Chapter 24

Later that week, the article hit the paper, and everyone was talking about what happened to Jameson. I hoped he wasn't angry that I'd gone to a reporter and the administration. I was trying to help, not make things worse. Now I wasn't so sure. Maybe he didn't want everyone to know what happened.

I kept checking my phone, but there were no messages from him. I hadn't talked to him since that night he'd pushed me away.

Owen was upset too. He liked the new coach but missed Jameson. I tried to explain that Jameson was just processing what happened, and I was sure he'd talk to us when he was ready.

That's why Jameson pushed me away when I wanted to help. He was so used to internalizing everything, protecting himself from what everyone else thought about him. I just hoped he'd see things another way.

At the end of the day, I left the school with a heavy heart. It was Owen's night to work at the farm, and I wasn't sure I could go there. It hurt too much to think about what might have been with Jameson.

I was surprised to see Teddy leaning against the driver's side door of my car in the school's parking lot.

I shielded the sun with my hand. "What are you doing here?"

He straightened. "I wanted to make sure you were bringing Owen by tonight."

"That was the plan."

Teddy's expression was serious, and I couldn't get a read on him. "Jameson wants Owen to come. He wants you to come too."

I frowned. "He does?"

Teddy nodded. "He has something he wants to show you."

My forehead wrinkled. "What could he possibly have to show me?"

"You'll see," Teddy said before he headed toward his car that was a few spots away in the lot.

"Wait." I jogged after him. "Will you please tell me what's going on?"

Teddy turned to face me. "I don't want to give anything away. It's not my place. He just asked that I get you to the farm, and this is my way of doing that."

"O-kay."

Teddy's brow furrowed. "Will you be there?"

I nodded, trying not to let hope overtake every other emotion coursing through me: wonder, fear, and curiosity.

"You were good for Jameson, and I have a feeling he was good for you and Owen," Teddy said, surprising me with his ability to see the situation clearly.

"He was."

"If you felt anything for him, please come tonight."

"Felt anything for him? I love him." I couldn't believe I was declaring it to Jameson's eldest brother, but it was the truth, and I was dying to tell someone.

Teddy nodded. "Good. That's good."

I gestured with my arms. "How is that good? Jameson pushed me away."

"Because you'll at least hear what he has to say. He's not perfect. None of us are. It's how we react in times of crisis that matters."

I wanted to point out that Jameson shut down and pushed the ones who cared about him the most away. But he could have reacted on instinct, on years-old patterns and behaviors. I could at least listen to him now. "I'll be there."

"Thank you."

I turned to head back to the car.

"Oh, and Claire?" Teddy called after me. "For what it's worth, we're rooting for you two. We like Owen."

"He adores you too."

Owen came home after work, talking about Wes and Teddy like they were heroes. In a way, they were. They worked in law enforcement; they worked a dangerous job in order to keep the community safe. But to Owen, they took the time to show him things, and it made him feel important.

Teddy nodded, then got into his truck.

* * *

After a quick dinner, I drove Owen to the farm, my nerves ratcheting up with each mile traveled.

"Will Jameson be there tonight?" Owen asked from the back seat.

"I don't know what his schedule is this week, but I think so."

"Are you two still not talking?" Owen asked.

"Jameson was upset about what happened. He needed some space to himself."

"Like Dad needs his space?"

"The divorce was my idea." I think Eric would have kept things the way they were. He was happy to have someone cook his meals, clean his house, and raise his child so he could focus on work.

"But you weren't happy."

"I was lonely, and I wanted something better for us." Maybe that was selfish.

"I like the Calloways though. I don't want to lose them."

"You won't. I won't let that happen. You can work here as long as they'll have you." I wasn't sure what was going to happen tonight. I didn't want to make promises I couldn't keep. But no one had said anything about Owen not working there anymore. In fact, Teddy had stopped by to ensure that we would be here tonight.

I pulled into the lane, waving at the kid working the gate. He recognized our car and knew Owen was here to work. Then I parked at the main house.

"Why are you getting out?" Owen asked.

"Teddy said that Jameson wanted to show me something." I held my hands up. "Don't get your hopes up, because I don't know what it is or what it means."

"Yeah, okay."

I felt bad that Owen had been let down so many times in his life. I wanted to give him stability. I thought the Calloways would be a good connection for him. A strong family. But now I wasn't so sure. Had I screwed up by getting involved when it couldn't last?

"I'm going to the barn and see where they want me."

"Okay. Be good."

"I will be. Mom?"

"Yes." Somehow, Owen looked so much more mature tonight. He was on the cusp of puberty, growing into the man he would become. "You deserve to be happy."

Tears pricked my eyes. I wouldn't do anything to hurt him.

"You can't keep living for me. You have to live for yourself."

With that parting shot, he walked away, and I wondered when he'd gotten so smart.

The door to the house opened, and Jameson jogged down the steps. "Claire."

I turned to face him. "Jameson."

It felt awkward between us. I wasn't sure why he wanted me, or what his purpose in bringing me here was. "Thank you for coming. I wanted to show you something."

"That's what Teddy said."

"Have you ever ridden a horse?" he asked me as he walked toward the stables.

I knew they had a couple of horses that roamed the fenced pasture, but I never saw anyone ride them. "No."

"Today will be your first ride then."

I fell into step next to him. "What's this about?"

"I'll tell you. Just give me a few minutes, okay?"

I nodded, swallowing over the lump in my throat. Was this where he told me we didn't have a future? That we wanted different things. That I'd overstepped my bounds. "I'm sorry about the article in the paper. I thought it would help. But I didn't think about the repercussions. That everyone would know what happened, and it might make things worse for you. Did it?"

Jameson stopped in front of a horse that was tethered to the fence. "I wanted to thank you for doing that. No one has ever done anything like that for me before."

"The kids talked to Mr. Elias and Mr. Miller. You should have heard them. They adore you."

Pain crossed Jameson's face. "I miss them."

He helped me step into the stirrup, throw my leg over the back of the horse, and settle on the saddle. He grabbed the reigns and easily pulled himself behind me. He tucked a hand around my waist, pulling me against him. "You didn't do anything wrong."

Then he flicked the reigns, and the horse started off at a slow trot.

"Where are we going?" I asked him.

"You'll see."

My body was flush from his proximity. I wanted to know what it meant, but I didn't want to rush him. I relaxed into his body, content to be held by him.

"You feel good in my arms," Jameson said once we'd passed the fields where customers were hiking and the commotion of the farm itself.

My heart ached. Would this be the last time I'd be with him?

We traveled for a while before finally coming to a clearing. "This is it."

He dismounted, then helped me to my feet. "It's beautiful. But I don't understand."

"This is where I want to build a house."

"You decided to build. Oh, Jameson, that's wonderful." I'd suspected that he held himself back from moving forward in certain areas of his life because he was under the mistaken belief that he wasn't settled yet. That he didn't know what he wanted. When he just needed to trust himself. I was so proud of him, but did he see me and Owen in his future?

Jameson drew in a breath. "The only thing is, it isn't complete without you and Owen."

My eyes filled with tears.

"I screwed up. I pushed you away when I should have leaned on you. Everything fell apart, and I panicked."

"It was a shocking development. I don't think either of us could have anticipated that a parent would go to such lengths to ensure his child got to play football."

Jameson shook his head. "It wasn't okay. I acted like someone who didn't know what he wanted or who he was. I thought I was that guy who couldn't make a decision. But I'm not. I like being a firefighter."

I wanted to go to him, but I understood that he had to do this on his own.

"I also like to teach and coach."

My heart ached for the pain I heard in his voice. "I'm so sorry that you lost your positions because of our relationship."

"It felt right to be with you. What Brian did was wrong, and there was no way we could have anticipated that someone would have violated a private moment and exploited it." Jameson seemed to gain momentum with each word spoken. "I could never regret what happened between us. I love you."

Relief poured through me. "I love you too."

"And I can't promise I won't screw up again, but I vow to notice when I'm being triggered and be more aware of my reaction. I want to be a better man for you."

I moved to him then, placing a palm against his cheek. "You already are a good man."

"You make me better." Jameson rested his forehead on mine. "What do you say? Will you give me another chance?"

"I want to."

"I want you and Owen in my life. I'm not saying we have to live together now. But I'm looking at the future, and I only see one with you in it."

My chest filled with happiness. "I think Owen would love to live here on the farm, and I would too." I adored his family, and I could see that Jameson lived for his. He wouldn't be happy living anywhere else. It wasn't a maturity thing. The farm and his family were in his blood.

He pulled me to him and kissed me. "I'm so sorry."

"You don't have to keep apologizing."

"I hurt you and Owen."

"I think Owen understood you were upset, but he missed you."

"I talked to him about us."

I raised a brow. "You did?"

"I wanted to make sure he was okay with us being together. He's had a lot of changes in his life the last year or two, and I didn't want to add to that."

"What did he say?"

"He wants you to be happy, and he likes having me in his life too."

"That's good." It was what I expected, but hearing that Owen had confided in Jameson made me feel good about the future of our relationship.

I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I want to be the man in your life."

"I want that too."

"I'm not always going to do the predictable thing. But I promise to always consider you and Owen when I do. We can talk it out and make decisions together."

I ran a hand through the strands of his hair. "I love how you're unpredictable."

"I never want to be apart from you again. From now on, no matter what happens, we go through it together."

I leaned into him. "Are you going to kiss me now?"

"I thought you'd never ask." He lowered his lips to mine, and I poured everything I was feeling the last few days into it.

"I'll never stop loving you."

"I wouldn't want it any other way." Our path wasn't easy, and we didn't have a conventional relationship. But that was Jameson, and I wouldn't want to be with anyone else.