21. Ivy

21

ivy

6 days until christmas

S tanding in front of the red door of a cozy-looking house with a tin of cookies in hand, I gnawed on my lower lip. I could do this. My grandmother—Ginger—lived right outside of town. Though my grandfather had long since passed away, she still lived in the same house where they’d raised my mom.

Scarlett had insisted she could come with me, but some part of me felt like I needed to do this alone. Though it was thanks to Teddy that I was here. Like he was lending me his strength. His belief in me spoke magnitudes.

Yesterday had been hard. But when I’d tried to push him away, he’d held me tighter. And then we’d built a snowman, and everything else had melted away.

But I wasn’t here for Teddy. I was here for myself—to gain a piece of me back that I’d been missing my whole life.

Finally, I knocked, and a few moments later the door opened.

“Hello, dear,” she said, adjusting the glasses sitting on her face. “How can I help you?” Her grayed hair was pulled back, showing her age.

“Hi,” I squeaked, suddenly forgetting everything I wanted to say. “I’m Ivy. Ivy Winters.” I extended out the cookie tin. “I brought these for you.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “I’m your granddaughter. Can I come in?”

If she was surprised by that, she didn’t so much as balk. Instead, she opened up the door wider, taking the cookies from me. “Come on in, sweetheart. I’ve been expecting you.”

“You have?” I blinked, trying not to let tears fill my eyes.

She gave me a warm smile, leading me into a cozy living room. It smelled homey and welcoming, like something was baking in the oven. “Oh, yes. Nick told me all about you.” Setting the cookies down, she turned towards me.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner,” I said, the words spilling out of me.

My grandma shook her head. “You never have to apologize to me, my sweet girl. I’m just glad you’re here now.” She wrapped me up in a hug, her warmth surrounding me. I’d never known this kind of love before. Unconditional. Like she accepted me completely without a single explanation.

“I’ve always thought I was alone in the world,” I whispered into her hug. “That I didn’t have anyone. A family.” Tears streamed down my face, and I was glad she was holding onto me so tightly so I could cry freely.

Her hand smoothed down my hair. “I wish we had known about you, dear. I’m so sorry you had to grow up all alone.”

She held me like that for a few minutes until my tears turned into sniffles. “I wish I’d known about you .”

“Do you want to sit? I can make you a cup of hot apple cider.” She nodded to the couch before heading into the kitchen .

Settling onto the plush couch, I ran my fingers over a plaid sherpa throw as I took in my surroundings. Her house was eclectic, filled to the brim with decor—plates that featured puppies in Santa hats, and a collection of snowmen on her mantle—and yet it was perfect. If I’d have ever imagined my grandmother’s house before, I would have hoped it was like this.

“Here you are,” she said a few moments later as she handed me a mug.

“Thank you.”

She settled on the couch next to me, smoothing her skirt over her lap. “I had twin daughters, you know. Juniper and Rose. They were inseparable growing up. Did everything together. It shouldn’t surprise me they both gave me such beautiful granddaughters.”

I blushed, not sure how to respond to that. “Do you… know what happened? How she met my dad?” I’d lost them both so young that I’d never gotten to hear their story. How they’d fallen in love.

“Your mother…” she sighed. “Well, Juniper wanted a different life.” I nodded at her. I’d gathered that much, at least. “A lot of the elves here never leave the North Pole. We have little reason to. But your mom, she dreamed of seeing the world. Of experiencing what was outside of our little bubble. So she left. Stowed away in the middle of the night, determined to find something for herself.

“She sent me letters, at first. Meeting Joseph. How happy he made her. He was in the military, and they fell in love quickly. She wrote to me, told me how she planned to marry him. He might not have been an elf, but she felt that connection with him.”

“They were mates?” I guessed.

My grandma nodded. “At least, she suspected so. But elves who spend too much time outside the North Pole lose their magic.”

“What?” My jaw dropped open. “But what about me?” I looked down at my hands. “I lived outside the North Pole my whole life, and I’m fine, aren’t I?”

“I can only assume that she gave up whatever was left when she had you.” She gave me a sad smile. “When your dad passed away… it would have broken her. Living without your mate… That’s not a fate I’d wish on anyone.” Her hand pressed over her heart. “Even now, I miss my Rudy. But I had so many years with him.” She gave me a sad smile. “How did she pass?”

“Cancer,” I said, my eyes filling with tears. “I was five. My dad passed away a two years before that in an accident.”

Her hand slid onto my knee, squeezing softly. “She loved him so much, you know. And I’m sure she loved you even more.”

“The only thing I have left of her is this necklace.” I pulled it out from underneath my sweater. I’d stolen one of Teddy’s again, because it brought me comfort. If I took a deep breath, his scent still clung to it, like pine trees and spice.

Her eyes sparkled. “Oh. We got her that for her eighteenth birthday.”

Somehow, it was even more special now knowing its origin. That it came from my family. One I still had.

“Can you tell me more about her?”

Her eyes sparkled with understanding. “What do you want to know?”

I took a deep breath. “Everything.”

5 days until christmas

Two days had passed since Teddy had asked me to give him a chance. It also keeps you from experiencing love, too. My heart had swelled with the possibility.

But it was too soon. And then I’d be leaving, anyway.

So I’d avoided bringing up the future again. Instead, we’d focused on the list. Presents were wrapped under the tree. A snowman sat in front of the house, wearing one of Teddy’s scarves. And every night, without fail, we lost ourselves in each other’s bodies.

The sex was amazing. I’d never been able to deny that. But I couldn’t deny that I was using it to avoid the more serious conversations we needed to have.

Where was this going? Where did I want it to go? The ball was in my court.

And Teddy was… everything. Everything I’d never let myself want. Because having something meant you could lose it, right? Like I’d lost my parents.

I twiddled the snowflake necklace on its chain as I sat at Teddy’s living room table, working on a handmade gift for Scarlett. It was still so surreal to me that she was my cousin. Yesterday, while I’d been talking to my grandma, Scarlett had come over, and she’d told us both countless stories about our moms. We were fast friends.

It was filling a hole in my heart. A hole that had been there for a long, long time.

“Ivy?” Teddy called, traipsing through the house.

“In here!” I called back, adjusting my position on the chair.

There was snow in his hair, and his cheeks were red from the cold, but I still thought he was the most handsome man I’d ever seen. Even if he lived in the North Pole and had a reindeer named Buddy .

God, I adored him. What was wrong with me? How come I couldn’t just admit it?

He bent his head down, dropping a kiss on my lips. “Hello.”

“Mmm. What was that for?” Though I was all too happy to be kissing him any time, without complaint.

“I have a surprise for you,” Teddy said with a grin.

Raising an eyebrow, I tried not to show my excitement. “You know how many times you’ve said that to me?”

“Yeah, well, this time I mean it.”

Not saying anything else, Teddy grabbed my coat off the hook, opening it for me. I raised an eyebrow, but he just held it up, and I faced the wall, hoping he didn’t notice the way my cheeks warmed from the action as I pushed my arms into the fabric. He slid it onto my shoulders before kissing my neck, inhaling deeply.

“Come on. She’s outside.”

“ She?” I asked, wrapping my new scarf around my neck. “What do you mean, she?—”

Buddy was standing out front, nuzzling another reindeer.

“Who’s this?” I asked, walking over to the second one and rubbing my hand up her nose. She was just as soft as Buddy, though her coloring was slightly lighter and her frame a little smaller.

“She’s yours.”

I turned to him with my jaw open. “Sorry. Hold on. You got me my own reindeer?”

Yes, because this was the craziest thing to happen to me while staying in the North Pole, I thought to myself.

“You can’t just… give me a reindeer, Teddy.” Not when I wasn’t even sure I was going to stay. What if I went home and had to say goodbye?

Teddy walked over to us, and smoothed his hands over the reindeer’s back. “I thought it would be easier. Then you can come and go without having to walk into town. I know you’ve been visiting with Scarlett and your grandmother.”

I rested my hand over his heart. “Teddy, this is too much.”

“No, it’s not.” He cupped my cheek. “Not for you.”

Standing on my tiptoes, I threw my arms around him and kissed him. Deeply. It was the best way I could think of to show him how much I loved this gift. Even if I thought it was insane.

“They’re a bonded pair, you know,” Teddy said after we pulled apart, looking between the two animals. “Her and Buddy.”

“What’s her name?”

He smirked. “Clarice.”

“No way.” There must have been something in my eye. It was perfect. Absurd but perfect. “You’re insane, do you know that?”

“I might have been told that once or twice.” He wrapped his arms around my waist. “Come on, Poison Ivy, say thank you.”

I rolled my eyes. “Thank you, Teddy. She’s perfect.”

“Want to go for a ride?”

4 days until christmas

Ugly Christmas Sweater Party was an understatement. Whatever I’d expected, it hadn’t been this. And I loved every bit of it.

The entire town was gathered in the school’s gym, though the place had been turned into a winter wonderland and was barely recognizable. Apparently, they did this every year as a fundraiser for the school. People crammed together, bringing baked goods and dishes, and threw the best holiday party I’d ever seen.

“I love your sweater,” Scarlett said, her husband Jack at her side. I’d gotten to know him fairly well, too. They’d both grown up here, going to high school together. The two had eloped after college, and Scarlett had just told me tonight that they were expecting their first baby. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen a couple so happy. That looked so right together.

“Thank you.” I looked over at Teddy, who was wearing the same one as mine—just in green. They were ridiculous, but I loved it. We matched, just like a couple.

Maybe there was something to this whole mate business that she’d told me about. But if soulmates were real…

Was it even possible?

My heart yearned for him. If we were mates, what would that change? In my heart, I knew the truth. Everything. It would change everything.

“This party is incredible,” I said, gushing for the fifth time. Teddy had left to get us drink refills. “I still can’t believe this is all real.”

“I’m so glad you’re here,” Scarlett admitted.

“It has been an amazing trip,” I said to Scarlett. “I can’t believe Christmas is almost here already.”

“And once it’s over?” She asked me. “Are you going to go back?”

I worried my lower lip into my mouth. “I don’t have any reason to stay.” Not yet, anyway.

My cousin furrowed her brows. “Teddy hasn’t…”

I shook my head. “No.” He hadn’t asked me to stay. Not really. He’d asked me to give him a chance, but that wasn’t the same thing. I needed the words .

Needed to know what this was for him. Because I knew what it was for me.

That I was falling in love with him. Maybe I’d already fallen, if I was being honest. Somewhere in between cutting down a tree and him giving me a freaking reindeer, I’d been free-falling.

It was just so hard to trust these emotions. To know that he’d catch me. That I could count on this—on us.

“Is that how you really feel?” Teddy asked, a look of utter devastation on his face, two mugs in his hands.

“I don’t—” I shook my head. I didn’t want to do this here. Not with everyone watching, and listening. “Can we go outside?”

He put the coffee cups down on the table, and I apologized to my cousin and her husband—though the two seemed too happy in their newfound bliss for my disappearance to really affect it—before he took my hand, leading us outside into the Christmas Tree lot.

I could feel the tension radiating off his body, but he didn’t say anything even as he kept my hand in his.

“Teddy,” I whispered. “Talk to me. Please.”

He dropped my hand, pinching his brow before turning away like he couldn’t face me. “I thought that maybe…” He gave an exasperated sigh. “Never mind. It’s dumb, anyway.” Teddy huffed out a breath as he turned back to me, the action pushing the brown strands of hair off his forehead.

Ask me , I wanted to beg. Because as much as I knew I needed to return to my life, something was different here. Something just felt right. And I wanted to understand what that was.

Maybe it was a fluke. But maybe, just maybe…

“You haven’t asked,” I whispered. “And I… I can’t make a decision unless I know what you want. I have a life there.” A life I wasn’t in any rush to get back to. A life that, without Sa rah, I wouldn’t have thought twice about. I was replaceable at Santa’s Christmasland, and I knew it. But here…

“You can have a life here, too. With me. Please stay,” Teddy begged, stepping up close to me. His hand raised, brushing a strand of hair back behind my ear. “Stay with me.”

Shutting my eyes, I let his words rush through me. Did I want that? To stay? Yes.

But why couldn’t I give him the words?

He seemed to notice my hesitation. I’d tell him soon how I felt. What I wanted. The decision I’d made. But tonight… Tonight, I wanted things to be about him. For him to know how special he was. He did his best every day to show me how cherished I was. And he deserved that, too.

“Come on,” he said, holding out a hand. “Let’s go inside and get out of the cold.”

I took it.

“Sweetheart?” Teddy called from the other room. I’d snuck in here to surprise him after we’d gotten back from the party, wanting to find some way to thank him for everything he’d been doing for me.

The last few hours had been torture. Not being able to leave the party, to reassure Teddy that I didn’t want to leave him, to show him how much he meant to me… It was harder than I’d ever imagined.

Luckily, Scarlett had the perfect idea when I’d talked to her earlier, and between all the extra supplies lingering around the house, I’d been able to create the perfect surprise.

Sprawling out across the bed, I propped myself up with an arm, letting my loose hair tumble around my shoulders. A scrap of red fabric covered my bottom half, and I’d found my favorite red fuck-me heels in my suitcase. Where I’d thought I would wear these, I had no idea, but I was glad I had them. I looked hot, my lips covered in a deep red, my hair just begging to have his hands buried in it.

“Ivy.” Teddy’s jaw dropped as he walked in, seeing me ready for him.

I fiddled with the large, red bow I’d tied over my breasts. “Aren’t you going to unwrap your present, Theodore?”

“But it’s not Christmas yet, sweetheart. And it would be wrong of me to open my gift early, wouldn’t it?” He smirked.

“I think Santa could make an exception for you.” I traced a finger over my cleavage. “Since you’ve been such a good boy, haven’t you, Teddy?”

“No Santa talk in the bedroom,” he muttered, coming to stand in front of me. “I do not want to think about my dad when I’m also thinking about the dirty, dirty things I want to do to you.”

“Maybe you’ll make the naughty list after all.” I winked.

“But then I wouldn’t get my present, would I, baby?” He leaned close enough that he could whisper the words into my ear before nibbling on the pointed tip with his teeth.

A shudder ran through my body. It was crazy how sensitive my ears were. How just the brush of his finger over them felt like fireworks sparking over my skin.

God, I was wet. The second he touched me he’d realize how much. How much I wanted him. Needed him—this.

“Unwrap me,” I whispered. “Touch me. I’m all yours to open.”

“You are,” he agreed, his voice hardly a murmur. “All mine.”

Yes. I was.

Stripping his clothes, he crawled onto the bed in only his boxer briefs—a pair of green and red plaid striped ones with little trees—and then pulled me onto his lap, fiddling with the bow I’d tied over my breasts.

“Fuck, I like this. These pretty little tits, all wrapped up for me.”

“Yes,” I agreed.

“Makes me wonder what other filthy things I can do to them, Ivy, sweetheart. Maybe one day, you’ll let me fuck them.”

Nodding instead of answering, I tilted my head back as he pressed a kiss to my neck. “You always smell so damn good, Ivy. Like cookies and all things sweet.”

I understood the sentiment perfectly. He smelled like pine trees, and it was almost embarrassing how many times a day I wanted to bury my face in his shirt to breathe in his scent.

“It makes me want to tie you up and never let you go.”

“Then do it,” I said, moaning as he sucked my sensitive skin into his mouth. “Tie me up. Fuck me hard. Give me everything .”

He groaned, pulling at the ribbon until my perky tits sprung free. He buried his face in between them, giving them ample attention until I was squirming, painting, and all too aware of the growing wetness between my legs.

Teddy tore the red panties off my body, dropping the scraps onto the ground.

“Fuck,” he said, pushing two fingers inside of me. “You’re so wet. My naughty girl.”

I could barely think as he scissored them inside of me, letting my head fall back as I rode his fingers. Little whimpers slipped free from my throat, and I couldn’t control my body’s reaction to him. I was so close, so amped up from the way he’d touched me, from everything about him that drove me wild. He was stretching me, filling me with just those magnificent fingers, getting me ready for him.

“Are you going to come all over my fingers, baby?” Teddy’s deep voice said against my ear. He pressed a kiss to my neck, sucking lightly on the spot as his thumb found my clit, and I lost it. I climaxed, my release coating his fingers as he kept working me through it.

He pulled them out, licking them clean as he kept his green eyes pinned to me. Filthy and so goddamn hot. I felt empty immediately, feeling the loss of them inside of me, but I couldn’t focus on that for long. Teddy’s erection pressed against my still-sensitive clit from my orgasm, and I gasped. He was hard, straining against those boxers, and I wanted—no, needed—him inside of me. Rocking against him again, I let out a low moan.

Slipping my hand inside the material, I palmed his cock, running my hand up and down his length. He was hot and heavy in my hands, hard and yet silky soft as I squeezed his shaft.

“Ivy,” he groaned. “If you keep that up, I’m going to come in my pants.”

“Then take them off,” I said, my voice so husky I barely recognized it.

He complied by shoving them down his hips, repositioning us to get the fabric off his body, and letting his cock spring free. Bending down, I licked the tip, swiping a bead of pre-cum off the top and savoring his salty taste. He was so much bigger than anyone else I’d ever been with, and when I wrapped my hands around his length to fist him again, my fingers could barely wrap all the way around. Teddy grunted, stilling my hands with his. “Sweetheart,” he warned. His hands moved down my body like he was exploring every inch with his hands, his fingers curling over my pointy ears before pulling me up so our bodies were lined up.

“Ride me,” Teddy said, laying down on his back and pulling me so I sat on his hips. “Let me see those tits bounce for me. I wanna see how your pretty pussy swallows me whole, baby.”

“Thought you were gonna tie me up,” I teased. But secretly, my pussy clenched at the idea. Why did I like that so much? The idea of him tying me up, made it so I couldn’t leave him. Maybe I wanted him to keep me here. The idea of other ways he could keep me here.

“Later.” He grinned, his dark brown hair falling onto his forehead as he helped guide me up, lining me up with his cock.

What would it look like for me to stay here? Because I wanted it, needed it.

Because I loved him.

I loved him . There was no denying that, even to myself.

Sinking down onto his length, I felt a rush of emotions flow through me, tears pricking at my eyes as he filled me.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” Teddy asked, tenderly bringing his hand to my eyes and brushing away the tears on my cheeks with his thumb. I nodded. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

I shook my head. “No.” It was the opposite. Everything he’d done for me—he’d been healing my bruised heart. Showing me I could love again. “You didn’t hurt me.” He couldn’t. I knew that now.

Placing my hands on his firm chest, enjoying the feel of his well-defined abs under my fingers, I sank down the rest of the way till I’d taken all of him into my body.

Teddy grunted but held himself still underneath me. Waiting for me to move. Waiting for me to take the lead. He always had, hadn’t he? He’d waited for me to to be ready for him. To take those steps toward us.

His fingers grasped my hips, digging into my skin as I started to rock my hips against him. I knew it wouldn’t take long. Not with this emotion bursting through my chest. Not when he was looking at me with so much care, so much emotion.

“Ivy…” Teddy whispered as I cried out, his hips thrusting up from below to meet me in rhythm. “Let go, baby. It’s okay. I’ll catch you.”

And I knew he would.

I knew he always would.

So I let go.