16. Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Sixteen

P ixie stared at her mother, not quite processing the two worlds colliding.

One moment, she was sitting on Nolan's lap, enjoying the way Eva's eyes glided over her. The next, her mother's voice pierced through the coziness with razor-sharp precision.

Maisie's eyes crinkled with a smile as she glanced among the group. "Are these your friends?"

Her insides rioted at the idea of introducing her mother to her family at Whipped. At having to explain her past and why she'd avoided talking about it for so long.

"Yeah, they are." She hopped off Nolan's lap, ignoring the intent looks burning into her. Her adrenaline pumped hard, like she needed to bolt out of here. "Who are you here with?" She guided Maisie away from her friends, not wanting them to intermix. Guilt crashed in next, especially when she saw the slight downturn of her mother's eyes. The woman wasn't ignorant, and she felt like shit for needing her worlds separate, but the space at Whipped was hers, something she'd carved out for herself.

"My coworkers," Maisie said, pointing to a group of older women lounging on one of the other spots. "We decided to drive into the city tonight for an outing. We started at a painting studio and wanted to get some snacks afterward."

Pixie's mouth dried as her brain tried to come up with a solution of how to get out of this situation while keeping her divide intact. "That sounds fun. What sort of painting?" Her mouth moved on autopilot, latching onto the thing she knew best—art, not sorting through these intense emotions.

Maisie opened her arms. "Can I have a hug, or is that too embarrassing?"

Pixie exhaled with relief at the out her mother offered. She'd rather pretend this was a teenage phase than the complicated truth. "Of course." She leaned into her mother's hug, squeezing a little tighter because her guilt dripped through her in a steady stream.

When they separated, Maisie patted her on the shoulder. "I'll let you get back to your friends. Come visit me soon?"

Pixie chewed on her lower lip. As much as she wanted, she couldn't return to the ease she'd felt previously, not after that stir-up. Not with her mother sitting on the opposite side of the rooftop bar while Pixie struggled to keep the different parts of her life from colliding.

"Of course," she said, realizing she froze there. "I'll come over again for tea."

Maisie offered a small smile, an undeniable sadness in her eyes. They both danced around the distance between each other, understanding while they couldn't change the past, they could appreciate what they had now. "Have fun tonight, sweetheart."

"You too," she said and walked back to her friends. Everyone had returned to their conversations, but she caught a few quick glances in her direction. The one person whose gaze hadn't abated was Eva. The woman stared at her with the same intensity as always, and a shiver rolled down Pixie's spine. She couldn't seem to hide from her, even when she wanted to.

Pixie stopped a few steps away. Did she want to return to Nolan's lap, be the center of attention? The cozy, secure moment had been shattered, and she had no way of reclaiming it while her mother was still here.

Honestly, she just wanted to leave.

Eva beckoned her over with the crook of her finger, and Pixie almost gasped out loud in relief from that subtle command. She'd been paralyzed by the situation, but like always, Eva had paid close attention to her. Pixie approached, her shoulders tight as she braced herself for the barrage of questions sure to come her way.

"Want a sip?" Eva lifted her glass of dark beer in Pixie's direction.

"Yes," Pixie said, reaching out to accept. The first burst of the porter on her tongue gave a hint of relief. Sloan perched on Eva's lap like a princess, daintily sipping away at his pink-colored drink.

"I could get you one of your own," Eva offered, her dark eyes seeking.

"Don't know how long I'll be staying for," she said, aware of where her mother sat on the other side of the bar. The way she'd acted made her feel like a piece-of-shit daughter. If she were normal, she could've introduced Maisie to her friends and enjoyed the rest of her night. Other people had fucked-up childhoods and managed to salvage their relationships with their parents, so what was wrong with her?

"Really, Pix?" Sloan said. "You just got here."

Guilt flooded her. She had wanted to be here tonight for Nolan's birthday. After feeling separate from everyone so much, she was desperate to join in with what would be a great night with everyone. Instead, she couldn't relax—not with her mother sharing the same space.

How long she could last was questionable. She already sweated bullets.

"Did the lunch from earlier not settle right with you?" Eva asked, her dark gaze knowing, even as she fabricated an excuse.

Pixie offered a strained smile. "Yeah, my stomach's in total distress."

"Mine hasn't been feeling great either," Eva said, tapping Sloan on the side. "If you want company walking back to the apartment, I should probably join you." Sloan took the cue and rose from his comfortable perch on her lap, and she stood.

Pixie threw her hands out in defense. "No, no, you stay here. Have fun with everyone. I'll head home and curl up in bed." The lie slipped out so smoothly she almost believed it. Her stomach tied in knots, but not from food poisoning.

"You guys aren't feeling good? What the fuck did you eat in the fridge?" Micah asked, and Pixie internally groaned.

"The kale was a little extra moist, so I'm guessing that was the culprit," Eva said, smooth as ever. "I'll throw it out when we get back." She'd picked up her pint and took a sip, then placed it on the table next to Sloan. "Feel free to finish my drink."

Micah wrinkled his nose. "Thank fuck I don't eat that shit."

"If they're under the weather tonight, you're always welcome to come over," Parker said, slinging an arm around Micah. Seeing the big, burly man truly happy was a welcome adjustment after the years when sadness had followed him around like a ghost .

Micah pointed at Pixie. "If you two are going to be up vomiting the whole night, I'm going to take Parker's offer."

"You should," Pixie said, her smile believably weak. It wasn't hard when her insides were a riot and she held herself together by a thread. Some days, she'd come so far from her upbringing, and she'd cobbled this whole life for herself. Other times, she was a stone's throw away from the dizzying, off-kilter place.

Pixie leaned down and pressed a kiss to Nolan's temple. "I'll make it up to you soon, okay, Noles?"

He arched a brow. "I've got a new flogger to test if you're volunteering."

Pixie shook her head. He was shameless. She enjoyed impact play, even if it wasn't her favorite, but she loved bringing her friends happiness even more. "Always, always. Let me know when."

She'd never minded being the sub who played with a variety of partners. It was all she'd ever known, but recently, a yearning burned deep inside her to have one Dom to submit to. One person to come home to, even if they still scened with others on occasion.

"You'll come in next week for the upcoming newbie class, right?" Meg called over to her. Meg's gaze was piercing, as it had been lately, so she wasn't hiding as well as she'd thought.

"Absolutely. Want me to help run the class?"

"Yep," Meg said. "If it's just me, I'll scare all the newbies away."

"You're not wrong," Tristan said.

"Good, cut the wheat from the chaff," Fin said.

Eva placed a hand on Pixie's shoulder. "Are you ready to head out?"

"You don't have to," Pixie whispered.

"I do." The flickering warmth in her gaze slammed right into Pixie's chest. The way this woman stepped in without question, how she anticipated her needs like no one else had before, fuck, Pixie was reeling.

Pixie numbly waded through a bunch of hugs as she said her good-byes. When she glanced up, her mother stared at her from the opposite side of the bar, and she knew she'd made the right decision. Those sad eyes bored right through her, filling her with self-loathing. She wobbled on her feet.

"This way." Eva led her toward the door. The command snapped Pixie from the freeze-up she'd fallen into. Fuck, she needed to get back to seeing a therapist. She'd taken a break, but obviously, that hadn't been her brightest idea.

They stepped into the elevator, which descended at a rapid pace. Neither said a word, the quiet deafening.

"I, uh…" Pixie started, but the words halted on her tongue. Her mind swirled, and her palms were sweaty.

"Hey." Eva slid two fingers under her chin and tilted her face up. "You don't owe me an explanation. I could see the panic in your eyes, and I wanted to offer an out. While the distraction was nice, I've also had an intense couple of days."

Pixie could see how easily Eva lied because the woman had been enjoying herself. Yet she'd dropped everything the second she saw Pixie in distress. Her stomach clenched tight.

The fact that Eva wasn't pushing somehow made those words bubble to the surface.

"My mom. Though there's a lot more to unpack there."

Eva nodded. "Want to make one more stop with me before we head to the apartment?"

Pixie furrowed her brows. Truthfully, she felt a little restless. She'd planned on spending the night out with the crew at Whipped, not escaping like her heels were on fire because she teetered toward a breakdown. "Yeah, I'd like that."

"Consider it a repayment for pulling my ass out of a bad headspace at the club." Eva's voice was sultry and her stance confident, and everything about her made Pixie's heart stumble. Tonight, she'd dressed to her usual perfection—auburn hair pulled back into a neat bun, her crimson lips neat, and the black skirt she wore with the blouse highlighted her curves in the best way.

"Going to tell me where we're heading?" Pixie asked.

"Now, where would the fun be in that?" Eva winked as she offered her hand.

Pixie threaded her fingers through Eva's.

No matter how dangerous this attraction was, she couldn't help herself.

She'd follow this woman anywhere.