Chapter 16

Sage

There's no way I can explain what drove me so hard to keep him and Sorin alive without telling Jodah about Mr. Griffith. I hadn't lied when I said everyone leaves me. My parents may not have physically left, but they certainly did emotionally. Every boyfriend I ever had—not that there were many—was the one who broke things off. The only friend who stuck around over the years was Makayla and even now, she's gone, leaving me with no one. With not a single person who cared about me. Not until London, Zara, Remi, and Maeve.

Not until Jodah.

What if telling him changes the way he looks at me? No one has treated me the way Jodah does. Like he's proud of me. As though I'm important.

We finally make it through the snow to his parents' tent. Smoke rises from the venting hole at the top and the scent of cooked meat and something else comes from the elders' central fire that sits within the horseshoe shape created by each of their homes.

During the warm season, most of them eat at the main central fire with the rest of the tribe, but Jodah explained that they tend to remain here during the cold season. Their bones are getting too old to walk the length of the village twice. I like it back here though. It's peaceful. And the remaining elders are so kind.

Nellora steps out and rushes forward with her arms outstretched and her tail swinging wildly. She comes to me first, to my surprise, and embraces me, something she must have picked up from us humans. Hugs don't seem to be a thing for the Tavikhi. "I am so happy that you have returned. Did Jodah tell you we have a surprise for you?"

I laugh lightly and squeeze her back. "He might have mentioned something about it."

She releases me and clasps my arms. "We very much hope you like it."

"I'm sure it's going to be wonderful." Whatever it is, it has her so excited. Which means, even if I hate it, I will never let her know. I wouldn't do anything to hurt her feelings—or Jodah's. They have been far too kind to me.

Nellora lets go and embraces her son. Jodah is at least six inches taller than his mother. They look so sweet together. An image of what our children might look like next to us enters my mind. Zara and I briefly talked about the possibility of the Tavikhi and us humans having kids, but up until this second, it had been an abstract thought.

Will they have my red hair? Or maybe a strawberry blonde that's a combination of ours. And what about a tail? Will they be as tall as their father or closer to a human's height? Of course, that means Jodah and I have to have sex first.

Great. Now I'm going to be thinking about having sex with my mate while having dinner with his parents.

Nellora leads us into the tent.

Gitesh lies in his furs like he had the last time I was here. Except he doesn't smile at our arrival. In fact, his gaze appears unfocused and there's a blank stare on his face. Like he's not even aware of our presence.

I glance at Jodah. He studies his father before turning to Nellora, whose head shake is barely noticeable. Sorrow is etched in every facet of her face. This must be what Jodah meant when he said his father was ill. It isn't just him missing a leg.

"Come and sit. We will eat," Nellora says breaking up the tense silence and gestures toward the fur she has laid out for us.

"Is there anything I can help with?" It's obvious she does so much for Gitesh, but who takes care of her?

She clasps my hands. "Only enjoy your surprise."

I nod and after a brief hesitation, settle onto the ground with my legs tucked in beside me. Jodah exits the tent leaving me with Nellora and Gitesh. She pours several wooden cups full of water and passes one to me and sets a second at my side. She takes a third to her husband.

Unlike the last time I was here, he doesn't feed himself. Nellora holds the cup to his mouth. She does it with the practiced ease of someone used to the task. I wish there was something I could do. It doesn't feel right that I just sit here.

"It must be difficult at times." I'm not sure I should speak about it, but I also think how hard Nellora works should be acknowledged. "Seeing the person you love become so ill."

She smiles at me, but it's marked with sorrow. "Deeka tests all of us in some way. But she is always right there by our side. Guiding us. Loving us. It does make the difficult days a little easier to bear."

I admire how devout the Tavikhi are to their goddess even if I don't share their same belief. "Whenever you need a break, even if it's for nothing more than a walk around the village, please tell me. I would be honored to sit with Gitesh for you."

"Thank you, daughter."

The flap of the tent lifts and Jodah steps through balancing several bowls on his arm. Nellora quickly rises to take a couple from him. He sits next to me and hands one over. An unfamiliar scent comes from it. It's meat, but something more. I glance down and study the food. There is a small amount of the meat I smelled, but also with it are long, narrow rectangular pieces of an unidentifiable yellowish object.

"I spoke with the shefira and the other human females," Jodah says. "Maeve helped me to find a root vegetable, dreri fat, and an herb she said is similar in flavor to what you call salt. The females and I worked together and according to Zara, this is the closest thing to what you said tastes like a french fry."

What? I jerk my head up to stare at him. "A french fry?"

Jodah nods. "You spoke of these root vegetables before and how much you loved them. I wanted to see if there was something similar that grew here. They may not be the best french fry you have ever tasted, but I hope that you enjoy it."

My eyes sting with unshed tears and my throat clogs with emotion. The fact that he not only remembered but would do this for me means more than he could ever imagine. Suddenly there's this explosion of light. It's so bright I swear it illuminates the whole tent, blinding us all, but neither Jodah, Nellora, nor Gitesh appears affected. It's as though they aren't able to see it. Only I can.

"Sage, is all well? Is it the wrong thing? The shefira and others assured me it was."

I blink away the brightness, black spots dancing in my vision, and try to focus on Jodah. Slowly the blurriness goes away and I can see him clearly, but there is still this warm glow around me. There's also a strong emotion welling up inside as though it too is ready to burst out of me. Worry is etched on his beautiful face. Unable to help myself, I burst into tears.

Through sobs I manage to choke out words. "This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you so much."

He scoots over and wraps his arms around me while I cry. Finally my tears stop and I swipe them away. I lift my head to meet his gaze. He leans down and kisses me sweetly. Far too soon, Jodah draws back and his mouth curls up in the corners. "You have not yet tasted them. They may be terrible and then you will not be thanking me for bringing you something so awful."

My head rattles. "I don't have to taste them to know they're perfect. They're going to be perfect because you made them."

Afraid they'll get too cold, I pick up one of the "french fries" and take a bite. I chew slowly gauging the flavors on my tongue. There's a hint of sweetness to them and the seasoning isn't quite salty, but it's still delicious. It's been fried to the exact amount of crispiness on the outside to balance out the soft center. It may not be a real fry, but it's definitely the next best thing.

"Are you too disgusted with the taste that you are trying not to expel it?" Jodah chuckles as does Nellora.

I glance between the two of them. Nellora leans forward as though she can't wait to hear what I think. My mate, on the other hand, is worrying his lips in an entirely human gesture. I pick up another and pop it in my mouth. "It's absolutely delicious.Truly, they are wonderful. Thank you again for being so thoughtful."

"You are welcome."

We all return to our meals. Jodah accepts my offer to try a "french fry". I can tell it's not to his taste, but he does his best to hide it. Nellora helps Gitesh eat in between her own bites. Despite that, the atmosphere is cozy with the small fire burning in the center of the tent and the warmth that is emanating from inside me. While I eat, I try to figure out what is going on. This weirdness is coming from the same place where my heartburn has been settling. Right in the center of my chest. It doesn't hurt, but I don't understand what's causing it.

Conversation varies between when Jodah might be able to return to hunting, London's progress with developing writing tools for the kits, as well as when the Bohnari might visit next. Apparently they come right at the end of the cold season. I'm curious about the people on the neighboring planet.

Finally, I've eaten the last of my pseudo french fries and whatever meat that was served with it. I try not to ask. Nellora moves to rise, but I stop her.

"Please. Stay. I'll take care of all this."

She lowers herself and I gather up everyone's empty bowls, stack them in a single pile, and take them out to elders' central fire. A large bucket of hot water sits next to it as well as a small basket of the green berries we all use as soap. Jodah comes to a stop next to me.

"I will help."

"Thank you."

Together we wash our dishes as well as the rest of the elders' who bring them to us. I'm happy to do what I can so they're able to return to the warmth of their homes. It is so sweet to watch them walk back to their tents with their tails entwined. I glance at Jodah's. The long length of it twitches and my gaze travels from the root of it to the blunt tip. A sudden image of that tail rubbing along certain parts of me makes my clit pulse and throb. I shift at the heat between my thighs.

Remi's alluded to what the Tavikhi's tails can do and even though she doesn't have a mate yet, Zara has made more than one suggestive comment about the naughty tail. My cheeks heat imagining all it can do. And I have the most vivid imagination.