen. Every time she comes around, she's mean to January. It pisses me off.

It pisses Titan off too, but Mandy bats her lashes and apologizes, and he forgives her for it. He puts up with her shit a lot better than I do. She gets on my nerves.

"I didn't invite her, man," he says, sobering when he notices my expression.

"What'd she do this time?" I demand, knowing damn well January didn't go to hide out in her bedroom for the fun of it.

"She was teasing her about dressing up like a fairy," Titan mutters.

"She said January might be short enough to pass for five, but she's too old and fat to dress up like a child and make all of us do it too," Quan says, not editing like Titan does. He rolls his eyes. He doesn't like Mandy much either. "She was a bitch about it."

"She made her cry," Mark agrees, not sounding any happier than Quan about that.

"You need to get her under control," I snap at Titan, beyond pissed that she's ruined something else for January. "Your sister doesn't deserve that shit from her."

"I know." Guilt whispers through his expression. "I kicked her ass out of here and told her not to come back."

I grunt instead of responding because we both know he'll be right back to trying to get in her pants in a few weeks. He loves his sister, but he's had a thing for Mandy since we were little. I don't know why he won't just let it ride, but he won't. She crooks her finger, and he comes running.

"I'll talk to January," I mutter, already headed toward her bedroom.

Titan sighs in audible relief. Similar sighs echo from Mark and Quan.

I shake my head and stalk toward her room.

"Go away!" she yells when I tap on the door.

"It's me, little monster," I call to her, unable to fight a smile. She always tells me to go away, but she never means it. "Can I come in?"

I hear her sniffle from inside and my smile slips.

"Come in," she calls a moment later.

I crack the door open and poke my head in to find her sitting at the little vanity on the far side of the room. As soon as I see her, I stop walking. She's got her hair up in a bun like Tinkerbell's, with blonde strands waving wildly around her face. Her mom must have let her put on makeup because her eyelids are glittery and so are her rosy cheekbones. Her costume is shorter than I expected, barely reaching mid-thigh on her. With the glittery wings and her makeup, she looks like an angel. Her little green heels match the costume.

"You look beautiful," I whisper, unable to stop myself.

Her cheeks flush darker, her red-rimmed eyes bouncing up to meet mine.

I clear my throat, a little embarrassed at how raspy my voice sounds, and then just stand there because I'm not sure what else to say and I don't want to take it back. She does look beautiful.

"Do you really think so?" she asks after a moment, her voice small and worried. Her gaze drops from mine, hiding her eyes from me. "Mandy said I look dumb and fat."

I really don't like that girl.

"Mandy said that because she's a jealous bitch. You know she hates not being the prettiest girl in the room," I remind her, taking another step into her room and then another. When I'm standing beside her, I reach out to tug on her hair like usual…only I don't do that this time. Instead, I tuck a wavy strand behind her ear and then tilt her face up so she's looking at me again. "You don't look dumb, and you aren't fat. There isn't a single thing wrong with your body. You look like an angel. You're so damn beautiful, baby girl."

"I…" Her wide eyes catch mine and hold, her blush deepening.

My heart pounds like a drum, so loudly I'm surprised she doesn't hear it as she stares up at me. I know I need to step back and chill, but I can't seem to make myself do it. I can't seem to make myself stop staring at her either. "Don't ever let her or anyone else make you doubt yourself, January. There is nothing wrong with the way you look. She just fucking hates that she'll never be half as beautiful as you."

I have to fight the urge to lean forward and press my lips to hers. She's way too young, and she's Titan's sister. He'd kill me if he ever found out that I feel the way I do. But I can't fucking help it.

Thinking about Titan seems to break the spell she's weaving over me without even trying. I step back and clear my throat roughly.

"Thank you," she whispers, blinking. And then her gaze falls on the chocolate candy bars I'm still holding. "Are those for me?"

I laugh at the hopeful sound of her voice and hold them out to her. "From Ma Lucia," I murmur and then grin. "But you have to share."

"You always say that."

"Because you never share." She hates sharing chocolate. I know all of her hiding places, but I keep her secrets for her.

She giggles and then drops all the candy bars into her Halloween pillowcase, giving me the most innocent wide-eyed look she can muster. I just shake my head and laugh softly.

"Are we going or not?" Titan yells from the living room. "This shirt is giving me a rash."

"In a minute!" I yell back, rolling my eyes, which makes January giggle again. He's so impatient. I hold a hand out to her. "You ready to go ransack the neighborhood with your Lost Boys, Tink?"

January bites her lip and looks up at me, nodding. She reaches out and places her hand in mine, allowing me to pull her to her feet. Even in her heels, she barely comes up to my chest. I'll never tell her, but she looks like a real-life fairy, something magical and precious.

Ma Lucia always makes me promise to take care of her, but I would even if she didn't ask. January needs someone to keep her safe so a little of that magic of hers brightens up the neighborhood.

"You look handsome in your costume," January says.

"Thanks," I mumble, blushing. Before I can say anything else, she reaches out and hugs me. This time, I manage to wrap an arm around her. She rises up on her tiptoes and places her lips against my cheek in a quick peck.

"Thank you for always being nice to me, Cade," she whispers, and then she releases me and darts out the bedroom door, yelling that she's ready to go.

No, I don't simply like her. I think I love her.