Chapter 19

19

The next day, Patience knelt beside her roses, carefully examining their progress. She breathed in the earthy scent of the damp soil and the overgrown garden she had ached to put in order. Her spirits had been lifted since yesterday, one of the best days since her wedding.

She'd seen a side of Dorian she'd never expected. He was a kind man—a wounded man, but a kind one. She was worried about the cuts from the broken mirror, though they were now healing, and her heart was filled with the pain she'd seen in his eyes when he told her about his papa. And the connection that grew between the two of them was like an invisible but strong cord.

She looked at the tangle of weeds and grass, dotted with dandelions and brambles, that could become lawns with pretty flowering bushes. The garden was like him—abandoned, neglected, wild.

She longed to prune the ancient, gnarled trees with their branches like a canopy that swallowed the light, remove dried and diseased ones for firewood, and plant new trees. The paths that were now barely discernible amid the overgrowth could get fresh gravel and new, more pleasing shapes.

Dorian was everywhere, surrounding her, in the early April air—which held a chill despite the sun and the buzz of insects. Unseen creatures rustled in the undergrowth. Just like him, the garden was dark, and perhaps unwelcoming at first glance, but full of life if only one would care for it and allow it to thrive.

In the far corner was the glasshouse. She dreamed Dorian would allow her to use it one day. She could clean its glass panes, replace the broken ones, remove all the dead and rotting vegetation, and plant exotic species.

Oh, it could be such a joy to watch them grow, care for them, make observations and perhaps a new discovery.

Perhaps one day, she thought with a smile.

But there was one dark, ominous cloud in the clearing sky of their marriage.

The strange connection he had with her deceased brother. The "Oxford incident" he refused to acknowledge. His hand always hidden under the glove. These were secrets she ached to uncover.

He had opened up to her yesterday, and she now felt closer to him. She had more hope for her happiness with her husband than ever before. In time, he might feel comfortable enough with her that his walls would fall completely, and he'd tell her about John.

If not, she must do everything she could to learn the truth or there would always be a barrier between their hearts.

Amid all the untouched wilderness, the only place that showed signs of new life were the rosebushes she'd planted just two weeks ago. They seemed to be adapting well to their new environment. She could see tiny, bright green leaves and even more tiny red buds swelling.

She looked closely for any signs of disease—shriveling of the buds or wilting of the leaves. She also looked for thrips, aphids, and other pests but could see only a ladybug and a bee, which were both beneficial.

She reached for her notebook, her fingers brushing against the supple leather cover. Inside, the pages were filled with meticulous notes and detailed sketches, years of observation and work. At least she didn't have to hide her notes and her roses here, nor report to anyone why she spent so much time staring at rosebushes instead of planting vegetables.

As she flipped to a blank page to happily record the progress of the roses and the lack of disease or pests, a shadow fell across the paper. Patience looked up, shielding her eyes against the sun, and found herself face-to-face with Chastity.

Dorian's sister wore a dark gray silk dress, which was plain despite the expensive material. Her sky-blue eyes, bright and kind behind her spectacles, resembled her brother's. Her hair was styled in a simple chignon with no curls, tendrils, or accessories to enhance her beauty. Patience, whom Mademoiselle Antoinette dressed with a fierce dedication to fashion, felt a pang of envy.

"Good morning, Duchess," Chastity said, her voice cool and measured, despite the curiosity glowing in her eyes. "Did Dorian allow you to plant these?"

Patience rose to her feet, brushing the dirt from her skirts. "Ah, Lady Chastity, welcome back. He did, can you imagine? Are you moving back in?"

"Yes, if that is agreeable? Did I give you and Dorian enough time to get acquainted after the wedding?"

"Of course!" said Patience, a little breathless. "I didn't mean to force you out of your own home. You were always welcome to stay."

"It's tradition, I think," said Chastity, a little shyly.

Her gaze dropped to the tiny leaves on the roses, such a striking contrast with the rest of the dark and overgrown garden.

"Dorian hasn't let anyone touch the garden since he became duke twelve years ago," said Chastity with a slight wrinkle between her brows. "How did you manage to convince him?"

Patience chuckled. "He is a kind man deep down."

Chastity studied her with a puzzled look in her intelligent eyes. Patience decided not to elaborate on what it actually took to have Dorian agree to this…her bare buttocks, his hand, and oh dear God…

"Are you interested in roses?" Chastity asked.

"I am, indeed. It's been my project the past six years. I've been trying to create a new variety of roses that would be both beautiful and resistant to disease. I brought these with me from home."

Chastity's eyebrows rose. "Are you a botanist?"

"I suppose I am," said Patience with a shy smile.

"How marvelous! Never did I expect to have a new sister who's a fellow scientist. Tell me more." Chastity's eyes burned with enthusiasm, and a genuine smile lit up her face. It was the first time Patience had seen her smile.

Patience's own spirits soared. With her husband being such an enigma, she ached to have a true friend, like Anne. Chastity was her new sister. Like Dorian, she seemed aloof, cold, and distant, but maybe she had a good heart, too.

"Well," Patience began, excitement filling her with lightness, "I started by selecting two rose varieties—the gallica rose, known for its hardiness and disease resistance, and the damask rose, prized for its beautiful, fragrant blooms. I decided to artificially fertilize them."

Chastity clasped her hands. "Artificially fertilize them? How did you come up with that idea?"

Patience smiled, pleased to discuss her innovative technique. "I was inspired by a book my brother brought from Oxford. He brought several, to refresh our limited library, and there was one talking about the reproduction process of plants. From it, I wondered what would happen if I combined two varieties of roses by pollinating them before they pollinated themselves. I wondered if, like animals, the resulting plants might have the combined traits of both parents. A theory, of course, but I wanted to experiment and see what happened."

"Intriguing," Chastity murmured, her eyes alight. "All we know is that plants reproduce by pollination and that bees and other insects contribute to it. I suppose a person could do that themselves, though the results would be unknown. This is certainly a novel approach!"

"Yes, it is possible, but it took me several experiments to get it right. I found out it needed to be cold like in winter for them to germinate and grow. Not all of them took, but these did." She proudly gestured at her roses. "Bloomed two years ago for the first time."

"Remarkable," Chastity mused. "And have you been noting the performance of these hybrids?"

"Indeed I have," Patience said, her face glowing with pride. "I've been monitoring them since the very beginning. The results have been outstanding. They showed greater disease resistance than their parents, and the flowers are simply stunning."

Chastity leaned in, studying the meticulously recorded data. "This is impressive work, Patience. The level of detail in your observations, the innovative approach…it's quite brilliant."

Patience basked in the praise, feeling a surge of validation. "Thank you, Lady Chastity. That means a great deal. I must say, my sister Anne's eyes always glazed over when I talked to her about them, even though she's a mathematician herself. Talk to her about equations, the number pi, or number theory, and she lights up. It's the first time that I've spoken to someone who shares my enthusiasm."

Chastity chuckled. "I quite understand that. When I talk to Dorian about my medical experiments, I get a similar reaction."

An understanding of a shared passion ran between them, and a jolt of joy made Patience's stomach do a happy lurch. Medical experiments? Fascinating! She had just opened her mouth to ask about them when Chastity's expression grew serious.

"There's just one thing, Duchess. I may be wrong, but you haven't mentioned a control group. Have you been noting the performance of the original gallica and damask varieties alongside your hybrids in the same way?"

Patience's smile faltered, a sinking feeling settling in her stomach. "I…I have some data on them, but I haven't been as systematic. I was so focused on the hybrids…"

She trailed off, realizing the gravity of her mistake. Without a control group, how could she be certain that the improved disease resistance was due to intentional fertilization and not just natural variation?

Chastity sighed, not unkindly. "It's an understandable oversight for a beginning botanist. But for your findings to be truly meaningful, you need that baseline comparison. Without it, your conclusions could be just a coincidence."

Patience nodded, feeling a hot flush of shame wash over her. She had been so caught up in the excitement of her hybridization successes that she had neglected a fundamental aspect of scientific inquiry.

As Chastity continued to talk, Patience felt the weight of her shortcomings pressing down on her. The garden seemed to blur before her eyes, the once-vibrant roses now a mocking reminder of her own inadequacies. What was she hoping to publish? She'd be laughed at by the scientific community, especially being so young and a woman.

Mentally, she chastised herself for feeling this way. Positive thoughts! she told herself. It was good that she hadn't sent her paper yet. Perhaps she shouldn't do this at all.

She was just a beginning botanist, as Chastity had said.

"Thank you, Lady Chastity," said Patience, fighting to contain the pain of disappointment from spilling in tears. "You're very knowledgeable."

Chastity's blue eyes saddened behind her spectacles. "I must have disappointed you. I am sorry. It's not easy for me to make friends, but I do appreciate a fellow female scientist. There aren't many of us. Would you care for a walk?"

"Of course," said Patience and the two of them walked slowly towards Rath Hall, the sun warm on Patience's face.

"Did you have to work hard to educate yourself?" asked Chastity.

Patience smiled. "Yes. It was not easy, though I'm sure if we'd had money to buy food and a cook to prepare meals, my parents wouldn't have minded me growing roses, reading books, and making my notes. Instead, I had to grow what we ate, and my sisters prepared it."

Chastity nodded thoughtfully. "Our positions are not to be taken for granted. I hope you do have freedom now to pursue it?"

Patience smiled. "Your brother is very supportive."

"He is. He was for me, too."

Patience frowned. "How so?"

"My deceased papa disapproved of my scientific inclinations greatly."

Patience held her breath. That must have been what Dorian had started to tell her in the carriage when they visited the tenants. He'd told her something about Chastity and his papa, but then interrupted himself.

Chastity continued, "He burned my books, forbade me access to the library, and even took away all paper and ink for a while. He called me vile names. No one in my life has hurt me as much as Papa did. My brother fought for my right to study science."

Chastity's gaze flickered shortly towards the glasshouse as her face grew somber and took on a haunted expression similar to Dorian's.

Patience's chest tightened with empathy, and her heart filled with tenderness towards Dorian. This was yet another side of her husband. He was a man who protected his sister's right to study what she wanted.

If only he would tell her about John… There was a mysterious, invisible thread that connected him and her, through her brother, and she wanted to know why.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Chastity. My parents never burned my botanical books or took away my journals or ink. However, they told me to spend my time working in the kitchen garden rather than with my roses. For years, I had to carry out my research in secret. Thankfully, they couldn't see what I was doing from the house. My own rosebushes hid me."

Chastity smiled sadly as they came to the entrance into the house. "I suppose we have more in common than we both thought."

Patience smiled as she tried and failed to lock her disappointment and sadness in her emotion basket. Why was this not working? She had been doing it every night by herself, and most of the time, it made her feel better… Except…

What if it wasn't possible to run from these feelings? She'd never felt anything like what she felt towards Dorian before .

So…maybe she shouldn't lock away these feelings?

Could she ask Chastity? Was this too new of a friendship to ask about the one thing that had been bothering her from the moment at Lady Buchanan's soirée when she'd overheard Dorian speaking to Luhst and Pryde about John?

"Have you by any chance heard of Dorian's connection with my brother, Mr. John Rose?" asked Patience.

Chastity frowned and narrowed her eyes, looking at her. "No, I'm sorry. I've never heard of Mr. John Rose. Was he present at the wedding? I apologize if I forgot."

Disappointment fell through Patience's stomach like a stone. "You have not forgotten. My brother died twelve years ago, and I thought our brothers might have known each other."

She could have told Chastity about her worries. If they were real sisters now, she would have told her every worry she had and asked her for any tiny piece of information, any clue that could help her to discern this secret and get closer to her husband.

"Oh, I am so sorry, Patience," said Chastity, biting her lip. "I did not know."

"Please do not apologize," said Patience with a smile and a little relief Chastity didn't know about the suicide, that her opinion of Patience and her family wouldn't be destroyed. "You did nothing wrong. It's just…I've been always so surprised how your brother decided to marry me without ever meeting me."

"I was surprised by his sudden announcement of the wedding, too. All his adult life, he's resisted our aunt's insistence on him finding a wife and continuing the Rath line. Then from one day to the next, he announced he would marry. It was all very quick."

"Do you have any idea why it was so sudden?" asked Patience, her hands shaking a little as they walked .

"As far as I heard, he wanted to help your papa. Forgive me, but Mr. Rose was in a dire situation, was he not?"

"Indeed," said Patience, her stomach dropping with disappointment at the lack of new insight. "He was."

"Perhaps my brother is the best person to answer your questions," suggested Chastity. "I wish I could help, but I'm afraid I simply do not know."

Patience nodded, putting a smile on her face. It wasn't Lady Chastity's fault, but Patience's throat tightened, and she struggled to keep up a cheerful conversation with Chastity.

But, as always, she managed to cling to her happy smile.