Chapter 9

9

EMBER

“ W hat the hell was that stunt you pulled last night?!”

Ember had been called into Deputy Chief Sophia Ramirez’s office the moment she resumed back at work. Sophia Ramirez was around Josephine’s age but with a fiery Latina temper. Unlike with her own mother, Sophia did not hesitate to chew her out.

“I was doing my jo?—”

“Oh, spare me that. You’re not a rookie, Thompson.” Sophia jabbed a finger at her to emphasize her point. “If you’re still making rookie mistakes at this stage, then maybe firefighting isn’t the best profession for you. The job is already dangerous enough as it is.”

Ember felt a jolt of panic rising within her, along with the need to defend herself. “I thought there was somebody in the building, Ma’am.”

“And you should have waited, assessed the situation before charging in like some raging bull. That is not what firefighters do!”

Her tirade went on for a good deal longer before she was dismissed. She’d seen the deputy chief get pissed a number of times, but Ember didn’t recall ever seeing her that angry before.

Even the looks she got from the other firefighters were odd. Most were cautious, even when she sat to eat with them. Nobody broached the subject, something she was thankful for, but that only drove home the fact that everyone was consciously avoiding the topic. Eventually, her mom came down hard with an order to see a psychologist for counseling and not return to work until she was deemed fit to serve again.

That was it. She was back home again. Ember had no one to blame this time. It was her own reckless behavior that got her to that point.

Failure. Failure. Failure.

The voice chanted in her mind each time she was alone with her thoughts.

“Your symptoms indicate that you might be suffering from depression, Ember,” the psychologist said.

Ember had been entirely focused on his large-rimmed glasses and the way he pushed them up his nose each time she said something he found to be interesting. Her mind ground to a halt when she processed what he’d said.

“Me? Depressed? I don’t see how I could possibly be… I mean, I’m not locking myself away at home, hiding away from the world.”

He studied her for a moment then nodded his head as though her words had confirmed something he already knew.

“Depression manifests in different ways in different people. Your attempts to end your own life are alarming, to say the least, considering your choice of profession. It is good you were ordered to take this test. You are a danger to yourself and the people who work with you, Ember.”

“I save lives! I wasn’t trying to end my life!” she snapped at him. The sudden wrath had surprised her. Ember prided herself in being coolheaded but something about his words rubbed her wrong.

The psychologist showed no outward reaction. He did not chastise her for her outburst or overly dwell on it when she showed no desire to discuss the matter.

He’s right, isn’t he? Ember thought. Jenna had been forced to enter the burning building to come rescue her. Leilani had done the same that day they rescued the cat. Ultimately, her actions ended up endangering others.

Guess I failed firefighting too

“I can see you spiraling,” the doctor observed.

Ember shrugged, “What would you have me do?”

“For starters?” Some real emotion crept into his voice for the first time since she’d begun the appointment. “Stop putting yourself at risk, that remains the nexus of the problem we’re having, Ember.”

Ember didn’t have any response to that. It was easier said than done.

“Treat yourself like somebody you care about, like somebody you want to see succeed. Put yourself in the shoes of those who care about you enough to risk their lives to run into a burning building to save you.”

On the ride back home, she turned his words over in her head. If she was her mother, what would she want for herself? What would Haley and Rory want for her? If she was Ember’s good friend who wanted to see her succeed, what would she want her to do? What she truly wanted was Josephine to come back. But that wasn’t going to be possible. She’d said her goodbyes.

“Get to work on a new car,” she said out loud. It was meant to be something of a joke, but the idea didn’t leave her mind. She found herself being deposited by the Uber at Farcy’s property. He lived out of town. His next-door neighbor was at least a mile and a half away. Ember couldn’t tell if the man was solitary or just lonely out here.

He was waiting for her outside, dressed in jean overalls with a cigarette stuck between his lips. His ford F150 was sitting in the front of the house.

“Figured you’d show up one of these days. Come on, she’s out in the barn.”

Ember followed after him. They walked around his house. The property looked well-maintained, clearly the old man put some effort into keeping it clean, but she couldn’t help but muse about the feeling that the house didn’t feel like somebody lived in it. She wanted to ask about his family, his wife had passed away, but they had three children, all of whom had moved out at this point.

The American Buick was sitting in the garage, thankfully, still on its wheels. It didn’t look like the man had touched it since the day it caught fire.

“Was thinking you’d bring a mechanic with ya to check it out or something,” he said as she walked around the car.

“Nah, I’m good,” she replied.

Like he said, most of the engine was unsalvageable, the engine block was completely warped and misaligned from the fire. She would need to rebuild the engine bay, she didn’t trust it’s integrity, not after the fire.

“Yeah, you’ve always been a little gearhead,” he commented. “I remember the first day your mom brought you to the drag strip. Had eyes as wide as saucers staring at all the muscle cars around ya.”

He glanced at her. “It’s a shame to see some of that light dimmed since you lost your Joan.”

Again, Ember didn’t know what to say. She and the old man barely spoke even though they met on the drag strip often. It was odd to know the man had such memories of her. How many other people like Farcy were out there?

“How much do you want for it?” Ember thought the car was in relatively good condition. She’d start saving some money for it.

“How much you got?”

Ember did some quick mental calculation. She had some money saved up. But it was not going to be anywhere near enough to pay for the car.

“Only about four thousand. If you give me a little more time, I can?—”

“Take it. Car is worth eight thousand, but you can pay me the remaining half when you’re ready.”

“I—thank you,” Ember said gratefully. Eight thousand dollars was more than fair for the car. It was a classic car, with a lot of history.

“I can send you the money right now,” Ember offered.

The transaction was quick, she accessed her bank account on her phone and sent him the money. Farcy brought a trailer hitch from under a shed and they rolled the car over it. He then hooked it up to his Ford truck and they drove it down to the Ember’s place and rolled the car into her garage.

After all the hard work, Ember and Farcy stepped back to stare at the garage. Seeing a car sitting in there was nice again. All of her tools were still there, some parts left from Joan’s build.

“Well,” Farcy patted her shoulder. “Good luck with it.”

He left her alone. Ember stood there for a good five minutes. Her fingers itched, she wanted to pick up the phone and call Josephine. She wanted to tell her the good news. The need was so overpowering, she couldn’t breathe. Ember went and sat in the car for a while. Then she curled up on the seat. The tears flowed freely.

“How the hell did you get the car running in less than a week?!” Farcy asked, gaping at the Buick. She’d told him over the phone, she didn’t expect him to show up to actually see the car.

“Went by the junkyard to check on Joan. The car is gone but most of her engine was still in good condition since the collisions came from the side and the rear. Salvaged what I could.”

The car was nowhere near ready for the drag strip. The new engine was a temporary solution to keep it running well enough to drive it to the grocery store and back.

“Well, you would’ve made a damn fine mechanic if you weren’t a firefighter.”

Ember nodded. She’d learned quite a lot about cars while building Joan. Not that she’d worked on it alone, but the professionals didn’t hesitate to show her the ropes and answer any questions she had. She had learned a lot online. Through videos. Through books. It was a passion for her. All of that skill came in handy now that she was working on her second car.

She settled into something of a routine, largely shutting herself away from the world as she worked on her car and attended her appointments with the psychologist.

The day had started like the rest. Ember spent most of her day at home, she was in the garage, working on the car. She wasn’t doing anything particularly important. She was mostly zoned out until her phone ringing woke her from her reverie. She jolted and reached for her device. It was Captain Carter.

“Hey,” Ember answered, her voice was hoarse and scratchy from crying.

“Ember!” Jenna yelled. The urgency in her voice had Ember on alert immediately. “We need you!”

“What?!”

“Where the hell are you?!” Jenna screamed into the phone.

In the background, Ember could hear the unmistakable chaos of a fireground. People were screaming, some in panic, others were giving orders. She could almost smell the smoke.

She was out of her car in a blink. Ember stepped out of her garage and was confronted by what she would have described as a nightmarish sight. In the distance, it looked like the edge of the world was on fire. Thick clouds of smoke blanketed the sky, underneath it was the orange glow of fire, burning underneath it. Phoenix Ridge was on fire and she’d slept through half of it.

“This can’t be real,” Ember said out loud, into the phone.

“It’s real! Get your butt to the fire station and gear up, we need every hand on deck and you’re one of the best firefighters we got!”

Her hood slammed shut and she hopped into the Buick. Swift Hog wheezed a couple of times, churning out a plume of black smoke.

“Come on, Hog,” Ember encouraged.

She gave it a couple of pumps before the engine rattled to life. She threw it in gear and tore out of her driveway. The city was in panic. Understandably so, everyone could see the smoke plumes from the fire. Ember was yet to make out the extent of the forest fire, it looked like the whole outskirts of Phoenix Ridge was on fire. Most likely, the fire wouldn’t reach the city, but if the flames went into the suburbs, the destruction to lives and property would be unthinkable.

The fire station was a mess when she arrived, everybody had been called in to work. The parking lot was filled to the brim. Nobody batted an eye when Ember rushed into the locker room to grab her gear. She was dressed and on the next fire truck heading out.

Haley was in the back. Leilani was with her. Elle was behind the wheel. Ember could see her lips moving, she was likely praying. As she stared ahead into the danger they were riding into, she understood her urge to pray.

The radio crackled. Becky’s unmistakable voice came through the speakers.

“Engine four?”

“Chief?” Elle replied.

There was a pause before Ember’s mother spoke again.

“Ember?” she called.

“Here, Chief,” she answered. There was tension in the fire truck as they anticipated what her mother was going to say next.

“Glad to have you back,” her mother said. “Stay safe, all of you.”

Ember could almost hear Elle heave a sigh of relief as she turned the intersection. It was a red light, sirens were blaring, everyone stopped to let them pass. They could all see the smoke.

“Engine four, I want you on the front lines, you will join engine two in securing the suburbs and making sure the evacuations continue without a hitch.”

“Aye aye, Chief,” Ember replied.

Elle was already altering their course.

“It’s nice having you back,” Haley said, rubbing Ember’s shoulder. The genuineness in her voice made Ember tear up slightly. She’d missed this, the camaraderie, the sisterhood, and the feeling of actually doing something for the greater good and saving lives.

“Thank you,” she looked at each of them. “I’m grateful to all of you for looking out for me.”

Elle smiled though her eyes remained glued to road.

“We’re happy to look out for you, Ember. Wish you would help us out by looking out for you too.”

She nodded. This was what Leilani meant when she said Ember would understand. She did. Ember pictured one of her colleagues charging into a building like she had been doing.

“I’m sorry I’ve been so blind.”

Leilani scooted close to her and took her hand. There was a knowing look in her eyes.

“You’re not alone, Ember. Remember that we agreed to take these risks with you.”

Ember squeezed Leilani’s hand back. The accusing voice in her head was quiet this time around. No glaring eyes in the shadows either. She was at peace, despite the chaos.

While Ember’s mother was directing the battle against the flames, she was going to do her part in the fight. The fire had already taken a few homes before they arrived on the scene. The forest was aflame behind them as the roads were packed with fleeing residents. They had to pick their way through the throng of cars littering the roads.

Engine two was already on scene. Kiera, Zara, and Captain Jenna were doing their best to keep the fire from spreading further. The captain took charge the moment they arrived.

“Position the truck down at the end of Road Thirty-Four. Ember, you and Haley work your way up from there, make sure all the houses are evacuated while we try to keep these homes from burning to the ground.”

They barely had any time to respond before Elle barreled her way down to their position. Ember hopped out of the truck, the heat and smoke hit her immediately. It was familiar territory. Her mind was at ease as she took in everything.

She glanced west, the fire didn’t show any indication of spreading that way for now, but the wind could change that at any moment. Farcy’s home was in that direction. He should have gotten out by now. Ember prayed for his safety as she went blitzing through the houses, checking to make sure there was nobody still in them. The homes were so tightly packed together, she was forced to be more thorough to make sure she didn’t miss anything. If the fire got to this area, it would be devastating.

She joined Jenna at the junction.

“Houses are clear.”

“Good,” Jenna acknowledged. She seemed to study the fire burning in the distance for a moment. Ember could see her mental gears turning and knew the conclusion she was going to reach.

“Backfiring?” Ember said, knowing that that was what the captain was thinking.

“Yeah, we need to burn away all the vegetation in the area so the fire doesn’t have any fuel. At least, not in this direction. Grab a cannister from the truck, we’ll have engine two filled up and ready to escort you. You’re going in with Zara, Kiera, and Haley.”

Ember was moving as fast as she could. Backfiring was one easy way to keep wildfires from spreading. Fire needed fuel to burn and by depriving it of that, it would have no choice but to go out. They had to do it quickly, however, if the fire arrived before they were done, all of their work would have been for naught.

They had to make their way deep beyond the edge of the woods. The fire truck was parked some distance away, to make sure it would reach them in time to contain the fire. If they didn’t do this right, they could potentially cause the fire to go out of control.

They were at it for about half an hour before the radio attached to Ember’s shoulder hissed and Jenna’s voice came through.

“Ladies, wind just bought us a little more time. It’s blowing west, the fire’s gone over the hill, headed west. Hopefully, they’ll have better luck on that end.”

Ember stopped.

“Old man Farcy lives up in that area. Has anyone made sure he made it out?”

Jenna’s response came through the radio.

“I’m not sure. I’ll contact the team handling west, up by the creek, see if they spotted him leaving.”

Ember could feel the wind now. It was increasing in strength. That meant the fire was going to spread quicker due to the increased supply of oxygen. She was beginning to worry. Perhaps the wind changing directions was not such a blessing…