Chapter 3

Andrew

“ W here’s your shadow?”

I stared at Nathan and Chase, greeting me at the door. They were so happy together; I was glad they’d worked things out between them and found a way to be together. I shoved Nathan’s shoulder at his question and pushed my way into their apartment. The place was small, as were most Seattle apartments, unless you earned a lot. But I think the two of them preferred to be closer to each other, anyway.

“He said he would meet me here.” Not that Brandon was my shadow. That was just how most people saw us. We’d been joined at the hips since we were boys. Our moms had met in a pregnancy class and paired us off as friends from the second we were born. Being in someone’s life for so long, it was difficult not to be close. Maybe we were closer than friends, but not quite boyfriends.

Our friend Joe was already here. With a beer in hand, he sat on the small gray couch, picking at the label. His gaze was fixed on Aiden, Nathan’s brother, across the room. One of these days, the tension between those two was going to snap. Not that Nathan would allow it. Joe was a great guy, but he didn’t ‘do’ commitment. Nathan confided that while he didn’t know his brother’s sexuality, he didn’t want to see him become one of Joe’s many conquests.

“There’s beer in the fridge. Feel free to help yourself,” Chase said as I moved deeper into the apartment. I passed Aiden sitting on a stool at the kitchen island. Despite having a bottle in his hand, it didn’t seem like he was drinking from it. He was only eighteen, but it hadn’t stopped him from joining us for some fun in the last couple of months. He was starting classes at The University of Washington—where we’d all graduated this past year.

I grabbed my drink and joined him, sitting on one of the stools. He gave me a small smile before his gaze flipped back to Joe, sitting on the couch. I leaned in close to Aiden, making him jump when I said, “You can always go over there and talk to him.”

Aiden chuckled and relaxed in his seat. “I can. And we talk plenty, but it feels weird when my brother watches us so closely.”

My eyebrows rose at his confession. “Is something going on there?”

He shook his head, finally lifting the bottle and taking a small sip. “No. We’re only friends, but...” His face flushed as he glanced around, ensuring no one eavesdropped. “Please don’t say anything to Nathan.”

“It’s not my job to say anything, but don’t be surprised if your brother has valuable advice. ”

Aiden rubbed his neck before taking another sip of his beer. “He might, but he might also tell me to stay away from his friends.”

Someone knocked at the door again, and Chase went to answer it. I shifted my attention in that direction, hoping to see Brandon had made it, but disappointment settled when it was only Daniel. I was worried about Brandon. He’d had the worst luck with dating, and it only seemed to get worse after that one night three years ago—a night he seemed hell-bent on pretending never happened.

Realizing I left Aiden hanging, I turned my attention back to him. “He could tell you that. In the end, you have to do what makes you happy.” I shrugged before I patted him on the shoulder.

Aiden seemed content with that answer. In some weird way, we’d all become older brothers to him.

Ten minutes later, Brandon finally made his appearance. Shawn was at the door with him and instantly that familiar green flare of jealousy swept through me. It was stupid because they could’ve just shown up at the same time, but I didn’t like seeing them together. I never enjoyed seeing Brandon with anyone. It was torture when I wanted him all to myself. I’d had the chance to have him all to myself, dangling in front of my face, and then ripped away just as quickly three years ago. Life could be cruel.

People packed the tiny apartment as the party went into full swing. Chase and Nathan didn’t fully think it through when inviting us, but we, their friends, were used to this kind of thing. After grabbing a drink, Brandon instantly gravitated toward me and planted himself on my lap. That was why the men in his life got so annoyed with him, but I could stop it as much as I could stop a derailing train. He was pure comfort and home sitting on me. This was where he belonged.

My arms wrapped around his waist, and I pressed my nose close to him, savoring his scent. His mom was into all-natural stuff, and it had carried over to him, so it wasn’t unusual for him to smell like essential oils. This evening, he had the noticeable aroma of sage and lemon. What he smelled like spoke volumes about his moods. It was evident that my best friend was stressed. Yeah, it was weird that two best friends behaved this way, but it was as close to Brandon as I could get without ruining our friendship.

Everyone sat around talking and drinking until the pizza we’d all chipped in for arrived. It was like being back in college all over again and brought back memories of long nights of studying. It was good to unwind and spend the night connecting with friends and our extended family, because that’s what we’d become over the past several years. Life hadn’t been easy since graduation, consumed by finding jobs and adapting to adulthood. It was a bunch of bullshit if I had anything to say about it. Being an adult was the absolute worst.

As the evening wore on, everyone shifted around the room. The couch was now occupied by Aiden and Joe, who sat really close, while Nathan watched his brother like a hawk. I secretly hoped that if something happened between the two of them, Nathan wouldn’t try to stop it.

Daniel and Shawn were in the kitchen, arguing about the proper way to make some sort of cocktail. It was a gathering at a friend’s apartment, not the bar. No one needed anything fancy, so it wasn’t like they needed to fight over it. The two of them were either going to kill each other one day or fuck it out. My money was on them banging each other.

Brandon and I had found a spot on the floor by the back of the couch. My arm was slung over his shoulders and we’d been people watching for most of the night.

“I’m kind of tired.” Brandon snuggled into my side.

I kissed the top of his head, and he looked up at me with a sleepy smile. “You can rest on me if you want,” I said.

“I know, but it’s kind of loud in here.”

It was, and the arguing in the kitchen was getting worse. Chase had to get up from his place on Nathan’s lap to separate Daniel and Shawn before fists got involved.

“Do you want to head home?” I asked as things calmed down.

Brandon shrugged, nestling into my side a little more. There was a rightness to him on me, like he’d always belonged there. That familiar pang settled into my chest, wishing that this was more, that he’d give us a chance. “I have to open the store with my parents tomorrow, so it’s probably a good idea not to stay too late.”

Brandon’s mom and dad owned a bookstore, and it was what helped him stay afloat a little better than the rest of us after graduation. He’d gone to school for business so that he could take over when his parents retired. He loved to get lost in a good book, so it wasn’t a hardship for him to take over.

“I can take you home.”

The sleepy smile that Brandon turned my way again made my heart flutter. “You don’t need to. Stay. Enjoy the party.”

“It’s not as fun without you.” It was sappy but true.

“Would you two fuck and get it over with already?” Joe was leaning over the back of the couch, staring at us.

I flipped him off, which made Brandon laugh. “You know it’s not like that.”

Joe’s dark eyebrows rose into his hairline as his tongue played with his lip ring. “Do I? You two are looking pretty cozy down there.”

Brandon sat up and shook his head. We were used to the teasing from our friends at this point. Joe had always been a little more aggressive about it than the others. What would he think if he knew we’d kissed once before?

Joe’s piercing blue eyes followed us as we stood from the floor. It was like he was hoping to catch something more that wasn’t there... even if it was. We both said goodnight and thank you to Nathan and Chase before we walked outside into the chilly Seattle air. With only a light jacket, Brandon tightened it around himself while we headed to the bus stop.

“You really don’t need to help me get home.”

I looked at my phone. It was eleven thirty at night. This was a nicer part of Seattle, but it still didn’t feel right to let him go by himself. “I want to.”

Brandon shook his head. “And how will you get home?”

I shrugged before wrapping him in a hug to keep him warm. “Eh, I could always just crash at your place.”

Maybe it was the lack of light, but I swore my best friend just blushed.