Chapter 29

J asmine tightened around his fingers, her teeth sinking down on his shoulder in an attempt to mute her scream as she came. The bite burned, and Liam fucking loved every second of it.

"That's one," he said, when her breathing slowed again. "Lose count and we start over."

"Oh fuck."

He spun her around and laid her on her back, moving down her body and kissing everywhere he passed. Their record, so far, was five, and they were determined to obliterate it.

It was Monday, and they'd both taken the day off from work since they'd planned to pick Bray up that morning. Liam had the whole week off, at Maggie's insistence. " Pawternity leave ," she'd called it.

His dad had tried to get Jasmine to take the same, but she'd refused, claiming she had too much to do because of some case they were working on. Liam was pretty sure it had more to do with staying busy, so she could spend a little less time in her head, but at least they had the day together. Not that they needed the time to get used to being puppy parents: Bray had claimed a spot on the arm of the couch and seemed content to sleep for as long as physically possible.

Which was fine with Liam: he had plans to make Jasmine come at least six times, and, once she was nice and relaxed, broach the topic of her panic attack yesterday.

He'd been ready to jump in his car and break every traffic law to get to her when he'd answered the phone and heard her crying, struggling to breathe. But by the time he'd picked her up, she'd seemed fine. A little worn out, maybe, but otherwise just happy to see him. Words couldn't describe how relieved he'd been to see she was okay, but that hadn't stopped his worry about why she'd had the panic attack in the first place.

That was a topic for later, though. For now…

He caught her clit in his teeth and she cried out, fisting the blankets. Though he loved to see her struggle against the cuffs when he restrained her, he wanted her to fight against every single orgasm this time.

"I'm going to make you come over and over, darling."

"Promises, promises," she gasped, moaning as he roughly parted her legs and slapped her pussy.

He'd been planning to build her up slowly, make her come on his fingers, his tongue, maybe a toy or two, before pressing his cock inside her. But he couldn't wait.

He lined his cock up and thrust inside her, Jasmine's eyes flying open in surprise. Good. It wasn't going to take much. He could feel how close she was in the way her pussy hugged his cock, in the way her thighs trembled. But she was fighting it, her jaw set, her fists clenched.

Game fucking on .

"You think you can hold back? Think again, Jasmine. I'm not asking nicely for you to come," he said, his voice low and rough. "I'm fucking making you." He fucked her harder, and she cried out, her head twisting on the pillow as he fucked her harder.

"Is that all you've got?"

Liam leaned in closer so he could grip her face and force her to look at him. He brushed his thumb across her lip. "Admit it, darling. You're desperate for it. You love being my filthy fucking toy and making a mess all over me. You love that I can make you do whatever I want." She whimpered, her eyes glazing over, her resolve slowly shattering. "Now fucking come ." He gave her a feather-light slap on the cheek and she splintered, the strength of her orgasm taking him by surprise. He pulled out of her and cursed as she squirted all over the bed. Holy shit. Liam had to squeeze his eyes together and take several deep breaths to stop himself from coming on the spot. They had a long way to go before he got to come.

He kissed the cheek he'd slapped as Jasmine came down slowly, eyes wide and panting. Liam stood up, walking backward to the dresser where he'd laid a bunch of stuff out before they'd started. Her body shook with the aftershocks. "Count, Jasmine. "

"Two," she said sleepily, then shot up, gasping as Liam pressed a vibrator to her clit and turning it on low. "Liam! I can't, I— Fuck ."

"I know you have more than that in you. Are you tapping out?"

"Never," she promised through gritted teeth. "I can take it."

"Prove it," he said with a low, wicked laugh, and cranked the vibrator up to full power.

" C an we talk about what happened yesterday?"

Jasmine turned her head to look at him, her hair tickling his nose. "I thought we were supposed to talk about shit before sex."

Liam plastered what he hoped was an innocent expression onto his face and shrugged. "I forgot. What can I say? You're just so distracting and?—"

Jasmine sat up in the bath, water and bubbles rushing down her body. "Liam Bray Michaelson, did you butter me up with eight orgasms just so I would be more inclined to talk?"

They'd both tapped out at eight; Jasmine spent, and him so desperate to come inside her, he just couldn't wait any longer. They were having so much fun making up for all the years Jasmine couldn't come. He was shooting for ten next time .

"On a scale of one to ten, how pissed would you be if I had done that?"

Jasmine considered him suspiciously. "I would be reluctantly impressed, to be honest."

"In that case, yes, I did do that."

She breathed out, her nostrils flaring. "You're lucky you're cute."

"You weren't calling me cute when you were begging for mercy a half hour ago," he murmured in her ear as she lay back down, letting him run his hands over her soapy body.

"What can I say? You're just so distracting," she teased and Liam chuckled, squeezing her in his arms. If he had his way, they'd lie like this forever and he'd never have to let her go, not even for a single second. This was exactly where they belonged: wrapped around each other.

Bray padded into the bathroom, dropped a sparkly pink dragon toy on the bathmat, and barked at them. He'd woken up as Liam was running the bath and he'd wandered in and out, bringing them every toy he owned. Which was, Liam could admit, a lot of toys, considering they'd only brought him home yesterday. They'd gone a little overboard at the pet store, and both Liam and Jazz had started online shopping the second Liam had been given the green light from the shelter.

"Good job, buddy," he told Bray, who stuck out his tongue, wagged his tail, and ran off, butt wiggling, presumably to fetch another toy. "Is this normal behavior for a puppy? "

"Fetching? I think so, but I've never had a dog. Maggie's family had dogs when she was growing up, so she might know," Jasmine offered, and Liam ran a wet hand through his hair.

"I should've done more research. I feel like I have no clue what I'm doing here."

"If you can handle me, you can handle anything," Jasmine said, squeezing his hand. "And I will begrudgingly admit you're pretty good at handling me."

"Handling you is my favorite thing to do." He ran his hands all over her body and Jasmine sighed a happy sigh, relaxing into him. "And speaking of you…"

"Ugh."

"Talk to me, darling. What happened?"

Jasmine was quiet, skimming her fingertips over the top of the water. Finally, she huffed, and said, "Nadia was just talking about her life and she's achieved so much. It's incredible how much she's done, but I don't know. It just made me spiral. Do you ever just feel like you're completely wasting your life?"

"Not recently, but in general? Sure."

"Seriously?" Jasmine sounded skeptical.

"I lost the woman I thought I wanted to marry, all my friends, and got fired from my dream job. Not to mention, my parents are super impressive people with amazing careers, and I went to art school," he said with a wry laugh. "Don't get me wrong, I'm really content these days, but I'm still not exactly where I thought I'd be at thirty-seven. "

"I'm not where I thought I'd be either," she replied, her voice tinged with sadness.

"Where did you think you'd be?"

"I have no idea. I've never been able to picture my future—what's the point of picturing anything when I never actually fucking follow through?" She laughed bitterly. "But I guess I thought I'd figure it out someday. Yet here I am. It's like time moved on for everyone else and I'm still seventeen, sitting in the guidance counselor's office with no answer when they asked me where I wanted to be in ten years."

Her voice cracked, the sound unbearable to Liam. He swallowed. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you really not know what you want, or are you just scared to want it because you don't think you can get it?"

Her spine tensed, her breath shaking as she drew air into her lungs. "I don't know. I'm not sure I've ever actually managed to do anything I really wanted to. My parents forced me to get my degree. I didn't actually care about it. And even then, I only managed it because Maggie helped me. Your dad practically handed my job to me. I didn't earn it, and then Maggie and the rest of the team had to help me figure it out. Anything I've tried to do by myself, I've given up on. You've seen all the craft shit at my place. I've never finished any of those projects—not even a tiny fucking bracelet. I couldn't even make myself come. I needed you for that. "

Did she really think achievements only counted if she did them alone? Liam wouldn't have been surprised if that was one of her parents' dinner stipulations. It was bullshit.

"I didn't tell you why I loved Snoopy so much, did I?"

"No, just that you were obsessed."

"One of my mom's friends got me this Snoopy children's book collection for my fifth birthday. There were twelve books, all for a first grade reading level. I couldn't read them, but I memorized them because my parents read them to me every night. And they're the only books I read by myself for the next four years, because I couldn't read properly."

Jasmine pulled away from him so she could turn around to face him fully, eyes wide. "Really?"

"Mhmm. I was fine with everything else in school, but not reading. I knew there was a problem because all of my friends were flying through books, but I didn't tell anyone because I was embarrassed. I was also really resourceful, and I have a great memory, so I mostly just memorized shit and I managed to keep it under wraps until third grade, when it became really clear that I could barely read."

It was why he'd fallen in love with art as a kid. Art didn't need words; Liam could feel the emotions and craft a story in his head without having to read.

"I had an amazing teacher, and she spoke to my parents. There was a bunch of testing and they figured out pretty quickly that I'm dyslexic. I got lucky. My parents paid for intensive tutoring with a specialist and he gave me tons of techniques and resources to help me catch up with my classmates. I was pretty much on par with everyone else at school by sixth grade. I love reading now, but I still use most of the techniques I learned when I was ten—that's why I read mostly on my Kindle, so I can change the font."

"Holy shit. I would never have guessed," Jasmine said. "That's so impressive, Liam. You're amazing."

"It is impressive," he agreed. "It's the thing about myself I'm most proud of, actually. But I had help. I couldn't have done that on my own. And that doesn't make it any less of an achievement, does it?"

She frowned, as if she couldn't fathom why it would. "Of course not. It's an amazing achiev—oh. I see where you're going with this. It's not the same."

"Why?"

"Because… Well, I actually don't have an answer for that right now, but one will come to me," she muttered and Liam couldn't help but laugh at her indignant expression.

"Jasmine, darling, the things we do mean more when we do them with the people who care about us. When you're a hundred years old, being an absolute menace in a nursing home, do you think you're going to give a shit about what you achieved alone? No. You're going to cling to the memories of the people who loved you so much they wanted to help you. Unlike your parents, we're not all just sitting around waiting for you to fail. "

"I know that you believe that. And I believe that you believe that. I just don't know how to make myself believe it," she replied, throwing her hands up in frustration. "It's easier not to fail if I just don't try. That's what makes sense in my brain. How am I supposed to change three decades of thinking?"

"Ruff-ruff."

They both turned to look at Bray, who was trying to reach his little paws up to the tub, as if trying to join the conversation.

"Thank you. That's a very helpful suggestion, baby boy." Jasmine laughed softly, the frustration melting from her voice. She turned back to Liam, and her eyes were dull. "I don't regret any of this, but I also wasn't expecting to be questioning my own brain so much. It was just supposed to be sex. I'm exhausted, Liam. I'm so fucking tired."

"Come here." He held out his arms, and she slid into them. "I know it's exhausting right now, but it's not forever. One day, you're going to wake up and everything's going to feel a little easier. And the next day, and the next day. And you're not doing this on your own."

"Rule number three," she droned.

"Fuck the rules. You, Jasmine Cannon, are my favorite person in the entire world. As far as I'm concerned, you're never going to have to do anything on your own again. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere, if that's okay with you."

"It is," she said after a moment of silence, and Liam knew that it would take more than one conversation for her to believe him. He knew it would take time after time of him reassuring her, and it would take work, on Jasmine's part, to relearn how to exist in a world that she'd spent so long hiding her true self from. But when she was ready, he would be there. Forever, if she let him.